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About Just out. (Portland, OR) 1983-2013 | View Entire Issue (Jan. 18, 2008)
JANUARY 18, 2008 Portland Lesbian Choir, a nonaudition community women's chorus, encourages women of any musical skill level to participate in its 21st season of singing, skill build ing and socializing, led by dynamic director Ray Elliot. Rehearsals take place at Ainsworth United Church of Christ. 16:30-8:30 pm Wednesday. 2941 NE Ainsworth St. 503-727-3306. portlandlesbianchar@hotmail.com. www.plchar.org.) Rosa City Gay Freedom Band is a performance group for queers and supportive fnends of varying musical skill lev els with annual fall and spring concerts. Subgroups include the Rose City Swing band and a marching band with flag corps. Come join us! 1503-790-2170. info@rcgfb.org. www.rcgfb.org.) Satori Men's Chorus welcomes new members of all ages and races, regardless of sexual orientation or musical back ground, to join Wednesday rehearsals. No audition neces sary. 1503-242-4244. www.satorichorus.org.) General Asian b Pacific Islander Lesbians and Gays is a non profit community voice for gay, lesbian and bi Asian and Pacific Islanders. Activities include potlucks, recreational outings and cultural events. Friendly environment to meet and connect with other API. (PO Box 12661, Portland, OP 97232. aplg_pdx@yahoo.com J Bad Giris is a social and educational leather and B/D/S/M club for self-identified women with an emphasis on safe ty and education. Workshops, discussions, events and parties. Women of all orientations can connect and ask questions during the Kinky Women's Welcoming Munch at 7 pm every second Tuesday. 1503-972-2233. www.pdxbadgirlsnet.) Bisexual Community Forum is a space to meet people and freely discuss issues relevant to the bi community at 3 Friends Coffeehouse. Everyone is welcome. 17:30 pm first Monday. 201SE 12th Ave. Laury 503-285-4848.) Bookwomen is a lesbian discussion group that meets monthly to share stories, favorite authors, top 10 lists and opinions and reviews of the assigned book. 1503-684-0305. mikkata@comcast.net.) Border Riders Motorcycle Club provides social opportu nities for gay men interested in recreational motorcycle touring and promotes education on safe and legal machin ery. 1503-281-4488. brmcprer@yahoo.com.) Cascade Flyers are gay, lesbian and bi aviators, both pnvate and professional, in Washington, Oregon and southern British Columbia. Dinner meetings in Portland area. 1503-701-7922. casftyers@yahoo.com. www.geocities.com/casflyers.) A Common Bond is a social support network for former or questioning Jehovah's Witnesses who are queer, lacbport land@webtv.net.) Coqsure is a social group for people who were assigned a female sex at birth but identify otherwise (female-to- male, genderqueer, drag king, etc.). First Sunday meetings are open to partners and families of any configuration. 1503-471-1515. groups.yahoo.com/group/coqsure.) Dungeon Men PDX hosts a men's S/M party every other month in a Portland dungeon. Masters and novices always welcome. 1503-281-2076. bighnboy@aracnet.com.) F.A.G. PDX (Femme Affinity Group Portland), a radical activist and social group open to self-identified femmes of all genders, seeks to create solidarity among femmes, promote femme visibility and combat femmephobia in the community at large. Iwww.notsorry.org/fagpdx.) 50+ lesbian social group for women meets on the third Saturday of the month. (4-7 pm. 503-642-3360 or 971-216-1173 sutaytig@aol.com.) STM Pacific NW OR & WA is a social and discussion group for female-to-male trans men. Igroups.yahoo.com/ group/FTMPatificNW.) Funny Ladies, a social group for nice lesbians 35 and older as well as their friends and loved ones, holds potlucks on the second Saturday of each month. Iflataps@yahoo.com.) Gay Men Who Have Lost Their Partners meets at the West Cafe to provide an opportunity for conversation and socializing. The death need not have occurred recently. (7:30 pm second Wednesday. 1201 SW Jefferson St. 503-701-9376.) Genealogy group forming. Gather with other lesbian researchers to trace your family tree and tackle -brickwair female ancestors, ffamhistnw@aol.com.) Happy Ours Productions is a grassroots group dedicat ed to building the visibility, community participation and collective leadership of lesbian women of color through a wide variety of social, networking, consciousness- raising and action-oriented activities, events and projects. fwww.happyoursproductions.com.) Imperial Sovereign Rose Court of Oregon is the oldest gay, lesbian, bi and trans socialrfund-raising organization in the state of Oregon. Meetings are the first two Mondays of each month, fwww.rosecourt.org.) Jewish Gay Men s Group—please call for meeting time and place. 1503-246-5939. efrarmfevi@aol.com.) Keshet is a social connection group for queer Jews and their spouses, partners, significant others and good fnends, whether Jewish or not. It meets monthly for potluck din ners and special events. fDavid 503-226-7079, ext. 14, or Mike 503-331-1111.) Lesbian Garden Club is a group of women who love gar dens and gardening. They exchange plants, seeds, advice and encouragement while having a good time Call for a copy of the newsletter and information about upcoming events. fUnda 503909-2002.) Lesbians with Degrees is a social group that was started for degreed women, but no degree is necessary. Just come and join the fun! Pool parties, Scrabble and more. (Lani 503-233-3557. Join listserv at LesbianswDegrees- subscribe@yahoogroups. com.) Lulu's Pervy Playhouse is a social group for selfidentifying women who are into S/M. Play parties are held on the second Saturday of the month. 1503-231-3992. dykedadi@comcast.net. www.luluspervyplayhouse.org.) Men Over 40 is a small, socially supportive group that meets second and fourth Thursdays. 1503-777-1376.) Night in Black Leather and The Leather Duck Club are the first and third Friday of each month at Gail's Dirty Duck Tavern. (9 pm-midnight. 439 NW Third Ave. 503-224-8446. orieatherfrat@yahoo.com.) Oregon Men Enjoying Naturism is a social organization for gay male naturists/nudists. Social gathering second Saturday of every month, fomenpdx@omenpdx.org. www.omenpdx.org.) PDX FTM is a social group for female-to-male trans men and their significant others, friends, families and allies. lgroups.yahoo.com/group/PDX_FTM.) The gay Pinochle Group meets Sundays at Hobo's. Come play cards and meet the gang. New players always wel come. (6 pm. 120 NW Third Ave. Mike 503-641-7224.) Poder Latino is a nonprofit social community voice group for gay, lesbian, bi and trans people that reaches out to Latinos and Latinas by organizing events and retreats and advocating HIV prevention. Meets every other Monday at Outside In. (6:30 pm. 1030 SW 13th Ave. Hugo 503-997-8615 or Audencio 503-261-5463.) Polyamory Circle is a gathering for folks exploring options beyond monogamy. Discussions include open relation ships, extended families and intentional communities. Everyone is welcome. (7:30 pm third Monday. Laury 503-285-4848.) Portland Leather Alliance is one of the largest pansexual, nonprofit B/D/S/M, leather and fetish lifestyle organizations in the Northwest. Regular social and educational opportuni ties, including KinkFest, Leather Ball and Fall Vendors Fair. fwww.pdxleatheralliance.org.) women. Participants are responsible for providing their own equipment and choosing outings appropriate for their skill and fitness level. All skill levels welcome. ¡503-772-1860. imnoregon@comcast.net. www.geocities.com/ncc1127/ forestpdx.) Gay Men's Walking Group invites gay, bi and questioning men to stroll in various neighborhoods around Portland for fun, friendship and exercise. (10 am Saturday. Tom 503-984-4549.) Gay Women's Golf Group welcomes all levels of players. fwww.turfgirlr.com.) Lesbian Equestrian Group gets together for equestrian activities in the Pacific Northwest. (Denise 503-654-3865. Lynn 503-777-2339. kelrav@rdrop.com.) Out Dancing teaches dancing for same-sex couples at Ankeny Street Studio. Classes for different dance styles start the first Friday of each month: country, swing, tango, cha- cha, etc. Call for schedule. (503-236-5129. out_dancing@ yahoo.com. home.att.net/~outdancing.l OutKayaking, Portland's gay and lesbian sea kayak group, explores the lakes, rivers and bays of northwest Oregon and southwest Washington. (www.outkayaking.org.) PDX Pride Bowling League is recruiting for fun games Friday nights September through April. finfo@pdxpride bowl, con.) PDX NetRippers is Portland's queer soccer organization with competitive indoor soccer, outdoor scnmmages, prac tices for all levels and regional tournaments. (Kyle bendova beckham@gmail.com. www.myspace.com/netrippers.) Portland Gay h Lesbian Bowling Association celebrates 30 years with its 2007-08 season. Meets Sundays from Labor Day through Memonal Day at Hollywood Bowl. Drop- ins welcome anytime. (3:30pm. 4030 NE Halsey St. Mailing address: PO Box 420^4, Portland, OR 97232.503-693-6281. pdxbowl@yahoo.com. www.pdxbowl.com.) Portland Gay Basketball Association welcomes all skill levels. fgroups.yahoo.com/group/PortlandGayBasketball Association.) Whether you're a running novice or a seasoned marathon er, Portland Frontrunners welcomes gay, lesbian, bi and trans people of all abilities and interests. (Gary info@ portlandfrontrunners.org. www.portlandfrontrunners.org.) Portland Leather Men meet every second Saturday for potluck and socializing. Meet men into a leather lifestyle and keep abreast of leather happenings. No dues, no formal organization, no officers or board, just leather socialization for the past 21 years. 1360-896-6665. plm@direcway.com.) Join the Rose City Softball Association, Oregon's largest gay sports organization, for open and women's divisions of slow-pitch softball. Regular season games are played throughout the summer at Gordon Faber Recreational Complex in Hillsboro. All levels of experience are welcome. (4450 NW 229th Ave. www.rosecitysoftball.org.) Portland Lesbian Book Club gathers monthly to chat about a chosen book or to attend selected events. (6.30 pm third Tuesday, groups.yahoo.com/group/portlandlesbian bookclub.) Rosetown Ramblers, Portland's gay and lesbian square dance club, dances at mainstream and plus levels. (PO Box 5352, Portland, OR 9/228-5352. www.rosetown ramblers, com J Portland Lesbian Network organizes brewpub visits, golf events, hiking, kayaking, cycling, Scrabble games and movie nights and keeps you aware of what's going on in the area. fPDXLesbianNetwork-subscribe@yahoogroups.com.) Ruby Red Flippers, a group of gay and lesbian scuba divers in the Portland area, teaches new recruits and takes dives in Tacoma, Hood Canal and other Pacific Northwest waters. (rubyredflippers@yahoo.com. www.rubyredflippers.org.) Portland Metro Prime Timers is a social group for mature gay men and those who appreciate them, coming together for social educational and cultural purposes. (PO Box 5884, Portland, OR 97228. 503-286-4613 or 360-693-5506. pdxprimetimers@yahoo. com. www. geocities, com/ pdxprimetimers.) She Rocks, a supportive rock climbing group for lesbians 18 and older, organizes year-round climbing and training events chosen according to skill level. Monthly meetings are held at Bagdad Pub. (6:30-7:30 pm second Thursday. 3702 SE Hawthorne Blvd, wwwsherocks wetpaint.com.) Rainriders Motorcycle Slub meets weekly at the Roxy Ride your bike or just come meet the group. Everyone welcome. ¡10 am Sunday. 1121 SW Stark St. www.pdx-rrmc.com.) Rose City Discussion Club, the largest and oldest open pansexual/altemative sexuality club in the Northwest, is open to all orientations, fetishes and lifestyles that are safe, sane and consensual. Monthly meetings, social, workshops and newsletter, frcdc@telepat.com. www.rcdc.org.) Sappho Social Club is a group of women 40 years and older building community through social and cultural activ ities. fthesapphosocialclub@yahoo. com.) Social OUTmgs is a social group for all interested in meet ing people and doing activities other than bar-hopping. fkYleinportland@yahoo.com.) Soyboys Vegetarian Men's Group is a fun, social gathering for gay and bi men who are interested in a healthy vegetari an or vegan lifestyle. A variety of activities and monthly potlucks on the last Saturday. (veggieguys@aol.com.) Women of the Rivers, the Portland/Vancouver chapter of Women on Wheels Motorcycle International, encour ages women who love to ride to gather for good times, support and growth in the sport through social meetings, professional seminars, rider training and organized and pickup rides. Monthly meetings at MacTarnahan's Taproom. (6:30 pm second Thursday 2730 NW 31st Ave. www.womenoftherivers.org.) Physical Recreation Adventure Group organizes a variety of activities year round, including hiking, walking, cross-country and down hill skiing, rafting and mountain biking. (PO Box 2201, Portland, OR 97208-2201 www.adventuregroup.org.) Amazon Dragons Paddling Club invites women 16 and older to join Portland's only out lesbian dragon boat team. Be part of the fun and fitness with this dynamic group. (www.amarondragons.org.) Fits Bowling invites you to come join this fun, friendly, alternative league at AMF Pro 300 Lanes. (7 pm Friday. 3031 SE Powell Blvd. 503-234-0237.) The Forest Group outings are cooperative adventures for Just Out s published on the first and third Friday of every month The deadline for submissions is 14 Team Tennis meets Sundays at University of Portland. All levels of play welcome. First time is free, subsequent times are $7. Please join us! f8am-noon. 503-788-8192. team portlandtennis@yahoo. com. I YOUTH Children of Lesbians and Gays Everywhere (COLAGE) is the only international organization specifically supporting young people with sexual minority parents. (colage@lmfamily.org. www.colage.org.) Gay, Lesbian and Straight Education Network (GLSEN) strives to assure that each member of every school community is valued and respected, regardless of sexual orientation or gender identity/expression. (12700 SW North Dakota St., Suite 180 4/129, Tigard, OR 97223. 503-525-1177. glsen@glsenoregon.org. www.glsen oregon.org.) House of MOCHA (Men of Color Healthy 8 Aware) is a group of gay/b/same-gender-loving men of color between 16 and 25 who want to engage in activities, socials and community events among their peers. (Kourtni 503-417-7991. www.brotobropdxorg.) Pride Project brings together Washington County queer and questioning youth to plan and attend monthly social events. Also information, referral and advocacy services in Washington County. (Austin 503-260-5792. austin@pride proiect.org.) Sexual Minority Youth Resource Center (SMYRC) offers support, recreation, counseling and referral to gay, lesbian, bi and trans kids 23 and younger. Drop-in computer access, pool tables and an informal place to hang out. Weekly trans, leadership and art support group meetings. (4-9 pm Wednesday, 4-11 pm Friday. 2100 SE Belmont St. 503-872-9664 www.smyrc.org.) Queerzone identifies and meets the needs of queer homeless youth by providing advocacy, safety, support, resources, referral and a safe place for them to socialize and get the help they need. (6-8 pm Monday, New Avenues for Youth, 812 SW 10th Ave. 6-8 pm Tuesday, Outside In, 1132 SW 13th Ave. 4-11 pm Saturday, Sexual Minority Youth Resource Center, 2100 SE Belmont St.) JUSt|OUtj33 Breaking Up Is Hard to Do Girlfriend exhibits symptoms of Butch Conquest Behavior f D ear M s . B ehavior : My girlfriend, Molly, and I are breaking up but still living together (in separate bedrooms) until our lease BY MERYL COHN A is up next month. We’ve tried to break up six previous times. She usually dumps me until she feels lonely and wants me back. This time the breakup was my idea, and it’s having a strange effect on Molly. She climbs into my bed in the morning and cuddles with me and then wants to have sex. I’ve given in to it twice, and it hasn’t made me feel good. My friends think she’s just doing it to prove that she can have me anytime she wants. They also say the relationship was abusive. When we’re together, Molly takes me for granted, criticizes me and makes me feel unat tractive. But if 1 muster up the courage to let go, she comes at me with her butch charm and wants me more than ever. I want to get out of the relationship, but I’m afraid I’ll stay. How can I get her to let me go? —Too Easy Ms. Behavior D ear T oo E asy : Molly is exhibiting Butch Conquest Behavior, which occurs when hutches switch from feeling relieved and free because the relationship is ending to feeling abandoned because you’re OK with it. The key to successful disentangling is for you to stay as neutral as possi ble. Stay out of intense conversations, but don’t become mean or dismissive, because you’ll only juice her up into some weird seductive state. If she feels rejected or humiliated, or if she can tell that you’re happy to be moving on with your life, she’ll try to “bond” by cuddling and fucking. Emphasize that the breakup is mutual and that you’re joined in a healthy goal. If you can each manage to feel that you’re not being rejected or abandoned, you’ll be able to part without causing each other a lot of pain. Since your tendency is to relent, try to move before your lease is up, even if you have to move your stuff into storage and stay with a friend. The temptation to be warm and cozy with Molly, leading to confusing and mediocre sex, will probably subside once you’re out of her reach. D ear M s . B ehavior : You are the wisest and most fair advice columnist in the world, and whatever your deci sion, I will accept it. My boyfriend of 17 years invited a friend (W) and one of our employ ees whom we are also friends with (K) to have a birthday slumber party for W. He did this without mentioning it to me. When I heard the plans from K, I complained and my boyfriend immediately told K it was off, which made it look like I was being a bitch. So I told him to go ahead and have them over. Then he invited W to sleep in my office rather than downstairs with K (in a separate bed). But my office is private. So I said I don’t want anyone sleeping in my office. My boyfriend thinks 1 was a bitch and doesn’t think he put me in that position by inviting our friends into my space without talking to me about it first. By the way, having friends over unannounced is never a problem for me (sleeping over is OK, too, if it just happens), but unannounced visitors and even phone calls almost always annoy my BF. So my question is: How do I stop looking like a bitch next to my good-time boyfriend? Or am I just truly a bitch? • —Bitchy Bitch Bitch D ear B itchy B itch B itch : If guests in your office really bug you, buy a sofa bed for your living room and request that it become the official sleeping spot for guests. Or you could do what kids in comic strips do with their clubhouses: Post a sign on your office door that says, “Keep Out and That Means You.” Offen when there’s a recurring argument in a relationship, the content of the argument doesn’t matter; it’s about each person wanting to be “right” or in control. Your boyfriend feels that you’re rigid, and you feel that he doesn’t listen or consider your feelings. This makes it unclear whether you’re actually bitchy or just chronically annoyed by a lack of consideration. When an issue comes up repeatedly in your relationship, ask yourself if the issue at stake really matters to you. If it does, try talking about the underlying issue—e.g., that you feel ignored or disrespected—instead of just bickering. Of course, if when you say “slumber party,” you really mean “orgy,” there may be a whole other set of issues that Ms. Behavior hasn’t addressed. © tiled expiration date. Listings are automatically deleted upon expiration .To ensure uninterrupted list days pr-or to publ iiit'on ing please submit updated information at least a month prior to the expiration date Complete list OutReach listings o' up to 50 words are provided free of charge to organizations and groups speed mgs are available online at www justout com icafly serving the sexual minorities community All listings are subject to editing, and inclusion is sub Send listings to Just Out lattn Cafendarl PO Bex 14400 Portland OR 97293-0400 Fax submissions ,ect to space limitations relevance and leceipt by deadline to 503-236 1257 or e-mail lustout List ngs expire o.'ce a year i n July I and submissions 'un from the date receded until the next sched Please type you announcements and include full contact information ¡ustout com Submissions cannot-be accepted over the phone M eryl C ohn is the author of Do What I Say: Ms. Behavior’s Guide to Gay and Lesbian Etiquette. Signed copies are available directly from the author. Send questions or correspondence to msbehavior@aol.com.
