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About Just out. (Portland, OR) 1983-2013 | View Entire Issue (March 19, 2004)
mai cfi 19.2004 35 ADVICE SPIRITUALITY Metro: Spirituality Ainsworth United Church of Christ is a m ulti racial, m ulticultural, open and affirm ing church. Sunday w orship is at 10 am. church school fo r children runs con curre ntly (2941 NE A insw orth S t 50 3 284 8767 a u cc& te le p o rt c o m ) (7 /0 4 ) Anawim Community o f gay men m eets w eekly fo r C hnstian m editation and prayer (7 :3 0 pm Thursday 503 2 8 1-07 22 ) U 704) Metropolitan Community Church of Portland S t Andrew Catholic Church invites a l to jorn a holds ecum enical Sunday m orning w orship services at ckverse faith community for prayer and fellowship (9 30 am 9 and 11 am. Sunday school fo r children is held during Sunday 806 NE A berta St. 50 3-28144293(7/04) the 11 am service (2400 NE B roadw ay 503-281 88 68 m foO m ccportland.com w w w m c c p o rtia n d c o m 7 (7 /0 4 ) Nichiran Buddhist Temple of Portland o ffers several w eekly gatherings Everyone w elcom e1 (1 0 am Sunday. 7 3 0 am Tuesday and Thursday. 7 3 0 pm 5032272439 www st/ames/utheranportland org.) (7/04) Peace Church of the Brethren is a w elcom ing congregation ( I t am Sunday 12727 SE M arket St. 5 0 3 2 5 4 -6 3 8 0 3 (7 /0 4 ) Bridgeport United Church of Christ is a com m u n ity o f progressive, political people exploring and cele brating the C hnstian faith W e are sexual m m onty and straight, m ulticultural and m ultiracial, and our children A ve 503-258-0992 w w w bridgeportucc o rg .) 0 /0 4 ) City Church. P ortland's "o ld e st gay-affirm ing C hnstian chu rch." o ffe rs a spint-driven church fo r today's diverse generations (10 am S unday com m u nion and w orship service. 6 :3 0 pm Sunday w orship service. 38 30 S E 6 2 n d A v e 50 3-77 5-5 024 3(71 04) Congregation P'nai O r (Faces o f Light) is a vibrant, M eets several tim es a m onth at Portland S tate U niversity EastroM Fellowship Unitarian Univarsalist a w elcom ing congregation, o ffe rs Sunday service and children's religious education. (1 0 .3 0 am Sunday 1133 N E 181st A ve . Gresham . 503-665 2628 e a stro se & te le p o rl com . w w w e a stro se .o rg .) (7 /0 4 ) Faith United Methodist Church is a w elcom ing com m unity o f C hnstians in Troutdale that values and encourages all people in finding a place o f belonging in the fam ily o f G od Sunday w orship at 10:15 am; A dult Education at 9 am; children and youth at 10:30 am. W ednesday P rayers 6-6:30 pm (2 7400 SE S tark S t. 503-661 4 5 2 0 3 (7 /0 4 ) First Unitarian Church of Portland is an open and University Park United Methodist Chuoch believes Waveriy Haights United Church of Christ is ing a difference one person at a time. Come celebrate God's diversity w ith us! (lO am S unday 4775 N Lombard St. The Rev Jeanme Knepper 5 0 3 2 8 9 78433(7/04) open and affirm ing w ith w orship, children's school and child care. (1 0 am Sunday 3300 SE W oodw ard S t 503-238-1337 www w avedyucc.org.)( 7 /0 4 ) Wy’east Unitarian Univarsalist Congregation is an open and liberal religious com m unity offenng inter- generational services and religious education fo r youth and adults. W e w elcom e gay. lesbian, bi and trans Multnomah County Multnomah C ounty issues marriage licenses from 8 a.m. to 4.45 p.m. weekdays in the Mamage License Unit o f the Multnomah Building. 501 S.E. Hawthorne Bfvd . Portland. The applica tion fee is $60 cash or certified check. M arriages are bemg perform ed through A pril 2 at H olocene. 1001 S.E. M orrison St. V isit w w w .basicright8.org fo r tim es and dates (as w ell as up-to-the-m inute info on the legality o f your m arriage in O regon) A list o f Multnomah County judges is available at the mamage license unit or at www.com idtnom ah.or.us/dbcs/assess_tax/judges pdf. The fee for an in-chamber appointment is $25. affirm ing liberal religious com munity offering a wide range of programs to nurture spiritual growth, com munity and social 7:45 and 10 am Sunday Sunday school and child care at 10 am 1432 S W 13th A ve 50 3 2 2 3 -6 4 2 4 3 (7 /0 4 ) ollow these directions fo r acquiring a license and g e tting m arried in M ultnom ah and Benton counties. Both parties m ust sign any m arriage license, and you do not have to be an Oregon resident to obtain a license O fficiants may also be available at one o f the churches in the Just Out S pirituality section. Campus M inistries (PO Box 42187. Portland. O P 97242-0187 503-248-4500 w w w pnatorpdx o rg ) (7 /0 4 ) St. Stephan'« Episcopal Church has been weicom Want to get hitched? egalitarian. Jew ish Renewal congregation in Portland m em bers and nurture spintual grow th Irving by U nitarian U niversalist pnnciples. (4 pm Sunday 3915 SE S teele S t. 503-777-3704 w w w w yeast pnw d u u a .o rg ) (7 /0 4 ) Zion United Church of Christ an open and affirm ing congregation, is open to gay. lesbian, bi. trans and heterosexual people who w ish to w orship in a C hrist-centered, warm , canng. m ultiag e/ra ce/cultural faith com m unity ( I t am Sunday 2025 NE 2 3 rd A ve.. G resham 50 3-6 6 5 -8 7 4 1 3 (7 /0 4 ) Central Oregon: Spirituality United Church of Christ Congregational is an open and affirm ing congregation m The Dalles (9 2 0 am adult Sunday school. 1 0 3 0 am Sunday w orship H I E F ifth S t. 5 4 1 296-2909 ucccongl@ netcnct net Benton County w w w form im stry.co m /uso ruco lcu cocc) (7 /0 4 ) justice. Sunday service 9 and 11 am. (1011 SVV 12th Ave 503-228-6389 www hrstuntananportland.org.) (7 /04) Gay and Lesbian Outreach (G A LO ) o f S t Philip Nen C atholic C hurch celebrates an affirm in g M ass fo l low ed by a social. (7 .3 0 pm Fhday Pauhst C enter, 2408 SE 16th Ave. 5 0 3 2 3 1 -4 9 5 5 3 (7 /0 4 ) Gay M en's Labyrinth Protect m eets qu arte rly fo r a w alking m editation and w isdom circle on the labynnth (w w w gaylabynnth.com .) (7 /0 4 ) Integrity is a group o f sexual rm nonty Episcopalians and fnends. V arious locations throughout O regon. Benton C ounty w ill begin issuing m arriage licenses to sam e-sex couples M arch 24 at 120 N.W . Fourth S t, C orvallis. The application fee is $50 fo r a black and w hite ce rtificate o r $52 fo r a “ designer" certificate. Benton C ounty judges perform cerem onies on Tuesdays only Schedule an appointm ent at the county buikfing o r at 541-766-6831 (press *0 "). The fee is $25. Washington: Spirituality Abundant Ufa Canter is A New Thought Community fo r spmtual awakenng and transform ng lives through love. A safe place where ctddren learn to embody spntual prxi- aples (10 am Sunday 10006 NE Ninth Ave . Vancouver The Rev Kathleen Vengm 360-573-26263 ( 7/04) East Vancouver United Methodist Church is reconciling and w elcom ing (10 am Sunday. (Bruce 5 0 3 -2 8 6 -9 1 1 1. bnjcepdxor@ attbi.com . Portland Cantor for Spiritual Growth is a center fo r w orship, grow th and leadershp that adheres to an a t w w w m tegrityusa o rg .) (7 /0 4 ) inclusive spintual philosophy sim ilar to 12 step, U nity and First Congregational Church. United Church of Christ, Interfaith Spiritual Center houses spiritua l d ire c holds services n an open and affirmmg congregation (10am Sunday worshç. 1135 am adult education 1220 NE 68th to rs from various w orld religious tra d itio n s, w ho are Rehgwus S cience Im prom ptu wedckng cerem onies avail able (503-777-0727 w w w p o rtla n d ce n te ro rg .) (7 /0 4 ) available fo r guidance, classes and re tre a ts (S econd P o rtla n d R a dica l F aarias m eet tw ice a m onth w ith Floor, 3 9 1 0 SE 11th A ve 503 233-2026. ext. 3 potlucks and circle s at the fu ll m oon and the new 5701 M acA rthur B /vd 360 693 47 61.) ( 7 /0 4 ) m oon O pen to all men seeking alternative spiritual Metropolitan Community Church of the Gentle Shepherd m Vancouver welcom es you Keshet Portland is a po tlu ck group fo r Jew ish m em grow th and com m unity. C offee hours start 9 30 am (1 0 3 0 am and 6 3 0 pm Sunday worship. 9 am Sunday bers o f the sexual m m onties com m unity and th e ir p a rt Saturdays at 3 Friends C offeehouse. 201 SE 12th Ave B ible study 2200 Broadw ay The Rev H am el ners. spouses and supporters Its purpose is to help build bridges w ith the larger Jew ish com m unity (503-235-0826 otterO p cez com . 7 (7 /0 4 ) B arshofsky 36 0 69 5 1480. 7 (7 /0 4 ) Sovanth-Day Adventist Kinship is a support organi nucnatH jfjrv m u s u n n a n an unraorsaifST M onthly social, religious and cultural events (D avid o r zation fo r queer people, th e r fam ilies and fnends. (PO Box Fellowship a Welcoming Congregation provides a home Laney 50 3 226-7079. ext 1 4 3 (7 /0 4 ) 7320. Laguna Niguel. CA 92607 7320 866 732-5677. othceQsdakmstvp org www sdakmship org.) (7/0 4 ) for the liberal nekgous spint (9 30 and 1115 am Sunday small faith com m unity that gathers w eekly to celebrate Euchanst at B ridgeport U nited Church o f C hnst A w el com ing congregation, Cathokc m tradition and Ecumenical classes S chedule o f events available A ll wom en are w elcom e (S u ite 102. 3430 SE B elm ont S t M ailing 503-699-0473 www kom onacom m unity.org.) (7 /0 4 ) address PO B ox 9246. P ortland. O R 97207 50 3-736-3297 s is te rs p O te le p o rtc o m .) (7 /0 4 ) Longview United Methodiet Church is w eicom 4505 E 1 8 th S t.. Vancouver 360695-18913(7/04) SisterSpirit o ffe rs w om en's spintuakty celebrations, discussion groups, a drum m ing circle , w orkshops and r m em bership. (6 pm Sunday 621 NE 76th Ave. mg and reconciling (1 0 am Sunday 2 8 5 1 30 th A ve 36 0 425 4 9 2 7 .) (7 /0 4 ) ber of the Communrty of W efcomng Congregations Sunday -----»- ------- r _________ 1 ■ - t. -1 « « — - n iuuinow “ w e n vOftm»uniry u m iib u I v W u x jo ib i school and nursery care Gasses, community service activi Southmkister Presbyterian Church is an active mem Willamette Valley: Spirituality First Congregational Church United Church of C hnst is an open and affirm ng congregation offering w or ship and church school O d d care provided and wheelchar acce sstle (9 3 0 am Sunday team ng hour. 1030 am wor ship 700 M a n n St. NE. Salem 503363-36603(7/04) Church is a ‘ house church" that bnngs gay and straight ties and events fo r a l ages and interests (9 9 30 am Sunday Metropolitan Community Church Two Rivers together Darfy morning prayer and Sunday evening worsfxp chapel serwce. 10 am Sunday oommunty w orshp serwce is a C hnstian church w ith pnm ary outreach in the sexual (503281 3697 www tearsoup com /m eta m a.) (7 /04) Y O U T H Metro: Youth Flavors, a social support group for sexual m inority youth o f color 21 and younger, meets on weekends fo r food and socializing Regular events and activities Flavors is a project o f Love Makes a Fandy's MultiQueer program and is supported by Brother to Brother (Jsye 503 226-3892 jayeOImfantyorg.) 0/04) tto tw c rfc CGLSEN) lights to end anti-gay b w srn K -12 schools. (Suite 180. 12700 SW North Dakota St. 9129. Tyatd. OR 97223 503-525-1177. glaenOgiscnoregon.org. www gtsenoregon.org ) (7/04) MuMQueer a program o f Love Makes a Famiy, pro vides advocacy to se u a l minority youth. Offers resouroas and support n the community and the school systems, with a focus on support for queer and questioning youth of color. (Jaye 503-2203882 jeyeOtmhanly.org.) (7/04) Outside Is uperates a d m c for anyone who can't qualfy fo r the Oregon Health Plan as w e l as neede exchange services that Include those who mject hor mones Can provide transitional housing fo r youth 20 and younger as w e l ae fo r those Hh/+ and younger then 23 Needs volunteers o f s i ages. (10 am-6 pm Mcndey-Fnday. 1132 SW 13th Ave. 503-535-3900 wwwoutsideinorg) (7/04) 12250 SW Denney Road. Beaverton 503644 2073 m inonties com m unity (6 3 0 pm Sunday 1166 O ak S t . s ta fflso u th m n com www southern com .) (7/04) Eugene 7 (7 /0 4 ) CBMYftO. a program of Caacada Behavioral (541689-3119 or 866-2486069 eodt9eod.org wwweoci org. ) (7/04) nearix^are, oners suppon ana recreation to gsy leawan. br and trans youth 23 and yaunger. Offers dropnn comput er access, pod tables and an informal place to hang out Weekly support meetings Indudes Trane Youth G n xp and the creetx* group Personal Deity Proxy. (46 pm Monday ana weonesaay. 4 pmmtmtgni maty tna otturaty. 2100 SE Belmont St 503672-9664. TTY 500-231-9286 www smyrc org ) Other programs indude: Ctechamae CCOSMYQ provide« opportunities for queer and ques tioning youth ages 23 and younger to get togriher for free, fon and stfportMe so ad adM tee Offers one-on- one support» nswCfTwS and uformstion on ruv ana oft/ prevention and reaouiCM for adults who work wth queer and questioning youth (5009696060. (x>$mycyou(Tnryenoo.com.j r n o t rroytet onngs togew er W sehrgton C a tty queer and quesOorwig youth to plan and attend monthly social memiB. Also nformatton. referral and attocacy services in W nftngton County (Moty 503260-5792 mdydpndipqect org) (7/04) Washington: Youth TripfeM rt offers education, support and advocacy to gey lesbian, bi, trans and questioning youth « Vancouver, Wash Meets 6-6 pm Tuesday« in the base ment of Youth Houee, 1112 Columbia S t in Vancouver (John 360695-1325.) (7/04) Willamette Valley: Youth fo rth Graup forages 13 to 18 offers support, •womwoon ano tun *> cugene rreo, connaefn», aawr faaitated (Drop in 4 6 pm Fnday Amaaon Communty Can tor. 2700 Htyard St. 541664-346630/043 Leebiae. Coy, Biaaw i l. Tnmepeoder forth Croup for agaa 25 and younger meets every Monday in Eugene. (5 pm ftonon• Center. 1414 Kincaid St Eastern Oregon: Youth Lhring offers support and attaoacy to gay, lesbian, bi. trans and questioning youth in Eastern Oregon. D e a r M s . B e h a v io r : $41-346-113430/04) M s k s e fo r th Is a aria, r u flh ih r t support group for young gay man, lesbians, bsesusis, IranaQsnder. question ing and friends (66 pm Wafnadey Mkhe Butting 690 SMe St.. Salem ni»» sr t inrartx-w youeh.org7(7/04) D e a r M s . B e h a v io r : I’ll get right to the point. I am not homo phobic or gay, but I like nothing better than a big, juicy dildo up my ass now and then. I was once married, and my wife never knew, due to my own personal shame and feeling sinful over my private extremes of lust. Am I a bit too weird wanting a woman in my life who would love to hang me senseless up the wazoo? I’m also very religious, and this forces me to deal with my insecuri ties about my closet behavior. It seems to me that a woman would not find this tantalizing. Are most women possibly into this with a very male guy like me? I am very good- looking and, believe me, seem to have no problem with women find ing me attractive. But I’m afraid I’ll fall in love yet want to be honest with her about my “dildo affection,” and she will then bolt and tell me to see a psy chologist and repent. Help! Am I destined to he the only guy on the block who thinks this way? — Kbay St.. Vancouver 3606931476 vanuccOao! com ) 0 /0 4 ) w w w m teriaithspintualcenter. com . 7 (7 /0 4 ) Koinonta Catholic Community is a progressive, Straight dope on anal sex mg a l people snce 1863 (12 10 pm W ednesday and in giving to the community, canng for one another and mak are valued m em bers (1 0 3 0 am Sunday. 621 NE 76th The big bang S t Jamat Lutheran Church a R ecorded n Chnst con gregation. welcomes a l people for tradtxxial. Kurgeal wor- stop where we experience God's reconciling love that sets a l people free (9 and I I am Sunday I3 I5 S W Park Ave W ednesday m editation 2025 SE Yam hill St. 503-232-8064 w w w m ch iren-sh u.org/po rtland ) (7 /0 4 ) ..................... ü ...................... D ear K bay : This year 1 turned 50, and my partner for the past 12 years told me our relationship was over. I’ve had three wonder ful relationships in my life, and all three are now close friends. But romance no longer inter ests me. Do you have any advice on growing old alone? — D ear R : Ms. Behavior won’t suggest that you need to sit on a mountain and chant in order to enjoy your partner-free life. Perhaps ironically, most o f the things that would help you grow old alone more happily would also help you he happier in a relationship. S o you don’t need to com m it to a solitary life to try them out. Here are a few ideas to help you become a happy iibersingle: 1. Cultivate stronger relationships with your friends. 2. Have as much sex as you want, with yourself or others. 3. Keep lists of things you’d like to do or see (art exhibits, movies, travel, etc.) and make sure you go. 4. Dress like you’re going on a date sometimes even though you’re not. Don’t wear sweat pants unless you’re engaging in an athlet ic activity or you have a fever of more than 101 degrees. 5. Start or keep a commitment to stay physically fit. 6. Get involved with a group that interests you: a community organiza tion, a book club, a theater company, whatever. 7. Remain open-minded and try not to become bitter. 8. Be good to yourself: Moisturize. G et nice haircuts. Take vitamins. Eat well. Ms. Behavior knows lots o f peo ple who, after a breakup, have spent a year or two plotting their remain ing lonely years. Many o f those peo ple are now happily coupled. Finding a partner doesn’t need to he your ultimate goal, but don’t he so jaded that you don’t allow for the possibility o f love. JT1 Am I a bit too weird wanting a woman In m y life who would love to bang me senseless up the wazoo? Lots of straight men like to be pene trated, and, luckily, plenty of straight woman are willing to penetrate them. (Here’s a news flash: Some women like anal sex, too— both giving and receiving it— and wouldn’t find your desire the least bit odd.) Perhaps even your ex-wife wouldn’t have minded “banging you senseless,” but you never gave her the chance because you never told her what you wanted. If a big, juicy dildo is important to you, don’t make the mistake of starting another serious relationship with someone who doesn’t know it. In fact, you’d have little to lose by mentioning it on a second or third date because any woman who’d reject you for wanting a dildo up your ass is clearly not the right woman for you. As for being religious, it’s hard to understand your feelings of shame and conflict. Where does it say, ‘T hou shalt not have a woman shove a giant dildo up your ass” ? You very quickly deny you’re gay, hut it does seem you found Ms. Behavior’s column in a gay news paper. Perhaps in your next letter, you can tell Ms. Behavior what you really think about when your sweet new girlfriend penetrates you with her big latex dick. P © Meryl Cohn 2004 M eryl C ohn is the author of Do What I Say: Ms. Behavior’s Guide to Gay and Lesbian Etiquette (Houghton Mifflin). Signed copies are airulahle directly from the author Send questions or correspondence to msbchavurr@anl. com.
