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About Just out. (Portland, OR) 1983-2013 | View Entire Issue (Feb. 4, 2000)
lebruary 4.2MX) - J ms S aat, 27 «I Unleash the power of your creative mind UNCOUPLED Continued from Page 25 Things to do now: 1. Make a list of the people you value. Use Valentines Day as an opportunity to tell them so. 2. Make plans for Valentines Day. Invite one or more friends to do something fun. 3. Focus on what you have— your friends, home, pets, job, achievements, the interests and hobbies you enjoy— rather than what you don’t have. 4 . Remember that Valentine’s Day is only one day out of the year. It’s only as important as you make it. jollect a stack of at least 10 magazines that (you can cut up. Allow your creativity, : imagination and inner wisdom to create a collage from the images you find. Place in the collage images that represent your authentic self— the real you, your hopes, desires and intentions for living a life filled with bliss. Once you have glued these images to a medium of paper, wood, glass or anything you like, ask the universe to join you in manifesting this or something better. Hang your self-collage in a place of honor and notice it often, feeling its essence in your soul. ■ M arilyn J. S orensen , P h .D., is a clinical psychologist in Portland with 23 years experience specializing in selfesteem and relationship issues. She is the author o f Breaking the C hain of Low Self-Esteem. She can be reached at (503) 293-6608. E xercises e o r Y o u r I I imd by P artn er inventory R e s o u r c e s : ake a list of the qualities you want in a | partner. Then consider whether you Î yourself do or do not possess those char acteristics. T he qualities you don’t possess in yourself are areas you may wish to work on. Many of us hold higher expectations for others than we do for ourselves, and this will often sabotage potential relationships. T h ere are literally many hundreds of books on developing self-esteem ; below are a few that speak directly to the queer commu nity. A mazon S pirit : D aily M editation for L esbians in R ecovery By Eleanor Nealy. Berkley Publishing Group, 1995. ■ D ean S idwell , M .S.W., has been a counselor in private practice since 1992. He believes m heal ing through understanding and removing uncon scious baniers, and specializes in the areas o f rela tionships, addictions and childhood traumas. For more information, call (503) 788-9440 or e-mail him at Sidean@pacifier.com. The qualities that you don't possess in yourself are areas you m ay wish to work on. Many o f us hold higher expectations for others than we do for ourselves, and this will often sabotage potential relationships. B reaking the C hain of L ow S elf -E steem By Marilyn J. Sorensen. W olf Publishing, 1998. E mpowering the T ribe : A P ositive G uide to G ay and L esbian S elf -E steem By Richard Pimental-Habib. Kensington Publishing, 1999. ' T he G ay & L esbian S elf - E steem B ook : A G uide to L oving O urselves By Kimeron N. Hardin. New Harbinger Publications, 1999. Chain ■ Self-Esteem D ean S idw ell L avender R eflections : Q uotations & A ffirmations for G ay M en & L esbians By Eleanor R. Wagner. Alamo Square Press, 1995. Beliefs I ur beliefs determine our reality. If your real- ; ity is not working for you, then change ' your beliefs. Try this exercise: Answer yes or no to the following questions about yourself. The Gay and Lesbian Self-Esteem Book Do you feel competitive in relationships? Are you afraid o f emotional intimacy? Do you distrust yourself or others? Is it easier to tell lies than to tell the truth? Is it hard for you to communicate your needs? Do you hide your authentic self on dates? Do you feel undeserving o f a relationship? Look at the boldface words in the questions to which you answered yes. Ask yourself the following questions about the boldface con cepts: W hat do I believe about this? Where did this belief come from? If this belief is outdated, then change it. Write out your new true beliefs. Read them and feel them for 30 days. K o s e C i t y M o rtg a g e S p e c ia lis ts « S p e c ia liz in g in D o m e fin a n c in g f o r (ja y M cn & Lesbians. 15 -$■ -$■ T ® l§ l %ealCy CooC Stuff- Antiques Treasures C .all R e n e e o r R o b fo r a P rivate, N o C o s t C o n s u lta tio n 0 O r visit o u r w e b s ite : w w w .ro se city m tg .co m 7 6 8 - 4 - 14-8 { 5 0 5 ) * nec°ffeehouse homepage com Featuring ALL ORGANIC COFFEE, F resh P astries, S o u p a n d S u n d ries C ommunity R esource R oom Zero Down Loans All Credit A Loan Types Creative Financing •) R est Your S p irit i 7372 SW Capitol Highway LIVE MUSIC | y n a sat 7-9pm Charming Garden m-9pm Portland. OK 37219 • 5 0 3 -2 4 6 -6 2 6 7 We a re located In Multnomah Village near The Bridge. Call for dlrectlone. 7631 HE Glisan • Portland. OR 97213
