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GIFT OF LETTUCE
SHY AND GEEKY
A little awkward, a little socially
inept. I play WoW, read, write (or
attempt to at least), draw, and
hope to someday be a licensed
tattoo artist. starvinartma-
jor, 24, g
POSITIVE VIBESN’ SUNSHINE!
Independent,attractive, hard-
working, fun loving girl looking
for the same in a laid back guy
who wants to take some time
and get to know each other in
the sunshine. humdrop, 34,
g
LONELY N BORED
im kinda shy dont get out much
but want to with someone fun, i
like camping,kayaking,swimming
also movies popcorn and snug-
gling. somtimes known to play
RPG`s and DND to. leira, 32,
LOVE/FRIENDS/HOT SEX!
CELEBRATION OF LIFE
Looking for Love/friendship or
both! Hot/kinky Sex! Dreams
realized! Art, beauty Intelegent
Artist, loving, Creative, compas-
sionate, passionate,Spiritualist,
musician, music lover, Honest,
hardworking, fun, funny kinky
intellectual kinky babe!!
Lovelylulablue, 30
THOUGHTFUL CARING
LOOK4SAME
Me: love to laugh, movies, eat out,
looking for soul mate, educated,
Love to cook, not into drama. You:
please no drama, be educated, be
ready to be cared about.
thyme4romance, 48
g
SICK OF SINGLE....
Love to have fun,. Shimmy, 35,
g
you sitting in back me standing
with a friend. we looked at each
other and then I left. I would like
to look again When:
Tuesday, July 31, 2012.
Where: the arboretum.
You: Woman. Me: Man.
#902557
LTRHALLPASS
NEW TO EUGENE
NO DRAMA!
lookin to find a discrete female
to honor hall pass as a balance
to LTR.25to48 independant or
copled. oneisthru, 40, g
I’ve recently moved here and am
looking for interesting people to
enjoy moments from time to
time with. lostJedi, 42, g
kind of old fashioned, like to
cook, love movies, rock music,
looking for a nice woman, down
to earth who is happy being
herself. Ore1964, 47
ROMANTIC, EASY GOING,
SPIRITED BLOND LOVER
sensitive & strong, good looking,
intellectual, financially secure,
creative, sensuous. Seeking a
bright, attractive, healthy, in
shape woman. Heart & soul con-
nection, trust, good communi-
cation, good intimacy. I’m loyal,
faithful. Eclectic, 48
Wanted Sexual goddess.
Attractive man seeks an attrac-
tive friend with benifits. No head
trips-honesty is a must! Nothing
too serious just great sex and
friendship. High sex drive
required. ezryder, 50, g
FUNWANTTODATE
GEEKY OLD SOUL
POSITIVE PASSIONATE MAN
Fantasy and sci-fi geek who’s
looking for fun and interesting
conversations about everything
under or over the sun. mag-
minius, 40
Spiritual tall attractive humor-
ous fun fellow who wishes to
create something grand with a
lady who harbors a great
smile,keen mind, and the sense
of adventure. Earthman, 31,
I am a business owner that loves
my work and business. Seeking
a woman to enjoy shared activi-
ties, affection, humor and play.
funwantodate, 58
Free Will Astrology
ARIES
TAURUS (April 20-May 20): At the heart of this horoscope is a
quote from Maya Angelou. While it may seem schmaltzy, I assure you
that its counsel will be essential to your success in the coming weeks.
“I’ve learned that people will forget what you said,” said Angelou,
“people will forget what you did, but people will never forget how you
made them feel.” Can you see how valuable this principle might be for
you, Taurus? If you hope to get what you desire, you should turn your
empathy on full blast. If you’d like to supercharge your vitality, hone
your skills as a judge of character. If you want to get the love you think
you deserve, be a master at making people feel good in your presence.
GEMINI (May 21-June 20): The coming week will be prime time to
celebrate your eccentricities and cultivate your idiosyncrasies. Do you
like ketchup on your bananas? Is heavy metal the music you can best
relax to? Do you have a tendency to break out in raucous laughter
when people brag about themselves? I really think you should make
note of all the qualities that make you odd or unique, and express
those qualities with extra intensity. That may grate on some people,
true, but it should have a potent healing effect on you.
CANCER
(June 21-July 22): Here are my questions: Will you thrust
your foot across that imaginary line, or will you back away from it,
scouting around for an escape route? Will you risk causing a commo-
tion in order to scratch the itch in your ambition? Or will you shuffl e
on back to your comfort zone and caress your perfect daydreams?
Personally, Cancerian, I’m hoping you will elect to do what’s a bit un-
settling. But that doesn’t necessarily mean you should. If you make a
bold move, make sure you’re not angling to please or impress me -- or
anyone else, for that matter. Do it as a way to express your respect for
yourself -- or don’t do it.
LEO
(July 23-Aug. 22): When Tchaikovsky wrote the musical score for
his famous 1812 Overture, it included 16 cannon shots. Literally. These
blasts weren’t supposed to be made by, say, a sledgehammer pounded
against a wooden mallet, but rather by the detonation of an actual can-
non. As crazy as that is, you’ve got to admire Tchaikovsky’s creative gall.
g
g
AMELIA
FLUFFY FRIENDLY FOLF
Shy, chubby, silly guy (22) who
loves coffee seeking a similar
guy, maybe thinner who likes the
outdoors but also enjoys a night
in. Tamwyn, 22, g
FUN AND QUIRKY
Love to laugh. Bit of a tech geek,
but very much enjoy being
social. looking for someone
share many fun times and con-
versations. living consciously,
and cuteness are a plus. deh-
geek, 25, g
He was going way out of the box, calling on a source of sound no other
composer had ever done. In accordance with the astrological omens, I
invite you to be inspired by his example, Leo. In your own chosen fi eld,
mess with the rules about how to play in your chosen fi eld.
VIRGO
(Aug. 23-Sept. 22): “And if nothing is repeated in the same
way,” says poet Antonio Porchia, “all things are last things.” That’s a
good principle to adapt for your own purposes, Virgo. A few weeks
from now, I bet you’ll be enmeshed in an orgy of novelty, creating
yourself from scratch and exploring experiences you’ve never heard
of before. But in the meantime, as you bring this cycle to a close, be
equally inventive about how you fi nish things off. Don’t imitate the
approach you used in tying up loose ends in the past. Don’t put stale,
boring karma to rest in stale, boring ways. Nothing repeated! All things
last things!
LIBRA
(Sept. 23-Oct. 22): All of us feel bad sometimes — sad, dis-
couraged, helpless, unloved and all the rest. It’s a natural part of being
human. Here’s the good news: I am not predicting you will go through
a phase like that anytime soon. Here’s the even better news: The com-
ing week will be an excellent time to come up with effective strategies
for what to do in the future when you go through a rough period. For
example, instead of wallowing in self-pity or berating yourself for your
weakness, maybe you can resolve, next time, to amble aimlessly out in
nature, dance to cathartic music for three hours, or go to the gym and
smack around a punching bag.
SCORPIO (Oct. 23-Nov. 21): When a domesticated weasel captures
some treasure or beats out a competitor for food, it performs a
celebratory dance that’s referred to as the “weasel war dance.” During
this triumphant display, it might hiss, arch its back, fl uff out its tail,
and hop around madly. I encourage you to come up with your own
private version of this ritual, Scorpio. It can be more dignifi ed if you
like: snapping your fi ngers, singing a magical phrase, or raising your
arms in a V-for-victory gesture. Whatever you choose, do it after every
accomplishment, no matter how small: buying groceries, arriving at an
appointment on time, getting a good new idea, or any other success.
SAGITTARIUS (Nov. 22-Dec. 21): One out of every four of us
is afraid that we have missed our calling — that we have misread our
soul’s code and failed to identify the labor of love that would provide
our ultimate fuel for living. If you’re among this deprived group, I have
good news: The next six weeks will be an excellent time to fi x the prob-
lem — to leave the niche where you don’t belong and go off to create
a new power spot. And if you are among the 75 percent of us who are
confi dent you’ve found your vocation, the next six weeks will be prime
time to boost your efforts to a higher level.
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AUGUST 9, 2012 EUGENE WEEKLY
SECRETLY JOSS WHEDON.
I’m just looking for a cool chick
to spend some time with doing
geeky things and see what hap-
pens. And if you’re a ginger I
already love you. revfelix, 23,
My Heart, My Spirit, Iím Yours.
My Life, My Love, Yours Alone.
When: Monday, August
6, 2012. Where: Forever
In Love.. You: Woman.
Me: Man. #902554
BETTER THAN BUFFY
no one else keeps me up so late.
no one else looks so good with
their hair in my fist. come over
and make my heart race When:
Saturday, July 28,
2012. Where: sunnydale.
You: Woman. Me: Man.
#902552
CHANGED MY LIFE
Two years ago on this day.
Known you forever; only just
about to meet. Bright flower
dress, brighter smile. Steelhead,
sushi, river walk, laughs. Love.
Keep climbing Linderkey. Happy
anniversary! When: Monday,
August 2, 2010. Where:
Cooking, singing, play-
ing, and puppeteering.
You: Woman. Me: Man.
#902551
TIN CUP RUM
OH NO!!!!
I think her name is Glueton! ahh-
hhhh i’m going to cry. Can you
make me one that tastes good.
When: Thursday, August
2, 2012. Where: dairy
mart. You: Man. Me:
Woman. #902553
You stole a bottle of rum and
then stole my heart. Me jumping
off the zipline after you gave it a
running
start.
When:
Saturday, July 14, 2012.
Where: cg. You: Woman.
Me: Man. #902550
BY ROB BREZSNY
(March 21-April 19): Apollo astronaut Russell Schweickart
had a vision of loveliness while fl ying through outer space in his lunar
module. “One of the most beautiful sights is a urine dump at sunset,”
he testifi ed. He said it resembles a “spray of sparklers,” as 10 million
little ice crystals shoot out into the void at high velocity. As you
feed your quest for a lusty life, Aries, I urge you to be as quirky and
resourceful as Schweickart. Come up with your own defi nitions about
what’s gorgeous and revelatory. Take epiphanies any way you can get
them.
30
TWO PRINCES
One would like to buy you flow-
ers.....you look great in my shirt
When: Saturday, August
4, 2012. Where: party.
You: Woman. Me: Man.
#902556
iím so in love with you! you drive
me crazy every single day. i give
you leTTuce weekly and i give
you my hearT daily, please give
us anoTher chance. When:
Monday, August
6,
2012. Where: biking
away wiTh my leTTuce.
You: Woman. Me: Man.
#902555
CAPRICORN (Dec. 22-Jan. 19): You can take this as a metaphor
if you like, but I’m getting a psychic impression that you will soon be
drawing on the energy of one of your past lives. Will it be a 13th-cen-
tury Chinese lute player or a kitchen maid from 15th-century France?
Will you be high on the vitality you had when you were a Yoruba priest
living in West Africa 300 years ago or when you were a 16th-century
Guarani herbalist in what’s now Paraguay? I invite you to play with
fantasies like these, even if you don’t believe they’re literally true. You
might be surprised at the boost you get from imagining yourself alive
in a different body and historical era.
AQUARIUS (Jan. 20-Feb. 18): The Italian mattress company
Sognifl ex has created a bed with features designed to facilitate
love-making. It has straps and handles, plus a trench that helps you
get better traction. The extra-strong springs produce an exceptional
bouncing action. You might consider buying one for yourself. The
astrological omens suggest it’s time to play with more intensity in
the intimate clinches. You could also try these things: 1. Upgrade your
licking and sucking skills. 2. Cultivate your ability to listen receptively.
3. Deepen your sincere appreciation for what’s beautiful about anyone
you’re attracted to. 4. Make yourself even more lovable than you
already are.
PISCES (Feb. 19-March 20): My $10-an-hour counsel only requires a
few seconds to deliver. Here it is: “Never try to be someone you’re not.
Discover what you were made for, and do it with all of your passion-
ate intensity.” On the other hand, Pisces, my $100-a-minute wisdom
is more complicated, subtle and hard to impart in less than an hour
of storytelling. Here’s a hint of it: There are times when you can get
interesting and even brilliant results by experimenting with being
something you’re not. Going against the fl ow of your instinctual urges
and customary tendencies might tweak you in just the right way — giv-
ing you an exotic grace and wild depth when you ultimately return to
the path you were born to tread.
HOMEWORK: If you could change your astrological sign, what
would you change it to and why? Write: FreeWillAstrology.com.
Go to RealAstrology.com to check out EXPANDED WEEKLY AUDIO
HOROSCOPES and DAILY TEXT MESSAGE HOROSCOPES.
The audio horoscopes are also available by
phone at 1-877-873-4888 or 1-900-950-7700.
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