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About Eugene weekly. (Eugene, Oregon) 1993-current | View Entire Issue (June 6, 2013)
B LOVE N OW FR EE! E U G E N E W E E K LY ’ S L O C A L D AT I N G S I T E MEMB W I N K- K I N K . C O M E R S H IP SAVAGE S W O R D S O F W I S D O M BY DA N S AVAG E I love my husband of 20 years, but our sexual differences are putting a strain on our marriage. Ten years ago, he asked me to talk dirty to him about having sex with other men. It has progressed to him wanting to be a cuckold. I only want to be with him, but he presses the issue by verbalizing cuckold situations during sex. This makes me close my eyes and shut down. By the time he is done, I have no desire to orgasm because I no longer feel attractive. Worse, I feel like I am not enough for him. The only way he can get off is to talk about, think about, or hear me talk about having sex with other men. It makes me feel worthless as a sex partner — which is crazy, because I am attractive and open to a great deal of things (toys, games, dressing up, striptease, etc.). I long for him to touch me, kiss me, and look at me the way he used to. He is a good father and a good provider, and I love him. But this matter is crushing my self-esteem. I won’t stay much longer if this continues. Extremely Frustrated Female Experiencing Despair YOU TO SUBMISSIVE READY TO FUCK I need very badly an 21-35 year urological/ psychiatric/marriage part/travel mate immediately. my privates needs a lot of sexual attention sometime almost in public other unorthodox sexual therapy. Need immediate answers. catmale62, 61 New to Eugene and really am just lookin for some NSA great sex. billybadass, 30 WOMEN SEEK ING MEN WILDHORSE NEEDS TAMING Are you the man to do it? I need a steady hand, feisty mind, creative imagination, wanton desire, yet ability to assert your control over me and keep it there. DeservingIt, 46, g HOT BI SLUT Hot young blonde lookin for fun in all shapes, sizes, sexes, etc.. Love drugs and sex. Hmu for pure fun! NikkiW1111, 22, MULTI-ORGASMIC PLEASURE I am a highly sexual, attractive man who is well equipped and has a talented tongue. I love to be please. I love to explore and have always been clean. curious97322, 38 g MEN SEEK ING ? COME FIND ME I am pretty open minded and willing to try most things at least once. Bi guy looking for whatever comes my way, Don’t be shy. BigFunGuy, 31, g SKANKIN ROMANTIC having sex in the forest or in public, if you can’t get arrested for it then what’s the fun. Open to any lady who isn’t a cop, landlord, or politician. toadallyawesome666, 27, g WOMEN SEEK ING ? THAT’S MZBITCH Dominant woman interested in submissive man, woman or couple for discrete play. I adore pain sluts but abhor brats. Be real, be truthful, or be on your way. MzBitch, 47, g WILLING Submissive easy going respectful single male seeking height. Weight porportion dominate female for serious relationship. Alberta, 56 SEXY FUN PUNK Looking for new tricks in the bed I love being rough And making sure both sides get to cum ;). Monoxide, 21, g MEN SEEK ING WOMEN ORAL EXPERT Looking for someone who enjoys having her pussy lick till she cums.who can ride my cock while i play with here ass. An who likes being riding from behind. budman, 51, g COUPLES DISCRETION & RESPECT Few people I meet are deemed worthy to enter my private life, but those few are rewarded with open acceptance, respect, loyalty, fierce protection, intense passion, and intoxicating sensuality. Kalrazard, 33 WATCHER’S, BBQ PARTIE’S Husband and I are seeking year around friend’s over 40. We like to watch our friend’s have sex while We have sex. We host nude BBQs as well. moanbone, 53, g I am a 28-year-old married straight male. I have a lot of confusion regarding my sexual orientation and gender identity, and I am in therapy. My question for you is about my current self-pleasuring routine. I get high and watch “sissy self-hypnosis” videos. These videos consist of text, pictures, and subliminal suggestions aimed at hypnotizing straight males into some kind of “mind control” sex slavery. Some are about cuckolding and femdom; some are about being brainwashed into sucking cock. It is all done in a really amateurish and (hopefully) ineffective way. Am I destroying my brain here? Man Wondering About Hypnosis THICK COCK READY Im here to explore your body inside and out im real as it gets I got a big cock and know how to use it :-) lets have some fun. Bigcockstud88, 24 TAN BLOND FIT 420 LOVES LICK;P im free looking for just sex maybe start with a drink or something and go from there or tell me what works for you... blonde1989_, 23 Im 25 lookin for what comes at me single and want to mingle(:. stant8822, 25, g Enjoy Commercial Free Television www.ctv29.org Frances waxing specialist 541-510-5773 there’s nothing I can’t wax barebodywaxingstudio.com SATISFY YOUR FANTASIES! NUDE HOURS DAILY NOON TO 2:15 AM NO COVER DANCER AUDITIONS CALL 541-517-7196 MON/WED $15 TABLE DANCES NO COVER 1836 S. A Street • Springfield • 541-762-1503 NEW RELEASE DVDS ON SALE TAKE $5 OFF & RECEIVE A FREE PROMO DVD LGBT Pride Month, ROCK YOUR RAINBOW FOR 5% OFF. June is Gay Pride Month; to celebrate we are offering a 5% discount to anyone wearing rainbow pride. It can be a shirt, bracelet, hat, purse, shoe laces etc. Your husband was probably reading cuckolding blogs for years before he worked up the nerve to raise the subject, EFFED, and here’s what he’s gleaned: husband brings it up, wife shoots it down, hus- band whines, wife agrees to explore it as fantasy only, and then one day — after months or years of dirty talk — wife announces she wants to give it a try. She winds up loving it, she says she regrets waiting so long, and husband lives happily ever after in cuckolded bliss. Reading so many cuckolding success stories — many likely fi ctitious — has left your husband convinced that if he just keeps at it, one day his wife will want to try it. (Some wives do try it and like it. I got a letter from a woman who’s angry that her husband — after years of dirty talk and a half-dozen cuckolding experiences — has decided that it isn’t for him after all. He doesn’t want her sleeping with other men; she doesn’t want to go back to sleeping with just him. Dr. Cuckenstein created a monster.) Tell your husband in no uncertain terms that you don’t want to hear about cuckolding anymore. Pe- riod. He is free to think about whatever he wants to during sex — we all are — but he has to keep his cuckolding fantasies to himself. Wrap up the convo by informing him that from now on, your sex ses- sions end the moment the subject of you sleeping with other men is raised. No more closing your eyes and waiting for him to fi nish. (And what kind of asshole can fi nish under those circumstances?) If he brings up other men, EFFED, get off the bed, get out of the bedroom, and go to the kitchen and have some ice cream. Your husband needs to fi nd a new erotic script that works for you both. The incentive for him: Since you are open to many things — toys, games, dressing up, striptease — a fantasy sce- nario that turns you on is likely to become a reality scenario pretty quickly. Finally, EFFED, cuckolds don’t see their wives as unattractive. Cuckolds see their wives as so de- sirable — and so insatiable — that they’re incapable of giving their wives all of the sexual attention they deserve. But I can see why you’re upset. You want sex to be about the two of you, about the intimacy you share (or used to share), and your inconsiderate husband is always running his mouth about people who aren’t in the room. It’s understandable that you would feel like you’re not enough for him after 10 years of this bullshit. But your husband’s cuckolding fantasies don’t mean he fi nds you unattractive — they mean the exact opposite. FREE GIFT W/ PURCHASE OF $75 OR MORE OF JIMMY JANE PRODUCTS Adult Shop 290 River Rd | 86784 Franklin Blvd | 720 Garfield www.e-adultshop.com - 541.636.3203 I haven’t encountered any glassy-eyed straight guys wandering around my gay neighborhood of- fering to suck cock, so I’m thinking these videos are ineffective. They sound like a harmless way for an otherwise healthy, stable straight guy to fantasize about ceding his power and privilege to people the culture taught him to regard as weak and inferior, i.e., women and fags. That said, MWAH, it doesn’t sound like you’re an otherwise healthy, stable straight guy. You’re confused about your sexual ori- entation and gender identity, and you’re working on those issues with a shrink. That being the case, MWAH, I think you might wanna avoid these videos for the time being. I always told myself that I would forgive my husband if he cheated on me. Well, he had an affair for eight months. He also blew through our savings and racked up considerable credit-card debt. The college fund we started for our two children is gone. He spent all of the money on fancy dinners, expensive gifts, and incredible vacations for his girlfriend. I am so angry, I can’t imagine staying. My husband ended the affair and wants desperately to save our marriage. As much as it pains me to subject my kids to divorce, I don’t know if I can commit to him again. Is the best option to DTMFA? Heartbroken Sexual infi delity is one thing — and it’s a relatively common thing (so people should go into marriage prepared to work through it) — but we’re not talking about one thing here. We’re talking about a whole series of betrayals. Your husband betrayed you sexually and fi nancially. He stole from you. He stole from his own children. Now, I can understand thinking with your dick (because I have a dick), and we can all imagine a cir- cumstance in which we might succumb to temptation (because we all experience temptation). But I cannot even begin to wrap my head around how someone could spend his own children’s college fund — in addition to his family’s savings (and taking on debt!) — on gifts, trips, and meals for his piece-of- shit on the side. (Not all “other women” are pieces of shit, but anyone who would allow her married lover to spend that kind of money on her in eight months is a fl aming piece of shit.) DTMFA. It’s advice, H, not binding arbitration. You are free to make up your own mind. And while I couldn’t see staying if I were in your shoes, I could see myself meeting with a marriage counselor a few times before pulling the plug — for the sake of the kids. This week on the Savage Lovecast, Dan reveals the secret of how to get straight women to dive into casual sex, and Lindy West talks about men who think your vagina is disgusting: savagelovecast.com. Dan’s new book — American Savage: Insights, Slights, and Fights on Faith, Sex, Love, and Politics — is available now. FIND THE SAVAGE LOVECAST MY WEEKLY PODCAST EVERY TUESDAY AT THESTRANGER.COM/SAVAGE eugeneweekly.com • June 6, 2013 63
