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About The daily Astorian. (Astoria, Or.) 1961-current | View Entire Issue (March 3, 2015)
FEATURES 8A Dad wants to stay in touch Dear Annie: I am a 51-year-old man and have been unemployed for the past three years. Last year, my wife asked for a divorce. My question is: What can I do to re- vitalize my relationship with my three teenage children? I have to initiate all phone calls and texts. They never ask how I am. The youngest is forthcoming about events in his life, but my daughters require extensive questioning, and all I get are brief answers. I understand that they are angry with me, but I am trying my best to get a new job and move on with my life. Every time I see them, I tell them that I miss them, but only my son says he misses me, too. It is so frustrating that I don’t want to do this much longer. I have started apply- ing for jobs out of state so I won’t have to deal with the disappointment. I feel that they are trying to keep me out of their lives. If so, I should just stop trying so hard. I don’t like spending my days think- ing about them and feeling hurt. What do you suggest? — Feeling Unloved Dear Unloved: Please do not cut your children out of your life because they are angry and confused and taking it out on you. No matter how upsetting their be- havior, they still need you. They also need to know that you will not give up on them. Talk to your ex-wife. Explain how this hurts the children, and ask for her help in maintaining a better relation- the family. Your sister and her husband were “the family.” While you are not ob- ligated to go to the funeral of someone you barely know, it would have been a Creators kindness to go for your sister’s sake, or Syndicate Inc. at least give her the impression that you wanted to be there but had other serious Kathy Mitchell obligations. and We do think your sister overreacted Marcy Sugar in the moment, but we also know you’d OLNHWR¿[WKLV6RDSRORJL]HWRKHU7HOO ship — for their sakes. Your contact at her you are so sorry you didn’t go to the WKLVPRPHQWLQWLPHZLOOUHÀHFWRQWKHLU funeral, that you should have been there feelings for you in the future, when they for her and her husband, and that you are more mature and able to gain per- deeply regret it and hope she can forgive spective. We know it’s hard. Please don’t you. It’s not too much to do for a sibling make it permanent. relationship that you value. Dear Annie: My sister and her hus- Dear Annie: I read the letter from band have disowned us because we did “Frustrated Wife,” whose husband not go to a memorial service for her hus- leaves the cabinet doors open and never band’s brother, who passed away after a puts tools away. long battle with cancer. My wonderful, hardworking, intel- My wife and I saw this brother once ligent husband exhibits these same ten- every few years at family occasions. dencies. I would come home from work We were never at his home. The day of H[KDXVWHGDQG¿QGWKHFXSERDUGGRRUV the service, my sister called and asked open and things all over the countertops. whether I was coming. I said no, that I $W¿UVW,IXPHG7KHQ*RGSXWWKH had other things going on, and she hung thought into my head: If my husband up. were dead, my cupboard doors would We are in our late 60s, and I think it’s be closed, the screwdriver would be put a shame for them to end a relationship away and nothing would be out of place. over this. Were we wrong? — Weighing 6R , VWDUWHG VD\LQJ WR P\VHOI ³7KDQN on My Mind in Pennsylvania you. Hubby is still alive.” The difference Dear Weighing: The point of at- in my attitude makes a big difference in tending a funeral is to pay respects to my life. — Petite Wife in Nebraska Annie’s Mailbox FRANK AND ERNEST BLONDIE THATABABY SALLY FORTH STONE SOUP B.C. LOLA DILBERT SIX CHIX BIZARRO MUTTS NON SEQUITUR BABY BLUES WIZARD OF ID ZITS ROSE IS ROSE THE DAILY ASTORIAN • TUESDAY, MARCH 3, 2015 Tomorrow’s horoscope By Holiday Mathis, Creators Syndicate Inc. ARIES (March 21-April 19). It’s nice when things come easily, but it’s not always beneficial. Difficulties are just part of your initiation. They give you a sense of belong- ing you wouldn’t have otherwise, and they get you ready for the challenges ahead. TAURUS (April 20-May 20). People have a tendency to reject what they haven’t tasted, but you’re more adventurous than that. The vegetables (and life’s equivalent) are typically good for you, and you’ll like them if you give them a chance. GEMINI (May 21-June 21). You’ll find yourself in a room full of VIPs, and you very much belong there. Bring reality to the group before anyone’s head explodes. When ev- eryone is famous, no one is famous. CANCER (June 22-July 22). Your half- hearted effort will yield results that are on par with your wholehearted effort. Maybe this is unfair, or maybe it’s extremely fair, considering you’ve already put in your time and paid your dues. LEO (July 23-Aug. 22). Love may be stabilizing, but it’s not like a rock. You can’t give it to someone and expect it to keep the same shape through the ages. Like bread, you have to make it fresh every time you give it. VIRGO (Aug. 23-Sept. 22). Rigor, rele- vance, relationships and responsibility. It’s more than a high school motto; it’s the way you live your life. These four “r’s” will shape your days this week. LIBRA (Sept. 23-Oct. 23). Einstein sug- gested that reality is a (very persistent) illu- sion, making a good case for persistence in general. If you behave in a certain way enough times, you’ll be characterized as the essence of that behavior. SCORPIO (Oct. 24-Nov. 21). Your con- science will prevent you from fully indulg- ing in extravagance. You’ll dip your toe in, though. How can you help it when such luxurious options present themselves? SAGITTARIUS (Nov. 22-Dec. 21). There’s a competition going on, and if you continue to work hard, you’ll be the sure winner. Be sure to distinguish between competition and fun, though. There’s no winner at fun (unless you count everyone). CAPRICORN (Dec. 22-Jan. 19). It’s said that the right habits will give you the key to the universe. Indeed, if you can command yourself to do as you think you should, you’ll have many new options. AQUARIUS (Jan. 20-Feb. 18). Don’t as- sume that people know what you’re about. Start from the beginning. Give them some context. Take your time — they want you to. You’re more entertaining than you know. PISCES (Feb. 19-March 20). You don’t write your name now the same way you did when you were 8, and you don’t dress the same way you did in the ’90s. Your style is ever-evolving, as is evident by today’s choices. WEDNESDAY’S BIRTHDAY (March 4). This month’s challenge is a no-brainer. You’ll excel because you do what you’re supposed to be doing. Next month will bring a new deal. Putting in extra work hours will help you fulfill a wish. June brings you a gift that’s hard to come by, rare or expensive. Someone special will capture your heart in September. Aries and Aquar- ius people adore you. Your lucky numbers are: 10, 8, 30, 15 and 19.