The Cottage Grove sentinel., July 22, 1910, Image 2

ATCHISON GLOBE SIGHTS.
CONGRESSMAN HARRISON
FRANK J. GOULD HAS
IN THE “IN BAD CLUB”
QUIT NATIVE COUNTRY
United
States is to lose
T HE
another of its
bur ­
ton HARRI­
F rancis
SON, representa­
tive in congress
multi-millionaires.
from the Six­
Nearly 20 years
teenth New York
ago William Wai- ■
district, says he
dorf Astor found
is not the orig­
things too slow for I
inal of “Little
him in this coun­
Lord Fauntleroy,”
try and he packed
which was writ­
his valise and
ten by Mrs. Fran­
moved over to
cis Hodgson Bur­
England.
There
nett and not by
was considerable
mother, as
fuss. about it at
F. B. Harrison. his
many persons be-
the time, and
some of the real Americans expressed lieve.
No matter whether Mr. Harrison is
their disapproval of William Waldorf
in terse language. Astor renounced the original of the lad with flaxen
all allegiance to the United States, but curls and velvet clothes, he is the
continued to get most of his great in­ original member of the Taft “In-Bad
come from his mammoth realty hold­ Club,” so far as members of congress
ings in New York city. He gave up are concerned. He is a son of Mrs.
his citizenship to become the subject Burton Harrison, the author, and has
of royalty, but he held on to the prop­ written a few lines himself. He was
erty, the foundation for which was elected to congress first from the
laid in the sale of rat traps, or was it Thirteenth district of New York,
which takes in a large part of lower
polecat skins?
The United States has gone on, ad­ Manhattan. Then he moved up to the
vanced faster than any other nation northern part of the city, where the
on the globe; the stars and stripes Democrats gave him pretty nearly
continue to wave and William Wal­ 10,000 more votes than were cast for
dorf Astor has about been forgotten. his Jtepublican rival.
He was the Democratic candidate
Now comes Frank Jay Gould, sixth
child of Jay Gould, who says he in­ for lieutenant governor of New York
tends to live in France the remainder in 1904. He is regarded as of the
of his life. Jay Gould got his many “silk stocking” element in congress,
millions from the people of the United and probably would have done more
States through his vast railroad con­ for his country than he has had he
nections. His name spelled M-O-N-E-Y been with the majority instead of the
In Wall street, and there still live men minority in the house.
His achievements have not been of
who would be better off if it were not
a
nature that has caused any great
for his operations. But Jay Gould is
dead. He has left us George Gould furore, but New York seems to have
and Helen Gould, and the good they approved him as a member of con­
have done has more than compensated gress and he has many firm friends in
the country for the loss it will feel Vfcshington.
Consequently when the announce­
when Frank Jay Gould takes up his
ment
came that Mr. Harrison was
residence in that gay Paree.
Frank Gould is connected with many persona non grata at the White
railway, lumber and other corpora­ House and President Taft had refused
tions. One estimate of his wealth is to see him there was much surprise.
$20,000,000. He can buy lots of things It seems that Mr. Harrison elected
In France for that, but like William himself to membership in the “In-Bad
Waldorf Astor he will get the money Club” by assailing the president’s ac­
from the United States. Mr. Gould tions in connection with the bitter
was born in New York city in 1878, Ballinger-Pinctiot feud. President
and educated in New York university. Taft didn’t like It and he made it
that he didn’t care to see Mr.
In 1901 he married Helen M. Kelly, known
Harrison
if the New York congress­
but their marriage relations were not
called at the White House.
pleasant so a divorce court severed man
Of course Mr. Harrison didn’t know
them.
he had offended so terribly, so with
V
- ——
two others of the New York delega­
tion in congress he went to the exec­
SOCIALIST PARTY BOSS
utive mansion as escort for several
K PREDICTS GREAT GAINS distinguished Jews who wished to
confer with the president concerning
INCE the So­ the treatment of Jews in Russia. The
cialists elected other two members got by Secretary
their ticket in Norton, but the new “buffer” for the
Milwaukee the president halted Mr. Harrison tn the
eyes of the nation outer office in such a way that Mr.
have been on Harrison’s companions didn’t know, it
Emil Seidel, the
mayor, to see
how he will come TAFT MISSES CARPENTER,
out in enforcing
HIS FORMER SECRETARY
his policies in the
town that a cer- ■
RESIDENT
tain brand of beer .
TAFT, accord-
made famous.
ing to close
While many
friends,
misses
have been watch­
his old secretary,
ing Mayor Seidel others, especially
Fred W. Carpen­
the big politicians of the country,
ter. Ever since
have had Victor L. Berger, the social­
Mr. Taft went to
ist boss of Milwaukee under the I
the Philippines 12
searchlight and are looking to see
years ago to be
,what he is going to make of the great |
governor of the
influence that has come to him. It !
islands, Mr. Car*
is admitted in Milwaukee that Ber- •
penter has been
ger is the power behind the throne
his private secre-
and that whatever may happen he
Fred W. Carpenter. ^ary-
*will be the responsible person.
Mr. Carpenter
That Berger will be a candidate for is a Minnesota man. He was working
congress is expected and another test in a law office in San Francisco when
of the Socialist strength will be the Mr. Taft started to the Philippines,
result. Meantime Mr. Berger is going Mr. Carpenter was recommended to
ahead with his affairs and says those him as well suited to the position of
who expect to see Milwaukee turned private secretary.
up side down by radicalism will be
Mr. Carpenter’s retiring disposition
disappointed. Mr. Berger has been has prevented his following the presi­
delivering lectures in the east. While dent in all the latter’s travels through
in New York a few days ago he said the country. In this respect he was
ithe Socialists expect to carry both different from Secretary Loeb, who
¡Chicago and New York and that the kept close to Mr. Roosevelt on all oc­
old parties are doomed.
casions.
“This first important Socialist vic­
Too much loyalty to his chief may
tory in a large American city,” he said, be one of the faults of Mr. Carpenter
“means the sweep of the popular tide and is said to partly explain his resig­
Itoward the radical doctrines and the nation. Members of congress have
end of the two important political par­ been heard to complain that through
ties.
the vigilance of Mr. Carpenter the
“The Democratic party I view as a president has not been as accessible
[decomposing carcass that met its end as they wished. Mr. Carpenter wanted
because of lack of principles and to protect his chief from annoyances
Ideals, and the Republican party as and may have failed in tact.
•a disintegrating force in government.
Any way, he is going to Morocco
“The spread of insurgency in the Re­ as minister from the United States.
publican ranks means the formation It is said tjiat his arduous duties,
of a new party that will be composed which have often kept Mr. Carpenter
of the defecting elements in that party confined to the White House offices
and the Democrats who have es- for many hours at a time, have told
Ipoused the cause of W. J. Bryan. on his health and that when he ex­
¡.The other party will be made up of pressed a desire to give up the work
Ithe machine Republicans and the gold the president at once decided that
the climate of Morocco would be just
iDemocrats.
“Neither Theodore Roosevelt nor the thing for his secretary.
While Mr. Taft was secretary of
[any other Republican is able to close
¡the wide breach in the party, and the war, Mr. Carpenter’s position was just
¡moribund Democratic party cannot be to his liking, but he found the duties
¡reconstructed sufficiently to take ad­ of secretary to the president far dif­
vantage of the schism In the opposi­ ferent than those of an assistant to a
cabinet officer.
tion 'faction.
Not being a robust man he could not
j “I am not fixing a date for this
jevent, but nhould the new parties con­ stand the strain, so he decided to get
tinue in the mistakes of the present out of the way of a man who could.
dominant elements, a revolution more Mr. Taft then sent to the senate the
disastrous than that which overthrew appointment of Mr. Carpenter as min­
the aristocracy in France a century ister to Morocco and made Charles
ago, will result.*’
- D. Norton his secretary.
You can account for very few mar*
blages.
Every time any big bill is presented
to you, it looks like robbery.
If a woman can get her first man,
she needn’t worry about her second,
or third.
“My duty,” said an unhappy mar­
ried woman to-day, “is anything HE
objects to.”
There is plenty of cooking as good
as “mother’s,” but very few appetites
like a boy’s.
We have observed that there is .it-
tie complaint about the high prices
of beer and cigars.
The women pick at men and at
goods offered at special sale, in the
same industrious way.
You are always at a disadvantage in
arguing with a man who doesn’t know
what he is talking about.
Have you ever noticed how sudden­
ly a useful man can die, and how long
a worthless man holds out?
A book agent speaks as highly of
the book he sells as a reformer speaks
of the reform he represents.
Scrapping in families is objection­
able, but it is not so bad as when kin
praise each other too much.
When you hear a smart saying by
a child, it is a sign the child has a
smart mother, and that she made It
up.
A man and woman going on a wed­
ding trip try hard not to look happy,
and on their return try just as hard
to look happy.
FASHION HINTS
K
Partners for Years But Never Speak
N
S
P
Flanigan—Phot would yez do if yea
lived to be 200 years old? Lanigan—•
has. He counts them so he will know Oi don’t know yit.—Brooklyn Life.
when he has half of them. This half
Young Hopeful—Mummy, have goose­
he puts into a pasture. Then he berries got legs? Mother—No, dear.
counts out a third and puts it in an­ Young Hopeful—Then I’ve swallowed a
other pen. Next he counts what’s left caterpillar.
and finds he has 32. After a little
Husband—Why don’t you act cheer­
figuring he finds how many in the ful, like Mrs. Binks? Wife—I would
whole flock. Very practical. I guess if I were a widow, as she is.—Cleve­
dad didn’t **udy that book.”
land Leader.
ANSAS CITY, Mo.—Was education
The next book he examined was
more practical a generation ago, “Milne
“Have you noticed, my friend, how
Inductive Arithmetic,” edi­
or did John’s father study his books tion of ’s 1879.
many
fools there are on earth?” “Yes,
miscellaneous exam­
more thoroughly than John does? ples he found In
and there’s always one more than you
the
following:
John is a seventh grade student in
Two ladders will together just think.”—Sourire.
the public schools. He asked his
Teacher—Jimmy, you look very
father one day to help him solve the reach the top of a building seventy- pale this morning. Are you ill? Jim­
five
feet
high;
If
the
shorter
ladder
is
following problem:,
my—-No, ma’am. Ma washed my face
A, asked how much money he has two-thirds the length of the other, this morning herself.
what
is
the
length
of
each?
In the bank, replied: “If I had $10
He—I asked your father’s consent by
“Why didn’t he measure each lad­
more I would have $1,000 more than
half what I now have.” How much der separately?” John asked himself. telephone. She—What did he say?
“That problem is not practical. I He—He said: “I don’t know who. you
money had A?
“Such a fool problem,” said the guess dad is older than I thought. I are, but it’s all right.”
Stranger—Rastas, do the people who
father. “Tell that teacher to ask the want an older book.”
The text book written in 1868 was live across the road' from you keep
cashier. You have been pestering me
with problems like that for a week. handed to him. The book was evi­ chickens? Rastus—Dey keeps some of
Suppose your teacher asked you hÒw dently Influenced by the Civil war, for ’em, sah.—The Housekeeper.
it was filled with problems dealing
old you are. Would you tell her:
“Edison has perfected his invention
“ Tf I were ten times as did as I with battering down fortifications of cement houses which may be pour­
am, diminished by 42, I would be 30 and the sustenance of soldiers. One ed.” “Then it’s me over the hills to
years older than dad, and if dad were problem was:
the poorhouse.”—Houston Post.
“If twelve pieces of cannon, eighteen
one-fourth as old as he now is he
“Then you don’t want to leave foot­
pounders, can batter down a fortress
would be my age?’”
upon ’the sands of time?”
“What would your teacher do if you in three hours, how long will it take prints
“
Nix,
”
answered
the politician guard­
answered in such a mariner? In my for nineteen twenty-four • pounders to edly. “All I want
is to cover up my
days we had practical problems in batter down the same fortress?”
tracks.
”
“That’s fine for a general,” John re­
our arithmetic.”
“How was July Fourth observed in
In order to investigate his father’s flected, “but dad says that I am going
your town?” “In the usual way; there
statement John went to the public li­ to be a. captain of industry.”
Another arithmetic of the same date were one hundred people at the town
brary and asked for an old arithmetic.
The librarian gave him “Richard’s had the famous fish problem, with exercises, and five thousand at the
Natural Arithmetic.” He turned to which John’s teacher had troubled him baseball game.”
the page marked “Practical Exercises” for six- weeks before he himself finally
Traveler in Africa—This vast plain
explained it to the class. Th® fish is, I believe, what is known as the
and read:
A puts his whole flock of sheep into problem is.
veldt? Boer—Veil, ve don’dt call it dot
“The head of a fish is ten Inches no more. It is now called der Roose-
three pastures; half go into one pas­
ture, one-third into another and 32 long. Its tail is as long as its head veldt.—Judge.
into a third. How many in the flock? and one-half the body. The body is
“Don’t you think it looks mannish to
“That’s queer,” said John. “Prac­ as long as the head and tail both. smoke cigarets?” said Mrs. Flimgilt.
tical exercises, too. Here is a man How long is the fish?”
Very handy problem for a butcher. “It may look, that way for a woman
who wants to find how many sheep he
to smoke them,” replied Miss Cayenne,
“but not for a man.”
The Sunday school class was sing­
ing “I Want to Be an Angel.”' “Why
each was a specialist who did his part don’t you sing louder, Bobby?” “I’m
to perfection. Their separate inter­ singing as loud as I feel,” explained
ests in the firm so interlocked and Bobby.—The Delineator.
they worked together so harmonious­
“Miss Bright,” whispered Miss Gaus-
ly that within five years they were on sip, “can you keep a secret?” “Yes,”
the high road to fortune. It was just replied Miss Bright, also whispering, “I
at this time that these two partners can keep one as well as you can.”—
fell out. It arose from a trifling dif­ Catholic Standard and Times.
EW YORK.—In one of the large ference their wives had. Naturally
Bones (telling a story)—Well, the
wholesale houses in this city each partner, through loyalty to his evening wore on
Jones—It did,
there are five partners. Two of them spopse, took her side, and the quarrel eh? What did it wear? Bones—
have not spoken to each other except grew so bitter that it culminated in Well, if you must know, I believe it
over the telephone for twenty years. blows being exchanged. Then they was the close of a summer day.
Their private offices are not more vowed they never would speak to each
“You should dress according to the
than twenty feet apart and they see other again. The other three partners
weather,
” said the physician. “I try5
saw
that
if
this
course
were
pursued
each other a score of times a day, but
to,
”
replied
the man with a cold. “But'
they meet and pass without the slight­ it would spell ruin. After a lengthy
I
’
m
not
quick
enough to keep up with
conference,
in
which
the
two
dis
­
est sign of recognition. If it becomes
necessary in the course of business putants were called in. separately, the the thermometer.”—Washington Star.
Tapeson—I suppose you’ll spend the
for them to communicate with each proposition was put to them that they
other they do so either by calling a should agree to remain with the firm, season in Europe among the big bugs?
stenographer arid dictating a memo­ of which they were essentially Im­ Tickerly—Unless the market changes
randum or else by being connected portant parts, and should hold com­ I’ll be more likely to spend it out in
on the telephone over their private munication with each other only on Yaphank among the potato bugs —
line. They never speak face to face. business matters and then either in Puck.
A quarter of a century ago these writing or by telephone.
The wife of a college professor warn­
This is the plan that has been fol­ ed him as he went off to officiate at
five partners were young men with
small capital. All of them had been lowed to this day and is likely to be a funeral one rainy day. “Now, John,
employes of the same concern, but pursued to the end. When these two don’t stand with your bare head on
they had their own ideas and believed enemies talk over the telephone they the damp ground; you’ll surely catch,
in them. So they put their money to­ converse with all the polite amiability cold.”
gether and formed a partnership. The of old business associates; they dis­
A smart Irishman was leaning
new business was successful from the cuss prices, business propositions and
against
a post when a funeral proces­
very start. Each man had his own the various problems with which they
sion passed. “Who’s dead?” someone
particular branch to look after and are mutually concerned.
asked. “I don’t know,” answered the
Irishman, “but I presume it’s the gen­
tleman in the coffin.”
Lady—But poverty is no excuse for
a hot summer day or fret and fume
over the, gutteral cries of the mer­ being dirty.. Do you never wash your
chants of the thoroughfares, will’ face? Tramp (with an injured air)—
throw open the window and be lulled Pardon, lady, but I’ve adopted this ’ere
into peaceful slumber through the dry-cleanin’ process as bein’ more
melodious strains of “Rags and Bot­ ’ealthy an’ ’i-geenic.—Punch.
Ascum—Do you think it’s true that
tles,” “Ole Iron,” “Soap Gr.ease” and
Skinner has bought a place for him­
“Juicy Lemons.”
Miss Wenzel has established her self in society? Wise—Oh, no. I’ll
OSTON.—An ’ outdoor school for outdoor school at Washington street bet he’s only leased it, for he’s liable
making musical rag men, hawkers and Massachusetts avenue and has to have to skip out at a moment’s no­
and street venders is the latest educa nearly
­
a score of pupils. The young tice.—Catholic Standard and Times.
tional novelty established in this city. woman is popular with the vendors.
“Here, here”’ yelled the commercial
Miss Caroline E. Wenzel, a fair set­
She got her idea from a trip abroad traveler in the washroom of the vil­
tlement worker and a graduate of last year. Her method is simple. She lage hotel. “You’re using my tooth­
Vassar, is the originator of the idea finds out a man’s business and in­ brush” “Am I?” inquired the rural
and sole instructor. Miss Wenzel be­ structs him accordingly. She sug­ guest. “Gee whillikens! Well, where’s
lieves that if. the voice of the rag man gests expression to fit his wares and th’ one th’t belongs to th’ house?”-—
and peddler must be tolerated it teaches the correct pronunciation of Cleveland Leader.
should issue forth from the throats in these expressions.
did not know you had lost any­
flute-like tones. She confidently be­
Her musical instruction is similar one by death lately.” “I haven’t.”
lieves that once her method becomes to what the musical teachers advo­ “Then why do you wear that black
a fixture a person, instead of feeling cate for the production of a good band on your white sleeve?” “That’s
obliged to slam down the window on I ringing “head tone.”
merely where the conductor caught
hold to help me onto the car this
noon.”—^Houston Post.
Pater—Can you give my daughter
heard the wail of several of the small
| Cronins. Even Polly, the red Durham the comforts to which she has been
cow, which furnishes milk for the accustomed? Suitor—Yes, sir. I’ve
group, seemed affected and mooed in breakfasted at your house, and I’m
certain that I can complain about the
unison with the crying children.
coffee,
read the paper, demand the dis­
The police sergeant hesitated at the
charge
of the. cook and announce that
threshold—then doffed his helmet and
entered. He sought first the physi­ I’ll dine at the-club.—Cleveland Lead-1
er.
HICAGO.—“Come home—twins!” cians, two of them, who talked disin­ Cousin Will and his sister Mary, a
terestedly
with
some
of
the
children.
A mandatory order to a police-
maiden lady timidly disposed, were
jinan of the Hyde Park station flashed One of them said:
“Sergeant, this case Is one most un­ driving the old nag in the buggy when,
from his home to the station at mid­
usual.
It should be brought to the they met a traction engine. The old
night. The policeman obeyed, just as
he has done each year at the sum­ attention of dairymen throughout the mare was of a calm and undemonstra­
mons to “come home” upon the ar­ country. A full-sized male and fe­ tive disposition, but Mary, fearing a
rival of 'new members of the family— male. Mother and offspring doing runaway, insisted on alighting and
’ten of them—during the last ten years. nicely. You might drop a word to walking past the engine. The engineer
stopped the vociferous thing and came
Sergt. Bartholomew Cronin, the the farm journals.”
Then a veterinary surgeon ap­ forward to offer assistance. ‘‘Can I
«gather, left his desk duties at the po­
lice station and rushed to his house peared and joined in the congratula«- lead your horse by the engine,, sir?”
he inquired. “Thank you,” answered
¡at 7019 Indiana avenue. Within were tlons.
Polly, the red Durham cow, had Will. “I can manage the horse very
[signs of activity; lights flashed and
easily, but I would be much obliged
[above the din of excitement could be | given birth to twin calves.
if you would lead the lady by.”—I4p*
pincoU'a.
^Practical” Queries That Puzzled Dad
Ecru linen combined with a dark blue
dotted linen, were verv effectively u ed
in this summery little dress. The linen
was of the handkerchief sort, a fine ma­
terial being necessary for the gathered
skirt
A RESTRAINING BAND.
Its Action Followed by a Voice Thai
Warned.
“Patrick H. McCarren once told me
of a funny incident that happened in
Rome,” said a Brooklyn lawyer. “Mc­
Carren said that on his first visit to
Rome, after he had seen the Coliseum
and the Forum, he visited the Ara
Coell Church, on the left of the Capi-
toline Hill. H^e climbed the grand
stairway leading to the church, the
finest open air stairway in the world.
He pushed back the heavy leather cur­
tain, and, entering, he found a service
in progress. So he put his hat on the
marble floor at his side and took a
seat.
“After ten minutes or so he decided
he would go and reached down for his
hat. But a restraining hand was laid
on his, and he desisted. He knew, of
course, that some churches don’t like
people to leave in the midst of a serv­
ice.
“Ten dr fifteen minutes more passed.
The service still continued. Senator
McCarren got impatient and again
reached for his hat. But again the
unseen hand restrained him from the
rear.
“A little later, however, the senator
quite lost patience. This was, he told
himself an important service, of
.course. Nevertheless, he did not pro­
pose to miss his luncheon, and it would
harm no one if he slipped out quietly.
“So a third time he reached for his
hat, and the invisible hand a third
time detained him. He persevered,
however. The silent hand pushed and
his silent hand pushed against it. But
just as he was conquering in the strug­
gle a voice said in good American:
“Cheese it, boss; that’s my hat
you’re taking.”
Ample Proof.
Lottie—Is your young minister, so
v^ery, very fascinating?
Hattie—Fascinating! Why, lots of
girls in our church have married men
they hated, just to get one kiss from
‘•he rector after the ceremony.—Puck.
Postponed.
Dolly—Why -aren’t you at the cook«
ing school?
Polly—Teacher’s laid up with dys«
pepsia.— Cleveland Leader.
“Old Rags, Old Iron” Set to Music
B
Expected Twin Babies But He Found—
C