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About Eugene weekly. (Eugene, Oregon) 1993-current | View Entire Issue (May 5, 2016)
FREE WILL ASTROLOGY BY R O B B R E Z S N Y ARIES (March 21-April 19): “Silence is not silence, but a limit of hearing,” writes Jane Hirshfield in her poem “Ev- erything Has Two Endings.” This observation is apropos for you right now. There are potentially important messages you’re not registering and catalytic influences you can’t detect. But their apparent absence is due to a blank spot in your awareness, or maybe a willful ignorance left over from the old days. Now here’s the good news: You are primed to expand your listening field. You have an enhanced ability to open certain doors of perception that have been closed. If you capitalize on this opportunity, silence will give way to revelation. TAURUS (April 20-May 20): Your ability to accomplish magic is at a peak, and will continue to soar for at least two more weeks. And when I use that word “magic,” I’m not referring to the hocus-pocus performed by illusionists like Criss Angel or Harry Houdini. I’m talking about real feats of transformation that will generate practical benefits in your day-to-day life. Now study the following definitions by writer Somerset Maugham, and have faith in your abil- ity to embody them: “Magic is no more than the art of employing consciously invisible means to produce visible effects. Will, love, and imagination are magic powers that everyone possesses; and whoever knows how to develop them to their fullest extent is a magician.” GEMINI (May 21-June 20): According to author Vladimir Nabokov, the Russian word toska means “a dull ache of the soul, a longing with nothing to long for, a sick pining, a vague restlessness.” Linguist Anna Wierzbicka says it conveys an emotion that blends melancholy, boredom, and yearning. Journalist Nick Ashdown suggests that for someone experiencing toska, the thing that’s yearned for may be “intangible and impossible to actually obtain.” How are doing with your own toska, Gemini? Is it conceivable that you could escape it — maybe even heal it? I think you can. I think you will. Before you do, though, I hope you’ll take time to explore it further. Toska has more to teach you about the previously hidden meaning of your life. CANCER (June 21-July 22): “Gandhi’s autobiography is on my pillow,” writes Cancerian poet Buddy Wakefield. “I put it there every morning after making my bed so I’ll remember to read it before falling asleep. I’ve been reading it for 6 years. I’m on Chapter 2.” What’s the equivalent phenomenon in your world, my fellow Crab? What good deed or righteous activity have you been pursuing with glacial diligence? Is there a healthy change you’ve been thinking about forever, but not making much progress on? The mood and the sway of the coming days will bring you a good chance to expedite the process. In Wakefield’s case, he could get up to Chapter 17. I Saw You I T ’ S F R E E T O P L AC E A N I S AW YO U ! E M A I L : I S AW YO U @ E U G E N E W E E K LY.C O M D AT I N G S E R V I C E S *A PLEASANT SURPRISE* Sensuality? Foot Fetish? Soft skin, great scent, pretty feet & the perfect touch. Attractive, slow hand, classy & attentive. Awaiting your call. 541-870-6127 Tia. Gladly travel. Professional men only. No blocked calls. Notice Appreciated LIBRA (Sept. 23-Oct. 22): On Cracked.com, Auntie Meme tells us that many commonly-held ideas about history are wrong. There were no such things as chastity belts in the Middle Ages, for example. Napoleon’s soldiers didn’t shoot off the nose of the Sphinx when they were stationed in Egypt. In regards to starving peasants, Marie Antoi- nette never derisively said, “Let them eat cake.” And no Christians ever became meals for lions in ancient Rome’s Colosseum. (More: tinyurl.com/historicaljive.) In the spirit of Auntie Meme’s exposé, and in alignment with the astrological omens, I invite you to uncover and correct at least three fabrications, fables, and lies about your own past. SCORPIO (Oct. 23-Nov. 21): Poet Charles Wright marvels at the hummingbird, “who has to eat sixty times his own weight a day just to stay alive. Now that’s a life on the edge.” In the coming weeks, Scorpio, your modus operandi may have resemblances to the hummingbird’s approach. I don’t mean to suggest that you will be in a manic survival mode. Rather, I expect you’ll feel called to nourish your soul with more intensity than usual. You’ll need to continuously fill yourself up with experiences that inspire, teach, and transform you. SAGITTARIUS (Nov. 22-Dec. 21): “Anybody can become angry,” said Greek philosopher Aristotle. “That is easy; IRVFEST You were there, magical and beautiful. Will you be at the Garden Party? BABY BEAR I saw you as the most beautiful woman in the world! You are my Boo Boo. You are my soul mate. I hope that you start feeling bet- ter. I would still do Anything for you. White Dental I last saw you when we wrecked Feb 11 on Hwy 126, Veneta. Losing you is far worse than my leg. Your smile to me is more pow- erful than any medicine. Love, Mega. SMOKEY THE BEAR I did not hug you at the Cottage Grove Earth Day because of your uniform. The USFS is for logging old growth at Trapper, Goose and Quartz projects. Those humans are not your friends and bears don’t wear pants! Come back to the Woods! Love, The Lorax Bird Clinic 541-344-8302 • 1400 Mill st, Eugene EMERGENCY & ON-GOING DENTISTRY for Low/No income residents of Lane County Accepts OHP +Under Insured Healing Massage but to be angry with the right person, and to the right degree, and at the right time, for the right purpose, and in the right way, that is not within everybody’s power and is not easy.” I’m pleased to inform you, Sagittarius, that now is a time when you have an exceptional capacity for meeting Aristotle’s high standards. In fact, I encourage you to honor and learn all you can from your finely-honed and well-expressed anger. Make it work wonders for you. Use it so constructively that no one can complain. DeepTissue•Swedish•TriggerPoint MyofascialRelease•EssentialOils CAPRICORN (Dec. 22-Jan. 19): To celebrate your arrival at the height of your sex appeal, I’m resurrecting the old-fashioned word “vavoom.” Feel free to use it as your nickname. Pepper it into your conversations in place of terms like “awesome,” “wow,” or “yikes.” Use a felt-tip marker to make a temporary VAVOOM tattoo on your beautiful body. Here are other enchanted words you should take charge of and make an intimate part of your daily presenta- tion: verve, vim, vivid, vitality, vigor, voracious, vivacious, visceral, valor, victory, and VIVA! NationallyCertified LIC.#8250 AQUARIUS (Jan. 20-Feb. 18): When he was a boy, Mayan poet Humberto Ak’ab’al asked his mother, “What are those things that shine in the sky?” “Bees,” she answered mischievously. “Every night since then,” Humberto writes, “my eyes eat honey.” In response to this lyrical play, the logical part of our brains might rise up and say, “What a load of nonsense!” But I will ask you to set aside the logical part of your brain for now, Aquarius. According to my understanding of the astrological omens, the coming days will be a time when you need a big dose of sweet fantasies, dreamy stories, and maybe even beautiful nonsense. What are your equivalents of seeing bees making honey in the night sky’s pinpoints of light? PISCES (Feb. 19-March 20): “Sometimes, a seemingly insignificant detail reveals a whole world,” says artist Pierre Cordier. “Like the messages hidden by spies in the dot of an i.” These are precisely the minutiae that you should be extra alert for in the coming days, Pisces. Major revelations may emerge from what at first seems trivial. Generous insights could ignite in response to small acts of beauty and subtle shifts of tone. Do you want glimpses of the big picture and the long-range future? Then be reverent toward the fine points and modest specifics. HOMEWORK: Thousands of amazing, inexplicable, even miraculous events occur every day. Report yours: bit.ly/Amazement GO TO REALASTROLOGY.COM CHECK OUT EXPANDED WEEKLY AUDIO HOROSCOPES AND DAILY TEXT MESSAGE HOROSCOPES. 38 THERE IS GRAVITY In every situation. One drop too many too much. A place where rise occurs. Maybe there hearts meet. You know. Like water filling every crevice in a landscape. I let my thoughts dwell on nothing. For I feel a rhythm and it assures me. Drip. drip. drip. Heavy thick sweet. Syrupy like honey. Soft soothing steady. Til I breathe you. PROPERLY AWAITING. I S AW YOU LEO (July 23-Aug. 22): In the 16th century, European explorers searched South America in quest of a mythical city of gold known as El Dorado. Tibetan Buddhist tradition speaks of Shambhala, a magical holy kingdom where only enlightened beings live. In the legends of ancient Greece, Hyperborea was a sunny paradise where the average human life span was a thousand years and happiness was normal. Now is an excellent time for you to fantasize about your own version of utopia, Leo. Why? First, your imagination is primed to expand. Second, dreaming big will be good for your mental and physical health. There’s another reason, too: By envisioning the most beautiful world possible, you will mobilize your idealism and boost your ability to create the best life for yourself in the coming months. VIRGO (Aug. 23-Sept. 22): “Anytime you’re going to grow, you’re going to lose something,” said psychologist James Hillman. “You’re losing what you’re hanging onto to keep safe. You’re losing habits that you’re comfortable with, you’re losing familiarity.” I nominate these thoughts to serve as your words of wisdom in the coming weeks, Virgo. From an astrological perspective, you are in a phase when luxuriant growth is possible. To harvest the full- ness of the lush opportunities, you should be willing to shed outworn stuff that might interfere. GRAFT Come root The soil is fine; enriched, deep, perfect for planting. SPADE May 5, 2016 • eugeneweekly.com Lucia McKelvey , LMT 541.683.3286 Days,Evenings,Weekends 439 W 2nd Ave - Taekwondo - Hatha Yoga - Zen Yoga & Meditation - Yoga & Ayurveda - Bo Yoga - Capoeira - Integrated Martial Arts - Kids Classes All classes $10 or less. corestarcenter.com WIGGLY TAILS DOG RESCUE Helping abandoned and surrendered dogs fi nd their forever homes Rocky is a sweet senior Chihuahua looking for his forever home! He’s 9yrs old and about 11lbs. He would be a great companion for an older person. He gets along with other dogs, but would be best in a home with just one other dog his size. He would love a lap, a warm bed to snuggle up in and someone to take him for daily walks. His adoption fee is waived, but an adoption app and home visit are required. Let us know if you’d like to bring Rocky into your life! Foster homes & volunteers are always needed! Please contact us through our Facebook page. www.facebook.com/WigglyTailsDogRescue Hi folks! My name is Snookie and I am super psyched to inform you that this weekend, May 7th & 8th (10-5) is the Mother’s Day Plant & Artisan Sale at S.A.R.A.’s Treasures! OUR ENTIRE PARKING LOT WILL BE FILLED WITH COLORFUL, LOCAL PLANTS AND GREAT MOTHER’S DAY GIFTS! Tons of organic vegetable & herb starts, perennials, butterfl y/hummingbird attracting plants, hanging baskets, hand-crafted artisan items, garden art, gift plants, garden supplies, and more! The best part is that all proceeds from this event benefi t S.A.R.A.’s life-saving mission to rescue, assist, and advocate for shelter animals. 871 River Road • 607-8892 • Open Everyday 10-6 www.sarastreasures.org
