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THE DAILY ASTORIAN • WEDNESDAY, JANUARY 7, 2015
Absurd wonders of peninsula life highlighted by 911 summary
By NATALIE ST. JOHN
EO Media Group
PACIFIC
COUNTY,
Wash. — In 2014, some Pacif-
ic County callers didn’t let the
absence of an actual emergen-
cy stop them from asking po-
bus in Nahcotta, an alleged-
ly intoxicated woman “just
peed” in a yard and then lied
down for a rest.
April 25 — In Seaview, a
man allegedly threw a drink
into a car whose passengers
had asked him to move from
the middle of the road.
The same day, a man who
was driving a mobility scoot-
help them deal with minor in-
conveniences, petty disputes,
and silly or bizarre situations.
It is possible that some of
these situations turned out to
be serious, and emergency
managers say that when in
doubt, it’s generally better to
call 911. But if you know your
situation is not an urgent mat-
managers urge you to use the
non-emergency dispatch line:
360-642-9397.
Dispatch Reports are one
of the most popular features
in the Chinook Observer,
even meriting a story in The
New York Times years ago.
This annual summary of the
most eye-catching items isn’t
meant to make light of situ-
ations that callers may have
found genuinely upsetting.
That’s not illegal
Some citizens asked police
to deal with issues that, while
perfectly legal, had offend-
ed their sensibilities. These
included a “suspicious” car
with fogged-up windows, a
stinking manhole, a man who
and a neighbor who raked
leaves at 2:30 in the morning.
Jan. 6 — While investi-
gating a report that an Ilwaco
driver was stealing mail, a
termined that the “thief” was
actually a mail carrier work-
Feb. 12 — A possibly in-
toxicated Ocean Park wom-
an told 911 dispatchers that
there was a “murderer in her
house.” Further questioning
revealed that he was only kill-
ing his liver — the woman
explained that the man “drank
all her beers” and wouldn’t
leave.
Feb. 20 — In Ocean Park,
a man reported that once
again, someone “was burning
smut magazines,” which were
according to a dispatcher’s re-
port. In an effort to help with
the investigation, the caller
saved some of crispy calendar
girls.
May 22 — An Ocean Park
caller complained that “for
weeks now someone has been
playing the same three musi-
cal notes.”
June 25 — A Long Beach
caller said there is a band
playing and “they aren’t that
good.”
Observer file photo
Pacific County law officers see a little bit of everything, as revealed by an annual review of 911 dispatch reports.
Aug. 4 — A caller com-
plained that a shirtless
Seaview pedestrian was
“overweight and bald, acting
strange.”
Sept. 9 — A Long Beach
a resident reported “terrorist
activities,” saying that mu-
sic blaring from the radios of
passing vehicles had the pow-
er to “vibrate him out of bed
and pierce his inner being.”
Animal problems
Rural residents frequently
reported escaped livestock,
neighbors who neglected their
horses, and aggressive dogs
who bit their kids — or their
chickens.
Jan 30 — In Menlo, a “vi-
cious Chihuahua” tried to bite
the tires on the caller’s bicy-
cle.
Feb. 2 — A woman re-
ported that someone stole two
pythons from her Oysterville
home.
Feb. 21 — A Seaview call-
er requested help freeing their
wayward cat from the chim-
ney where it had been stuck,
possibly for two days.
May 1 — A woman asked
if police could help her deal
her Ilwaco home, but later
called them off, after her cat
killed the bat.
May 7 — After killing
all the chickens, two dogs in
Ocean Park reportedly got
stuck inside the coop.
May 21 — Nachotta resi-
dents reported a dispute over a
missing ferret. The ferret was
later recovered.
Aug. 22 — An Ocean park
Navy considers more
sonobuoys off coast
PORTLAND
(AP)
— The U.S. Navy could
number of sonobuoys it
plans to deploy off the Pa-
School.
You kids get off
my lawn!
While people in the unin-
corporated areas the county
had problems with loud, badly
behaved or neglected animals,
people in Long Beach and Il-
waco had the same types of
complaints about kids. Dis-
about rowdy teens, the par-
ents who yelled at them, and
the ever-present menace of
skateboarding youths.
March 13 — Four teen-
agers at the Ilwaco Library
were reportedly “trashing the
place.”
April 26 — A Smith Creek
caller reported a “barn full of
drunken teenagers.”
May 11 — A young girl
on a skateboard and riding
down the middle of the road.
No location given.
July 25 — According to a
Long Beach caller, a “herd of
skateboarders” were “bother-
ing” people.
Aug. 7 — An 11-year-old-
boy allegedly stole a skate-
board with a “voluptuous” In-
dian woman on it. The report
did not specify whether the
Indian woman was a passen-
ger, or a decoration.
Aug. 11 — An Ilwaco call-
er complained that three kids
were engaged in a “marsh-
Police in
Oregon draft
policy for
dealing with
mentally ill
PORTLAND (AP) — Port-
land police have drafted a new
policy for dealing with men-
tally ill people that says some-
surveillance devices are
used in anti-submarine
vironmental assessment
for Northwest training
and testing, the Navy in-
creased the number of
planned sonobuoys from
20 to 720.
They would be in areas
at least 12 miles offshore
from Alaska, Washington,
Oregon and Northern Cal-
ifornia.
The Navy acknowledg-
es that deploying more of
them is likely to harm en-
dangered leatherneck tur-
tles. It’s accepting public
comments until Feb. 2.
In addition to more
buoys, the document also
details additional “mari-
time security operations”
that weren’t reviewed in
the earlier environmental
assessment, possibly in-
cluding escorts for subma-
woman called 911 to ask if it
was legal to shoot coyotes that
were climbing onto her back
porch. Nov. 27 — A sea lion
reportedly showed up on the
walk away if a confrontation
could jeopardize a suspect or
other people.
The policy follows a settle-
ment last summer between the
city and the U.S. Justice Depart-
had a pattern of excessive force
against people who have, or
seem to have, mental illness, The
Oregonian reported Monday.
The policy stresses the im-
Peter Ellis via en.wikipedia
The AN/SSQ-47B is an
‘active’ (pinger) or rang-
er (range measuring) so-
nar sonobuoy.
rines, search-and-seizure
exercises, and anti-piracy
missions.
characteristics of mental illness
and requires them to avoid un-
necessary violence and poten-
tial civil liability.
Portland’s move comes as
other big-city police depart-
ments change their policies
on dealing with the mentally
ill. The Milwaukee Police
Department is stepping up
training so that all police of-
Various states
of undress
Stupid human tricks
A handful of citizens re-
ported bizarre situations that
arose as a result of their own
folly. These included a man
who said that he lost his pick-
up after jumping out of it
during a “wreck,” and a wom-
an who believed she had “ac-
cidentally pulled her mother’s
March 12 — A Grayland
man said his car had been
had “loaned it to a gal to
get beer” and she hadn’t re-
turned.
March 17 — A Seaview
resident accused a woman
of fraud, saying that she had
falsely claimed to be dead.
April 13 — A woman in a
jacket with “JESUS” written
across the back suffered an
apparent lapse of Christian
behavior — a caller report-
ed that she had been seen
casing an Ocean Park home.
The same day, a man who
was hauling a small build-
ing through Ocean Park got
tangled in some low-hanging
power lines and told dispatch-
ers he planned to sue the pow-
er company.
April 27 — After a failed
shoplifting attempt, a woman
allegedly retreated to the re-
stroom of an Ilwaco business
and smeared feces on the wall.
July 26 — A caller at an
people were “trapped in a
shed.”
fully trained to deal with the
mentally ill by 2018, the may-
or announced in December,
months after a Milwaukee
phrenic man at a park.
In deciding how to respond
to a call involving a person suf-
fering a mental health crisis, of-
risk to themselves, the person
who is the subject of the calls
and others, the policy says.
They’re also to evaluate if
Other callers reported citi-
thereof — seemed to signal
trouble. These included calls
about naked pedestrians, a
mother who refused to wear
anything but a blanket, and
multiple reports of an agitated
man in a long green cape.
Dec. 30, 2013 — a caller
at a Seaview business report-
ed a woman who was “un-
dressing” and cursing at other
customers.
Jan. 3 — a caller in Long
Beach reported that a man
who had been smoking meth
was “running around” in his
birthday suit.
Sept. 4 — According to
an Ocean Park caller, a long-
haired man in checkered pa-
jama pants “pulled a gun” on
a family’s dog while riding a
bike around their property.
Sept. 22 — A “completely
nude man was walking a dog”
in Menlo.
Grownups
behaving badly
Many people asked for aid
when someone seemed out of
control. During May, June and
August, 911 callers report-
ed three separate incidents
involving machete-wielding
men. In a separate incident,
a disturbed man injured a
neighbor while brandishing a
sword.
In other cases though, call-
ers appeared to be using 911
as a sort of tattling-hotline.
Feb. 3 — A caller said that
shortly after getting off of the
police involvement is necessary
given that many people with
mental illness or in crisis ar-
en’t dangerous or may behave
dangerously only under certain
circumstances.
“Non-engagement or disen-
gagement are tactics that can be
used if the member determines
that contact or continued con-
tact with the person will result
in an undue safety risk to the
person, the public and/or mem-
bers,” the new policy reads. Of-
at another person as he was
passing by.
May 23 — Around 2 a.m.,
two possibly intoxicated call-
ers threatened each other.
According to the dispatcher’s
report, the caller said he had a
squirt gun.
Sept. 22 — A concerned
citizen in Long Beach told
dispatchers that a woman on a
motorized shopping cart had a
“baby in one arm and anoth-
er small child strapped to her
leg.”
Oct. 6 — A caller reported
that people in a big red truck
were “tossing couches into
the ocean.”
Unsolved mysteries
Finally, some callers re-
ported suspicious incidents so
bizarre that they couldn’t be
explained — or ignored. They
described weird noises, ob-
jects that disappeared, only to
reappear just as mysteriously,
and visitors who tried to harm
them in unusual ways — real
or imagined.
June 13 — An Ocean Park
resident reported a suspicious
situation involving a garage
door that kept “mysteriously
opening.”
Date missing — A woman
said she had heard something
on her porch three different
times. Each time she went to
investigate, the front porch
light was out. Every time she
replaced the bulb, someone
took it.
Aug. 31 — A man said he
had found a binder at a work
site in Ocean Park that was
cluding an ID card for a Rus-
sian woman and a map with
“Bone yard” circled on it.
Dec. 19 — A Long Beach
woman called 911 because
her She believed someone
had stolen her TV remote. A
few minutes later, she called
to let dispatchers knows that
an ambulance — she found
her remote.
that decision in a report.
Among the other options is
delaying taking a person into
custody if police can return at a
safer time.
Also under the new policy,
“mental illness” in the police
database will be purged 10
years after their last known law
enforcement contact.
The bureau is seek-
ing comment on the policy
and other bureau directives
through Jan. 31.
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