Eugene weekly., June 03, 2004, Page 35, Image 35

Weddings
CREATIVE
WEDDINGS
Ceremonial Ministers Registry.
Civil, Interfaith, Ethnic, at your
special location of choice. Free
brochure. 915-5723, 337-1182.
Writing/Editing
Child Care
WED-SUN 8AM-11:30PM.
Earthsong Childcare. River Rd
area, healthy meals, great pro-
grams for kids of all ages.
RF516604. Lindsay, 688-2810.
SAY IT RIGHT. Writing, editing,
proofing, typing (term papers,
theses, manuscripts, press
releases, letters, reports,
brochures, profiles). Angela, 343-
0917; aegremont@aol.com
Film/Video
STUDIO D. VIDEOWORKS
offers full production services to
individuals and companies. Call
Scott, 393-3939. www.studiod.tv
Language
SPANISH, ENGLISH classes,
translation and interpretation. All
ages. Writing and converstation.
Hannah, 485-5254.
PRONTO SPANISH and other
languages. Native-experienced
instructors. All levels. 7-8:30 p.m.
6-week course $55. 485-6647.
Bodywork
HOT TUB, with deep massage. M,
Tu, Th, F. Springfield Spas. Cindy
Muntwyler LMT#1617. 741-1777.
DHARMA MASSAGE Center.
343-2745, M-F. Morning discount,
1-1/2 hours, $45, 34th and
University, Ms. Nishan VanAtta,
LIC#3430.
Classes
FIRST DEGREE Reiki training.
June 17, 18, 19, 20, 6:30pm to
9:30pm. Karen Gordon, Reiki
Master. The Reiki Room. 683-3448.
Music
Counseling
PIANO TUNING and repair.
Associate member of piano tech-
nicians guild. Matt 345-8216.
EXPERIENCED COUNSELOR.
Receive support and learn skills to
increase your resourcefulness.
Enhance your inner and outer life.
Richard Grimaldi, MPW. 344-7604.
Web Design
WEBSITE REVIEWS. Not get-
ting the results you need from
your website? We can help!
Custom evaluations and solutions.
NolanDigitalArts.com 485-5000.
VIAGRA, $2.40/DOSE. Cialis
available. Lowest price refills
guaranteed! Call PBG we can
help! Non Profit Organization Toll
free: 1-866-887-7283. (AAN CAN)
Wellness
CANNABISCONSULTANTS.COM
Get your medical marijuana card.
484-6979. Leave address for free
brochure of services and fees.
DISCOUNT PRESCRIPTION
drugs. Phentermine, Soma,
Tramadol, Ambien, Viagra. Get
FedEx delivery direct to your
home from a licensed U.S. phar-
macy. www.BayRx.com or 1-800-
721-0648. (AAN CAN)
Intuitive Arts
Financial
$$CASH$$ Cash now for struc-
tured settlements, annuities and
insurance payouts. 800-794-7310.
J.G. Wentworth. J.G. Wentworth
means cash now for structured
settlements. (AAN CAN)
Health &
Nutrition
Energy Work
MEDICAL INTUITIVE AND
ENERGIST, Francesca Fleming
is available for appointments in
Eugene and Portland. Detailed
body readings issues, and chakra,
aura balancing. Master level
energy work. Call 503-805-7403.
MALE WITCH. Psychic readings
and counseling. Casting and
removal of spells. Contact with
spirits. Call 24/7. Tom: 800-419-
3346. Credit, Debit cards. Get
back the one you love. (AAN CAN)
YOU CAN Be Living A Higher
Vibrational Life with assistance
from Nadine Peterson. 345-4234.
Massage
REJUVENATION Open 10 to 10,
7 days a week. Massage, chiro-
practic and natural beauty care.
272 W. 11th Ave, Downtown
Eugene. Father’s Day gift certifi-
cates avail. Call now 349-0540.
www.rejuv.org
INTRODUCING THE VIOLET
Gypsy’s Traveling Spa. Lavishing
you with luscious organic afford-
able spa treatments in your own
home or garden. Indulge. Ring
686-2069, ask for Iris.
SPECIAL PRICE massage.
Introductory $25/hr. Nice office.
Diane Whiffin, LMT#9736. Flexible
hours. 1660 River Road, 461-5950.
BIRTH DESIGN Doula Services.
Exceptional support during the
prenatal period and for your birth.
You can have the birth you desire
in the surroundings you choose.
Please call Janene Becker, LMT,
CD (DONA) at 284-5947 or visit
www.birthdesign.com
HOLISTIC BIRTH Classes;
emphasis on natural birth. Great
for home, hospital or birth center
birth. Reserve space now. Elise,
685-0063, Georganne, 242-3601.
Reiki
THE REIKI ROOM. Karen
Gordon, Reiki Master. 683-3448.
Treatments and Reiki training.
Usui Reiki practitioner since 1983.
www.karenjgordon.com
NW CENTER FOR REIKI
TRAINING and Healing Arts.
Reiki I and Il class monthly. Reiki
III Masters Seminar quarterly.
915-5723, 726-1151, 337-1182.
Yoga
RIVER ROAD YOGA. Classes,
day retreats. Join Tom Clark for a
Hatha retreat June 13 from 10 am
to 4 pm. 344-0553 www.dhar-
malaya.com
Sweet Energy
AT THE
EUGENE WELLNESS CENTER
Attitude Adjustments
Chakra Balancing with
Therapeutic Essential Oils, Reiki,
and Sound Therapy
Give Your Body the Attention it Deserves
www.jeffreyburch.com
Rolfing
structural integration
®
Visceral Manipulation
CranioSacral Therapy
541.689.1515
®
CERTIFIED ROLF MOVEMENT PRACTITIONER
LIC.#8250
Author of “The Fasting Diet”
Saturday, June 5th • World Café
447 Blair Blvd., Eugene
10am - 12 noon
Therapeutic Yoga classes
available for clients
The cost is $3.00 to $20.00 sliding scale at the door.
No registration necessary, just get there.
BY ROB BREZSNY
ARIES (March 21-April 19): There is a Native
American nation that white people call the Winnebago. The
tribe’s members refer to themselves, however, as the
Hotcâgara. That’s your first metaphorical clue for the
week, Aries. You should firmly correct anyone who mis-
names or misidentifies you. Here’s another tip, courtesy of
the Hotcâgara. In their origin myth, the great god
Earthmaker wakes up to realize he is the only being in the
universe. In his abysmal loneliness, he weeps. His tears
become the oceans and rivers and lakes of our world. I
suspect that the tears you cry in the coming week will
also, like Earthmaker’s, be profoundly creative.
TAURUS (April 20-May 20): In his book The
Gulag Archipelago, Aleksandr Solzhenitsyn documents the
Soviet Union’s oppression of many ethnic groups between
1918 and 1956. “Only one nation would not give in, nor
acquire the mental habits of submission,” he noted.
“These were the Chechens. They never sought to please,
to ingratiate themselves with the bosses … No one could
stop them from living as they did.” I don’t mean to imply
that the manipulative pressures coming to bear on you,
Taurus, are anywhere near as severe as what the
Chechens experienced. In fact, your version might be
rather covert or subtle. But I urge you, nevertheless, to
stand up in defense of your independent spirit with a
Chechen-like clarity and ferocity.
your journey, Gemini, your free will is a more important
factor in determining your fate than the constraints of
karma or the whims of the gods. I won’t waste your time,
then, predicting what may or may not lie ahead. Instead,
I’ll invite you to formulate self-fulfilling prophecies about
the beautiful future you want to create. To help tease out
your brainstorms, I offer you a few of the laws of life
articulated by Hawaiian shaman Serge Kahili King: 1. The
world is what you think it is. 2. There are no limits; every-
thing is possible. 3. Energy flows where attention goes. 4.
Now is the moment of power. 5. To love is to be happy. 6.
All power comes from within.
Take Time Out
Lucia McKelvey, LMT • Nationally Certified
Days, Evenings, Weekends
541-683-3286
Dr. Stephen Bailey
GEMINI (May 21-June 20): At this point in
Relieve Stress
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CANCER (June 21-July 22): “Dear Dr.
Brezsny: Last night I dreamt I was returning home from a
horrid date with a man who didn’t even know my name. As
I came into the living room, the heating duct flew off, and
hundreds of rabbits started pouring in. At first I didn’t
mind, but then they started to attack me. Long story short,
I was eaten alive by cute cuddly bunny wabbits.
Comments? -Apparently Delicious Moon Child.”
Dear Moon Child: I think you’re dreaming for the entire
Cancerian tribe. Here are some possible dream interpreta-
tions. 1. You’ve been too nice for your own good lately. 2.
Your extreme, almost manic fertility is leading you to do
things that aren’t healthy for you. 3. You should minimize
contact with anyone who doesn’t see you for who you
really are, and you shouldn’t indulge people who take
advantage of your nurturing sweetness.
LEO (July 23-Aug. 22): “Leafing through Forbes or
Fortune is like reading the operating manual of a strangely
sanctimonious pirate ship,” wrote Adam Gopnik in the
New Yorker. My perspective is a little different. I think of
Forbes and Fortune as the Bibles of the world’s pre-emi-
nent religion, the Holy Orthodox Church of Business As
Usual. It’s a cult we all have to come to terms with and
pay tribute to. What’s your relationship with it, Leo? Have
you made your peace, or are you in a state of tormented
denial? If it’s the former, the next three months will be a
favorable time to increase your income. If it’s the latter,
you should consider going on a financial vision quest.
VIRGO (Aug. 23-Sept. 22): [Note: In the spirit
of the epic yet mysterious turning point you’re at, Virgo,
I’m providing you with an extravagant yet cryptic oracle.
Read it with the nonlinear side of your brain.] Your escape
from the false “home” is imminent. Are you ready to
change about 10 percent of your mind about who you real-
ly are and 20 percent of your mind about where you truly
belong? Regard it as a lucky sign if the prospect of fresh
freedom rouses an ancient fear. It means you’re close to
Jeffrey Burch MS, LLC
® The Rolf Institute • 9092
finding the lost key to the kingdom of childhood, which is
also the key to the secret garden of adulthood.
LIBRA (Sept. 23-Oct. 22): Using probability the-
ory, mathematician J.E. Littlewood calculated that most
people typically experience a miracle at a rate of about
one per month. In my experience, that estimate is high. I
think the average is closer to one miracle every seven
weeks. But you Libras can disregard this speculation com-
pletely. The astrological omens suggest that the next four
weeks will bring you at least four and as many as nine
amazing synchronicities, supernatural interventions, and
wondrous mysteries.
SCORPIO (Oct. 23-Nov. 21): There’s a
chance that friends or family members will soon behave in
a way that drives you crazy. It’s also likely, however, that
they will connect you to new resources and help you tran-
scend your limitations. A third possibility is that they will
do both: hurt you and heal you. However it all shakes out,
Scorpio, you can be sure that your closest relationships
are about to teach you lessons you didn’t even realize you
needed to know.
SAGITTARIUS (Nov. 22-Dec. 21):
Laughter Yoga (www.laughteryoga.org) is a new interna-
tional phenomenon that began in India. Practitioners gath-
er together regularly to engage in half-hour sessions of
nonstop chuckling, chortling, and cackling. Yogic breathing
exercises supplement the therapeutic value. The month of
June will be an ideal time for you Sagittarians to launch
local branches of these Laughter Clubs. The astrological
omens say you’ll be running into an extraordinary number
of funny things. That’s lucky for you, because you have a
lot of accumulated tension to purge, and the best way to
do that is by having hilarious experiences.
CAPRICORN (Dec. 22-Jan. 19): Your
guardian angel is in a feisty mood. I wouldn’t be surprised
if that not-so-imaginary friend played a trick on you in an
attempt to get you to lighten up. Nor would I be shocked if
that wise old fool woke you up in the middle of the night to
teach you a new freedom song. A kick in the butt isn’t out
of the question; nor is a tickling sensation in your id or an
oddly pleasurable itch in your funny bone. No matter what
form they take, Capricorn, I urge you to regard these visits
from your secret helper as gifts of inspiration.
AQUARIUS (Jan. 20-Feb. 18): The
Weekly World News sponsored Wear Your Thong To Work
Day last March 26. I didn’t tell you about it back then
because you just weren’t ready for it. This week, though, I
can justify advising you to stage your very own Wear Your
Thong To Work Day. According to my reading of the astro-
logical omens, you’ll have a lot more slack than usual
whenever you express the raw, uninhibited, risk-taking
sides of your nature. If doing the thong thing isn’t the way
you’d prefer to cash in on this opportunity, choose some-
thing that’s a more unique reflection of your daring side.
How about an Indulge Your Fantasies Day, or a Be Your
Future Self Day?
PISCES (Feb. 19-March 20): In the Greek
myth, Persephone was abducted by Pluto, god of the
underworld. He took her to his domain with the intention
of making her his queen. Persephone’s mother Demeter
pleaded with Zeus to intervene, and he agreed to do so,
declaring that as long as Persephone had not eaten any
food while in the underworld, she had to be returned to
her mother. But by then it was too late: Persephone had
already nibbled four pomegranate seeds. Eventually, a
compromise was reached: Zeus decreed that Persephone
must dwell in Pluto’s realm for four months of every year,
but could live in the sunlight the rest of the time. The moral
of the story, as far as you’re concerned, Pisces: Don’t eat
even one bite of that underworld food.
Homework: Find or make up a new
secret. Treat it like a treasure that heightens your myste-
riousness and enhances your value. Anonymous tips
accepted at www.freewillastrology.com.
You can call for your EXPANDED WEEKLY HOROSCOPE: 1-900-950-7700 • $1.99 per minute • Touchtone phone 18 & over • c/s 612-373-9785
JUNE 3, 2004 35