Eugene weekly., June 29, 2017, Page 34, Image 34

FREE WILL
ASTROLOGY
BY R O B B R E Z S N Y
ARIES (March 21-April 19): This is a perfect moment to create a new tradition, Aries. You intuitively know how to
turn one of your recent breakthroughs into a good habit that will provide continuity and stability for a long time
to come. You can make a permanent upgrade in your life by capitalizing on an accidental discovery you made
during a spontaneous episode. It’s time, in other words, to convert the temporary assistance you received into a
long-term asset; to use a stroke of luck to foster a lasting pleasure.
TAURUS (April 20-May 20): Physicist Freeman Dyson told Wired magazine how crucial it is to learn from
failures. As an example, he described the invention of the bicycle. “There were thousands of weird models built
and tried before they found the one that really worked,” he said. “You could never design a bicycle theoretically.
Even now, it’s difficult to understand why a bicycle works. But just by trial and error, we found out how to do it,
and the error was essential.” I hope you will keep that in mind, Taurus. It’s the Success-Through-Failure Phase of
your astrological cycle.
GEMINI (May 21-June 20): According to my analysis of the astrological omens, you should lease a chauf-
feured stretch limousine with nine TVs and a hot tub inside. You’d also be smart to accessorize your smooth
ride with a $5,000-bottle of Château Le Pin Pomerol Red Bordeaux wine and servings of the Golden Opulence
Sundae, which features a topping of 24-karat edible gold and sprinkles of Amedei Porcelana, the most expensive
chocolate in the world. If none of that is possible, do the next best thing, which is to mastermind a long-term plan
to bring more money into your life. From an astrological perspective, wealth-building activities will be favored in
the coming weeks.
I Saw You
I T ’ S F R E E T O P L AC E A N I S AW YO U ! E M A I L : I S AW YO U @ E U G E N E W E E K LY.C O M
HEY NSNK!
CANCER (June 21-July 22): When Leos rise above their habit selves and seize the authority to be rigorously
authentic, I refer to them as Sun Queens or Sun Kings. When you Cancerians do the same — triumph over your
conditioning and become masters of your own destiny — I call you Moon Queens or Moon Kings. In the coming
weeks, I suspect that many of you will make big strides towards earning this title. Why? Because you’re on the
verge of claiming more of the “soft power,” the potent sensitivity, that enables you to feel at home no matter
what you’re doing or where you are on this planet.
TO MY GAL (EX)
DONATIONS FOR WHITE BIRD
I saw you eating a burger in an alley, and
thought you were the one.
Now there is no one, thank you for the time
you pretended to care for me.
See you when you decide I can.
Your (ex) BO
Still being accepted at the EW Office.
Hygiene products needed.
Thank you to those who have given!
I S AW YOU
Ever been showered with pillows?
But not in a condescending kinda way? :-)
POSTED LIMIT
Road up to Friendly Lake and the forest has
a wild stretch. Free of bad traffic. Two nar-
rowings close together. Know it? Some
days, I go that way.
TO THE MAN IN THE RED TRUCK,
from the woman in the blue jeep ... we
chatted at the intersection by Oakway
Center. Would you like to chat over coffee ?
LEO (July 23-Aug. 22): You may not realize it, but you now have a remarkable power to perform magic tricks. I’m
not talking about Houdini-style hocus-pocus. I’m referring to practical wizardry that will enable you to make rel-
atively efficient transformations in your daily life. Here are some of the possibilities: wiggling out of a tight spot
without offending anyone; conjuring up a new opportunity for yourself out of thin air; doing well on a test even
though you don’t feel prepared for it; converting a seemingly tough twist of fate into a fertile date with destiny.
How else would you like to use your magic?
Every BODY
deserves expert,
confi dential care.
VIRGO (Aug. 23-Sept. 22): Feminist pioneer and author Gloria Steinem said, “Writing is the only thing that,
when I do it, I don’t feel I should be doing something else.” Is there such an activity for you, Virgo? If not, now is
a favorable time to identify what it is. And if there is indeed such a passionate pursuit, you should do it as much
as possible in the coming weeks. You’re primed for a breakthrough in your relationship with this life-giving joy.
To evolve to the next phase of its power to inspire you, it needs as much of your love and intelligence as you can
spare.
LIBRA (Sept. 23-Oct. 22): One of the 21st century’s most entertaining archaeological events was the discovery
of King Richard III’s bones. The English monarch died in 1485, but his burial site had long been a mystery. It
wasn’t an archaeologist who tracked down his remains, but a screenwriter named Philippa Langley. She did ex-
tensive historical research, narrowing down the possibilities to a car park in Leicester. As she wandered around
there, she got a psychic impression at one point that she was walking directly over Richard’s grave. Her feeling
later turned out to be right. I suspect your near future will have resemblances to her adventure. You’ll have suc-
cess in a mode that’s not your official area of expertise. Sharp analytical thinking will lead you to the brink, and a
less rational twist of intelligence will take you the rest of the way.
SCORPIO (Oct. 23-Nov. 21): The tides of destiny are no longer just whispering their message for you. They are
shouting. And what they are shouting is that your brave quest must begin soon. There can be no further excuses
for postponement. What’s that you say? You don’t have the luxury of embarking on a brave quest? You’re too
bogged down in the thousand and one details of managing the day-to-day hubbub? Well, in case you need
reminding, the tides of destiny are not in the habit of making things convenient. And if you don’t cooperate will-
ingly, they will ultimately compel you to do so. But now here’s the really good news, Scorpio: The tides of destiny
will make available at least one burst of assistance that you can’t imagine right now.
SAGITTARIUS (Nov. 22-Dec. 21): In my dream, I used the non-itchy wool of the queen’s special Merino sheep
to weave an enchanted blanket for you. I wanted this blanket to be a good luck charm you could use in your cru-
sade to achieve deeper levels of romantic intimacy. In its tapestry I spun scenes depicting the most love-filled
events from your past. It was beautiful and perfect. But after I finished it, I had second thoughts about giving it to
you. Wasn’t it a mistake to make it so flawless? Shouldn’t it also embody the messier aspects of togetherness?
To turn it into a better symbol and therefore a more dynamic talisman, I spilled wine on one corner of it and
unraveled some threads in another corner. Now here’s my interpretation of my dream: You’re ready to regard
messiness as an essential ingredient in your quest for deeper intimacy.
CAPRICORN (Dec. 22-Jan. 19): Your word of power is “supplication” — the act of asking earnestly and
humbly for what you want. When practiced correctly, “supplication” is indeed a sign of potency, not of weakness.
It means you are totally united with your desire, feel no guilt or shyness about it and intend to express it with
liberated abandon. Supplication makes you supple, poised to be flexible as you do what’s necessary to get the
blessing you yearn for. Being a supplicant also makes you smarter, because it helps you realize that you can’t
get what you want on the strength of your willful ego alone. You need grace, luck and help from sources beyond
your control.
AQUARIUS (Jan. 20-Feb. 18): In the coming weeks, your relationships with painkillers will be extra sweet and
intense. Please note that I’m not talking about ibuprofen or acetaminophen or aspirin. My reference to painkillers
is metaphorical. What I’m predicting is that you will have a knack for finding experiences that reduce your
suffering. You’ll have a sixth sense about where to go to get the most meaningful kinds of healing and relief. Your
intuition will guide you to initiate acts of atonement and forgiveness, which will in turn ameliorate your wounds.
PISCES (Feb. 19-March 20): Don’t wait around passively as you fantasize about becoming the “Chosen One” of
some person or group or institution. Be your own Chosen One. And don’t wander around aimlessly, biding your
time in the hope of eventually being awarded some prize or boon by a prestigious source. Give yourself a prize or
boon. Here’s one further piece of advice, Pisces: Don’t postpone your practical and proactive intentions until the
mythical “perfect moment” arrives. Create your own perfect moment.
HOMEWORK: Name your greatest unnecessary taboo and how you would violate it if doing so didn’t hurt
anyone. FreeWillAstrology.com.
LONG HAIRED MAN
I thought you were pretty cute.
I didn't ask for your number, because you
were with friends and I thought it'd be
rude.
I regret it now.
You or a family member may qualify for the
Oregon Health Plan (OHP)
A family of four earning up to $2,829 a month
may qualify for adult coverage.
Birth Control • Vasectomies
STD Testing & Treatment
Emergency Contraceptives
For FREE OHP application assistance,
call 541-543-5484
MAKE AN APPOINTMENT TODAY
ppsworegon.org
800-230-PLAN
Accepting most
insurances!
GO TO REALASTROLOGY.COM
30
June 29, 2017 • eugeneweekly.com
expe
confi
care.
ANALOG
BARBERSHOP
•
P
t
•
B
•
S
t
•
E
c
WA LK-INS A LWAYS
O P E N 7 DAYS
•
A
e
MAKE AN
APPOINTMENT TODAY
ppsworegon.org
800-230-PLAN
860 OLIVE ST. IN EUGEN E
(541) 510-5668
Sweet Illusions
Nude Hours 12pm-2:15am Daily
LOTTERY • CHAMPAGNE ROOM
OUTSIDE SMOKING • DRINKING PATIO
DANCERS AUDITION
Call 541-517-7196
www.sweetillusions.biz
1836 South ‘A’ St., Spfl d • 541-762-1503
Only 5 minutes from campus
(Franklin Blvd turns into South A St.)
CHECK OUT EXPANDED WEEKLY AUDIO HOROSCOPES AND DAILY TEXT MESSAGE HOROSCOPES.
WE
@EUGENEWEEKLY