Eugene weekly. (Eugene, Oregon) 1993-current, September 01, 2011, Image 19

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Eugene weekly., September 01, 2011, Page 19, Image 19

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About Eugene weekly. (Eugene, Oregon) 1993-current | View Entire Issue (Sept. 1, 2011)

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Newspaper Page TextTHU FRI SAT SUN MON TUES WED THU BY MOLLY TEMPLETON THE BIG UNEASY INCENDIES ENDS TONIGHT! C I N E M A S 6:45 for Sept 1 - Sept 8 A R T 7:30 2:15 7:30 2:15 7:30 2:15 7:30 MIDNIGHT IN PARIS 4:30 EVERYTHING MUST GO ENDS TONIGHT! 9:00 Sept 8 Sept 7 Sept 6 Sept 5 Sept 4 Sept 3 Sept 2 Sept 1 movies 5:00 5:00 5:00 DAYLIGHT 10:10 10:10 7:30 7:30 7:30 5:00 5:00 FINAL WEEK! 5:00 5:00 LATE NITE PUNCH PASSES ACCEPTED! 10:10 10:10 10:10 10:10 10:10 2:45 5:10 7:25 9:35 2:45 5:10 7:25 9:35 5:10 7:25 9:35 5:10 7:25 9:35 5:10 7:25 9:35 THE GUARD 5:10 7:20 9:30 5:10 7:25 9:35 2:45 5:10 7:25 9:35 SOON: THE TRIP PAGE ONE: INSIDE THE NEW YORK TIMES GENERAL ORDERS No. 9 TABLOID 492 East 13 th SNOW FLOWER AND THE SECRET FAN MIRANDA JULY’S THE FUTURE PROJECT NIM THE DOUBLE HOUR 686-2458 bijou-cinemas.com *Adults—$7*Students w/ID—$6*Seniors—$5*Matinees—$5*Lates—$5*Miser Mondays—$3* TIX $2 Tix 21 & FOOD $5 Sun & Tues ovER MENU 762-1700 | 180 E. 5TH AVE davidminortheater.com THURS SEPT 1 – WED SEPT 7 THE LINCOLN LAWYER SOURCE CODE PAUL WIN WIN THE BREAKFAST CLUB IF A TREE FALLS Zoe Saldana as Cataleya Food for Thought Cookie-cutter Colombiana a meager advance for female action heroes COLOMBIANA : Directed by Olivier Megaton. Written by Luc Besson and Robert Mark Kamon. Cinematography, Romain Lacourbas. Editor, Camille Delamarre. Music, Nathaniel Méchaly. Starring Zoe Saldana, Michael Vartan, Cliff Curtis, Lennie James, Amandla Stenberg and Callum Blue. TriStar, 2011. PG-13. 107 minutes.. 44211 I thought about food a lot while watching Colombiana. I thought about food not so much because I was hungry but because my brain seemed to need something to think about, and the moving pictures on the screen weren’t offering much. They were pretty enough, especially the ones with Zoe Saldana, but Colombiana is so cookie-cutter a revenge ﬂ ick that I began to wonder if Luc Besson (The Fifth Element, District B13) wrote it in his sleep, or perhaps just allowed someone to put his name on a script he only saw in passing. That’s not to suggest that all of Besson’s creations as a writer — which include The Transporter, Taken and Angela-A — are brilliant works of art. Still, the only work of art on display in Colombiana is Saldana, slim and catlike as Cataleya, a young woman who dreams only of avenging her parents, who were murdered when she was very young by some sort of underworld boss. (Amandla Stenberg plays a precociously graceful young Cataleya.) Saldana sells everything, from her faux- drunken stumble into a police station to her wrenching sobs when yet more people she cares about are taken from her. She sells, but that doesn’t mean we’re buying. Colombiana gets very dull in the stretches that don’t involve one of Cataleya’s cleverly plotted murders. The ﬁ lm ﬁ lls in the space around these murderous capers with three things: Utterly standard speeches from her uncle, who trains her to be a killer; moments of coincidence that would have you believe the FBI only ever ﬁ nds serial killers when the mail guy happens by and recognizes their tags; and fairly chaste make-out sessions between Cataleya and her super- sensy artist boy toy, Danny (Michael Vartan). If Vartan has parlayed his role on Alias into a career making out with stunning badass women, more power to him, but he’s barely even window dressing here. Nothing about Colombiana is entirely wrong; nothing about it is entirely right, either. The movie looks ﬁ ne, and an opening chase sequence pitting a generous handful of thugs against a small girl in her school uniform borrows nicely from the parkour Besson so entertainingly showcased in District B13. Saldana and her supporting cast are game enough that you never quite want to roll your eyes in disgust (though the tired all-Latin-Americans-are-thugs trope did bring me close). You may, however, let out a disbelieving snort or two. For all the ways Colombiana is cut from worn cloth, and made by men who can’t conceive of female action-hero traits beyond “aggressive” and “sexually aggressive,” I still dread seeing its box- ofﬁ ce showing held up as another reason why women can’t open big ﬁ lms. (Oddly, you never see anyone blaming men as a whole when shitty dude-movies fall on their faces.) It’s ﬁ ne. This kind of movie deﬁ es star rating systems and deﬁ es critics. It’s shiny and dumb and makes you think about dinner, but it also stars a Latina woman as a Latina heroine — a rare thing indeed — and didn’t require a burly, super- famous male love interest to get made. That counts for a few points, and a few topics of discussion over dinner. ew WWW.EUGENEWEEKLY.COM • BLOGS.EUGENEWEEKLY.COM 9:20 5:40 9/3 SHOW CANCELLED 9:20 7:25 7:25 9/3 SHOW CANCELLED 5:40 SEPTEMBER 3 OREGON VS. LSU DOORS OPEN AT 4:30 Lively Organic Farm Nectarines, Peaches, Melons, Plums! Sweet Corn, Onions, Tomatoes, Carrots, Eggplant, Beets, Cucumbers, Summer Squash, Basil, Salad Greens, Spinach, Farm Eggs, Honey, Fresh Bread, Flowers, Alaskan Sockeye Salmon from the Salmon People and Much More! Open Saturdays 10am-5pm 600 River Looop #2 • 541-461-2737 (3 miles North of Beltline off River Road) Open Tuesdays 11am-5pm 28th & Friendly Street Along with the Salmon People and Hey Bayles Farm FREE ENTRY • BEER SPECIALS GO DUCKS! FEATURING “TEXT-A-BEER” “NO LONGER SNEAKING BEER INTO THE MOVIES SINCE 2008” 30 MINUTES OR LESS (DIGITAL) (R) 12:45,5:15,9:45 APOLLO 18 (DIGITAL) (PG-13) 12:35,2:50,5:05,7:20,9:35 BAD TEACHER (DIGITAL) (R) 3:00,7:30 CAPTAIN AMERICA: THE FIRST AVENGER (DIGITAL) (PG-13) 11:00,1:55,4:50,7:50,10:40 CARS 2 (DIGITAL) (G) 11:30,2:10 COLOMBIANA (DIGITAL) (PG-13) 11:10,1:50,4:30,7:10,9:50 CONAN THE BARBARIAN (3D) (R) SPECIAL EVENT PRICING: $3.00 UPCHARGE ALL TICKETS 12:45,3:25,6:05,8:45 CONAN THE BARBARIAN (DIGITAL) (R) 11:25,2:05,4:45,7:25,10:05 COWBOYS & ALIENS (DIGITAL) (PG-13) 1:45,4:35,7:25,10:15 THE DEBT (DIGITAL) (R) 11:50,2:30,5:10,7:50,10:30 DON’T BE AFRAID OF THE DARK (DIGITAL) (R) 11:30,2:05,4:35,7:15,9:50 BEGINNERS (R) 11:00, 1:35, 4:00, 7:20,10:05 BRIDESMAIDS (R) 12:30, 3:45, 7:30,10:15 GREEN LANTERN (PG-13) 12:25, 3:05, 5:45, 8:30 GREEN LANTERN (3D) (PG-13) SPECIAL EVENT PRICING: $2.00 UPCHARGE ALL TICKETS 11:05, 1:45, 4:25, 7:05, 9:45 THE HANGOVER 2 (R) 11:20, 2:00, 4:30, 7:50,10:30 KUNG FU PANDA 2 (PG) 12:20, 2:45, 5:00, 7:40,10:20 FRIGHT NIGHT (2011) (DIGITAL) (R) 4:50,7:30,10:10 HARRY POTTER AND THE DEATHLY HALLOWS, PART 2 (DIGITAL) (PG-13) 1:45,4:40,7:45,10:45 THE HELP (DIGITAL) (PG-13) 11:00,2:20,5:35,8:50 OUR IDIOT BROTHER (DIGITAL) (R) 12:35,2:55,5:15,7:35,9:55 RISE OF THE PLANET OF THE APES (DIGITAL) (PG-13) 11:20,1:55,4:30,7:05,9:40 SHARK NIGHT (3D) (PG-13) SPECIAL EVENT PRICING: $3.00 UPCHARGE ALL TICKETS 12:10,5:10,10:10 SHARK NIGHT (DIGITAL) (PG-13) 2:40,7:40 THE SMURFS (DIGITAL) (PG) 11:15,1:50,4:25,7:00,9:35 SPY KIDS: ALL THE TIME IN THE WORLD (3D) (PG) 2:20,7:00 SPY KIDS: ALL THE TIME IN THE WORLD (DIGITAL) (PG) 4:40,9:20 MR. POPPER’S PENGUINS (PG) 11:30, 2:05, 4:35, 7:35, 9:55 PIRATES OF THE CARIBBEAN: ON STRANGER TIDES (PG-13) 12:00, 3:00, 7:00,10:00 SUPER 8 (PG-13) 11:35, 2:10, 4:50, 7:45,10:25 WINNIE THE POOH (G) 11:10, 1:00, 2:50, 4:40, 7:10, 9:20 X-MEN: FIRST CLASS (PG-13) 12:10, 3:50, 7:15,10:10 THE ZOOKEEPER (DIGITAL) (PG) 11:15, 1:40, 4:10, 7:25, 9:50 Adv. Tix on Sale CONTAGION IMAX: HARRY POTTER 7 PART 2 3D (PG-13) ★ Fri. - Sun.1200 PM 255 PM Sneak Preview: WARRIOR (PG-13) Sun.700 PM IMAX: TRANSFORMERS 3 3D (PG-13) ★ Fri. - Sun.630 PM 950 PM SHARK NIGHT IN REALD 3D - EVENT PRICING (PG-13) ★ Fri. - Sun.(1155 225) 730 1010 SHARK NIGHT (PG-13) Fri. - Sun.440 PM APOLLO 18 (PG-13) Fri. - Sun.(1140 155) 420 740 1030 THE DEBT (R) - ID REQ'D Fri. - Sun.(1130 210) 445 720 1000 OC & DA: COLOMBIANA (PG-13) Fri.(1135 AM) 715 PM Sat.(200 PM) 945 PM Sun.(1135 AM) 945 PM COLOMBIANA (PG-13) Fri.(200 PM) 425 PM 945 PM Sat.(1135 AM) 425 PM 715 PM Sun.(200 PM) 425 PM 715 PM OUR IDIOT BROTHER (R) - ID REQ'D Fri. - Sun.(1205 220) 435 700 915 DON'T BE AFRAID OF THE DARK (R) - ID REQ'D Fri. - Sun.(1210 235) 500 745 1035 CONAN THE BARBARIAN (R) - ID REQ'D Fri. - Sat.(1215 PM) 705 PM Sun.(1215 PM) SPY KIDS 4 IN REALD 3D - EVENT PRICING (PG) ★ Fri. - Sun.(205 PM) 645 PM 920 PM SPY KIDS 4: ALL THE TIME IN THE WORLD (PG) Fri. - Sun.(1150 AM) 430 PM 30 MINUTES OR LESS (R) - ID REQ'D Fri. - Sat.(1225 250) 510 750 1025 Sun.(1225 250 510) 750 1025 THE HELP (PG-13) Fri. - Sun.(1235 350) 655 1005 RISE OF THE PLANET OF THE APES (PG-13) Fri. - Sun.(1145 215) 450 725 1020 COWBOYS AND ALIENS (PG-13)Fri. - Sun.(1230) 415 710 1015 CRAZY, STUPID, LOVE (PG-13) Fri. - Sun.(1240) 400 650 935 CAPTAIN AMERICA (PG-13) Fri. - Sat.(300 PM) 955 PM Sun.(300 PM) 1005 PM HARRY POTTER 7 PART 2 (PG-13) Fri. - Sun.635 PM 930 PM CARS 2 (G) Fri. - Sun.(1220 PM 305 PM) Adv. Tix on Sale CONTAGION APOLLO 18 (PG-13) Fri. - Sun.(1250) 420 700 1000 SHARK NIGHT (PG-13) Fri. - Sun.430 PM SHARK NIGHT IN REALD 3D - EVENT PRICING (PG-13) ★ Fri. - Sun.(100 PM) 720 PM 940 PM COLOMBIANA (PG-13) Fri. - Sun.(120) 410 710 1010 DON'T BE AFRAID OF THE DARK (R) - ID REQ'D Fri. - Sun.(110) 440 740 1020 CONAN THE BARBARIAN (R) - ID REQ'D Fri. - Sun.730 PM 1030 PM SPY KIDS 4: ALL THE TIME IN THE WORLD (PG) Fri. - Sun.(1240 PM 350 PM) THE HELP (PG-13) Fri. - Sun.(1220 330) 640 950 RISE OF THE PLANET OF THE APES (PG-13) Fri. - Sun.(130) 400 650 930 Adv. Tix on Sale CONTAGION SHARK NIGHT (PG-13) Fri. - Sun.450 PM SHARK NIGHT IN REALD 3D - EVENT PRICING (PG-13) ★ Fri. - Sun.(200 PM) 730 PM 1010 PM OUR IDIOT BROTHER (R) - ID REQ'D Fri. - Sun.(150) 440 720 940 CONAN THE BARBARIAN IN REALD 3D-EVENT PRICE (R) - ID REQ'D ★ Fri. - Sun.710 PM 1010 PM COWBOYS AND ALIENS (PG-13) Fri. - Sun.(130) 420 700 950 CARS 2 (G) Fri. - Sun.(140 PM) 430 PM Times For 09/02 - 09/04 © 2011 EUGENE WEEKLY SEPTEMBER 1, 2011 19