Jvs* out V Jmmumry 1002 ▼ 13
I live in an alien
skin
Yearning for
inclusiveness
Few white gays and lesbians know how to accept and connect
with more than the gay part o f me
Homophobia and racism go hand in hand
by Scot Nakagawa
T
s a teenager, I went through a period
when I spent an incredible amount of
time staring at pictures of freaks, and
thinking about what it would be like
to know them. I had dozens o f friends
with whom I shared the common experience of
racism and poverty, o f youth, the juvenile injus
tice system, sex, stolen car rides, and outrageous
highs. I lived for those friends. But the freaks I
saw in the picture books were special. I connected
with them on another level entirely. For me, they
were right up there with Che Guever a, Lili uokalani,
Marcus Garvey, W ilt Chamberlain, and Cesar
Chavez. Something about them drew me in and
gave shape to an unacknowledged part o f me.
They made me feel real. Now I find myself on the
other side, with a community of eyes bearing
down on me. I wonder, what would I have had the
half-girl, the elephant man, and the two-headed
monster say to me if they could have inserted
themselves whole into the text that surrounded
their pictures?
How are we different?
shelter-even when the shelter is only conditional.
I live in alien skin. I acknowledge every day
How are we alike?
how inescapable the reality o f racism is and how
Our individual experiences are vastly differ
profoundly it affects my life. I come from Hawaii.
ent based on where we sit in relationship to each
The people of my community have suffered colo
other in the hierarchy o f privilege, and power.
Race, gender, and sexual orientation are funda
nization-cultural, political, and psychological
devastation. Our nation has been turned into a
mental to the structure of hierarchy in our society.
combination resort and military reservation. We
It separates us from one another physically. It
imposes an apartheid of the mind and of the spirit
have been robbed o f our land, our language, our
self-determination and national sovereignty. I
upon us in ways which make us tear one another
grew up in a community of peers who lived for the
apart. Unity across these barriers is an act of
day, never sure o f a tomorrow. One in five men
rebellion that could get you killed.
go to jail-half live on public assistance. We try to
Yet, in spite of the differences white racism
place ourselves in the world by looking for people
places between us there are similarities. The
who wear our faces and see them homeless, wear racism which drives white Americans to support
ing army uniforms, in the obituaries, on welfare
war against people o f color in Vietnam, the Middle
lines, in public housing, suffering from alcohol
East, and Latin America and which drives a war
ism, drug addiction, poverty. We see them mak
machine African-Americans must die for more
ing their living by sewing leis, posing in grass
often than any other group, destroys us all. The
skirts, cleaning hotel rooms, dancing and fucking.
military industrial complex robs poor whites of
Syphilis, gonorrhea, chicken pox, and measles
needed services, of health care, housing, adequate
have been killing us for generations. By the time
food, and employment just as surely as it devours
poor people of color. Our common need for
my first friend died o f AIDS, I thought I was all
adequate shelter, food, and health care to remain
cried o u t I was wrong.
alive are more real biological determinants of
In the face o f all of this, we created and re
who we are than racial characteristics.
created our cultural lives over and over again. We
The women’s movement and the gay and
knew how to have fun like only those who believe
lesbian liberation movements so often, and jus
they have no future can.
tifiably, accused of racism, are confronted with
Dealing with homophobia in my home com
those weaknesses now more than ever as gays and
munity was no more or less difficult than in the
women and people o f color find themselves si
white community. The only difference is that
Pacific Island gay men and lesbians lack re multaneously under attack by the racist right,
while fumbling in our struggle to construct a
sources in a community already politically and
unified
defense. As the right wing strips us of our
economically devastated by racism. Making the
civil rights, the weaknesses in American-style
demand for access and inclusion there requires a
“democracy” become painfully clear, and gives a
different approach. You do not yell at the only
renewed sense of urgency to our common need to
people who have provided you shelter while they
confront white racism. Lesbians and gay men of
are selling foods tamps to pay the re n t
color are thrust into double jeopardy. But we are
Being a person o f color in the lesbian and gay
community of Portland is something altogether not alone, and what affects us will affect all of
society.
different Here, the organized and gay identified
What does this mean?
community is dominated by whites. I live and
What we can know about each other is limited
play and organize among white gay and lesbian
by the political realities facing us and the way
people, many of whom would put $100 ten times
these realities shape the social context within
over into workshops to learn to say Asian and not
which
we live our lives. We can only know each
Oriental, but would not put five cents into a
other
through
change and confront the societal
“straight” Asian or Pacific Islander community
barriers which separate us. To do so requires
effort I live in alien skin. Few white gays and
action. We need a real commitment to make
lesbians know how to accept and connect with
change
that goes beyond consciousness raising
more than the gay part of me, which is a tragedy,
workshops and reading essays. We need to move
really. Not so much because of what it means for
beyond the point of looking to acting.
us as individuals, but because of what it reveals
So, this freak show is over. And you still don’t
about us politically.
know me.
But you do not yell at people who offer you
A
▼
by Lynn R. Nakamoto
e all repeatedly experience a
Pacific Islander lesbians, despite our very real
number o f indignities in every
existence, are accordingly invisible.
day life based on sexual orienta
Unfortunately, this invisibility occurs also in
tion. Add to that the hassles
our own cultures and, too often, in the lesbian and
based on sex if you’re a lesbian,
gay community. I struggle for my place despite
and for me, add to that the difficulties active
based silencing
on my or studied neglect of my lesbian
skin color and racial characteristics. Sometimes
ism from my Japanese American culture, and
it is gratuitous abuse. Just this week, my partner
disregard from other quarters based on my being
and I were in an elevator in the parking lot next to
a woman or Japanese.
Pioneer Place in downtown Portland. A hetero
I find interesting, however, that people of all
sexual couple entered the elevator. After we had
stripes tend to be surprised when I say something
stepped out, just before the doors closed, the
about their problems with me because they expect
woman yelled out, in a tone that did not demon
that all Asian women are or ought to be meek and
strate friendly recognition, “Dykes!" She could
submissive. We are not. We are also not mono
have said jap or chink or the like, it happens to me
lithic, as even the group label in which we find
about as often.
ourselves, Asians and Pacific Islanders, indicates.
Ignoring people o f color is only slightly more
I think it is time for us, the lesbian and gay
subtle and yet omnipresent. Take shopping, for
community, to get to know one another, or our
instance. I can be the one who is obviously
social and political endeavors to include everyone
shopping but have salespeople run over to ask my
will continue to fail.
white partner standing next to me if she needs any
Everyone in the lesbian and gay community
help. Or, having made eye contact with someone
should attempt to get to know, learn from, and
behind the counter after being the first one to
trust others who are different from themselves,
approach, have them turn around and say to the
whether socially or in political organizations.
nearest white person, “W ho’s next?” The list is
Lesbians and gay men of color have to go through
endless.
this process o f learning about each other as well.
And then there is television. Just last night,
It is simply not enough to seek out a person of
Dec. 12, one o f the lines on the sitcom “Wings”
color to be in an organization to really bring
referred to a Filipina woman ordered by mail from
together the diversity o f our community. If we
a catalogue, who didn’t work out for the hapless
don’t take the time to discover one another, we
white male character on the show. O f course, that
will often find ourselves missing cues and getting
was assumed to be highly incongruous and thus
wrong impressions-the stuff that leads individu
funny.
als to walk away from participation in the com
I don’t think it is too trite to note that being
munity. Such losses not only demonstrate that we
lesbian, an Asian, and a woman in the United
don’t really care about or value diversity, but that
States is a complex thing that gives me a rich, and
our community is missing valuable perspectives.
sometimes difficult, experience o f and perspec
As a lesbian o f color, I yearn for inclusiveness.
tive on life. I am viewed and treated, however, as
I am encouraged by recent developments in local
if I had separate identities. The incidents above
Asian political organizing. I am also getting to
exemplify a part o f this.
know Asian and Pacific Islander gay men. I am
References like the one on television or the
excited about the possibilities after the recent
omnipresent objectification for mass appeal as
retreat for lesbians o f color sponsored by the
exotica basically define our presence as Asian
Lesbian Community Project I hope to see further
and Pacific Islander women, then, you must be
efforts in 1992, all my communities can benefit
submissive and appealing to men. Asian and
from more people, more views, and more support.
W