ADVICE
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SPIRITUALITY
Metro: Spirituality
Anawim Community of gay men meet? weekly for
Christian meditation and prayer (7:30 pm Thursday
503 281 0722.)
Atkinson Memorial Church a Unitarian
Universalist church, provides a spiritual home for those
looking for a liberal-minded, supportive and caring
congregation in Oregon City. (10:30 am Sunday 710
Sixth St. 503-656-7296)
Bridgeport United Church of Christ is a
community of progressive, political people explonng and
celebrating the Christian faith. We are sexual minority
and straight, multicultural and multiracial, and our
children are valued members. (10:30 am Sunday
621 NE 76th Ave 503-258 0992
www bridgeportucc. org.)
Congregation P'nai Or (Faces of Light) is a vibrant,
egalitarian, Jewish Renewal congregation in Portland.
Meets several times a month at Portland State
University Campus Ministries. (PO Box 42187,
Portland. OP 97242 0187. 503-248 4500
www.pnaiorpdx org.)
Eastrose Fellowship Unitarian Universalist a
welcoming congregation, offers Sunday service and
children's religious education. (10:30 am. 1133 NE
181st Ave., Gresham 503-665-2628.
office&eastroseorg www eastrose org.)
Eckankar—Religion of the Light and Sound of
God holds worship services and maintains a library of
materials. Learn how the Divine Spirit works throughout
your own life in today's world. (10 am Sunday. 7904 SE
Milwaukie Ave. 503-233-1595. www eckankar org.)
Enneagram Community of Portland offers
mentoring, therapy, spiritual direction, classes,
workshops and retreats. (enneagrampdx@aol com
www. enneagramportland. com.)
Faith United Methodist Church is a welcoming
congregation that values and affirms the sacredness of
all people We invite and encourage everyone to find a
place in the family of God. (10:15am Sunday
27400 SE Stark St., Troutdale 503-661 4520 )
Seventh-Day Adventist Kinship is a support
organization for former and current Adventists who are
queer as well as their family and friends (PO Box
49375, Se-asota. FL 34230-6375 866 732-5677
office@sdakmship org www sdakmship org)
Soul Quest -a men's group exploring soul, spirit,
inner transformation and authentic living—will meet
weekly starting this spring. (Lincoln 503 730-2347.
info&soulquests. com.)
Southminster Presbyterian Church is an active
member of the Community of Welcoming
Congregations. Sunday school, nursery care, classes,
adult Sunday school. 10 30 am worship (930 am
summer] 111 EFifth St 541 2962909
ucccongl@netcnct. net
www formimstry.com/usorucofcucocc )
Washington: Spirituality
Abundant Life Center assists the community in
spiritual growth. (10am Sunday 111 W39th St..
Vancouver The Pev Kathleen Vengin 360-573-2626
www abundant-life-center org.)
First Congregational United Church of Christ
community service activities and events for all ages and
interests. (9 am Sunday chapel service. 10 am Sunday
mam worship service 12250 SW Denney Poad.
Beaverton. 503 644-2073. staff@southmm.com
www.southmin com.)
'
has been an open and affirming congregation since
1992. extending God's extravagant welcome to all
people, no matter who they are or where they are on
life's journey. (1220 NE 68th St., Vancouver
360-693-14 76 www. vancouverucc. org.)
St. Andrew Catholic Church invites all to join a
diverse faith community for prayer and fellowship
(9 30 am Sunday. Noon Spanish language service
806 NE Alberta St. 503281 4429.)
Longview United Methodist Church is
welcoming and reconciling. (10 am Sunday 2851 30th
Ave. Longview 360-425-4927)
St. James Lutheran Church a Reconciled in
in Vancouver welcomes you. (10 30 am and 6:30 pm
Sunday worship Bible study follows morning worship
2200 Broadway St The Pev Harriet Barshofsky
360-695-1480 )
Metropolitan Church of the Gentle Shepherd
Christ congregation, welcomes all people for traditional,
liturgical worship where we experience God's
reconciling love that sets all people free (9 and 11 am
Sunday 1315 SW Park Ave 503-2272439
www stjameslutheranportland org.)
St. Stephen's Episcopal Church has been
welcoming all people since 1863 (12:10 pm
Wednesday and 7:45 and 10 am Sunday. Sunday
school and child care at 10 am 1432 SW 13th Ave.
503223-6424)
SisterSpirit offers women's spirituality celebrations,
discussion groups, a drumming circle, workshops and
classes. Schedule of events available. All women are
welcome (Suite 102. 3430 SE Belmont St. Mailing
address: PO Box 9246. Portland. OP 97207
503-736-3297 sistersp&teleport com.)
Michael Servitus Unitarian Universalist
Fellowship, a Welcoming Congregation, provides a
home for the liberal religious spirit. (9:30 and 11:15am
Sunday 4505 E 18th St.. Vancouver 360695-1891.)
Willamette Valley: Spirituality
First Congregational Church. United Church of
Chnst is an open and affirming congregation offering
worship and church school. Child care provided and
wheelchair accessible (9 30 am Sunday learning hour,
10:30 am worship. 700 Marion St NE. Salem.
503 363-3660)
Trinity Episcopal Cathedral a welcoming and
Metropolitan Community Church Two Rivers is
affirming congregation, invites all to worship services
and ongoing programs in spiritual development,
community outreach, music and arts education. (8 am
Sunday Pite I chapel service. 10 am Sunday Rite II
cathedral service. 147 NW 19th Ave 503 222 9811.
www. trinity-episcopal org.)
a Christian church with primary outreach in the sexual
minorities community (6:30pm Sunday 1166 Oak St..
Eugene.)
First Congregational United Church of Christ
is an open and affirming congregation in the liberal
Christian tradition. Church school and nursery care.
(10 25 am Sunday. 1126 SW Park Ave. 503-228-7219 )
First Congregational United Church of Christ
of Hillsboro is an open and affirming congregation
explicitly welcoming everyone into its Christian
community, fellowship and worship, Bible and book
study groups, Sunday school and nursery care
(10 30 am Sunday 494 E Main St 503-648-4341.
www hHlsboro-ucc. org.)
First Unitarian Church of Portland is an open and
affirming liberal religious community offering a wide
range of programs to nurture spiritual growth,
community and social justice. Sunday service 9 and
11 am. (1011 SW 12th Ave 503-228 6389
www firstunitarianportland org.)
Gay and Lesbian Outreach (GALO) of St Philip
Neri Catholic Church celebrates an affirming Mass
followed by a social. (7:30 pm Friday Paulist Center.
2408 SE 16th Ave. 503 2314955 )
Integrity is a group of sexual minority Episcopalians
and friends. Various locations throughout Oregon.
(Steven Norcross or Bruce 503-2869111.
brucepdxor@comcast. net. www integrityusa org.)
Interfaith Spiritual Center houses spiritual
directors from various world religious traditions, who are
available for guidance, classes and retreats. (Second
Floor. 3910 SE 11th Ave 503 233-2026. ext 3.
www interfaithspintualcenter com.)
Koinonia Catholic Community is a progressive,
small faith community that gathers weekly to celebrate
Eucharist at Bridgeport United Church of Chnst.
A welcoming congregation. Catholic in tradition and
Ecumenical in membership. (6 pm Sunday 621 NE 76th
Ave 503-699-0473 www komoniacommunityorg)
Metanoia Peace Community United Methodist
Church is a “house church’ that brings gay and
straight together. Daily morning prayer and Sunday
evening worship. (503 28T3697.
www. tearsoup com/metanoia)
Metropolitan Community Church of Portland
holds ecumenical Sunday morning worship services at
9 and 11 am Sunday school for children is held during
the 11 am service (2400 NE Broadway 503-281-8868
mfo@mccportland com. www mccportland com)
Nichiren Buddhist Temple of Portland offers
several weekly gathenngs Everyone welcome! (10 am
Sunday, 7 30 am Tuesday and Thursday 7 30 pm
Wednesday meditation 2025 SE Yamhill St
503-232-8064 www nichiren-shu org/portland)
Peace Church of the Brethren is a welcoming
congregation. (11 am Sunday 12727 SE Market St
503 254 6380)
Portland Center for Spiritual Growth is a center
for worship, growth and leadership that adheres to an
all inclusive spintual philosophy similar to 12 step. Unity
and Religious Science Impromptu wedding ceremonies
available. (5O3-777-O727 wwwportlandcenterorg.)
Portland Radical Faeries meet twice a month with
potlucks and circles at the full moon and the new moon.
Open to all men seeking alternative spiritual growth and
community Coffee hours start 9 30 am Saturdays at
3 Friends Coffeehouse. 201 SE 12th Ave
(503 235-0826 otter@pcer com )
Unitarian Universalist Community Church of
Washington County is an open and affirming liberal
religious community offenng a vanety of enrichment
programs in addition to community and social action
opportunities. (9 and 11 am Sunday 22785 NW Birch
St.. Hillsboro 503-648-1720 www uuccwc.org.)
University Park United Methodist Church is a
small, diverse, open and progressive community of faith
that extends a warm welcome to all people. (10 am
Sunday 4775 N Lombard St 503289-7843
wwwupumc.net.)
Waverly Heights United Church of Christ is
open and affirming with worship, children’s school and
child care. (10 am summer. 11 am school year
3300 SE Woodward St 503-238 1337.
pastor@waveriyucc.org www waveriyucc org.)
Wy'east Unitarian Universalist Congregation is
an open and liberal religious community offering
intergenerational services and religious education for
youth and adults. We welcome gay, lesbian, bi and trans
members and nurture spintual growth living by Unitarian
Universalist principles. (5 pm Sunday. 3300 SE
Woodward St. 503 777-3704
www wyeast pnwd uua org.)
Zion United Church of Christ an open and
affirming congregation, is open to gay. lesbian, bi. trans
and heterosexual people who wish to worship in a
Christ centered, warm, caring, multiage/race/cultural
faith community. (11 am Sunday (10:30 am summed.
2025 NE 23rd Ave. Gresham. 503665-8741.)
Central Oregon: Spirituality
United Church of Christ Congregational is an
open and affirming congregation in The Dalles (9 20 am
YOUTH
Metro: Youth
Edie Sedgwick pays homage to Julia
Roberts and other celebs April 13 at
Berbati's.
4-11 pm Friday. 2100 SE Belmont St 503-872-9664
www.smyrc.org.)
Eastern Oregon: Youth
Gay, Lesbian and Straight Education Network
(GLSEN) strives to assure that each member of every
Eastern Oregon Center for Independent
school community is valued and respected, regardless
of sexual orientation or gender identity/expression
(12700 SW North Dakota St . Suite 180 4129. Tigard.
OP 97223. 503525-1177. glsen@glsenoregon.org.
www.glsenoregon.org.)
Living offers support and advocacy to gay. lesbian, bi.
trans and questioning youth in Eastern Oregon
(1021 SW Fifth Ave. Ontano. 541-889-3119 or
8662488369 eocil@eocil.org. www.eocil.org.)
Outside In operates a clime for anyone who can't
qualify for the Oregon Health Plan as well as needle
exchange services that include those who inject
hormones. Provide transitional housing for youth 20
and younger and for those HIV-positive and younger
than 23. Need volunteers of all ages. (10 am-6 pm
Monday-Friday. 1132SW 13th Ave 503-5353800.
www outsidern.org )
Pride Project brings together Washington County
queer and questioning youth to plan and attend monthly
social events. Also information, referral and advocacy
services in Washington Cqunty. (Molly 503 260-5792
molly@prideprofect org)
Washington: Youth
Triple Point offers education, support and advocacy
to gay. lesbian, bi. trans and questioning youth in
Vancouver. Meets every Tuesday in the basement of
Youth House. (6-8 pm. 1112 Columbia St John
360 695-1325)
Willamette Valley: Youth
Gay, Lesbian, Bi. Transgender and
Questioning Youth Group for ages 13 to 18 offers
Sexual Minority Youth Resource Center
support, information and fun in Eugene. Free,
confidential, adult faciktated (Drop in 4-6 pm Friday
Amazon Community Center. 2700 Hilyard St.
(SMYRC) offers support, recreation, counseling and
541 684-3466)
referral to gay. lesbian, bi and trans kids 23 and
younger Drop-in computer access, pool tables and an
informal place to hang out Weekly trans, leadership
and art support group meetings (4-9 pm Wednesday.
Lesbian, Gay, Bisexual, Transgender Youth
Group for ages 25 and younger meets every Monday
in Eugene (5 pm Koinonia Center, 1414 Kincaid St
541 346-1134)
Dykes
on
dicks
Lesbian with
boyfriend
tries to sort her feelings
D ear M s . B ehavior :
members, trip« xl.com/
I’m a 20-year-old-
up_sappho _society/
female who, after
idenrity.html, and read
struggling with the
her article, “Why I’m
eternal am-I-bisexual-
Still a Lesbian Despite
or-leshian question
the Man in My Bed.”
from ages 14 to 17,
finally came out as
D ear M s . B ehavior :
completely gay. I’d been
I’ve been seeing a
with guys, hut they
woman for eight
were screwed-up
months. She’d never
“relationships,” and I
been with women
Ms. Behavior before, but 1 ignored my
was never satisfied,
emotionally or
fears and decided to
by Meryl Cohn
otherwise.
“live in the moment.”
Shortly before turning 18,1 met a
Her family is conservative. It’s
wonderful girl, and we had an
hard for her not to tell them about us.
incredible relationship for two years.
We have a good time cooking,
We’re now close friends. After we
gardening, watching movies or
broke up, I went on a few dates, but no
hanging out with my friends. She has
one caught my interest until “J.”
told several friends but doesn’t -invite
Problem is, “J” is a guy. He asked
me to hang out with them, which
me out, and I said yes for lack of
hurts my feelings. She says she wants
anything to do. We got along well,
“alone time” with her friends.
and despite few shared interests, we
She has a hard time dealing with
clicked. I fell in love with “J.”
her emotions, doesn’t like to discuss
I AM happy and I DO love “J”
hard issues and is very independent.
but don’t feel like I’m bisexual. In my
1 am honest, respectful and
heart of hearts, 1 feel totally gay.
communicate. Cheating is not an
I don’t feel the emotional connection
option for me.
with him as I do women, but it’s a
Last weekend was my birthday.
g(Kxl relationship. My friends don’t
She went with three friends t<*) Tahoe
understand.
to ski, which she didn’t mention
I’m not trying to label myself so
until a week before. It hurt me
much as sort my feelings and figure
because 1 wanted to spend my
out what to do. I love “J” and am
birthday with her. She said that it
happy...just confused. I’d never want
was a difficult choice and that she
to be with another man, and even
was fearful of losing me. Lately, she
now, despite my happiness, I still miss
doesn’t acknowledge me as she used
the emotional connection, the
to and wants her independence.
softness...everything about women.
Maybe 1 need to be with someone
Is this common? What should 1 do?
who wants to be in a serious, honest,
—“Lesbian” with Boyfriend caring relationship. But it’s hard to
think of anyone else because 1 love
D ear “L esbian ” with B oyfriend :
her. Am I settling?
Once in a while, a real dyke falls
—MT
in love with a boy. So what?
D ear MT:
Eventually you’ll view it as a momen
tary aberration, a strange part of your
Do you really need to ask if you’re
life, like writing with your left hand
settling? This relationship will
continue to hurt you because you and
for a while.
It happens to straight women, too;
your girlfriend want different things.
they unwittingly fall for cute lesbians
It sucks to be with someone who
is closeted. Closeted girlfriends don’t
at work or on the next mat in their
like to do fun things, like make out
Pilates class. Usually the relationship
lasts a few months, and then they
on the beach or have sex in their
childhtxxl bedroom in their parents’
wander back to their happy hetero
house. They don’t bring you to office
lives (perhaps somewhat enriched by
parties or family weddings and pull
the scent of a woman).
you into the bathroom to kiss you.
Does this mean they’re really
bisexual and deluding themselves?
They usually littk a certain self-
Not necessarily. It means that human
respect and self-acceptance, and that
experience is broad and varied and
problem comes through in their
can’t be predicted.
work, their friendships and their
If you’re happy and in love with
relationships.
“J,” why change anything? “Happy
Your girlfriend doesn’t seem
and in love” is a fantastic way to feel.
capable of the three things you value:
Enjoy it while it lasts. If it starts to
honesty, respect and communication.
feel unfulfilling, you’ll move on to
Lots of lesbians want w'hat you want
the next right thing, probably a nice
anil would appreciate you. Ms.
juicy woman. (You’ll especially .
Behavior advises you to throw her
appreciate her breasts and her soft
back into the murky waters and find
lips, having missed them for so long.)
a better fishing hole. JM
You’re not alone; even lesbian
M eryl C ohn is the author of Do
sexpert and psychotherapist JoAnn
Loulan—who happened to have
What I Say: Ms. Behavior’s Guide to
coined the phrase “Lesbian Bed
Gay and Lesbian Etiquette. Signed
copies are available directly from the
Death”—fell in love with a man
recently. Do a Gixigle search with
author. Send questions or
her name, or check out
correspondence to msbehavun@aal.com.