The Rain Vacation
Memo:
To: Coastal Lodging Establishments
Subject: Inventing the Rain Vacation
From: Matt Love, self-appointed
expert in rain, author of a
book on rain, and resident of the
Oregon Coast for 17 years.
Photo by Alejandra Ortega
THE PHOTOS
When I approached Astoria High School digital photography teacher Mickey Cereghino in October about the pos-
sibility of collaborating with his students on my rain project, he was incredibly enthusiastic. The students were, too,
especially when they learned that pizza would be their reward. Over the next couple of months, Cereghino’s photog-
raphers began taking shots of rain with the only proviso being: no clichés; show people a new way to look at rain.
Teach about its beauty and metaphors. I joined them on several occasions, and both Cereghino and I contributed our
interpretations. My special thanks to Astoria High School students and their photography teacher. They took some
outstanding pictures, only a few of which made it into this layout. I have no doubt we’ll be collaborating again.
Photo by Matt Love
10 | January 8, 2015 | coastweekend.com
Photo by Sheyanna Fruiht
T
By MATT LOVE
The French symbolist poet Arthur Rimbaud once
wrote in a letter to a friend, “Advance always.” I, for
one, listen to poets and consistently follow Rimbaud’s
advice, particularly with rain. Not long ago, I discov-
ered that some of my best creative energy results when
I advance into rain. I also learned that engaging rain can
nurture entrepreneurial visions that shamelessly enrich
visionaries of rain.
You could be that visionary.
Please take a minute to read this gratuitous memo
Photo by Luke Warnecke
about better monetizing your lodging business. Rain is
the means to grow. Open your mind. Reverse the deluge
to your advantage. Turn gray into gold.
Yes, yes, I know many of you view rain quite dif-
ferently, pejoratively. The bemoaning. The complaining.
All those profane insults, all those dismal vacancy rates
expand your business in liquid, lucrative ways you never
dreamed possible because you never dreamed about rain
before.
You have absolutely nothing to lose
except cliché and the sadly mediocre
notion that rain is only about the weath-
er. Here’s what I advocate: This spring,
offer folks an unprecedented “Rain Va-
cation” on the coast and build a fresh
existential brand for the region that will
surely attract all manner of new visi-
tors during the so-called dead season.
Advance your print, radio, television
and social media marketing right into
rain. Sell rain and sell it hard. In recent
years, I have found that many introspective people crave
rain, enjoy staring silently at its beauty and simplici-
ty and love diving into rain’s metaphors of clarity and
cleansing. They might even live in Southern California
or Arizona. Just gently invite them. Throw in some bar-
gains for wet dogs, too.
In your promotion, play up the blissful isolation, the
wholesome solitude of walking beaches alone during big
scapes and perpetual rain falling sideways into a rolling
black ocean. Too many people spend millions of dollars
to travel where the sun constantly shines and foreign
capital enslaves locals and monkeys to exploit the sun
quintessential coastal rain vacation offers timeless Old
Age wisdom and for a lot less money.
If you do proceed with my proposal, I’d like to offer
some ideas to enhance the Rain Vacation experience.
Construct a clear plastic or glass shelter where a vis-
itor can enjoy watching and listening to
the rain. Maybe put up a hammock.
Provide each visitor a bar of soap
made with rain. (I know of at least one
coastal manufacturer.)
Have guests memorize this rain man-
tra and recite at dinner:
Rain is the means to
grow. Open your mind.
Reverse the deluge to
your advantage. Turn
gray into gold.
ities of seeing gorgeous gray skies, monochrome land-
Rain is born to run; the sun born to
sit in a soft chair. Rain is wanton, excit-
ing; the sun constant, boring. Rain galli-
vants; the sun merely beams. Rain plays
chess and solitaire with you at the same
time. The sun speaks in monologues while rain always
dialogues. Amen.
Hire a house band for your lounge that plays noth-
ing but rain songs and contractually obligate them to
close every show with Credence Clearwater Revival’s
sure the lounge also offers drink specials such as vodka
and rain on the rocks or bourbon neat with a rain chaser.
Set up a sustainable rain collection system so visitors
Photo by Matt Love
Photo by Alex Tallman
can drink and bathe in rainwater.
Stock your DVD library with
a must.
Hold Twister contests in the rain.
The senior citizens will love it!
Create a special rain club for
kids and deck them out in rain swag.
Feel free to poach any of these sug-
gested names: Rain Appreciation
Society, Umbrella Eradication Proj-
ect, Legion of the Rain, Fellowship
of the Rain, The Masters of Rain,
Monochrome Adventure Club, The
Photo by Matt Love
Puddle Smashers, Pale Order of
Rainy Day Gothic Teens.
Please consider my proposal. Rain is our great-
est cultural asset and completely free of charge.
Why not extol and harness it for languid pleasure
for your bold new marketing direction: 1) under no
circumstances should you ever issue any guest an
umbrella no matter how much the weaklings beg;
2) always offer a rain check when the Rain Vacation
craze hits and packs your establishment to the leak-
ing, moldy roof with an entirely new kind of tourist.
One added bonus about them — they’re very, very,
quiet and party in mind only.
Matt Love’s account of one of the rainiest years in Oregon
history, “Of Walking in Rain,” is available at nestuccaspit-
press.com and coastal bookstores. You can also visit
nestuccaspitpress.com to read his blog on rain.
Photo by Mickey Cereghino
Photo by Lucas Caruana
Photo by Henry Meiners
January 8, 2015 | coastweekend.com | 11