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About The daily Astorian. (Astoria, Or.) 1961-current | View Entire Issue (May 28, 2015)
THE DAILY ASTORIAN • THURSDAY, MAY 28, 2015 FEATURES 5A What to do for dad’s last days? Tomorrow’s horoscope By Holiday Mathis, Creators Syndicate Inc. Dear Annie: My father was in prison for my entire childhood. I am now 23 and have managed to build a good relationship with him since he was released two years ago. Recently, Dad became very ill and stopped breathing. He was on life support for a week. Because I am his closest relative, I am in charge of his health care. I was told the dam- age was too severe and he would never recover. They expect him to die within weeks. When Dad woke up, I was given the option of making him “comfortable” with medicine that would even- tually stop his breathing. I want Dad to be happy in his last days, so I asked him what he wanted. He said he wanted to live with me, so I brought him home, and he is in hospice care. Now his brothers are furious that I didn’t put him in a nursing home. They think he would get rehab there and be able to live a normal life again. When my father was incarcer- ated, no one in his family made any effort to be in my life. Dad told his brothers that he is pre- pared to die and wants to spend his last days with his daughter and his grandchildren. Plus, a Annie’s Mailbox Creators Syndicate Inc. Kathy Mitchell and Marcy Sugar nursing home won’t treat him if he refuses treatment, and it isn’t likely to help him in any event. He suffered terrible brain dam- age when he stopped breathing. But, Annie, his brothers are making my life terribly stress- ful. I have tried to explain to them that they can’t make him fight this battle, and sadly, they cannot fight it for him. I feel so overwhelmed. I am thinking of forcing Dad to go to a nurs- ing home so his brothers will know he had every chance. But if he dies there (and he proba- bly would), I will hate myself for not letting him live his re- maining days the way he wants. I don’t want to regret this deci- sion forever. What do I do? — Your Happiness or His? Dear Happiness: As long as your father is capable of making this decision, please respect him enough to allow it. His brothers feel helpless, and that is why they are badgering you to put him in a nursing home. We urge you to have Dad’s doctors and someone from hospice speak to your uncles directly and explain the situation so they will under- stand more clearly what is at stake. Our condolences. Dear Annie: May I add to the comments on chewing gum during exercise class and sports activities? When I was a senior, in 1959, I attended a high school facul- ty-senior basketball game in front of the entire student body. Our wrestling coach ran up the court and suddenly stopped and dropped to his knees. Everyone, including the other coaches, thought he was having a heart attack. He lay there and died. I wrestled for four years un- der his coaching. We later found out he had been chewing gum and it got stuck in his windpipe, and that’s what killed him. It was one of the saddest days in the school’s history. True story. I can’t say it more strongly: No gum chewing during sports. — Still Sad FRANK AND ERNEST BLONDIE THATABABY SALLY FORTH STONE SOUP B.C. LOLA DILBERT SIX CHIX BIZARRO MUTTS NON SEQUITUR BABY BLUES WIZARD OF ID ZITS ROSE IS ROSE ARIES (March 21-April 19). Maybe you feel like you’ve let yourself down recently, but the cause of underperformance may well be a lack of self-love. How could you better appreciate yourself? Give yourself attention because you need it to thrive. TAURUS (April 20-May 20). You know that area you’re weak in? Well, guess what. You’re not really weak in that area at all — you’re just inexperienced. Get more prac- tice, and you’ll grow rapidly. GEMINI (May 21-June 21). Your entire be- ing cannot be captured in one snapshot. For this reason, you don’t have to worry about how you’re viewed by others. Most people only see a very small part of you anyhow. CANCER (June 22-July 22). Befriend time. Settle into the belief that everything is happening in the moment that it should. Rushing or pushing, even if you are running late, will not get you where you’re supposed to be any faster. LEO (July 23-Aug. 22). You may feel like you’re being punished, and probably the dis- ciplinarian is a voice inside your head. Try not to think of things in terms of bad or good. So you made a choice that didn’t work. Choose again. VIRGO (Aug. 23-Sept. 22). You are drawn to objects that help you appreciate time’s natural process. Such objects are records of the sun, wind, rain, temperature and human wear. They remind you of the fragility and the strength inside you. LIBRA (Sept. 23-Oct. 23). You have a honed aesthetic. You don’t follow the con- ventions of good taste, even though you know what those conventions are. The irreg- ularity that happens by chance or accident will be especially beautiful to you. SCORPIO (Oct. 24-Nov. 21). You influ- ence the people you believe in, perhaps without even trying to. You know they can accomplish great things, and your belief in them helps to make this come true. SAGITTARIUS (Nov. 22-Dec. 21). Your acts of caring do not only affect the people and animals close to you. They are part of what brings your whole community closer. You’ll never know how you’ve contributed to the world by making one person happy. CAPRICORN (Dec. 22-Jan. 19). Follow through in full confidence. You are capable, efficient and effective. Believe and act on what you believe. You’ll be on sure footing every step of the way. You’ve got this one. AQUARIUS (Jan. 20-Feb. 18). The work at hand will help you to develop your iden- tity. So dive in, even if you suspect the job is not a perfect fit for you. You’ll learn about yourself in the process, and that’s what’s important. PISCES (Feb. 19-March 20). Is it love or not? To determine this, it might help you to think of love as an action, not a feeling. When you do, it suddenly will be obvious who loves whom. FRIDAY’S BIRTHDAY (May 29). Your world will grow, but don’t worry — your in- fluence will, too. New projects beckon you in June. Apply what you learned (to prove that you learned it), and you’ll have a round of beginner’s luck. Making money inspires you to make more in July. September brings sparkling new relationships and peace to those who were ailing. Aries and Libra peo- ple adore you. Your lucky numbers are: 2, 49, 3, 21 and 15.