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About Keizertimes. (Salem, Or.) 1979-current | View Entire Issue (Nov. 20, 2015)
NOVEMBER 20, 2015, KEIZERTIMES, PAGE A9 CRIST, continued from Page A1 when asked to describe her only son. “He was always smil- ing when not using drugs. Anyone who met him liked him. Any rehab place we took him to, they said he was awe- some. He had a great heart. He was a good kid.” Jeff said Brandon’s charm was apparent to all who got to know him. “All of our friends liked him,” Jeff said. Troubles started in eighth grade. After going to a pri- vate Christian school in Salem previously, Brandon decided to start attending Whiteaker Middle School. “In eighth grade it started with alcohol and pot,” Hol- lie said. “He didn’t feel like he fi t in. He didn’t have a group to gravitate to. The kids who were experimenting (with drugs), he was gravitating to them.” Police reports obtained by the Keizertimes show a his- tory of a young man in trouble with the law, mainly for drugs and behavioral issues, dating back to when Brandon was 13. Things progressed when Brandon entered McNary High School. He started run- ning away and doing other drugs like ecstasy. At age 15 the Crists sent Brandon to a boarding school in Costa Rica. “He was skipping school, running away, being defi ant,” Hollie said. “It was good for a while when he came back. Then it went downhill again. He lied about who he was see- ing. He probably started doing heroin at 17.” Hollie said Brandon even- tually admitted to doing her- oin, cocaine and speedballs, a mixture of the two. “He and his friends wanted to try all the drugs,” Hollie said. “Heroin was the one that hooked him.” Over the course of several years, Brandon was in and out of detox centers. He went to one in Portland three separate times – two weeks each time – but didn’t fi nish the third time. There was a week spent in a Eugene detox center. He got a diploma for completing 45 days at a detox center in Klamath Falls. “The arrest was the best thing that happened to him. We had him back for a year.” — Hollie Crist “He was just a troubled kid,” Jeff said. “I don’t know what to think. He was a good boy before all of this. You nev- er think it will happen to you, or to your kid.” In July 2013 Brandon was arrested by Detective Chris Nelson of the KPD for unlaw- ful possession and delivery of heroin. “Brandon said when Chris Nelson pulled the gun on him and he went to jail for the fi rst time, that’s when he decided to get clean,” Hollie said. “The arrest was the best thing that happened to him. We had him back for a year.” As mentioned in a previous Chasing Dark story, Brandon entered a detox center and then transitioned to a long- term rehab center. He talked with Nelson about once a month. “He showed interest when he got out of the treatment center about talking to kids about the dangers of drug use, particularly heroin, and the devastation it hails on individ- uals and families,” Nelson said. “Brandon fought hard against the dark and evil addiction to heroin. He gave himself a glimpse of freedom and you could hear energy and excite- ment in his voice when he was drug-free. Unfortunately, he relapsed after treatment and the addiction to heroin ended his life.” Hollie also noted the change in her son. “He was clean for 11 months,” she said. “He was pumped about it. He was happy. He was going to be a drug and alcohol counselor. He found a friend in Bend. He was going to live in a youth shelter, then a Sober Living house in Bend.” In an Oxford House, recov- ering addicts live together in transitional housing, support each other and go to Narcotics Anonymous meetings togeth- er. In short, it’s a large support group. “He was always going to meetings,” Jeff said. “He knew exactly how many days he’d been clean.” Suddenly, things fell apart. puzzle answers “We’re not really sure what happened,” Hollie said. “He called, crying and said he was going to move out. He said he was going to have a drink. He was struggling with step four of the recovery, which is com- ing to terms with who you’ve hurt. He moved out but didn’t have a place to live. I think it was to use heroin. I have no idea what happened, no clue. I thought he was doing fi ne.” Brandon came back to Keizer, but continued using drugs. He didn’t want to go to Narcotics Anonymous meet- ings, since he wanted to go to bars with friends. Hollie said it became clear when Brandon was on heroin. “He was negative when us- ing,” Hollie said. “The poor pitiful me thing. Everyone was out to get him. He wasn’t nice. He didn’t smile a lot and was always unhappy. When he was clean he was smiling, happy, outgoing, family oriented. But he missed my birthday and Mother’s Day fi ve years in a row.” In addition, Brandon would come home late, constantly be tired and nodding off. “He alienated himself,” Hollie said. “He was defi nitely nodding off with the heroin. He looked bad. He was very thin, had lost a lot of weight, had dark circles under the eyes. He wouldn’t shower. His nails would be dirty. He used black tar heroin, which would be under his fi ngernails. He was washing his clothes all the time. There was a real person- ality change. They’ll get very defensive when you confront them.” Jeff said parents suspecting drug use need to trust their instincts. “If you think there’s some- thing wrong, there’s some- thing wrong,” Jeff said. “Don’t doubt it.” Hollie said nothing else could have been done to help Brandon. “We tried everything,” she said. “We did everything. He had every opportunity to get clean. The times he went to detox, he just did it for us. It’s an internal thing. It has always been his choice (to get clean). We loved him to death and would have done anything, but it had to be his choice to get clean.” After bouncing between Keizer and the Bend area, Brandon came back to Keiz- er in October 2014. He had trouble fi nding work due to his felony history, but in Sep- tember – just two weeks be- fore his passing – Brandon got a job at a call center. “He told them before being hired about the felony,” Hollie said. “I do human resources, so I told him to tell them right off the bat. They knew about it and they hired him. He was so excited about it. Three days in, he got a tap on the shoul- der and was terminated. He was devastated. I wonder if that’s the excuse for what set him over.” Hollie still feels anger. “I get mad at Brandon for doing it again and for leav- ing me,” she said. “I know he wouldn’t want me to see him using. I’m mad at myself for not catching it. I’m mad at myself and at him.” “If you think there’s something wrong, there’s something wrong. Don’t doubt it.” — Jeff Crist Hollie said her son didn’t want to be remembered for his addiction. “He never wanted to be known as a junkie,” Hollie said. “He would hate that. But that’s how people are remem- bering him. He would just be devastated. He had a lot of shame and guilt in being an addict. “He was the addict,” she added later. “He chose to do it. He couldn’t get out of it. It’s a disease. People don’t choose to get cancer, but he chose to do drugs. I don’t think he knew what he was getting himself into.” The pain can be felt in Brandon’s obituary, which in- cludes this line: “Brandon put up a good fi ght with his addic- tion, but sadly lost the battle. He is fi nally at peace and will be deeply missed.” Hollie recalled one Christ- mas gift from Brandon. “He had stolen our camera,” Hollie said. “So he brought us a camera, which he’d probably stolen from someone. It was just a box and a camera, noth- ing else. I know he had guilt about stealing. He wasn’t steal- ing, it was the drugs. He would rather sell drugs than get mon- ey from stealing things.” Now it’s Jeff and Hollie thinking about their son’s life being stolen away. “A lot of friends have helped us through it,” Jeff said. “I think about it every day. I’ll drive somewhere and I’ll re- member Brandon. It could be places we would go, or I’ll see a white van. I think about it every day, all the time.” Hollie still hasn’t complete- ly processed the loss of her son. “I’m more numb still,” she said. “I sleep with his coat. We haven’t touched anything in his room. He was the love of my life. I just adored him. I told him I would lay down in the road and die for him in order for him to be clean. That drug just got him really bad. It’s just the most awful thing ever.” At Brandon’s memorial ser- vice, a mom wrote in the ser- vice book her son was going down the same path Brandon had. She asked for Hollie to call her. Hollie tearfully said last week she hasn’t made the call yet. “Right now I don’t know how to help somebody,” Hol- lie said. “I didn’t even know how to help my own son. We did everything we possibly could. I hope this story helps one kid. That’s what Brandon would have wanted. His mes- sage would have been don’t ever start.” Ideally, Hollie would love for more than one addict to be saved after hearing Brandon’s story. But even if that hap- pened, it wouldn’t replace the hole in her life. “It would feel good, but it wouldn’t make his death any easier,” she said.