ntertainment
Clackamas Print
Wednesday, March 14, 2007
5
One-acts simply ‘Perfect’
»
Why do the Japanese think
they can just re-invent gaming
franchises over and over with
Wilson, and Lysistrata, written by Aristophanes
out any regard for how much
they piss off the Americans?
Sega’s most recent title,
“Sonic and the Secret Rings,”
for the Nintendo Wii, plays
like crap, and considering it’s
been roughly 10 years since
they’ve made a decent “Sonic”
game, I’d say it’s time to give
it a rest
Sonic file Hedgehog is
a spiky, blue beast that runs
ridiculously fast and keeps a
constant smirk on his face to
show he has “attitude,” what
ever that means. His primary
enemy is a bald, egg-shaped
man - called “Dr. Eggman”
- who turns fuzzy, little forest
creatures into robots, because
that’s what evil people do.
Sonic frees his woodsy friends
by jumping on their heads
because, frankly, it worked for
Mario.
The original “Sonic” game,
released on a 16-bit Sega
Genesis cartridge in 1991, was
loved by fens for its simple,
exciting gameplay. In order
Ito successfully complete any
given level, a player had to
be able to shift from carefully
controlling Sonic over a patch
of spikes or across a set of
floating logs to letting him
loose to tear across a straight
away at absurdly high speeds.
It was, basically, a radical give-
and-take control scheme that
made the game unique and
addicting.
and directed by Mark Polendey. Students of fee
stand up comedy class will also perform.
Ulirra
Sonic’s new “Secret Rings”
several
turned
Sega’s
system,
fails to recreate that seamless
give-and-take once again, and
only further smudges fee name
of the once-great gaming icon.
The control scheme was
an interesting idea, I suppose.
I Holding fee Wii-mote control-
I ler sideways and tilting left or
I right to direct Sonic as he runs
I outright seemed like an inter-
I esting way to play a full-length
I game, blit fee idea got stale
I early and didn’t make much of
an effort to redeem itself
I think fee only saving
■ grace (in fact, fee only rea-
I son anyone might spend their
I money on it at all) is fee multi-
| player mode. Sonic and his
I friends are featured in several
'mini-games” as they com-
_ pete in different tournaments
I just for bragging rights. The
I mini-games themselves vary
I widely, and if one were lucky
I enough to get his or her hands
I on a full set of controllers for
I their Wii, there might still be
I ■some fun to be had, even if
it does feel a little like every
single other game Nintendo
has put out since Christmas.
I’m not much for review-
I ing video games normally,
I but Sonic was my first, and
1 1 felt like something needed
I to be said. “Sonic” used to
I give fee great “Super Mario
I Bros.” a run for their money
I (no pun intended), but after 16
I years, a string of good fran-
I chise sequels followed by a
I longer string of bad ones. I’m
■ starting to wonder if maybe
■the time has come for Sega
Ito hang up Sonic’s running
■shoes for good.
Today from noon to 1 p.m.
Tomorrow from noon to 1 p.m. and 7 to 8 p.m.
cum
0SSÈ
McLoughlin Theatre
Free
AU photos by Brandy-Marie Faulhaber Clackamas Print
ABOVE: (from left to right) Sarah Karlgaard, Kelly Miller and
James Sharinghousen in the one-act performance Lysistrata.
RIGHT: Heather Ovalle and Carleigh Anable perform in the
politically-charged one-act play Perfect.
St. Patrick’s Day: It’s not easy being green
Katie Wilson
Co-Editor-in-Chief
. title, much like the
I titles since fee series
I three-dimensional on
I ¡ill-fated Dreamcast
Student-directed one-act plays Perfect, writ
ten by Mary Gallagher and directed by Sarah
St. Patrick’s Day (March
17) is perhaps the most useless
celebration day ever.
Celebrate the Irish? Huh?
Why should we celebrate them?
We don’t celebrate the Polish,
or the Dutch, or the Chinese, or
the Sioux tribes. Why the Irish?
All they did for quite some time
was work in factories, breed
red-haired children, drink cheap
alcohol, lay down the railroad
tracks and swear in interesting
accents.
Also, they’re to blame for all
the annoying, floaty, New Age
“Celtic” music in the world.
We’ve let the Irish guilt-trip us
into this one.
Now, I like the Irish all right,
but I feel like St. Patrick is
probably rolling over in his grave
and. it makes his soul hurt that
we’ve trampled over his religious
day. Poor St. Patrick: “I drove the
snakes out of Ireland, and this is
the thanks I get? Boozy college
students and green beer?!?!?!”
Anyway, that being said, how
could one celebrate St. Patrick’s
Day in the Portland area,
especially if one can’t, or won’t,
drink?
I have compiled a list of 10
different activities:
1. Wear green - This one
should be obvious. There are
people who believe in pinching
others on St. Patrick’s Day if said
others are not wearing green. Yes,
these people should be locked up.
Unfortunately, they won’t be. So,
wear green. It’s fun.
.2. Don’t kiss them because
they’re Irish. Bad idea.
3. Kissing a blarney stone is
an option, but why anyone would
want to kiss something called a
“blarney stone” is beyond me.
4. Go to the 36th Annual
Jazz Festival here at the college,
March 16 and 17 from 8 a.m. to
11 p.m. in the Niemeyer Center.
The festival features musicians
from middle, junior high and high
school, as well as Clackamas’ very
own instrumental jazz ensemble.
Admission is $5 per person. For
more information, call the Music
Department at (503)-657-6958,
ext. 2434.
5. Go see the Oregon
Symphony recreate a ‘60s concert.
There will be period instruments,
clothes and Beatles music. This
show runs from March 17 to
19, and tickets are a ridiculous
price: $34.25 to $88.50 - but
anything that costs more than
$5 is a ridiculous price in my
mind. The concert will take place
at the Arlene Schnitzer Concert
Hall. For more information about
tickets and times, call (503) 248-
4335.
6. St. Patrick’s Day is also
National Quilting Day. Be unique:
make a quilt.
7. Study for finals. Boring? I
know. Necessary? Only if one is
interested in passing one’s classes
and being a useful and productive
member of society. This could
just be my opinion, though.
8. Visit www.irishscene.
com, and discover all the cool
things they’re doing to celebrate
St. Patrick’s Day in Western
Australia. Who knew?
9. Sing Irish drinking songs.
They’re always pretty even
though the words are usually
slovenly and terrible.
10. And finally, consider not
celebrating St. Patrick’s Day at
all since, honestly, it is just about
the drinking.
Have fun.
Stay Close.Go Far.
We invite you to visit our beautiful campus and
take advantage of ali that we have to offer.
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