BRACE
UP!
RUNNING TO SEED
Du you feul old before your time? 1»
your bui k. buut end at if f T Do you
xuffer urinary disorders? Don’t despair
— profit by Cottage Drove experience»
Sylvester Urban Discourses on
Cottage
Grove
people
recomtueud
Dunn’» Kidney Pill». Here’« a Cot
So-Called Human Race.
tnge Grove re»ident ’» statement.
Mr». M Kebelbeck, Birch uud J St».,
■ hvs : " I huve nothing but word» of Can See Nothing But Atrophy a» Re
praise for Doan'» Kidney Pill». I was
sult of the Labor Saving Device»
subject to kidney weukue»» for u long
of Prosont Day.
t line and never found anything that
helped ine uutil 1 began using Doan ’»
“ I’m only twenty-eight years old,”
Kidney Pill». I use D o u i i ' h occasionally said Sylvester Urban, according to h
uud they keep me free from all kidney New York Sun writer, "and I'm afraid.
ailment». I um glad to udvise other I’m afraid of the future. I ’m afraid
kidney »ufferer» to u»e Doan’s Kidney of civilization."
Pills. ” (Statement given February 22,
“ What’g come over you now?” asked
1913.)
hi» friend "I've heard you utter gome
On March 27, 1920, Mrs. Kebelbeck strange sentiment over a glass of
suid: “ 1 always recommend Doan’s Third rail,' but this latest Is beyond me
Kiduey Pills for they put my kidneys How can one be afraid of civilization?
in good condition. 1 use Douu ’» occa
“ One might well »hrtnk In his shoes
siouully for a tonic.”
| at the thought of a return to savagery
Price 60c, at all dealers. Dou’t sim or burbarlsm. But life become» safer
ply ask for a kiduey remedy—-get with every ensuing , ear of civilization.
»D oan ’s Kidney Pills— the same that Just look about you at all these safe
Mrs. Kebelbeck bud. Foster'Milburu guards----- ”
"That's Just It,” broke In Sylvester
sadly
"You’ve hit the crux of the
matter right off. Just look about you,
as you »ay, and what do you »ee? Here
we are In au average New York apart
ment—four rooms and bath. Above us
Is an electric chandelier. When you
want light Just press a button. There
Is a radiator, i f you want beat on
a frigid day Just lean over from your
easy chair and turn a knob. Or do you
prefer the cheer of an open grate Are?
Just turn on the gas.
"Wouldst dine? Just telephone a
delicatessen aud presently the dumb
waiter bell will buzz and your food
arrives lu the kitchen. A Are In the
range Is yours for the striking of a
match aud the turning of a jet. Hot
water?
Twist a faucet.
Driuklng
water? Twist another faucet.
"One usually has garbage after a
meal A most trlAIng matter. Dump
It In the garbage cun and send It
down the dumbwaiter. Music after the
dessert? Put on a record. It has one
of these repeaters— latest thing, you
know. No ueed to bother with the
machine until It runs down. In the
next room Is su electric reproducing
Woodson Garage, I’bone 27
piano. The world's greatest artists
After garage ciotte», photic tea
perform for you uud you dou't have
to turn a Auger, so to speuk. The
idonee, 118-L.
door bell rings. There Is the mall
and the newspaper.
"Suppose 1 want to go dowutowu to
work or shop. 1 just step Into a sub
way and sit down. When 1 leave the
train 1 don’t eveu have to walk out
AUCTIONEER
of the stutlou. 1 merely stand ou an
escalator. Arrived at the street, I de
Will »ell your farm, Block, ini
cide. perliups. to take a taxi. I just
plemcnts, machinery, household
get In and alt down. When I reach
goods, autos and merchandise
my ultimate destination the chauffeur
opens the door of the cub fur me and
MY PRICE IS RIGHT
the dooruiuu opens a portal for me
Will go uuywticre, any time Inquire
to enter the store.
at City Transfer Office, phone »11
"Leaving the store I take a Fifth
avenue bus to my office. 1 go ou top
to get the fresh air and Aud they've
even Inclosed the upper deck In glass
P B O r E B B IiD N A l.
CARDS
to protect children of civilization from
healthful ozone.
DR A W K1ME
"Dou't you see that everything Is
Specialist in Obstetric»
arranged so that I cun live without
Will care for confinements at his
moving a Auger, so to speak? Keel
home if desired. Special nurse if re
qlured Phones: office, 34; res 126J
my muscles There's nothing to them.
I couldn't lick a healthy ten-year-old
H. W. TITDB, D. M D.
boy and 1 couldn't run Ave blocks
Dentistry
without staggering from exhaustion.
Modem equipment. First Nutiouul
My body, the thing l live In, the thing
Bunk building. Hours, U to 12 and
that keeps me alive, is becoming ob
1 to 6. Evenings and Sundays by
appointment. Office phone, 10; res
solete slid Is fallen into disuse through
idence phone, 153 Y.
the sufeguurds of civilization.
"And don’t forget that the soft food
DR W. E EE BOW
purveyed In these latter days Is euer
Dentist
vatlng to our teeth. An emineut physi
Office Fifth and Muiu. Hours, 8:30
cal culturlst urges us to tug at a
to 12 and 1 to 5:30. Evenings and
Sundays by appointment. Phones,
handkerchief with our molars each day
office 36, residence 134 Y.
as a substitute for the exercise for
merly got liy chewing strong, coarse
DR. 0. E. FROST
foods
Thtuk of that ! Men chewing
Office in Lawson builnug
at rags like babies!
Phone 47
“ is there really to be such a thlug
Cottage Grove
Oregon
as the superman—the uiuch-heralded
product of higher civilisation? Judg
GAVEN O. DYOTT, M D
Ing from my own life average men
Physician and Surgeon
are going to form a race of pygmies
X-ray work in ull its branches Eve
uings by appointment.
—physical d W H r t s . anemlcs."
634 Mum
Cottage Grove, Oregon
And Mr. Sylvester Urban with a
feeble hand lifted a glass lo his Ups
J. E. YOUNG
Attorney at Law
Utilize War-Tims Ambulances.
Office reur of First Nutiouai bank
Many ambulances owned by volun
Cottage Grove, Oregon
teer organizations during the war have
been converted Into commercial ve
H. J. SH INN
hicles--many of them without under
Attorney at Law aud
Notary Public
going any great physical chunges with
Practices in all courts. Twenty five
the exception of the removal of equip
years of experience
ment required only In an ambulance.
Bader Bldg.
Oottuge Grove, Ore.
About the streets may be seen de
livery vans easily recognized us war
A L T A K IN G
lime automobile ambulances, the New
Attorney at Law
York Sun states
The name of the
Collections, Probate, Notary Public
original donating organization und Its
774 Willamette St., Eugene, lIre.
Insignia are discernible In some cases
J. 8. M EDLEY
under the new coats of paint on the
Attorney at Law
vehicle, und from the rear one can see
Eugene Loan A Savings Bank Bldg
still the long benches on each side that
Eugoue, Oregou
once marked the ambulance, but uow
are used for piling merchHDdlse on
DR W M H A M ILTO N
Chiropraetic
Chrome cases a specialty
tiffice
Newfoundland Water Power.
over Darby hardware Residence at
A total of 285,000 horsepower Is es
212 South Pacific Uighwa).
timated as the probable output of a
project which conies from a rather sur
MRS r. J. AL8TOTT
prising locality.
The development Is
Suggestive Therapeutics
to be undertaken of the Humber val
Why keep your puinsf Beth ctnuuic
aud acute ailment» treated
ley, Newfoundland, with the expendi
Phone 180 L
Cottage Grove, Ore.
ture of I7.00U.00U within the next two
years
The power project Is tied up
J. T. «P R A Y
with logging and other operations In a
Real Estate, Insurance uud
way which will Involve the permanent
Collection»
employment of 1,500 men In the works
Office in First National hank build
and 2,000 men In the woods. The pa
ing; Sixth street entrance
per resources o f the Island will be
very largely expanded by the new de
HERBERT W LOMBARD
velopment, which la actually under
Attorney at L i *
contract at the present writing. -Ex
First National Sauk Building
change
Cottage Grove, Ore.
Phone 94
J
Cottage Grove Bottling Works
1 JITNEY K
Ralph Chestnut
C. O. DeVere
DR
ROY SMITH
Veterinarian
Phone» 1114 and 915
146 Park Street, Eugeue, Oregon
Tima Waa Up.
Ourloua— What went wrong at the
wadding? Dirt the bride faint?
Earraatlc No—the license expired.
»—Wayside Talas.
BAD HUBBY GOOD FOR W RITER
Wlfa Who Gives Advice on Managing
Spouaa Goto Soma Idoao
From Hor Mato.
“ Yea, Indeed," said the Greenwich
Villager with a husband as she
reached for the matches, according to
che New York Sun. “ I’ve placed a
lot of things since 1 married. Espe
cially with the women’« mugazlnes.”
"1 don't »ee how you ever get so
much. You Just seem to turn them
, out with a crunk."
"There Is a crank Involved,” admit*
ter the villager, "but unfortunately
he's getting better tempered every
day.”
"Cyril Y’ asked the friend with In
terest.
"How nice that you’re Im
proving him. He did have a fairly bad
disposition."
“ That's why 1 married him," sighed
the villager.”
“ R e a lly!” exclaimed the friend.
“That seems a rather odd reason.”
“ Oh, n o; It was quite sensible," pro-
tasted the villager. "You see, I ’ve al
ways done a lot of articles on how to
get on with your husband, and I
■ thought I could get a lot of ideas
from CyriL
And I have.
I ’ve stud
ied his rages and found out just what
caused them and how to make him
stop them, and then I've written him
up. But now I know so well how to
manage Cyril that he doesn't get Into
rages any more— and really, 1 don't
»ee how I can afford to go to Scotland
this summer."
“ Still,” comforted the friend, "It
must be rather nice to think that you
get on so well together. Isn't there
copy In that?"
“ A Uttlet” admitted the villager,
“ but It's the unhappy marriages the
women are Interested In. But, of
course, there’s always some copy you
can get out of a man—even a good-
tempered one.''
“ Such as— ?" prodded the friend.
“ Oh--all the foolish things they do,”
explained the villager.
“ The ridicu
lous way they waste their money, and
their general helplessness, and their
self-centeredness and all that. I ’m do
ing a series along those lines for the
Woman Rampant.
Of course, Cyril
doesn’t know It.
But whenever the
maguzlne comes he reads those arti
cles und sputters. He says there never
was such a brute and a fool as that
wouian describes.
Declares It can't
be true, because no self-respecting
woman would lire with him.
And
then I get scared and take the maga
zine away from him."
“ Afraid he'll recognize himself, I sup
pose?'' said the friend.
“ Oh, no. Indeed 1" returned the vil
lager
“Cyril would never do that!
But I'm frightened to death he’ll—
he'll—"
“ What?" pressed the friend, breath
lessly.
"Reform,” said the villager.
Stage Illusions.
Lady Kell complained. In a letter to
the Times, of the way actors destroy
stage Illusion. There was nothing new
In this
The taking of “ calls” has
tieen denounced since most of us can
remember.
But the number of let
ters which followed Lady Bell’s sug
gested that the theater. In this peri
od of decadence. Is taken by many
with a seriousness that promises bet
ter things some day. Not the most
serious grudges the actors their ap
plause at the end of the performance,
but It Is certainly unwelcome to see
a row of smiling faces on the stage
a moment after the curtain has fallen
ou a scene of terror, grief or melan
choly In which those very faces have
worn far different expressions Wheth
er the Illusion Is destroyed is another
question. Perhaps It depends o d tem
perament. There are some lovers of
the theater who are Impervious to
all Its absurd conventions. To these
even the buck of the stage after a
performance on a cold winter's night
Is
still
fairyland.— London
Times
Weekly.
Connecticut Nature Studies.
Mrs. Edith A. Smith has a cat that
knows a thing or two. One day last
week the cat brought in a garter
snuke. It left It In a closet off the
back pantry. Mrs. Smith In looking
over some articles In the closet that
ufernoou came across the snake, which
was In an almost dormant condition.
It had life enough, however, to wig
gle. uud With the Arst wiggle Mis.
Smith almost faiuted away
This
same cal last summer brought lu a
black snuke. The tall of the snake
was colled around the cat's neck. The
cat had hold of the snake in the mid
die and hud all It could do to drag
It Into the house.— Kariulngvllle Cor
respondence HldgeAeld Press.
"Moss Growers' League."
A heard on the chin keeps the shav
ing money in.
That’s the new slogan of the latest
London freak society, the Hirsute Half
Hundred, says the New York Sun
Thut is to say, they call themselves
the Hirsute Half Hundred. The rest
of London calls them simply Moss
Growers.
Barbers are contemptuous In regard
to these gentlemen who bsve disre
garded conventions and adopted the
latest In streamline beards
But the hairy ones laugh and say:
"Aha, but think, a shave each day
costs s dime
We save 865 dimes a
year—now go ahead and laugh at us"
A Disadvantage.
City Man - I suppose you And your
automobile a great Improvement over
your old horse, farmer.
Old Farmer—Wal. In some ways,
yes. and In other ways. no. I can’t
go ter sleep on my way home from
town and wake up In the barnyard,
like I could with old Dobbin.
ORIGIN OF GOLF
Sootch Shepherd Said to Have
Originated the Game.
With Hla Crook as a Braasla and
Stona for a Ball Ha Mada tha
Circuit af tha Links.
How a schemer must enjoy himself ■ Psychologists and physiologists migh ;
spending the money he lias filched spend tome time profitably in stndyin ;
from widows aud orphans.
the peculiar effects produced upon th ■
• a .
human body by certain occurrence»
Wheu truth is sufficieutly colored it j For iustanue, bringing the head onex
pactedly in contact with some bar.
becomes a black lie.
• • •
object causes a bump to appear which
The uext best thing to seeing a seems to have some peculiar influenc
woman devoted to her husband is to upon the mental attitude o f the persoi
see a man who is worthy of that devo
tion.
Try to so live and do that when folk
• • •
talk about you they will have a goo .
Man deserves no credit for the good subject to talk about.
uature that is the result of indolence.
Six hundred years and more ago aa
A seven foot studeut is enrolled at a wife who quits a job that supports her
old shepherd In Scotland grew tired
o f doing nothing all day but look after western university. Nature has pro to marry a mau who has never been
hla sheep so be amused himself by vided him well for higher education.
able to support himself.
¿nocking a stone about with bis crook.
It Interested him to see how far he
could knock that Uttle stone and how
he could beet get It out when It fell
Into graeey hullowe or among other
etonee. He choee ae round a stone ae
possible and put a distinguishing mark
upon It
One day he mentioned this pastime
to the shepherd In the next field, who
tried It, too.
Then they made some
of the places more difficult and meas
ured off definite points and goals. At
night, on their homeward way they
would swap yarns.
They measured
off their holes In a circle, because In
that way they could keep watch over
their sheep, and they marked their
holes with a tag of wool attached to
a atake.
Soon all the shepherds of
the neighborhood were following their
example.
This, aays the Christian Science
Monitor, Is one version o f the origin
of golf.
It waa the game of shep
herds In the beginning; but we find It
the game of kings as well. We have
an account of the train of James VI
of Scotland and I of England playing
A lighted m atch to the w ick and your
on English soil.
The first match on
oil cookstove is instantly ready. 11 con
record waa when the duke of York,
afterward James II of England, and
centrates clean, steady heat directly
an Edinburgh shoemaker defended
on the cooking utensil.
Scotlsnd's claim against two English
noblemen. Shortly after this matches
became more common, with prizes of
N o coal or w o o d to lug, or ashes to
clubs with silver bands, 12 balls or a
shovel
out—a clean, cool kitchen tree
simple medal.
By Scottish laws we can trace the
from dirt and smoke.
history of the game from very early
times
In 1458 the Scottish parlia
T o obtain best results, use P e a rl Oil
ment enacted that "because golf di
—the clean-burning, uniform kero
verts attention from archery, it must
be cried down,” and It seems to have
sene — scientifically refined and re
been necessary to renew many time*
refined by a special process.
a law that golf must not be played on
Sunday.
With a praiseworthy eye to economy,
P e a rl O il is sold b y dealers e v ery
James 1 In 1018, disturbed because "no
w h ere. F o r y o u r o w n protection order
small quantities o f gold and silver are
transported yearly out of his highness’
by nam e — P e a rl Oil.
kingdom of Scotland for buying of golf
balls.” conferred s monopoly of golf
S T A N D A R D O IL C O M P A N Y
ball manufacture upon James Melville
(California)
for 21 years, but added that he must
not charge more than four shillings.
This same King James appointed W il
liam Mayne, Bower Burgess of Bdln
burgh, club maker to hla highness
"during all the days of hla lifetime.”
(K E R O S E N E !
The implements early became as
HEAT
good as those of today, with the ex
A N D L IG H T
ception of the balls.
The first real j
balls were o f leather, stuffed with
feathers; then they were mnde of
gutta perch» with a smooth surface.
It was soon discovered, however, that
Indentations »e r e an aid to rotations,
and the balls were hammered with the
chisel end of a hammer.
Later, of
course, the Indentations were made In
the mold.
As far as records show, golf was I
first known In America in New York,
but tradition states it was played on
the Pacific coast by a band of old sea
captains In the Sixteenth century.
When women begun to play is not
known, but times have changed since
the following quotation was true:
"Men play the game, the boys the
clubs convey, and lovely woman gives
the prize away."
PEARL
The Night Garden.
In order to have a garden really
fascinating and glowing at night—In
the darkness or In the moonlight—
quantities of white Aowers should be
used.
As night comes on the Aauntlng. gay- (
colored flowers fade Into the darkness
and become part of It, while the pure
white flowers stand forth gloriously
agalust the background of night
White varieties of tulips, Iris, peo
nies. sweet alyssum, rose» lilies, fox
gloves, hollyhocks, dahlias, zinnias
ageratum, and Japanese anemones will
give a wonderful night effect In the
garden from April until November. The
most satisfactory white shrubs are ,
white Iliaca, splreas. deutzlas, Japa
nese snowballs, hydrangeas, and al-
theas.
Big Forest Travel.
In 1920 more than 4,000.000 people
visited their 152 national forests for
recreatiou. But one feature not gen
erally known, says the American For
estry association, la the fact that each i
year there are serious losses from
two causes. The first loss Is through
forest Ares started by careless camp
ers It aggregates millions of dollars
annually. The more serious Is actual
life lost due tv the lack of sanitary
necessities In forest camp grounds.
The federal government bas never ap
propriated a dollar for such work.
Forester Greeley Is asking foi tlo,
000 for this purpose.
Little Known Fish.
Recent ocean discoveries Indicate
that there are many kinds of deep
sea fish atlll uucaugbt. It Is said that
there are 600 kinds of fish to be
fouud off the coast of Florida, and
a great aquarium la to be opened soou
at Miami for their study.
No Rspcater.
Bha— You don't love me aa much re
you used to.
He—Yes, I do, my dear, but I have
exhaust ad my vocabulary.