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About Just out. (Portland, OR) 1983-2013 | View Entire Issue (Oct. 7, 2005)
__________ October 7.20Q5 T ________ 35 ADVICE .............. V.............. Sl’l R Metro: Spirituality Ainsworth United Church of Christ is a multicultural, multiracial, open and affirming. Just peace congregation (2941 NE Ainsworth St 503-284-8767 ) Anawim Community of gay men meets weekly for Chnstian meditation and prayer. (7:30 pm Thursday 503-281-0722.) Atkinson Memorial Church a Unitarian Universalist church, provides a spintual home for those looking for a liberal-minded, supportive and caring congregation in Oregon City. (10 30 am Sunday. 710 Sixth St. 503-656-7296 ) Bridgeport United Church of Christ is a joyful community working for justice, nurtunng peace and exploring and celebratjpg our progressive Chnstian faith. We are queer and straight, multicultural and multiracial, and our children are valued members Good coffee, cool people, hot church! (11 am Sunday 621 NE 76th Ave 503-258-0992 www.bndgeportucc.org.) Community of Welcoming Congregations (10 am Sunday. 7.30 am Tuesday and Thursday 7:30 pm Wednesday meditation 2025 SE Yamhill St. 503-232 8064 www.nichiren-shu.org/portland.) faith that extends a warm welcome to all people (10 am Sunday 4775 N Lombard St 503-289-7843 www.upumc.net.) Peace Church of the Brethren is a welcoming Waverly Haight* United Church of Christ is open and affirming with worship, children's school and child care (10 am summer. 11 am school year 3300 SE Woodward St 503-238 1337 pastor@waveriyucc org. www.wavertyucc.org) congregation (11 am Sunday 12727 SE Market St. 503-254-6380.) Portland Center for Spiritual Growth is a center for worship, growth and leadership that adheres to an all-inclusive spiritual philosophy similar to 12-step. Unity and Religious Science. Impromptu wedding ceremonies available. (503-777-0727 www.portlandcenter org.) Portland Radical Faeries meet twice a month with potlucks and circles at the full moon and the new moon Open to all men seeking alternative spintual growth and community. Coffee hours start 9:30 am Saturdays at 3 Friends Coffeehouse. 201 SE 12th Ave. (503-235-0826. otter9pcen.com.) Rose City Park Presbyterian Church a member of the Community of Welcoming Congregations and the Covenant Network of Presbytenans. is a vibrant, inclusive community of faith All God's children are welcome to join in our life and worship. (10 am Sunday 1907 NE 45th Ave. www. rosecityparkpres. org) Congregation is an open and liberal religious community offering intergenerational services and religious education for youth and adults. We welcome gay. lesbian, bi and trans members and nurture spiritual growth living by Umtanan Universalist principles. (5 pm Sunday 3300 SE Woodward St. 503 777-3704 www wyeast.pnwd.uua.org.) Zion United Church of Christ an open and affirming congregation, is open to gay. lesbian, bi. trans and heterosexual people who wish to worship in a Christ-centered, warm, canng, multiage/race/ cultural faith community (11 am Sunday 110:30 am summer! 2025 NE23rd Ave.. Gresham. 503-665-8741) Central Oregon: Spirituality Seventh-Day Adventist Kinship is a support United Church of Christ Congregational is organization for former and current Adventists who are queer as well as their family and fnends (PO Box 49375, Sarasota. FL 34230-6375. 866-732-5677 office@sdakmship.org www sdakmship org.) an open and affirming congregation in The Dalles (9 20 am adult Sunday school. 10:30 am worship [930 am summer!. 111 E Fifth St 541-296-2909 ucccongl@netcnct. net. www forministry. com/usorucofcucocc.) Congregation P’nai Or (Faces of Light) is a Soka Gakkai International a huge world peace vibrant, egalitanan. Jewish Renewal congregation in Portland. Meets several times a month at St Mark Presbyterian Church. (9750 SW Terwilliger Blvd 503-248-4500 www pnaiorpdx .org) Buddhist organization, holds monthly Rainbow Group meetings to talk about Buddhism and where queers can become familiar with a philosophy that has always had a place for everyone (1805 SE Ankeny St 503-230-1038. sgi-usa oregon.org.) a welcoming congregation, offers Sunday service and children's religious education. (10:30 am. 1133NE 181st Ave., Gresham 503-665-2628 office@eastrose.org. www.eastrose.org.) Eckankar—Religion of the Light and Sound of God holds worship services and maintains a library of materials Leam how you can work daily with the Divine Spirit in your own life (10 am Sunday. 7904 SE Milwaukie Ave. 503-233-1595 www eckankar. org.) Elevation a gay Chnstian rock band, invites you to join us fof energetic, inspiring jams and powerful, spiritual messages at Metropolitan Community Church of Portland. (6 pm Sunday 2400 NE' Broadway 503-281-8868.) Enneagram Community of Portland offers mentonng. therapy, spiritual direction, classes, workshops and retreats. (enneagrampdx@aol com. www. enneagramportland. com.) Faith United Methodist Church is a welcoming congregation that values and affirms the sacredness of all people. We invite and encourage everyone to find a place in the family of God (10:15 am Sunday 27400 SE Stark St.. Troutdale 503-661-4520) First Congregational United Church of Christ is an open and affirming congregation in the liberal Chnstian tradition. Church school and nursery care. (10:25 am Sunday. 1126 SW Park Ave. 503-228-7219) First Congregational United Church of Christ of Hillsboro is an open and affirming congregation explicitly welcoming everyone into its Christian community, fellowship and worship Bible and book study groups. Sunday school and nursery care. (10:30 am Sunday. 494 E Main St 503-648-4341. www.hillsboro-ucc.org.) spintual growth (10 am Sunday 111 W 39th St- Vancouver The Rev Kathleen Verigin 360-573-2626 www. abundant-life center org.) St. Andrew Catholic Church invites all to join a Longview United Methodist Church s diverse faith community for prayer and fellowship (9:30 am Sunday: Noon Spanish language service 806 NE Alberta St 503-281-4429.) welcoming and reconciling. (10 am Sunday 2851 30th Ave . Longview 360-425-4927) St. Brigid Celtic Anabaptist Community is a Shepherd welcomes you Bible study follows morning worship (1030 am and 6.30 pm Sunday. 2200 Broadway St., Vancouver The Rev Harriet Barshofsky 360-695-1480.) First Congregational United Church of Christ has been an open and affirming Metropolitan Church of the Gentle newly developing group connecting ancient traditions and future visions to manifest liberty, peace and justice Now meeting for discussion, study and meditation (Sarah 503-757-7545 www stbngidcac co nr) Michael Servitus Unitarian Universalist St. James Lutheran Church a Reconciled in Fellowship a Welcoming Congregation, provides Christ congregation, welcomes all people for traditional, liturgical worship where we experience God's reconciling love that sets all people free (9 and 11 am Sunday 1315 SW Park Ave 503-227-2439 www st/ameslutheranportiand org.) a home for the liberal religious spirit (9.30 and 11:15am Sunday 4505 E 18th St.. Vancouver 360-695-1891) welcoming all people since 1863. (12:10pm Wednesday and 7:45 and 10 am Sunday. Sunday school and child care at 10 am 1432SW 13th Ave 503-223-6424) SisterSpirit offers women's spirituality celebrations, discussion groups, a drumming circle, workshops and classes Schedule of events available All women are welcome (Suite 102, 3430 SE Belmont St Mailing address PO Box 9240 Portland. OR 97207. 503-736-3297 sistersp@teleport. com.) Unitarian Universalist Community Church of Washington County is an open and affirming liberal and affirming liberal religious community offering a wide range of programs to nurture spiritual growth, community and social justice. Sunday service 9 and 11 am. (1011 SW 12th Ave. 503-228-6389 www. firstunitarianportland. org.) religious community offenng a variety of enrichment programs in addition to community and social action opportunities (9 and 11 am Sunday 22785 NW Birch St.. Hillsboro 503-648-1720 www.uuccwc.org.) University Park United Methodist Church is a small, diverse, open and progressive community of Philip Neri Catholic Church celebrates an affirming Mass followed by a social. (7.30 pm Friday Paulist Center. 2408 SE 16th Ave. 503-231-4955 ) Integrity is a group of sexual mfoority Episcopalians and friends. Various locations throughout Oregon (Steven Norcross or Bruce 503-286-9 111. brucepdxor@comcast.net www.mtegntyusa.org.) Abundant Life Center assists the community in congregation since 1992. extending God's extravagant welcome to all people, no matter who they are or where they are on life's journey (1220 NE 68th St . Vancouver 360-693 (476 www vancouverucc. org.) First Unitarian Church of Portland is an open Gay and Lesbian Outreach (GALO) of St Washington: Spirituality Southminster Presbyterian Church is an active member of the Community of Welcoming Congregations Sunday school, nursery care, classes, community service activities and events for all ages and interests (9 am Sunday chape! service. 10 am Sunday mam worship service. 12250 SW Denney Road, Beaverton. 503-644-2073 staff@southmin.com www.southmm.com.) St. Stephen's Episcopal Church has been (COLAGE) is tlie only St. Luke's Episcopal Church has welcomed all people since 1853. Traditional but never stuffy (English: 8 and 10:30 am Sunday Spanish: I pm Sunday. Child care at 10:30 am 426 E Fourth Plain Blvd., Vancouver The Rev John Allen 360-696-0181 www. stlukeschurch. info.) Willamette Valley: Spirituality First Congregational Church United Church of Christ is an open and affirming congregation offenng worship and church school Child care provided and wheelchair accessible (930 am Sunday learning hour, 10:30 am worship 700 Mahon St NE. Salem 503 363 3660) Metropolitan Community Church Two Rivers is a Chnstian church with primary outreach in the sexual minorities community (6.30 pm Sunday 1166 Oak St. Eugene.) Swo0t Spirit Metropolitan Community Church holds services at the American Legion Building in Salem. (11 am Sunday 4774 Lilac Lane NE. Ken Kerr 503 315-7923 salemsweetspint@aol com .) offers support, recreation, counseling and referral to gay. lesbian, bi and trans kids 23 and younger Drop-tn computer access. jxol tables and an informal piece to hang out. Weekly trans. Metro: Youth c^rtottorT™ Interfaith Spiritual Center houses spiritual specifically supporting young people with sexual directors from various world religious traditions, who are available for guidance, classes and retreats. (Second Floor, 3910 SE 11th Ave 503-233-2026. ext 3. wwwmterfaithsptritualcentercom.) minority parents. (cotageBImramiy.oqj. leadership and art support group meetings (4-9 pm Wednesday. 4 fl pm Friday 2100 SE Balmont St 503-872-9664 wwwsmyrc.org) wwwoofegB.apJ Eastern Oregon: Youth Networit «UBDttlm" assure that each LMuf ofSesJport and advocacy^g^*'* Koinonia Catholic Community is a member of every school community fo valued and progressive, small faith community that gathers weekly to celebrate Eucharist at Bridgeport United Church of Christ. A welcoming congregation. Catholic in tradition and Ecumenical in membership (6 pm Sunday 621 NE 76th Ave 503-699-0473 www komomacommunity org) respected, regardless of sexual orientation or gender ktenWy/wpreeeion. (12700 SW North Dakota St. Suite 100 »129. Tigard. OR 97223 lesbian, bi. trans and questionfog youth fo Eastern Oregon. (1021 SW Fifth Ave . Ontario. CtateMe in operates a dinfc for anyone who can't Metanoia Peace Community United qtieWv for the Oregon Health Plan as we« as needle Methodist Church is a "house church" that exchange services that include those wtio inject brings gay and straight together Daily morning prayer and Sunday evening worship (503-281-3697 www tearsoup com/metanoia) hormones Provide Mnattfonal housing for youth 20 and younger and for those MV-poafove and younger m|M> fmk oners education, suppon ana advocacy to gay, lesbian, bi, trans and questioning youth in Vancouver. Meets every Tuesday fo the basement of Youth House. (6-8 pm. 1112 Columbia than 23. Need volunteers of aS age» (IOam-6pm StJohn 380-695-1325.) 503-525-1177 gNen@gNenongon.org. wwwgNenoragon.org.) 541-889-3119 or 868-248 8369. eodl9aoc6.org _ w-Axi,: A ...z MM. QOCti. Ofy. / Washington: Youth Mondtry-FrtrNy. 1132 SW 13th Am. 503-535-3800 rw*nropoirtan wOinvnunffty wviw> vn or Portland holds ecumenical Sunday morning worship services at 9 and 11 am Sunday school for children is held during the 11 am service (2400 NE Broadway 503-281 8868 mfoOmccporttand com www mccportiand com) www outaidem oig ' Willamette Valley: Youth Pride Prefeet bongs together Washington County queer and questioning youth to pen and attend monthly social events. Also information, referral and advocacy services fo Washington County (Austin 503-260-5792 austm@pddeprofect.org.) How long do I have to tolerate the cold shoulder? Wy'east Unitarian Universalist an interfaith ministry of spintual congregations in Oregon and Southwest Washington that welcome and affirm people of all sexual onentations. provides pastoral care, advocacy, education and consultation. (503-665-8741 2025 NE 23rd St.. Gresham Mailing address: PO Box 14948. Portland. OR 97293 www welcommgcongregations. org) Eastroae Fellowship Unitarian Universalist My cheating heart QwMliosdnB Youth Qreupfcw^qea 13 tn 18 offers support information and fun m Eugene Free conftdenbei. aduit-fodHated. (Drop in 4-6 pm Fndey. Nichiren Buddhiat Temple of Portland offers Arruvon Community Center. 2700 HUyard St several weekly gatherings Everyone welcome1 541-684-3466) know the reasons and be able to discuss them persuasively. You’re in no position to make demands. Also, if your knee still hurts, please get a new physical therapist. D ear M s . B ehavior : Last month, I cheated on my girlfriend, Jane, who had been cold and distant for a long time. After two weeks of sneaking around with my physical therapist (who was helping with my knee injury), I felt too guilty and confessed everything. Jane and 1 have decided to stay together and go to couple s counseling. The problem is that even though 1 have apologized and groveled and begged for forgiveness, Jane is treating me badly. She growls at me instead of speaking; she grunts instead of answering. She often gives me the cold shoulder. I’m willing to try to work on our relationship, which was damaged even before the affair. But how long do I have to lie down and take her anger at me? When is it OK for me to stand back up and demand that Jane treats me with respect? —Willa D ear M s . B ehavior : . I ; 1 i D ear W illa : It’s only been a month since you told Jane that you cheated on her and you’re already whining about her lack of forgiveness? Hello? Didn’t you touch your physical therapist s vagina? Some people never get over a partner’s infidelity at all, much less within a 30-day limit imposed by the cheating party. It may be true that your relationship was in trouble before you did the deed, but if you don’t develop more sympathy for Jane, she’s never going to be able to let go of her anger. Look at it like this: Jane wasn’t necessarily having a good time in the relationship, either, but she didn’t have the relief of fucking someone else. You did. You didn’t warn Jane that you were going to do it, or ask her if she wanted to do it, too, or say that you wanted an bpen relationship; you just fucked someone else. Then you came back and confessed and expected Jane to just get over it, as if your apology somehow canceled out your actions. That’s optimistic but rather short-sighted on your part. Groveling isn’t the point; you need to make a clear decision about whether you truly want to be in a monogamous relationship, and if you do, you need to accept your partner’s hurt feelings and anger and see if the two of you can get past it. Get to couples counseling as quickly as you can. If you love Jane and want to save the relationship, you’d better I’ve had several dates with a guy named Chuck who works at a restaurant with me. I like him a lot, but things haven’t progressed to a physical level. The problem is his skin. I don’t mean that he has a red rash or some blemishes; I’m talking about pus-filled whiteheads that need rupturing. I doubt he washes his face or uses any acne treatment. Last week he was sitting on my couch and it seemed like something might happen, but I got distracted by wanting to tell him about his face. What’s the etiquette around telling someone he needs to go and pop a zit? Anyway, he works around food, which makes it worse. Can 1 advise Chuck of this problem and still seduce him? —Clear'Skinned and Interested D ear C lear -S kinned and I nterested : i I j 1 Unless Chuck has an unusually sturdy ego, you’ll have to choose between seducing him and helping with his facial hygiene. Very few people could give someone advice on skin eruptions and still manage to get his panties off. If Chuck becomes your boyfriend, you could share tips about cosmetics and show him your facial cleanser. If he doesn’t take the hint, you might choose the right moment to tenderly apply it for him. But it’s unlikely that you’ll get there from where you are, isn’t it? Since at the moment Chuck is just a casual date, there’s no civilized way to discuss his giant oozing pimple (unless you could find something mutually erotic in trying to burst it for him). So, this means next time you find yourself sitting next to him on the couch, you’ll have to ask yourself a serious question: Would 1 rather be Chuck’s aesthetician or suck his dick ?m I M eryl C ohn is the author of Do What 1 Say: Ms. Behavior’s Guide to Gay and Lesbian Etiquette. Signed copies are available drrectly from the author. Send questions or correspondence to msbehavtor@aol. com.
