M y 7.2000 » j u s t M t , 3 3
Good Samaritan Hosprtal. (1040 NW 22nd A ve, Sixth
Floor, meeting room B .) (11 /00)
Live and Let Live C lub holds 12 step meetings and
social activities for the lesbian and gay recovery commu
nity. Call for current meeting times and activities.
(2940-A SE Belmont S t 503-238-6091.) (11 /00)
The Lunch Bunch hosts AA meetings for gays and
lesbians, but is open to everyone. Meetings daily at
noon except Sundays at 1 pm. (M etropolitan
Community Church of Portland, 2400 NE Broadway,
enter on the north side o f the building.) (11 /00)
Rainbow A l-Anon meets Thursdays at 6 pm at the
MCC Church, NW 24th Ave and Broadway.
(503-222-5756). (11/00)
walks, archaeology, rock collecting, camping, kayaking,
star gazing, an occasional "lecture" and a monthly plan
ning potluck No experience necessary (6 45-8 30 pm
second Thursday planning meeting 503-289-3605 or
503 6398936 or 503-466-0058 or e-mail to
lespnwQaol com 7(11 /00)
Metro: Physical Recreation
Lesbian social group fo r women 50 and over
The Adventure Group. Portland's gay and lesbian
meets on the third Saturday of the month. (4-7 pm.
503-281-4424. 503-331 -0415.) (11 /00)
Long Yang Club— Portland C hapter a social
group for Asian gays and lesbians and their fnends.
meets at 8 pm on the first Wednesday and third Sunday
of each month at 3 Fnends Coffeehouse.
(503-963-1841.)(\ 1/00)
Lulu's Pervy Playhouse is a social group for
Willamette Valley: Health
Womenspace provides a 24-hour hot line and shelter
for women and children who have been abused physical
ly, sexually, or em otionally Also hosts a lesbian and
bisexual women's support group. (Chsis: 541-485-6513.
business: 541-485-8232. lesbian alliance:
541-302-2417 ) ( 1 1/00)
SOCIAL
self-identifying women who are into SM Play parties are
held on the second Saturday of the month. (lululistQhot-
mailcom. ww.v.ps. net/wynter/luluspage. html,
503-231-3992.) (05/00)
M ount Hood Womyn networking professionally and
socially. (503- 701 -8302. 7(11 /00)
N orthw est Gender A lliance is a social and support
organization for cross-dressers and transsexuals.
Monthly open meetings and socials. (PO Box 4928.
Portland. OR 97208 503-646-2802.
www teleport. com/~nwga. 7(11 /00)
Oregon Bears is a social group for bears and their
admirers. Newsletter, activities and monthly social gath
erings. (503-240-2813, www.oregonbears.org.) (11 /00)
Metro: A rts & M usic
F irst Wednesday S ocial is a potluck fo r HIV-*-
people and their fnends (Contact Phillip at 503-493-
3761.) (11/00)
( 11 / 00 )
Portland Gay M en's C horus is open to singers,
support members and volunteers. (503-460-3689
www pdxgmc.org.) (11/00)
The Real C onnection is a social gathenng for
gay men who are artists, wnters, musicians or who
pursue some creative activity. M onthly potlucks on
the second Fnday (Todd 503-236-5763.) (11 /00 )
ORGAN (Oregon Regional Gay and Naked) is a
vanant people including FTMs, transguys, genderqueers
and significant others. We are based in Portland and
welcome folks from Oregon and W ashington. For more
info about our monthly meetings and e-mail network, call
(503) 471-1515 (11/00)
social club for nude men who enjoy being gay Monthly
potlucks and events. Guests are invited to attend two
events before deciding on membership. (ORGAN. PO
Box 14174. Portland. OR 97293-0174.) (11/00)
D ipstick Lesbians and D ykes w ith H ot Rods
cal events for bisexual and bi-fnendly people. Organizes
Portland Bi Day rally and publishes calendar of bi
events Mixed gender discussion groups are held 7 pm
on the first and third Fridays of the month at Laughing
Horse Books, 3652 SE Division St. Open to all.
(503-775-9717. pba@biportland.org.
www.txportland.org.) (11/00)
( 11 / 00 )
Im perial Sovereign Rose C ourt o f Oregon is a
nonprofit social organization dedicated to raising money
for chanties within the gay. lesbian, bisexual and trans
community. ISRC Event Hotline lists upcoming events
(503-306-0700. !SRC@aolcom,
www geocities com /W estH ollyw ood/H eights/7887)
( 11 / 00 )
Jewish Gay M en's G roup— call for meeting time
and place (503-246-5939. efraim leviQaol.com .) ( 11/00)
An informal Leather N ight and Red Hanky Social
are held the first and third Fnday of each month. (9 pm-
12 am at the D irty Duck Tavern. 439 NW Third Ave
503-224 8446. PDXSaltyDgQaol com ) (11/00)
Lesbians Enjoying the Sciences is a fun-loving
group of women who enjoy explonng all aspects of the
environment Activities include bird watching, nature
K-9 Club is a group of kindred folks and their dogs
who meet to hike and talk in Portland parks on the sec
ond Sunday of each month. (503-285-2986) (11 /00)
Lesbian Equestrian Group Do you have a horse?
Looking to get together with womyn and horses for
equestnan activities in the Pacific Northwest. Call
Denise at (503) 654-3865 or Lynn at
(503) 777-2339, ore-m ail
kelrav@rdrop.com. (11/00)
( 11 / 00 )
Cocksure is a social group for female-bom. gender
providing an accepting, social environment for chubby
men. and the men who like them that way.
(503-241 4535 o r www chubnet.net/qentleqiants)
FOREST Group outings are cooperative adventures
for women. Participants are responsible for providing
their own equipment and choosing outings appropnate
for their skill and fitness level. All skill levels welcome.
(503-286-5382. www.odin.cc.pdx.edu/-gijm) (11/001
Rosetown Ramblers. Portland's
gay and lesbian square dance club,
dances at mainstream, plus and
advanced levels (PO Box 5352,
Portland. OR 97228-5352.
503-234-9944,
www rdrop. com /users/ram blers.)
( 11 / 00 )
Gentle Giants o f O regon is a group dedicated to
Mondays at 6 pm for bicycle ndes. All nding levels wel
come. (503-254-6971.) (11/00)
( 11 / 00 )
B rother to B rother is a fam ily of African-
Amencan gay and bisexual men dedicated to the
empowerment of, and improvement in the quality of
life within our community Board meetings every
third Monday of the month at 5:30 pm. (Brian. PO
Box 3182. Portland. OR 97208 503-417-7991.)
group for lesbians 35 and over, singles or couples. They
meet for a potluck on the third Saturday of each month
and take camping trips during the summer. Monthly
newsletter is $9 per year (503-232-9714.)
CLIPS-Cycling Lesbians in Portland meets
pm at Hollywood Lanes. 40th Ave.
and Halsey St. (PO Box 80002.
Portland. OR 97280-1002. 503-293-
0438 BOWLpdx@aol.com. mem
bers aol. com/BOW Lpdx/pcba html.)
Bisexual Com m unity Forum is an age and
gender-inclusive social, support and education net
work founded in 1980. Activities include dances,
potlucks, field trips and a polyamory interest group
Meetings are held on the first and third Mondays.
(7:30 pm at M q o 's Coffee Den. 2853 SE Stark St.
Lauiy 503-285-4848.) (W O O )
Funny Ladies Tea and Poey S ociety, is a social
motorcycle club for gay men and friends in Western
Canada and the Pacific Northwest, hosts day runs and
camping events. (bcbiker@yahoo com, www bordemd-
ers.org.) ( 11/00)
Portland Gay and Lesbian
Community Bowling
Association bowls Sundays at 4
Metro: General
FRIENDS is a weekly support and discussion group
for African American gay and bisexual men that meets
Wednesdays 5-7 pm (Bnan. 503-287-8651.) (W OO )
Border Riders M otorcycle Club . the largest
Out Dancing teaches partner
dancing for same-sex couples at
Sally Mack's School of Dance.
Classes for different dance styles
start the first Fnday of each month.
(503-236-5129.) ( 11/00)
Rose C ity Gay Freedom Band is a concert
band open to lesbian, gay, transgendered, bi and
supportive musicians and friends. (PO Box 1082.
Portland. OR 97207. 503-790-2170. http://com m u
mty oregonlive. com /cc/rcgfb.) (11 /00 )
( 11 / 00 )
outdoors group, organizes a vanety of activities and
social events including hiking, skiing, mountain biking,
camping and rafting. (503-452-5680, www adventure-
group org.) (11/00)
Lesbian Garden Club is a group
of women who love gardens and gar
dening. They exchange plants,
seeds, advice and encouragement
while having a good time Please call
or e-mail for a current copy of the
newsletter and information about
upcoming events. (Kathe,
503-909-2002. e-mail
LCCOregon@aol.com) (11 /00)
The P ortland Lesbian C ho ir welcomes support
ive members and volunteers. (503-241-8994)
invite women with cool cars to go cruisin' with them.
(Rachel 503-735-1184. Devioune 503-289-3104.)
First Baptist Church. 125 SE Cowls St., McMinnville
Don 503-434-6266.) (11/00)
Portland Bisexual A lliance hosts social and politi
P ortland Leather A lliance is a pansexual. not-for-
profit organization dedicated to fostenng a positive com
munity for safe, sane, and consensual alternative adult
sexualities in general and S /M /leather/fetish in particu
lar (503-727-3148 wwwpdxleatheralhanceorg.)
( 11 / 00 )
Portland M etro Prime Tim er* is a social group for
men. (PO Box 5884 . Portland. OR 97228. 50-244-7550
o r 360-254-1718 pdxpnmetimers@ yahoocom.)( 11 /00)
PSU Queers and A llies invites everyone to partici
pate in activities and meetings Educational and social
programming, support and referral services for persons
of all onentations and colors (441A Smith Memonal
Center. Portland State University campus E-mail queer-
sandalliesQmail pdx.edu
www ess pdx edu/sfcsg/queersandalhes
503 725 5681 .7(11/00)
Rose C ity Discussion Club, the largest open pan-
sexual club in the Northwest, is open to all orientations,
fetishes and lifestyles that are safe, sane and consensu
al Monthly meetings, workshops, and newsletter
(503-972-1869 rcdcQteleport com.
www teleport co m /- rcdc ) (11 /00)
Together Works, a confidential group for lesbians,
gays, bisexuals, and fnends. meets for socials and dis
cussions of topics of mutual interest Meets second and
fourth Mondays (7 30 pm May Sept.. 7 pm O ct -April
Ski Out is a LGBT ski club with
outings twice monthly to Mt. Hood
and other destinations. Join us for
downhill and cross-country skiing, snow boarding or
lodge lounging (503-973-3441. www.skiout.org.)
(05/00)
Team Portland Tennis Association plays every
Sunday 8 am-noon at the University of Portland. Women
and men players of all skill levels are welcome. (Alex
Godinez 503282-7210) (11/00)
Team Quest, the athletic and exercise program of
Project Quest, offers individual and group, indoor and
outdoor physical recreation opportunities for people liv
ing with HIV and AIDS (503-493 0288.) (11/00)
Southern Oregon: Social
A bdill-E llis Lambda Community Center hosts
social events and groups. Call for schedule. (Mailing
address: PO Box 927 Ashland. OR 97520. Location:
281 Fourth St.. Ashland. OR 97520 541-488-6990.
lambdacntr@aol com. www aelcca org ) ( 11 /00)
Washington: Social
MenTalk of Vancouver holds a social on the first
Monday and a discussion group on the third Monday of
each month at 7 pm. (Peter 360-576-6595.
Men TalkofVancWAQwebtv net.) (11/00)
SW Washington Gay and Lesbian Socialites is
a Vancouver-based organization whose members get
together regularly for social events and activities. The
Socialites was organized to build a sense of community
among gay men and lesbians in the Portland/Vancouver
area Newsletter available by e-mail or USPS.
(360 735 1901. Socialites@aol com.) (11 /00)
Tha Thorny Rosas is a social group for lesbians, pn
manly over 45. who live in the Vancouver/Clark County
Wash area Please contact Judy. (360) 906 1763. e-
mail: Judy342@cs com (11/00)
But don’t make
your life unneces
sarily dramatic; try
not to leap into the
warm and juicy lap
of lesbianism until
you’ve come to
accept that it’s what
you want and need
to do. A bit of pru
dence may prevent
you from having
delusions of control and suffering
the fate of many formerly hetero
sexual women who have been
unceremoniously stripped of the
belief that they could just dabble
in brief and uncomplicated lesbian
affairs while keeping the rest of
their lives intact. (Ms Behavior
believes that there’s a potato chip
commercial that addresses this
particular issue.)
D ear M s .
B ehavior :
I’ve been married
to a wonderful man
for 12 years, but I’m
coming to accept
that I’m probably a
lesbian. I am 35 and
very close to my
family, who are lov
ing but conservative
and quite homopho
bic (in an ignorant, not a mean,
way). I have been so happily mar
ried that I think if I told my fami
ly 1 was a lesbian they might have
me committed (to say nothing of
the heartbreak this would create
for my wonderful husband).
I see now that I have ignored
huge signs since age 6, and in the
past eight years I have fallen in
love with two women— who, luck
ily, were heterosexual. But this is
starting to get painful and fright
ening as I enter my “baby-making”
years. My life is very good in many
ways, but I fear that it may not be
“complete,” whatever that means.
I’m not really physically
attracted to men. I’ve had one
lover in my entire life (my hus
band, whom I started dating when
we were 18— he was a virgin too).
My life has been so linked to this
one person and this one path
since I was a teen-ager. I have one
incredible lesbian friend for sup
port, but this is a lot for her to
handle.
Anyway, 1 enjoyed your book
so much and you seem to possess a
lot of wisdom along with a wicked
sense of humor. I know you don’t
have a crystal ball and god knows
how many letters you receive, but
I thought I’d give this a shot.
What the hell should I do?
— D.
D ear M s . B ehavior :
I work for a company com
prised of 50 people. I am the
token gay male and we have a
token lesbian, whom I’ll call Sally.
I am out to several straight people,
but Sally keeps to herself. I know
she’s gay because she goes to the
Dinah Shore golf tournament in
Palm Springs and has a summer
home in Provincetown.
I have tried to come out to her
several times and wanted to make
our relationship gay-friendly, but I
have failed miserably. She used to
be pleasant, but lately she has
been terse and abrupt, which puz
zles me. We are working on the
same project, and last week she
sent me a rude e-mail with insen
sitive remarks about my work.
This is not the first time I have
locked horns with a lesbian. Why
do lesbians hate me? I don't see a
way to improve this situation.
Please help.
—R
D ear D. j
You’re brave to take this on,
and probably have no choice. It’s
bittersweet that coming out— if
that’s where you’re headed— will
be difficult because you’re so
happy in your marriage. Give
yourself time to sort out your feel
ings. It may help to imagine your
self 10 years from now: Are you
happy envisioning yourself with
your wonderful husband? Or do
you prefer to fantasize about life
with a delightful bride?
If you make a decision that’s
based in truth, your family, your
friends and even your husband
may ultimately support you. But
until then, you’ll need more sup
port than you can get from your
one dyke friend and Ms. Behavior.
That might mean one-on-one
therapy, where you can safely dis
cuss your confusion. Or, if you call
queer support organizations, you
can probably find a group of mar-
ried-but-confused dykes-in-wait
ing, where you can sit in a circle
and talk about your longing. [See
listing for Late Awakenings in this
paper’s Out &. About section.)
D ear R:
Ms. Behavior doesn’t mean to
shock you, but not all lesbians are
friendly. Furthermore, Ms.
Behavior would have to meet you
in person to determine why les
bians hate you, or even if it’s true.
Sally may dislike your personal
ity, but it’s also possible that she’s
baring her teeth at you because
she’s self-loathing and closeted.
The fact that you’re both queer—
if she plays golf she must be— may
not be enough reason to be
friends. If you worked in San
Francisco or Manhattan, you’d
have plenty of queer coworkers
and wouldn’t try so hard to court a
grouchy and critical dyke. And if
Sally is a closet case, attempts to
insert subtle references to gay cul
ture in conversation or to induce
her to join you in show tunes will
probably only annoy her.
Write your confused and conflict -
ed heart out to Ms. BEHAVIOR at
Ms Behavtor@aol. com .
■