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About Just out. (Portland, OR) 1983-2013 | View Entire Issue (Jan. 1, 1986)
4 J -'- - . One’s fun to own, too One's fun to own. one too. V.' ••• •. v -i: .•• The time being (being passing) passing one passing once sensed can't be judged on its merits. Merits one one? Merits one two? Habit demands a singleness of purpose: the purpose of singleness diffused in what had previously seemed to be a perfectly still vessel of water, a jar a jar odor a jar, a door ajar, a door. A jar, adore a cusp, adore a tryst, adore a calm, adore a door ajar, adore a jar, a door is, adore is a door ajar to a door one adores ajar but out. Photo by Helen Lottridge Cruise Bar Silence silence broken by safe banal utterances veiling fragile wishes easy to crack twist and scorn are denied reflection brings tears needing dismissal of all emotion by silence Jan Robbins Just Ouf Jcr u&PA I walk into that cruise bar and fall to the ground. My sensitive soul is impaled on a shard from one of the many shattered dreams and illusions cluttering the floor in that cruise bar. I cry for help, my blood spews for all to see, but no one listens, no one cares. I am break ing the rules of the game in that cruise bar. In my agony I can find no trivial and trite words to attract attention and die in that cruise bar. Jesus, merciful God. please forgive me. St. Nicholas, loving patron, please understand. Mother, please remember that little boy who wandered the orange orchards with a thou sand dreams, for his soul has found happi ness there and not in that cruise bar. 'iic k fly e rs Limits Mother, our possibilities are limitless But our limits are real My love for you/your love for me Is possible without limits Limits you place/l place On the possibilities of each other's existence On the terms of our acceptance of Each other's/our own Limits The hair on his chest bristled out like the grey upturned roots of a dead plant. I eyed him, winsome. Want some? Own some. Once one won one too. I eyed. But meant, or canned, or butt, or but Oh. One won. Some sum, or new mathematics. Odd one out? Won odd out? Even, odd, or odder even, then, and now the odd two even I odd We even Once one Once won Odd won out. Two s fun to own, two s won. W.C. McRae Jan Robbir\s