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About The daily Astorian. (Astoria, Or.) 1961-current | View Entire Issue (Feb. 19, 2015)
THE DAILY ASTORIAN • THURSDAY, FEBRUARY 19, 2015 FEATURES 5A She’s tired of husband ignoring son Tomorrow’s horoscope By Holiday Mathis, Creators Syndicate Inc. Dear Annie: I have been married to “Bob” for 11 years. Once we had our son, “Jack,” everything changed. Bob found excuses not to be home, worked all kinds of overtime or had to “go some- where.” I can count on one hand the times he did anything with Jack or was even home on a weekend during our VRQ¶V¿UVW¿YH\HDUV Jack is now 8 and has no real rela- tionship with his father and no desire for one. When he was little and asked where Daddy was, I covered for Bob, but now that Jack is older, he knows what’s what. The kid is no dummy. Things continue to get worse. Bob accepts no responsibility for his son. He makes nearly twice my salary, but won’t give me a dime toward Jack’s clothes, shoes or school supplies, let alone birth- day presents, although he wants his name on the gifts. He even tries to get out of paying for groceries and babysit- ters. Bob pays the mortgage and the tax- es. Everything else is my responsibility. I carry Jack on my health insurance. I also don’t like to leave Jack alone with his father. If anything goes wrong, Bob blames Jack and ends up hollering at him for ridiculous things like forget- ting to turn off a light or not wanting to go to the store with him, and then lays a guilt trip on the boy, saying, “Don’t you want to spend time with me?” I have tried talking to Bob about Annie’s Mailbox Creators Syndicate Inc. Kathy Mitchell and Marcy Sugar this. I tell him it is the parents’ responsi- bility to make time for their children, not the other way around. He refuses coun- seling, saying he doesn’t need anyone to tell him how to raise his kid. Jack already has anger issues and acts out. I am ready to give up on our marriage. Bob and I are more like room- mates than spouses. I sometimes think Jack and I would be better off on our own. Any advice? — Sinking Ship in Pennsylvania Dear Pennsylvania: Bob withholds funds for the support of his family and either neglects or yells at his son. These things can be interpreted as forms of abuse. Bob has no interest in counseling because he has no interest in being a bet- ter father. Sometimes leaving this type of situation is healthier than staying. Please get counseling for yourself and for Jack and decide your best course of action. Dear Annie: I’ve been dating “Joe” for a year. We are both divorced parents. My children are in college, and Joe’s 17-year-old daughter lives with him. “Tawny” is a nice young lady, but she re- lies on us to provide her with a social life. Tawny attended one semester at a nearby community college. She was ¿UHG IURP KHU MRE DQG EDVLFDOO\ VLWV DW home all day. She rarely does house- work. I understand that she is bored and lonely and have suggested she do some volunteer work to get out and meet peo- ple. Joe is as frustrated as I am. He has spoken to Tawny about it, but nothing has changed. I don’t mind including her in our plans once in a while, but she ex- pects to go everywhere with us and has attitude if she’s not invited. She even fol- lows us from room to room. Joe has asked me to move in with him, but I don’t want to end up resenting Tawny and creating problems with our relationship. — Help Dear Help: Please do not move in with Joe. Instead, suggest that Tawny get counseling for what could be depres- sion and to help her gain focus. That girl needs guidance, and Joe isn’t providing it. Dear Annie: I read the letter from “Concerned Daughter,” whose recently divorced mother was suicidal and even held her brother’s gun to her head. Your advice was good, but you didn’t mention the most important thing: Lock up and hide the darn gun. — Connecticut FRANK AND ERNEST BLONDIE THATABABY SALLY FORTH STONE SOUP B.C. LOLA DILBERT SIX CHIX BIZARRO MUTTS NON SEQUITUR BABY BLUES WIZARD OF ID ZITS ROSE IS ROSE ARIES (March 21-April 19). You can- not change another person. However, when you offer your assistance without the expectation that the other person will change, you will make a difference. TAURUS (April 20-May 20). You refuse to see any situation as tragic or futile and are determined to find whatever advan- tage might exist. You’ll be successful in this quest, brightening the world for you and the ones you love. GEMINI (May 21-June 21). When you connect with a person as well as you connect with a certain someone, you can communicate profoundly in total silence. Therefore, don’t worry about what you’ll say. CANCER (June 22-July 22). Fantasies become realities. It happens all the time, so why not for you? Some small occur- rence that you wished would happen will materialize in front of your eyes. LEO (July 23-Aug. 22). Needing vali- dation makes you vulnerable. If there are words you long to hear, then hearing them will only weaken you. Be strong on your own, keep your power, validate yourself. VIRGO (Aug. 23-Sept. 22). You wish ev- eryone well — yes, every single person. That doesn’t mean you have to like them all. When you don’t expect to have a great affinity for most people you have to deal with, the way becomes smoother. LIBRA (Sept. 23-Oct. 23). Sometimes you feel so connected to nature and the energy of it around you that you wish you could go live in the woods. Appreciating natural beauty makes you more naturally beautiful. SCORPIO (Oct. 24-Nov. 21). There’s a protocol, but don’t feel overly obligated to follow it. Pretending won’t work today, but doors will open to you when you show who you really are. SAGITTARIUS (Nov. 22-Dec. 21). Terri- torial issues will come up. There’s a lot you can let slide until next week. Everything that irritates you about others can lead you to a better understanding of yourself. CAPRICORN (Dec. 22-Jan. 19). You genuinely want to make the world a better place for people, but your methods don’t always project that intent. Let them know that your actions are aimed at the greater good. AQUARIUS (Jan. 20-Feb. 18). You’ll search for the value in interactions, and it shouldn’t be so hard to find. When you click with people and you are where you belong, the value will be glaringly obvi- ous. PISCES (Feb. 19-March 20). Know- ing when you’re in over your head is one thing; admitting it is quite another. With a bit of humility, you’ll attract a teacher who is willing to help you in your quest to make more money. THURSDAY’S BIRTHDAY (Feb. 20). Love embraces you all year. How do you know it’s the right plan for you? As it pulls you along, it seems to reverse the effects of gravity. Your strong choice in March starts a new career trajectory. A magical experience in your personal life in April will escalate a relationship. Your expenses will be paid in August. Taurus and Virgo peo- ple adore you. Your lucky numbers are: 39, 45, 28, 15 and 19.
