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About Eugene weekly. (Eugene, Oregon) 1993-current | View Entire Issue (June 24, 2004)
Sweet Energy LOWEST RATES lawnmowing. Reliable Jon’s Handiwork. Mowing, edging, organic gardening, plant- ing, pruning, hauling, Spring prepa- ration, all landscaping needs. Reasonable rates, since 1996. 302- 5758. Licensed, Bonded, Insured. COMPOST TEA SERVICE Have all the benefits of compost tea delivered to your plants. Soilsmith services, local and non toxic. Call Kevin at 744-7816 for pricing and free consultation. FAST RELIABLE home and yard service, fix, haul away, pressure wash, dig load, tree clean-up, weedeat. Keith, 913-5119. AFFORDABLE YARD work. Bob and Bill’s yard care. $10 per hour, two hour minimum. 915-8336. GARDEN HELP? Knowledgeable, energetic botany student desires work helping you in your garden. Good ideas. Several years experience. Reasonable rates. Call Dove, 343- 3297. THE TRAVELING GARDNER, Ladonna. Tending your yard as though it were my own. Weeding, bed-cleanup, maintenance, lawn care, vacation plant care. 726- 7071. DIG IT? What two earthly species have mastered the art of farming? RESPONSIBLE, SKILLED worker available to do yard work, weeding, clean up, general labor. $10/hr. 4 hour min. 434-0628. Landscape NATIVE AND urban garden design and consultation, land- scape construction service. One time or ongoing maintenance of gardens. Holde Fink 344-5317. OLCB#6262. Maintenance/ Repair CALL CAL, handy fellow at your service. Maintenance, general home care, and yard work. Free estimates. 689-7320. Painting CUSTOM QUALITY HOUSE PAINTING by ArtTrek. Interior, Exterior. Restoration. Faux Finish. Sterling and Ruth. www.arttrek- inc.com 683-0626. ccb#62677. FREE ESTIMATES and guaran- teed. Local company with national backing. Bonded, insured. Professional. Sean 510-6069. CCB#149892. Yard & Garden LET IT GROW! Landscape and garden maintenance. Mowing, trimming, rototilling, restoration, saw work, hauling. Organic only. 868-4434. BIKRAM’S YOGA C O L L E G E O F I N D I A DANDILYON GARDENING. Spring clean up, consultation, design, weeding, mulching, bed preparation, regular mainte- nance, mowing, hauling. Always organic. Barb, 683-4464. HUGE PLANT sale. Lots of unusual and inexpensive perre- nials. Open daily until all gone. 689-4686. 3000 Calla, River Rd area. AT THE EUGENE WELLNESS CENTER Computer Attitude Adjustments FREE COMPUTER CONSUL- TATION. Repairs, networking, software support. In your home or business. Call Tim 344-5298. Chakra Balancing with Therapeutic Essential Oils, Reiki, and Sound Therapy Culinary FUNNY FOOD. What southern dish of corn and mixed vegetables is made famous by a Warner Brothers character? APRIL ROBYN 521-7385 1405 MILL STREET • EUGENE Financial ANGIE’S CHILDCARE One full time or one to two part time. River Road area. Loving, fun and safe. 463-9981. $$CASH$$ Cash now for struc- tured settlements, annuities and insurance payouts. 800-794-7310. J.G. Wentworth. J.G. Wentworth means cash now for structured settlements. (AAN CAN) AS SEEN ON TV $$ cash now. Ten years offering best cash for whole, part of structured settle- ments, annuities, and lottery pay- ments. ppicash.com Call now 800- 815-3503. (AAN CAN) Coaching Language WANT MORE progress in your life? Feeling stuck in relation- ships, work, creative projects, finances, health, fitness? Break through barriers, meet goals, cre- ate a more satisfying life. Contact Keith McConnell, PhD, 485-4223, 1-800-306-0266 or drkeith- coach@juno.com for a free sam- ple session. PRONTO SPANISH and other languages. Native-experienced instructors. All levels. 7-8:30 p.m. 6-week course $55. 485-6647. Child Care “facilitated a deep connection between my body and my baby.” “an important part of my pregnancy, birth and post-partum health & happiness.” Monarch Massage PREGNANCY THROUGH POST-PARTUM MEAGAN ORION, LMT • 683-8289 LIC.# 8166 I START with the ceiling and end with the floors and somehow, everything in between gets really clean. 20 years experience. References. Call Niki at 485-7666. BY ROB BREZSNY Music PIANO TUNING and repair. Associate member of piano tech- nicians guild. Matt 345-8216. ARIES (March 21-April 19): “Let that which stood in front go behind!” roared Walt Whitman in his poem “Respondez!” “And let that which was behind advance to the front and speak.” That’s the first clue you should meditate on in the coming week, Aries. Your second hint is from Bob Dylan, who could have been talking to you when he wrote these words for his song, “The Times They Are A-Changin’”: “The slow one now/ will later be fast/ And the first one now/ will later be last.” TAURUS INTRODUCTORY PACKAGE (April 20-May 20): Are you the type of person who is capable of altering your trajectory in midair? Let’s say, hypothetically speaking, that you worked in the cir- cus as a human cannonball. Let’s say you had just been shot out of a cannon but sensed you were headed towards a spot on the ground a few feet beyond the safety net. Could you wiggle or shimmy in such a way that you accomplished a mid- course correction, ensuring that you landed where you want- ed to? In my astrological opinion, Taurus, you could. 2 weeks for $20 For details, call 349-YOGA Energy Readings, Energy Healings, Medical Intuitive Sessions Spirit Awaken! inc. Energy Healing Center 541-607-9792 Kelly Windhaven, Energy Healer & Medical Intuitive GEMINI (May 21-June 20): According to my research, astrologers and economic forecasters are about equally accurate in their predictions. The difference is that some astrologers can provide useful financial advice, whereas most economists can’t distinguish a Mercury-Saturn conjunc- tion from a transit by retrograde Venus. Given the fact that you’re in a phase when you’ll thrive on financial advice from a metaphysical perspective, I suggest you seek input only from the first type, the business-savvy stargazers. And since I’m one of them, I’m happy to offer you this tip: Having a sensitive soul and spiritual yearnings are often impediments to getting richer quicker, but for now the reverse is true for you. CANCER (June 21-July 22): I have a pleas- ant assignment for you, Cancerian: Decide what form of abundance is most important to you. Is it money? Friendship? The land you own? Is it romantic love or creative inspiration or your children? Of course you probably value several differ- ent kinds of abundance, but your challenge right now is to determine the one that you prize above all others. Whatever you decide it is, it will flourish in the next four weeks. Healing Massage LEO (July 23-Aug. 22): You’ve got that look in your Lucia McKelvey, LMT • Nationally Certified Days, Evenings, Weekends 541-683-3286 LIC.#8250 Deep Tissue • Swedish • Trigger Point Myofascial Release • Essential Oils eye, Leo — that slightly demented, fervently giddy expres- sion I see in you every now and then. Judging from previous experience, I surmise you’re about to either launch a brave quest to the frontiers of your understanding or else hurl your- self into a sticky abyss where all the demons adore you. You realize there’s a difference, right? One is scary fun and the other is glamorous torment. Please go to your room, take a hundred deep, slow breaths, and meditate about what you should do next to prove how much you love yourself. www.jeffreyburch.com VIRGO Rolfing structural integration ® Visceral Manipulation CranioSacral Therapy 541.689.1515 (Aug. 23-Sept. 22): Wal-Mart is famous for the stingy pay and benefits it offers its employees. But another giant chain store, Costco, is the opposite. It’s so good to its workers that some business gurus disapprove. “From the perspective of investors, Costco’s benefits are overly gen- erous,” says retail analyst Bill Dreher, quoted in the Wall Street Journal. He thinks the company’s benevolence depresses its stock value because investors are afraid its profit margins aren’t as high as they could be. But the fact is that Costco is very successful, and its five-year growth rate has been 10.1 percent annually, better than Wal-Mart’s 9.8 percent. All this is preface, Virgo, for my warning that your gifts may also be criticized in the coming week. Be unfazed, please. Have faith that the best way to build your prosperity is to cultivate your generosity. LIBRA (Sept. 23-Oct. 22): According to my reading of the astrological omens, you’re about to receive a burst of attention — maybe even be offered your 15 minutes of fame. If you don’t especially care about being seen on TV, quoted in the newspaper, or gossiped about by professionals, you should negotiate with fate to bring you a heightened visibility that’s more useful and interesting. How about having your good work get more recognition and appreciation from the few peo- Jeffrey Burch MS, LLC ® The Rolf Institute • 9092 ple who really matter, for instance? I’m sure you can have a lot of influence on how your higher profile manifests, Libra. All you have to do is get very clear about what you really want. SCORPIO (Oct. 23-Nov. 21): Your magical powers will be at a peak in the coming days. Reading peo- ple’s minds will be the least of what you’re capable of. I wouldn’t be shocked if you were able to concoct love potions in your kitchen, get useful tips from the spirits of the dead, or control the weather in your vicinity. Given the fact that you’ll be able to accomplish wonders I can’t even imagine, I’m reluctant to make a suggestion. Who am I to give advice to a potential superhero? But I feel it’s my duty to let you know that the very best use of your magical powers will be as fol- lows: to help those in need, to fight for justice and freedom, and to conjure up miraculous sex. SAGITTARIUS (Nov. 22-Dec. 21): Have you ever seen that bumper sticker that goes, “I am bril- liant and talented, but I have to do dumb and self-destructive things to relax”? Studies at the Free Will Astrology Think Tank have shown that a far higher percentage of Sagittarians exemplify this bad habit than any other sign. Even if you aren’t dominated by it, you probably fall victim to it every once in a while. That’s the bad news. The good news is that you now have the power to break its hold on you. By August 1, with hard work and a little grace, you could very well have earned the right to put the following bumper sticker on your car or refrigerator: “I am so brilliant and talented that I’ve discovered how to relax in uplifting ways that enhance my brilliance and talent.” CAPRICORN (Dec. 22-Jan. 19): Sometimes Zen masters with valuable teachings appear in the form of children playing or old folks in fading health or boring geeks you look down on. On occasion, crucial help can’t arrive any other way except through bewildering riddles you barely understand or seemingly trivial distractions that appear to be wasting your time. It’s one of those phases right now, Capricorn. To get you in the mood, here’s some foolish wisdom from ex-baseball player, Yogi Berra: “When you come to the fork in the road, take it.” AQUARIUS (Jan. 20-Feb. 18): “Dear Reverend (or is it Irreverend?) Brezsny: After long meditation on what’s missing from my relationship with God, I found the answer: a sense of humor. I realized I can never truly love or honestly communicate with a Supreme Being who doesn’t chuckle. Alas, there doesn’t seem to be a single text in any religious tradition that’s even slightly funny. Can you give me some hope? - Aquarius in Search of a Droll Deity.” Dear Aquarius: You’re in luck. According to my inside sources, the Divine Creator will soon unleash Her comic genius in your vicinity. You can expect a flood of playful teases, mind- bending jokes, and slapstick disruptions in the conventional wisdom — all designed to provoke sacred, cleansing laughter. Here’s even better news: She’ll be laughing with you, not at you. PISCES (Feb. 19-March 20): In his poem “The History of My Life,” John Ashbery poignantly refers to the death of his brother as a child. He quickly follows it with self- mocking humor about how fast that sad event forced him to grow up. “Ashbery is always vacillating between the unbear- able heaviness and unbearable lightness of being,” Fred Moranarco writes in The American Poetry Review, “as if mov- ing between the two make both extremes bearable.” I expect this will also be your forte in the coming week, Pisces: the ability to flow gracefully between profundity and frivolity, between penetrating explorations of complex mysteries and sweet celebrations of breezy delight. (P.S.: Unlike Ashbery’s experience, your dive into the depths won’t involve death.) Homework: I am now accepting birthday gifts from my readers. (Please understand, though, that they will not work as bribes.) Send offerings to www.freewillastrology.com or P.O. Box 150628, San Rafael, CA 94915. You can call for your EXPANDED WEEKLY HOROSCOPE: 1-900-950-7700 • $1.99 per minute • Touchtone phone 18 & over • c/s 612-373-9785 JUNE 24, 2004 31
