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About Just out. (Portland, OR) 1983-2013 | View Entire Issue (Feb. 17, 1995)
just out ▼ feb ru ary 17. 1995 ▼ 3 INDEPENDENTLY SPEAKING Another coming out / can no longer call myself a conservative, nor a Christiany nor a Republican ▼ by Marvin Liebman the closet, terrified of coming out and standing bout 14 months ago, I began writing a openly with their sisters and brothers against the monthly column for lesbian and gay forces that would see us obliterated. Make no publications around the country. I mistake: The ultimate goal of our enemy is to make called the column “Conservatively us disappear, back to a closet that will make today ’ s Speaking.” Why this title? I believed seem wide open by comparison, or dead. Hysteri that my major credential in the gay community was my autobiography Coming Out Conservative, and cal? I don’t think so. the fact that I was a mover and shaker in the U.S. Where does that leave me? Us? I can no longer accept such labels as conservative, Christian or anti-communist and conservative communities for many years before 1 came out at the age of 67. Republican, which draw much of their coherence There were many gay men who could write a from hostility towards people like me. No gay man column, but there were not many gay conservative or lesbian in the United States should any longer men around, over 70, who wanted to share their accept any of these labels, which have become thoughts in the gay and lesbian press. I certainly mere code words for attacks on our collective had that spot covered—with no competition. dignity. We can accept no labels any longer. We Most of the publications printed my columns, must give our allegiance and support only to those either regularly or sporadically. However, most of individuals and groups who publicly stand with us the publications never used “Conservatively Speak against bigotry and fear of lesbians and gay men. ing” as the column header, but simply published Forget the hand wringing over Congress and what I had to say under my own name. I realized the federal government. We must focus on our own that the word “conservative” repels most lesbians neighborhoods, our cities, and our states. This is and gay men, as do such words as “Christian” and where we will find allies, men and women who “Republican.” Rightly or wrongly, these terms had have seen our faces, who know who we are. Here become code words symbolizing bigotry, fear and we develop the coalitions and power bases that loathing of gay men and lesbians. make elected officials— local, state and national— But I am conservative, Republican and Chris sit up and take notice. Here, too, we must find and tian. God knows, I’m gay, too. Isn’t it possible to nurture new leaders to replace the figureheads of be all four, or have I become a living oxymoron? our national lesbian and gay groups who have The answer eluded me for some time, but is now accomplished little and at great cost. obvious: No, it is not possible, at least for me, not No longer can we give our votes, our contribu in today’s world. tions, and our efforts for the pursuit of vague In my coming out letter to my friend William F. promises. We mustn’t sell the soul of our commu Buckley Jr., which was published in his National nity for “tolerance.” Although we desperately need Review in July 1990,1 aired a premonition that had allies from the U.S. mainstream, we must be satis been haunting me for a long time. “I feel that our fied with only their full and open support for our cause might sink back cause against our into the ooze in which enemies. Indeed, as I cannot associate myself with so much of it rested in we have done so of Rush Limbaugh and other new ten pxt-National Review in the past, we d ay s,” I wrote to will give them our “conservative leaders nor Buckley. “In that dark unbridled aid for with Pat Robertson and his age, the Am erican their steadfast sup Right was heavily, per “Christian ” brigades nor with port. haps dominantly, made In the past—and Jesse Helms and his new up o f bigots, anti- sometimes to the Semites, anti-Catho- consternation of my “Republican majority. lics, the KKK, red African American necks, Know Nothings, a sorry lot of public huck friends— I have compared the gay rights move sters and religious medicine men. Now, times are ment to the black civil rights movement of the ’60s. changing. There is no longer the anti-communist I still believe that they are comparable, and we cement to hold the edifice together. The great have much to leam from the history of this great enterprise...is in danger of sinking back into an quest, both from its setbacks and its victories. aggregate of bigotries.” Now, however, I believe it even more urgent to Alas, my prediction has been realized. The draw a comparison between our community and words “conservative,” “Christian” and "Republi the Jews and homosexuals of Europe in the ’30s can” are being held hostage by the same forces that and ’40s. Then, as now, the majority cried out that controlled the “American Right” before Buckley those who predicted death and misery were crazy, and his band of true believers (of which I was proud that such things as mass extermination could not to be part) made conservatism more mainstream happen, that hysteria was dangerous. Until the and respectable. Of course, even now, there are very last, until they choked on the lethal gas in the still those among the Republican ranks, like Sen. extermination “showers,” they did not accept the Arlen Specter, who attempt to hold the fort against fact that the Nazi state despised them to the point the barbarians. But, they are vastly outnumbered of eradicating them from the face of the Earth. by the descendants of those from a half-century The Jews and homosexuals of Europe were ago who would drag the country back into the victims. We are not. We must never be grateful for swamps of intolerance and division. Can the val mere crumbs off the table at which we have no iant defenders prevail? I don’t believe they can, not place. Neither must we let ourselves be shamed in the foreseeable future. from claiming our identity as gay or lesbian, con Where does this leave me? tent instead to seek shelter under tents whose I cannot associate myself with Rush Limbaugh stakes are planted in the backs of our brothers and and other new “conservative” leaders, nor with Pat sisters. Robertson and his “Christian” brigades, nor with I can no longer call myself a conservative, nor Jesse Helms and his new “Republican” majority. a Christian, nor a Republican. 1 am a gay Ameri The only identity of which I am absolutely certain can, and I will retain my independence from any is that I am a homosexual in a country which has other label. You may, from time to time, still come little patience with us gay folk. upon my thoughts in the gay press. 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