ft m f I i f i t # c
#1I
90.7 PORTLAND
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NEWS, PUBLIC AFFAIRS AND
Bad manners
MUSIC THAT YOU WON'T HEAR
ANY W HE RE E L S E . LISTEN
FOR
TH IS WAY O UT
Don’t get too chummy with cheapskates and drunks
AT 6 PM EVERY TUESDAY.
EVERY BOOK OF GAY EROTICA
ALWAYS IN STOCK!
D ear M s . B ehavior :
( new ) On the Couch. Three muscular bucks get
naked and wrestle (I think it’s wrestling...) $40.
<@)JacJr the Stripper. Daddy-boy artist Julius
returns with filthy new picture-story book. $27.
( new ) Masculine Scent. Not a cologne but a
new picturebook of dreamy Asian men. $20.
DOWNTOWN @ 927 SW OAK • 226-8141
I
O
t
A N N I V E
tl
R S A R Y
C O N C E R T !
f re i r h r t n t;
A urora chorus
J O A N S Z Y M K O , DIRECTOR
S A T U R D A Y
SC H N ITZE R C O N C E R T HALL
MAY 4 • 8:°° P|vi
RESERVED: $15. $18. $25
PC PA BOX O f FICE <g
f a s t i XX: 503.224.8499
AURORA CHORUS: 503.AURO RA.1
NO ONE TURNED »WAT DUE TO IACR 0E f UNOS—SPACE AVAILABLE
i
n i g h t
o
n
l
y
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C e l e b r a t i n g a d e c a d e cfi w o m e n d i n g i n g p e a c e .
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pii
a n s r i l n
Q U i s
c s
c i o t P
L i e
e \
W aaosi
B B fV
12VSÌ ÌTS
may
m u campus
&LL events aæe wee
sunoaY
w eortesoaY
7- 8:30p
Candle Light Vigil, M U Steps
8:3O ft30p
Reception, W om ens Center
12-1 p
2 - 3p
3 - 4p
inoraaY
B row n Bag Lu n ch and M u sic , Quad
H om osexuality and the Bible, M U Lounge
L G B T Issues in The Oregon B allot Initiative
P ro ce ss, Stacey M cG ow an, A S 0 S U
LGBTQ Q I Task Force Director, Quad
12-1p
B ro w n Bag L u n ch and M u sic , Quad
4-5p
Queer Student Panel, M U Lounge
5 - 5:30p
Physics of Lesbian Sex; Colleen Belisle,
9p -ove rnight
International Forum
7HUWS08Y
6-7:30p
8- 9:30p
Physics of Gay S e c Al Solocheir, International Forum
TUOSOBY
Speech Choir, M U Lounge
Cam pfire and Cam p Out!, Quad
12-lp
B row n Bag Lu n ch and M u sic. Quad
1 -2p
Put your action where your Acronym is! Including
the T in LGBT, Jace Drew Ousley, Quad
1 2 -lp
B ro w n Bag L u n ch and M u sic , Quad
1-6p
Recreational Sporting Activities. A l Welcome!, Quad
2:30-4:30p
1-2p
Trans Fundamentals, Jace Drew Ousley, M U 208
3- 4p
Rainbow JeOo Wrestling, Come Wrestle!, Quad
4- 5p
Interpersonal Violence in LGBTQ Relationships,
6 30-7:30p
In the Borderlands: A Discussion about Race and
Breaking Through Stereotypes and Building Bridges,
Jen Chen. M U 208
6- 8p
8-10p
Celebration: Past, Present and Future, M U Ballroom
Magdalen H su -li in Concert, M U Ballroom
Robm Keillor, UCPS, W om ens Center
Sexual Orientation, Black Cultural Center
8-9:30p
Campus Safety W ak, W om ens Center
PWOBY
12-1:30p
March, Start at Quad
8-11p
Drag Show and Dance. Free. M U Balroom
Queer Pride week is brought to you by the 2002 Pride Planning Committee
Individual program s are sponsored by the Rainbow Continuum, OSU W om ens Center, IS O S U ,T h e Queer
Resource Center, ASOSUS LGBTQQI and W om ens Task Forces, the Asian/Pacrfic American Student Union, Hewlett-Packard
C o m p an y an d S tu d e n t In v o lv e m e n t s D iv e rs ity and D ev elo p m e n t and W o m en s C en ter
row n*Tnwn
n r a- rue R w ntow canTirmutn tt 7 -« « c * th > Q utm *M ou»e« Ctrrrm 7S7-«wi
w w w ,o(\$Tt<lw /cA U A rdA I\
___________
________
___________/
ing or even 28 days
of rehabilitative
treatment for the
pathologically
parsimonious.
I would like to
know what you think
about people who are
just plain cheap.
1 have a friend,
D ear M s . B ehavior :
Julie, who I have
My ex-lover Barry
known since college.
showed up a drunken
We are now Kith in
mess on my dixirstep
our 40s.
last weekend. He was
Over the years, I
reeking of booze and
have been invited to
raving like a lunatic.
many parties (from
His wife (that’s right,
birthdays to brunches)
wife) and he had had a
with Julie where she is
big public drunken
the only person who
brawl and she kicked
doesn’t contribute. I
him out.
kept my mouth shut
I put down my
aKiut this until last
Kxrk, threw an extra
year, when she told
log on the fire, made a
me she was embar
pot of coffee and let
rassed that she did not
him stay the night on
bring a present to our
the sofa. I felt sorry for
friend’s 40th. (Every
Barry, although I’ll admit I was thankful all the
one else did, and she realized this during the
while for being spared this drunken drama on a
opening of the presents.)
daily basis.
1 gently explained to her that it’s always
The thing is, after he left the next morning
good manners to bring something when you
are invited to a social engagement—even if
(of course he went back to his wife; he always
does), I felt upset and anxious and kind of
it’s just a Kiwi of potato salad! After our
talk, Julie started contributing something,
depressed. Should I call him and tell him his
actions do have consequences? I think he
whether it was a bottle of wine or box of
should know.
candy. 1 was so relieved aKiut this.
— Ambushed
But for some reason, Julie recently regressed
and didn’t bring anything to the last two par
ties she and I attended. I couldn’t believe it. I
D ear A mbushed :
Barry won’t stop showing up at your house
want to shake her.
like a drunken mess just because it makes you
Julie is putting herself through graduate
feel anxious and depressed. Drunks are a bit
school, which we all know is quite expen
more self-centered than that.
sive, hut she makes six figures a year, so
Remind Barry that one
1 really think she should he
of the benefits of your
more considerate. Do you
have any advice for me?
breakup is that you don’t
M
y
ex-lover
have to play Florence
—Jen
B arry showed up
Nightingale anymore.
D ear J en :
(His wife doesn’t either,
a drunken mess
Ms. Behavior enthusiasti
hut
she’ll have to figure
on
m
y
doorstep
cally joins you in your dis
that out for herself.) The
last weekend
dain for the cheap. Next to
hard part for you will he
He was reeking
sticking to it, but if sym
kleptomania and had
hygiene, it’s the worst char
pathetic friends turn him
of booze and
acteristic in a friend.
away when he’s “reeking
raving like a
What do these shameless
of booze and raving like a
lunatic. His wife
misers hope to do with the
lunatic,” Barry might
(th at’s right, wife) someday seek help for his
few dollars they neglected to
spend on wine or potato
problem.
and he had had
salad, anyway? They’re not
a big public
saving their money for
D ear M s . B ehavior :
drunken brawl
charm school. And please,
After reading your
and she kicked
allow Ms. Behavior to pre
wonderful hook, I still
empt any P.C. or Marxist let
him out.
can’t figure out which of
ters by emphasizing we’re
your categories I fit into.
talking about people who are
I hate expensive
stingy, not broke.
brunches. I hate Barbra Streisand and
Don’t waste your breath on your penny-
Disney. Clubs annoy me. I love to hake, I
pinching friend. You’ve already explained the
think Scully from The X-Files is the perfect
joys of gift giving, and Julie won’t hear your
woman, I’m an interactive designer, and I do
message of abundance.
step aerobics. Is that enough to go on?
If you ever develop the impulse to date
—Steve
Julie, don’t. If you are just friends and she
chooses to attend her friends’ parties empty-
D ear S teve :
handed, her cheapness does not reflect on
Ms. Behavior might have to see you to he
you.
sure, hut it sounds like you probably fit into one
Of course, if she were your girlfriend, it
of her new categories: Suburban HouscFag. JH
would reflect on you, and you’d he forced to
investigate more extreme measures, whether
Write your confused and conflicted heart out to
they involved positive reinforcement, sham-
Ms. B E H A V IO R at MsBehavujr@aol.com.