july 16» 2004 ?
ADVICE
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SPIRITUALITY
Metro: Spirituality
Ainsworth United Church of Christ is a m ulti
racial, m ulticultural, open and affirm ing church. Sunday
w orship is at 10 am; church school fo r children runs
concurrently. (2941 NE Ainsworth St 503284-8767.
aucc@teleport com.) (7 /0 4 )
Anawim Community o f gay men meets w eekly for
C hristian m editation and prayer. (7.30 pm Thursday
503-281-0722.) (7 /0 4 )
Bridgeport United Church of Christ is a commu
nity o f progressive, political people explonng and cele
brating the Chnstian faith. W e are sexual minonty and
straight, m ulticultural and m ultiracial, and our children
are valued members (1030 am Sunday 621 NE 76th
Ave 503-258-0992. www bndgeportucc org.) (7 /0 4 )
City Church Portland's "oldest gay-affirm ing
C hristian church," offers a spirit-driven church for
today's diverse generations. (10 am Sunday commu
nion and worship service. 6 30 pm Sunday worship
service 3830 SE62nd Ave. 503-775-5024 ) (7 /0 4 )
Congregation P'nai Or (Faces of Light) is a vibrant,
egalitarian, Jewish Renewal congregation in Portland
Meets several times a month at Portland State University
Campus M inistries (PO Box 42187. Portland. OR
97242-0187 503-248-4500 www.pnaiorpdx org.) (7/04)
Eastrose Fellowship Unitarian Universalist a
welcom ing congregation, offers Sunday service and
children's religious education (10:30 am. 1133 NE
181st Ave., Gresham. 503-665-2628 office@
eastrose org. www.eastrose org.) (7/0 5 )
Eckankar— Religion of the Light and Sound of
God holds w orship services and maintains a library of
m aterials to help you leam about the Divine S pirit in
today's w orld. (10 am Sunday 7904 SE Milwaukie Ave
503-233-1595 www. eckankar org .7(7/05)
Faith United Methodist Church is a welcoming com
munity of Chnstians in Troutdale that values and encour
ages all people in finding a place of belonging in the family
of God. Sunday worship at 10:15 am; Adult Education at
9 am; children and youth at 10 30 am. Wednesday Prayers
6-6:30 pm (27400 SE Stark St 503-661-4520 )0 /0 4 )
First Unitarian Church of Portland is an open and
affirming liberal religious community offenng a wide range of
programs to nurture spmtual growth, community and social
justice. Sunday service 9 and 11 am. (1011 SW 12th Ave
503-228-6389 wwwñrstunitananpoctland org.) (7/04)
Gay and Lesbian Outreach (GALO) o f S t Philip
Nen C atholic Church celebrates an affirm ing M ass fo l
lowed by a social (7:30 pm Friday. Paulist Center.
2408 SE 16th Ave 503-231-4955)( 7 /0 4 )
Gay Men's Labyrinth Project meets quarterly fo r
a w alking m editation and wisdom circle on the labynnth
(wwwgaylabyhnth.com.) (7 /0 4 )
Integrity is a group o f sexual m inonty Episcopalians
and friends. Various locations throughout Oregon.
(Bruce 503-286-9111. brucepdxor@attbi com.
www mtegntyusa org.) (7 /0 4 )
Interfaith Spiritual Center houses spintqal direc
tors from various w orld religious traditions, who are
available fo r guidance, classes and retreats (Second
Floor. 3910 SE 11th Ave. 503-233 2026. ext 3.
wwwmterfaithspintualcenter com.) (7 /0 4 )
Keshet Portland is a potluck group fo r Jewish mem
bers o f the sexual mm onties com m unity and their part
ners, spouses and supporters. Its purpose is to help
build bridges w ith the larger Jewish community.
M onthly social, religious and cultural events. (David or
Laney 503-226-7079. ext. 1 4 X 7/0 4 )
Koinonia Catholic Community is a progressive,
small faith community that gathers weekly to celebrate
Euchanst at Bridgeport United Church o f C hrist A wel-
YOUTH
Metro: Youth
Flavors, a social support group fo r sexual irtn o rtty
youth o f color 21 and younger, meets on weekends fa-
food and socializing. Regular events and activities
fla vo rs is a project o f Love Makes a Family's M ultiQ ueer
program and is supported by Brother to Brother (Kristy
503-228-3892 rwltiqueei@MBtnly.oig 10/04)
The Gay, Lesbian and Straight Education
Network (GLSEN) fights to e rfi anti-gay bias in K -12
schools (Suite 180. 12700 SW North Dakota St.
»129. Tigard. OR 97223 503-525-1177.
g/taen@gJsenoregon org wwwQisenoreqon o rg ) (7 /0 4 )
MultiQueer a program o f Love M akes a Family, pro
vides advocacy to sexual m inority youth O ffers
resources snd support m the com m unity and the school
system s, w ith a focus on support fo r queer and ques
tiorw ig youth o f cofcx (Kristy 503-228-3892.
multiqueer@fmfamily.org) (7 /0 4 )
commg congregation. Cathokc in tradition and Ecumenical
m membershp (6 pm Sunday 621 NE 76th Ave
503-6990473 www komoruacommunity org.) (7/04)
who seek the grace of God and desire to work for
peace and justice Child care available (1030 am
Longview United Methodist Church is welcom
ing and reconciling. (10 am Sunday 2851 30th Ave.
360-425-4927 ) ( 7 /0 4 )
University Park United Methodist Church
Metanoia Peace Community United Methodist
Church is a "house church" that brings gay and straight
together Daily morning prayer and Sunday evening worship
(503-281-3697 www tearsoup com/metancxaXl/04)
Metropolitan Community Church of Portland
holds ecum enical Sunday morning w orship s e rv ic e at
9 and 11 am Sunday school for children is held dunng
the 11 am service. (2400 NE Broadway 503-281-8868
info&mccportland com. www mccportland.com.) (7 /0 4 )
Nichiren Buddhist Temple of Portland offers
several weekly gathenngs Everyone welcom e! (10 am
Sunday , 730 am Tuesday and Thursday. 7:30 pm
Wednesday meditation. 2025 SE Yamhill St.
503 232-8064 www nichiren-shu org/portland.) (7 /0 4 )
Peace Church of the Brethren is a welcom ing
congregation. (11 am Sunday 12727 SE Market St.
503-254 6380X 1/04)
Portland Center for Spiritual Growth is a center
fo r worship, growth and leadership that adheres to an all
inclusive spmtual philosophy similar to 12-step. U nity and
Religious Science Impromptu wedding cerem onies avail
able. (503-777-0727 wwwportlandcenter.org.) (7/04)
Portland Radical Faeries meet tw ice a month w ith
believes in giving to the community, canng fo r one
another and making a difference one person at a tim e.
Come celebrate G od's diversity w ith us! (W arn
Sunday. 4775 N Lombard St. The Rev Jeanme
Knepper 503-289- 7843) (7 /0 4 )
Waverfy Heights United Church of Christ s
open and affirm ing w ith w orship, children's school and
child care. (10 am Sunday 3300 SE Woodward St.
503-238-1337 www waveriyucc org 7 (7/04)
Wy'east Unitarian Universalist Congregation
is an open and liberal religious com m unity offenng inter-
generational services and religious education fo r youth
and adults W e welcom e gay, lesbian, bi and trans
members and nurture spmtual growth living by Unitarian
U niversalist pnnciples. (4 pm Sunday 3915 SE Steele
St 503-777-3704 www wyeastpnwduua org.) (7 /0 4 )
Zion United Church of Christ, an open and
affirm ing congregation, is open to gay, lesbian, bi. trans
and heterosexual people who wish to w orship in a
C hrist centered, warm, caring, m ultiage/race/cultural
faith com m unity (11 am Sunday 2025 NE 23rd Ave..
Gresham 503-665-8741.) (7/0 4 )
Central Oregon: Spirituality
potlucks and circles at the full moon and the new
moon. Open to all men seeking alternative spiritual
grow th and com m unity C offee hours start 9:30 am
Saturdays at 3 Fnends C offeehouse. 201 SE 12th Ave.
United Church of Christ Congregational is an
open and affirm ing congregation in The Dalles. (9 20 am
(503-235-0826 otter@pcez co m .X l 104)
www form /m stry.com /usorucofcucoccJ (7/0 4 )
adult Sunday school. 10.30 am Sunday worship
111 EFifth St. 541-296-2909 ucccongl@netcnctnet.
Seventh-Day Adventist Kinship s a support organi
zation for queer people, their families and friends (PO Box
7320. Laguna Niguel. CA 92607 7320 866 732-5677.
office@sdakmship.org www sdakinship org.Xl/04)
SisterSpirit jffe rs women's spintuality celebrations,
discussion groups, a drumming circle, w orkshops and
classes Schedule o f events available A ll women are
welcom e (Suite 102. 3430 SE Belmont St Mailing
address: PO Box 9246. Portland. OR 97207.
503-736 3297 sistersp@teleport.com.) (7 /0 4 )
Southminster Presbyterian Church is an active
member o f the Com m unity of W elcoming
Congregations Sunday school and nursery care.
C lasses, com m unity service activities and events fo r all
ages and interests. (9-9.30 am Sunday chapel service,
10 am Sunday community worship service. 12250 SW
Denney Road. Beaverton 503-644-2073.
staff@southmm com. w ww southmin com .) (7 /0 4 )
St. Andrew Catholic Church invites all to jom a
diverse faith community for prayer and fellowship (930 am
Sunday 806 NE Alberta St 503-281-4429X1/04)
St. James Lutheran Church, a Reconciled in
C hrist congregation, welcom es all people fo r traditional,
liturgical w orship where we experience G od's reconcil
ing love that sets all people free (9 and 11 am Sunday
Washington: Spirituality
Abundant Life Center is A New Thought
Com m unity fo r spiritual awakening and transform ing
lives through love. A safe place where children learn to
embody spmtual principles (10 am Sunday 10006 NE
Ninth A ve . Vancouver The Rev Kathleen Verigin
360 573-2626.) (7 /0 4 )
East Vancouver United Methodist Church is
reconciling and welcom ing (10 am Sunday
5701 MacArthur Blvd 360-693-4761X1/04)
First Congregational Church United Church of
C hnst. holds services in an open and affirm ing congre
gation (W arn Sunday worship. 11 15 am adult educa
tion 1220 NE 68th St.. Vancouver. 360-693 1476
vanucc@aol.com.) (7 /0 4 )
Metropolitan Community Church of the
Gentle Shepherd in Vancouver welcom es you.
(1030 am and 6 3 0 pm Sunday worship. 9 am Sunday
Bible study 2200 Broadway The Rev Harriet
Barshofsky 360695-1480.) (7 /0 4 )
1315 SW Park Ave 503-227-2439
www stjameslutheranportland org.) (7 /0 4 )
Michael Servetus Unitarian Universalist
Fellowship i Welcoming Congregation, provides a home
for the liberal religious spmt. (960 and I t 15 am Sunday
4505 El8thSt.. Vancouver 3606951891X1/04)
St. Stephen's Episcopal Church has been welcom
mg all people since 1863 (12.10pm Wednesday and
7:45 and 10 am Sunday Sunday school and child care at
10 am 1432 SW 13th Ave 503-223-6424X1/04)
Willamette Valley: Spirituality
Trinity Episcopal Cathedral a welcom ing and
affirm ing congregation, invites all to w orship services
and ongoing program s in spmtual developm ent, com
m unity outreach, music and arts education. (8 am
Sunday Rite I chapel service. 10 am Sunday Rite II
cathedral service 147 NW 19th Ave 503-222-9811
www tnnity-episcopal org.) (7 /0 4 )
Trinity United Methodist Church is fo r all people
First Congregational Church United Church of
Chnst is an open and affirming congregation offenng wor
ship and church school Child care provided and wheelchair
accessible (9:30 am Sunday learning hour. 1030 am wor
ship 700 Manon St NE. Salem 503-363-3660 H I 104)
Metropolitan Community Church Two Rivers
is a Chnstian church w ith pnmary outreach in the sexual
mmonties community. (6 3 0 pm Sunday 1166 Oak St.,
Eugene) (7/0 4 )
Sexual Minority Youth Resource Center
(SMYRO. a program of Cascade Behavioral
Washington: Youth
HeafthCara. offers support and recreation to gay. lesbian,
te and trans youth 23 and younger. Offers drop-in comput
er access, pod tables and an informal place to hang out
W eekly support meetings includes Trans Youth Group and
the creative group Personal Deity Proxy. (4 6 pm Monday
Triple Point offers education, support and advocacy
and Wednesday. 4 pm-midnight Friday and Saturday.
2100 SE Belmont St. 503672-9664 TTY 503-231-9286
www.smyrc org.) O ther programs include: Clackamas
County Sexual Minority Youth Connection
(COSMYC) provides opportunities h r queer and ques
tioning youth ages 23 and younger to get together fo r
free, fun and supportive 9oaal activities. O ffers one-on-
one support, refenrais and inform ation on HIV and STD
prevention and resources fo r adults who w otk with queer
and questioning youth (503-969-0060
cosmycyouth@yahoo com.) Pride Project bnngs togeth
er Washington County queer and questioning youth to
plan and attend monthly social events. Also inform atcn,
referral and advocacy services in W ashington County.
to gay, lesbian, bi, trans and questioning youth in
Vancouver, W ash. M eets 6-8 pm Tuesday« in the base
ment o f Youth House, 1112 Colum bia St. in Vancouver,
(John 360-695- 1325X1/04)
Willamette Valley: Youth
Gay, Leebian, Bi, Transgender and
Questioning Youth Group f a ages 13 to 18 offers
support, inform ation and fun in Eugene. Free, confiden
tial. adult-facilitated (Drop in 4 6 pm Friday Amazon
Community Center. 2700 hUyard St. 541684 3466 )
(7 /0 4 )
(Molly 503-260-5792 mo»ydprideprojectorg.) 0 /0 4)
Lesbian, Gay, Bisexual, Transgender Youth
Group fo r ages 25 and younger m eets every Monday
m Eugene. (5 pm. Komoriia Center 1414 Kincaid S i.
541 3461134) (7 /0 4 )
Eastern Oregon: Youth
O u t A b o u t Youth meet every Thursday m
Corv8Bis (7pm 1165 Monroe Ave 541 754-3906.)
(7 /0 4 )
Outside In operates a clrac fo r anyone who can't qualify
fa the Oregon Heeith Flan as well as needle exchange
services that include those who inject hormones Can pro
vide transitional housing for youth 20 and younger as wefl
as fa those HIV+ and younger than 23 Needs volunteers
o f a8 ages. (10am 6pm Monday Friday H 32 S W I3th
Sunday 3915 SE Steele St 503-777 3901X 1/04)
Eastern Oregon Center for Independent Living
offers support and advocacy to gay, lesbian, bi. trans and
questioning youth m Eastern Oregon (541-889 .3119 or
866248-8369 eocM hoclorg www eoc4.org ) (7/04)
Send your
Rainbow Youth is a safe, confidential support tjroup
fo r young gay men. lesbians, bisexuals, transgender
questioning and friends in Salem (6 6 pm Wednesday
690 State St. www.satemnMxwyouth org > <1/04)
outreach listings to:
just out attn Calendar) • PO. Box 14400 • Portland. OR 97293-0400
Fax submissions to 503-236-1257 or e-mail justout@justout.com
Submissions cannot be accepted over the phone • Please type your announcements and include full contact information
Love stinks
So sick of men, I’ve gone limp
hate men, can’t orgasm
Men suck. I know—
unless you’re alone and
I am one. I’ve had four
consider dating women
mid-length relationships:
even though you’re gay.
John, who 1 cheated on
Maybe you’ll find
relentlessly, having long
help with a good thera
term affairs while drag
pist. You may also need
ging him along (four
to make amends to your
years); Michael, who was
previous boyfriends, since
my match— we lied and
your guilt for how you
cheated on each other
behaved in the past still
equally— and, yes, there
affects you and may pre
was overlap with John
vent you from having a
(seven years); Carl, a
successful relationship.
closet case (one year); and Joey.
Do something to help yourself.
By the time 1 got to Joey, 1 had
You deserve better, even if you don’t
examined my past and seen the
believe it.
behavior patterns, so I stopped cheat
ing and lying. I vowed to “do it
D e a r M s . B e h a v io r :
right” this time. 1 would become the
A lesbian co-worker of mine,
boyfriend 1 always wanted.
Ann, told me she’s getting married
O f course, 1 should have also real
next month and asked that 1 be sure
ized that Joey’s frequent rehab trips
to "tell my sister, Jane. A nn’s lover,
might continue even though he was
Gretchen, has been a colleague and
clean when we met. I supported Joey
mentor to my sister for several years.
for 5 1/2 years. The last 2 1/2 we had
Gretchen organized a baby shower
no sex or intimacy.
for my sister when she was pregnant.
He actively used for 3 1/2 years of
We all work for the same company.
the relationship. 1 basically decided it
Given the late notice and informal
was my punishment for what 1 had
ity of the notice, I’m not expecting
done to others. We broke up a year
either myself or my sister to he invited.
and a halt ago when I finally decided
1 would like to let them know, how
that being alone would be better
ever, that Jane and 1 wish them well.
than having the life sucked out of me
1 verbally congratu
by an active addict. O f
lated A nn when she
course, he immediately
told me about her plans
H ere are
got clean, got a good job
hut was wondering if it
m y issues would he appropriate for
and is now dating a pro
fessional architect.
my sister and me to
today:
Here are my issues
send them flowers. If so,
tcxlay: Men SU C K . I
M e n S U C K when should we send
don’t want one. I hate
them? If not, is there
I
don't
them. 1 can’t even orgasm
some other action you
with a man any longer
want one. would recommend?
(though I have no prob
— Trying to Do the Right
I hate them.
lem with masturbation)
Thing
and have considered dat
ing women. I have no desire to he
D e a r T r y in g t o D o t h e R ig h t
alone for the rest of my life without a
T h in g :
partner, hut the thought of being with
Don’t he thrown by the dyke
a man— with all the lying, cheating,
angle, dear Well-Meaning Straight
selfish behavior-— holds no appeal
Person; just treat Ann and
either. 1 feel lost without a solution.
Gretchen’s wedding the same way
I am turning 40. 1 go to the gym,
you’d treat anyone else’s. Sending
I make gotxl money, 1 have a career
flowers to someone who’s getting
and investments. But I have lost
married will never he a faux pas. If
faith that there is someone out there
you send rhem the day before, you’re
for me. What do I do?
more likely to catch them at home.
— Terminally Unique
There is one little Sapphic secret,
though. For a lesbian betrothal, you
D e a r T e r m in a l l y U n iq u e :
must carefully choose flowers that
You poor jaded little dear.
look like lahia. G o to the florist with
Not all men lie and cheat and do
this goal in mind, and be sure to
drugs behind your hack, hut it’s all
choose something pretty. Bring a
you know, and you’re afraid to hope
compact mirror with you in case you
for anything better. You’re in a nega
need to surreptitiously step out into
tive relationship pattern where some the parking lot to see if the flowers
one has to be the betrayer and some
you’ve chosen pass rhc test. J R
one has to he the victim. You say
that men suck and that you don’t
© Meryl Cohn 2004
want one, hut then you complain
that there’s no one out there for you.
M e r y l C o h n is the author of Do
Frankly, you sound like a bit t>f a
What I Say: Ms. Behavior’s Guide to
mess behind your good-job, gym-hody
Gay and Lesbian Etiquette
exterior. Maybe you need to admit it
(Houghton Mifflin). Signed copies are
and ask for help instead of trying to
available direcdy from the author. Send
pretend you’re fine. It’s clear that your
questions or correspondence to
emotional life isn’t working since you
msbehavior@aol. com.
D e a r M s . B e h a v io r :
31