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About Eugene weekly. (Eugene, Oregon) 1993-current | View Entire Issue (Nov. 21, 2007)
TO PLACE A CLASSIFIED AD CALL 484.0519 ¡ASK A MEXICAN! BY GUSTAVO ARELLANO Dear Mexican: What's the deal with Spanish-language car dealer- ship commercials that feature bikini-clad porn star-wannabes copu- lating with used cars? I just saw one where three girls were rubbing melted chocolate on each other. Surely, no one in mainstream Caucasian America could get away with such overtly sexual, misog- ynistic advertising. Does this type of ad actually convince people to buy cars? — Not Buying a Used Sentra with Boob Prints all Over It Career Training WRITERS WANTED The Academy for Alternative Journalism, established by papers like this one to promote diversity in the alternative press, seeks talented journal- ists and students (college seniors and up) for a paid summer writing program at Northwestern University’s Medill School of Journalism. The eight-week program (June 22 - August 17, 2008) aims to recruit talented candidates from diverse backgrounds and train them in alt-weekly style feature writing. Ten participants will be chosen and paid $3,000 plus housing and travel allowances. For information and an application visit aaj.aan.org. You may also email us at alta- cademy@northwestern.edu. Applications must be postmarked by February 8, 2008. Northwestern University is an equal oppor- tunity educator and employer.(AAN CAN) Business Opportunities EARN HOLIDAY MONEY Shop? Save. Earn! Skin care, cosmetics, bath, body & men’s. Plan your stress free holidays now. Tracy 744-6642 $700-$800,000 FREE CASH GRANTS-2007! Personal bills, School, Business, Housing. Approx. $49 billion unclaimed 2006! Almost everyone qualifies! Live operators. Listings, 1-800-592-0362, ext. 235 (AAN CAN) BECOME A ROMANCE Specialist Essence Of Romance Parties. Starting Kit and training materials will be shipped to you. For More Information www.essenceofromance.com E- mail corporate@essenceofromance.com Phone: 800-695-3613 POST OFFICE jobs available! Avg. pay $20/hr. or $57K annually, including federal benefits and OT. Paid training, vacations. PT/FT. 1-866-616-7019 USWA. (AAN CAN) DREADING MONDAY? Work from home-no commute, no boss, total freedom. Executive level income. www.mcmholdings.com, or 1- 800-430-5990. HELP WANTED. Earn extra income assem- bling CD cases from home. No experience necessary. Start immediately. 1-800-405- 7619 ext. 150. www.easywork-greatpay.com (AAN CAN) DATA ENTRY Processors needed! Earn $3,500-$5,000 weekly working from home! Guaranteed paychecks! No experience necessary! Positions available today! Register online now! www.BigPayWork.com (AAN CAN) MOVIE EXTRAS, actors, models! Make $100- $300/day. No experience required, meet celebrities, full/part time, all looks needed. Call now! 1-800-556-6103, ext. 528. (AAN CAN) OUTDOOR YOUTH COUNSELOR. Do you love the outdoors and helping troubled teens? Immediate openings at Eckerd outdoor therapeutic programs in NC, TN, GA, FL, VT, NH, and RI. Year-round residential position, free room/board, competitive salary/bene- fits. Info and application: www.eckerdy- outh.org. Or fax resume to Career Advisor/AN, 727-442-5911. EOE/DFWP (AAN CAN) Each sentence from the following pregunta is an excerpt from the multiple questions in the Mexican’s archive that address the same topic. SHIT HAPPENS 24 hour full service plumbing and rooter Service 343.0888 CALL A. HANNAMAN • 541-653-9750 1241 Willamette • Eugene, OR ccb 178662 / pb 9750 Dear Alien: You didn’t specify where you’re from, so I’ll assume eres from another dimension because no gabacho would ever send in the above question. From Betty Boop's race-car driver in Ker Choo to Paris Hilton recording a burger-chain commercial a couple of years ago that saw the heiress washing a carro, Americans have insisted that girls accom- pany their grilles—and Mexicans are no different. Freudians can debate the whys, but Mexicans only care about the whos (chicas calientes), whats (appearing in car commercials), whens (during weekend morn- ings), wheres (on your local Spanish-language channel), and hows (vigorously). If you only take one thing from Earth, Sentra, it’s that sexo sells in all languages. Oh, and that Guatemalans can’t spell. Having been called a gabacho, I couldn’t help being interested in the etymological root of that word. I'm never sure what the refer- ence is with the term gabacho, since in my Spanish dictionary (Bantam New College Revised from 1987), gabacho means "Pyrenean" (someone from the Pyrenees, the mountains between France and Spain), "Frenchy," or "Frenchified Spanish." My ques- tion is which came first: the Spanish "gabacho" for the French, or the Mexican "gabacho" for the gringo? Does this go way back to those French vatos that got their trousers kicked on Cinco de Mayo in Puebla? Ramen is yummy. Dear Readers: Few features of this column are more controversial that the Mexican’s preference for gabacho instead of gringo to describe gabachos. Technically, gabacho refers to an inhabitant of the Pyrenees, but it became a Spanish slur for a Frenchman over the centuries. The Royal Academy of Spanish states gabacho originated from the Provençal word gavach, which means "bad-speaking." (Quick note for amateur etymologists: don’t believe the 2000 collection Chicano Folklore: A Guide to the Folktales, Traditions, Rituals and Religious Practices of Mexican Americans, which states gabacho comes from an arcane Castilian term meaning "a current of water," or the NTC’s Dictionary of Mexican Cultural Code Words edition claiming, "When Mexican men noted that foreign men often helped their wives in the kitchen, something a Mexican male wouldn’t dream of doing, they began calling such men gabachos or ‘aprons.’" ) When the French briefly conquered Mexico during the 1860s, the Mexicans correctly ridiculed the occupying army as gabachos; after los franceses left, the term remained, and Mexicans applied it to their perpetual European antag- onists: Americans. Nevertheless, many Mexicans grumble that I should call gabachos gringos since it’s the more accurate term for gabachos (funnily, none ever ask I stop slurring our pasty amigos). So why does this Mexican use gabacho? Besides growing up with the word, it allows Mexicans to smuggle two ethnic slurs in uno handy word—not only are we calling gabachos grin- gos, but we’re also calling them French. Parlez-vous double insult, cabrones? CONFIDENTIAL TO: The state of Oklahoma, which recently enacted one of the harshest anti-immigrant laws in the country. Don’t give Mexicans mier- da about H.B. 1804 being anti-ILLEGAL immigration—your Sooner ances- tors and Okie grandparents sure as hell didn’t make such distinctions when invading the Unassigned Lands and California, respectively. May a Dust Bowl of pedos afflict your slack-jawed state. ¡Viva Tom Osborne! THEMEXICAN@ASKAMEXICAN.NET NOVEMBER 21, 2007 37
