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About Eugene weekly. (Eugene, Oregon) 1993-current | View Entire Issue (Jan. 8, 2015)
Bloody Hell I Alternative period products for the adventurous among us BY AMY SCHNEIDER t has always struck me as one of the great injustices Carolyn Moore, a nurse practitioner at of womanhood — the monthly bloodbath from a body Planned Parenthood of Southwestern Oregon, part that is normally reserved for sexytime (not a baby says, “Most women who use menstrual cups corridor just yet, thank you very much). I try to tell really like them. They’re safe, effective and myself that it’s some great honor, an ancient rite of earth-friendly.” femininity that brings me closer to nature and the goddess The Diva Cup is one of the more popular within us all. brands, and the colorful packaging distracts But that kind of bullshit isn’t terribly reassuring when you from the fact that this device is basically you’ve bled through your pants and flushed your last a leak bucket for blood. To use it, simply tampon down the toilet. squeeze the cup between your fingers so that According to BuzzFeed’s “How Metal Is Your Period?” it folds shut, then wedge it in. The cup should online quiz, my period is “very expand once inside. fucking metal.” I consider this a A few tips from fine achievement. But to obtain friends about using According to BuzzFeed’s a perfect score and prove that this thing: Make ‘How Metal Is Your Period?’ my period is indeed the most sure to push it hardcore of periods, I needed up far enough to online quiz, my period is ‘very to upgrade my menstruation prevent leaking. fucking metal.’ I consider this supplies, from paltry tampons It’s not pretty when and maxi pads to reusable the deluge hits and a fine achievement. menstrual cups and sea sponges. you’re not ready. Yes, you read that right: sea Also, be careful sponges. when using the cup But I’ll get back to that later. First, let’s talk about the in public restrooms. Getting it in and out is a bit tricky and menstrual cup, which, according to Planned Parenthood, messier than dropping a tampon into the toilet, so plan is “an easy-to-use, safe and ecofriendly alternative to pads ahead. It’s probably not yet socially acceptable to wash out and tampons.” Their brand, Lunette, is a light blue, acorn- your menstrual cup in a public restroom sink, bloody hands shaped silicone cup, flexible enough to accommodate the and all — dumping your cup out in the toilet and rinsing it wriggling it takes to place it correctly. with a bottle of water might be the way to go. If the Diva Cup doesn’t appeal to you, a quick web search shows that there’s also the Mooncup, Lily Cup, Fleurcup and MeLuna. I’m not really into all the references to lunar cycles and phases of the moon. I’m not sure why a woman’s baby- making system has anything to do with a giant chunk of rock that orbits our planet. Then again, I do see the appeal in envisioning oneself as some kind of primal, badass she-wolf. In any case, if allusions to heavenly bodies aren’t your thing, people have mined the depths of the ocean to find absorptive materials. Sea sponges like Sea Pearls function just about as you’d imagine: Boil to clean, push it on in, remove when full, wring out in sink, rinse, repeat. I found the Diva Cup and Sea Pearls at The Kiva, but you can get them online and at other establishments around town with an eco, womanly hippie ethos. Just try not to imagine sticking SpongeBob SquarePants in your lady business, and you’ll be fine. ■ BE HEALTHY BE IN MOTION For overall fitness of mind and body, nothing beats a refreshing paddle workout. With Oregon Paddle Sports’ full line of rafts, canoes, kayaks, and stand up paddleboards, you can choose which way you want to go. We also have all the accessories, quality gear and solid paddling know-how to help get you out on the water in no time. 520 Commercial Street, Suite K | Eugene, OR 97402 541-505-9020 | www.oregonpaddlesports.com | ops@whitewaterdesigns.com RAFTS • CANOES • KAYAKS • SUPs 14 January 8, 2015 • eugeneweekly.com
