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About The west shore. (Portland, Or.) 1875-1891 | View Entire Issue (Dec. 1, 1875)
December. THE WEST SHORE. 5 i J the argument, though not willing to adopt J the prayer of Burns' Holy Willie ; 1 O Tboa who In the heavens doit dwelt, I Who as It pleaaei beat Thysel 5 Sends one to heaven and ten to hell I All for the glory, I Andnotlorany food or 111 I They've done before thee, ; Years after that Ben leffthe pulpit (or the j political rostrum and the public crib. I r, know not what his present views are on the ology, but it may be some satisfaction to the orthodox to know that I lean a little ., . more than I then did to the doctrine of , "total depravity" and a good deal less to ward the "final perseverance of the saints' " L dogma. Ben will, of course, "finish his , i course and fight a good fight," politically, : without soiling his sacerdotal robes; but THE UNWRITTEN SIDE GREAT MEN. OF - r UPPER CASCADES (boa iht Block Heiue), COLUMBIA RIVER can he say as did Joe Meek in resigning the office of Territorial Marshal, Feb. 5th, 1846: "From the first organization of the government up to the time of my appoint ment as Marshal of Oregon by the legisla ture I served as sheriff. The duties of my office I discharged with alacrity to the best of.my ability, and which were by no means jfllit, and were performed at no small per sonal sacrifice, for which I received a few dollars nominally nothing." To know why a "few dollars" in those days were "nominally nothing" is to un derstand the "currency," which consisted in orders on stores in Oregon City which liad nothing in them to sell. Joe Meek worked hard and did his duties well con sidering the salary, and the fact that he knew more about trapping among Indians than about law. The greatest blunder I ever heard of his making was at the first term of court he perhaps ever attended, and then in the new roll of sheriff, after having practised thoroughly on his first lesson given him by the clerk. When the clerk ordered him to call John and James Johnson into court, Joe thrust his head through the hole that admitted light into the log abin hall of jus lice, and shouted: "John and Jas. Johnson I John and Jas. Johnson! John and James Johnson I come into court I" Clerk Call one at a time. Sheriff Come one at a time ! Come one at a time; ' Come one at a time! Ckrk You've fixed it now. Sheriff You needn't come; they've fixed it without you! You needn't come; they've fixed it without you! You needn't come; they've fixed it without vou! We always think of great men in the act of performing deeds which give them re nown or else in stately repose grand, silent and majestic. And yet this is hardly fair, because the most gracious and magnifi cent of human beings have to bother them selves with the little things of this life which engage the attention of us smaller people. No doubt Moses snarled and got angry when he had a severe cold in his head, and if a fly bit his leg while he was in the desert, why should we suppose he did not jump and use violent language and rub the sore place f And Caisar isn't it tolerable certain he used to become furious when he went up-stairs to get his slip pers in the dark and found that Calphurnia had shoved them under the bed so that he had to sweep around for them wildly with a broom handle! And when Solomon cracked his crazy bone, is it unreason able to suppose he ran around the room, and felt as if he wanted to cry? Imagine George Washington silting on the edge of the bed and put ting on a clean shirt, and growling at Martha because the buttons were off ; or St. Augustine with an apron around his neck having his hair cut; or Joan of Arc holding her front hair in her mouth, as women do, while she fixed up her back hair; or Martin Luther in a night-shirt trying to put the baby to sleep at two o'clock in the morning; or Alexander the Great with the hiccoughs; or Thomas Jef ferson getting suddenly over a fence to avoid a dog; or the Duke of Wellington with the mumps; or Daniel Webster abus ing his wife because she hadn't tucked the covets at the foot of the bed; or Benjamin rranklm paring his corns with a razor; or Jonathan Edwards, at the dinner table, wanting to sneeze just as lie got his mouth full of hot beef; or Noah standing at his window at night throwing bricks at at a cat! A Candid Urciiik. Whnt did your mother sav. mv little mail ? Did vou uiru her mv card '1 " iukcu un inciiwnenceu y iuiik Ki'imemnii 01 a , i'uuuuuku. little boy whose mother hftd uivett him nil invito- , a tion to lull Uioii her, and whose street duor was . , . . c , , . . occonlilnly opened to hil untimely luiiimoiii by LOIlSollltlOII tOI' old lllitllls the urciiin fortunes never come si nifl v." " Yt;s, air, saul tlia urciiin quite innocently, "and mother said, if yon were not a n itural born I AVliitt (1il(4 mi Inmost in'iuM'l' lln with his goods? Ho gives them RESPECTABLE EMPLOYMENT. The idea of respectable employment is the rock upon which thousands of new comers split and shipwreck themselves and all who depend on them. All employments are respectable that bring honest gain. The laborer who is willing to turn his hands to anything is as respectable as the banker or store-keeper. Indeed, the man who is ready to work whenever work offers, whatever it may be, is far more respectable than one who turns up his nose at hard labor, stands on street corners cursing the country, wearies his friends with com plaints because he can get nothing respect able to do, pockets their benefactions with out thankfulness, and goes from day to day a useless, lazy grumbler. TO OUR PATRONS. The ootumni of the WT Shobb offer superior inducements te ad vertiser!. The majority et our subscribers tie the paper to ban it bound at the eud of the volume (subscribers generally do that with illustrated paperi), thereby rusk inn your card more valuable than in an ordinary publication. Our circulation ia larve eecond to Bone tn Oregon; and another and moat important advantage we keep the columna of the Wbst 8uo PUKE. We do not, and never will, admit advertisement! from quacka, lottenea, vanity fairs and kindred adrertiaen. Any one reading an advertisement in the Wlaj Sbobb can he certain that the party advertising ia reliable and worthy of patronage. Appreciating the very liberal patronage bestowed en us so far, we hare concluded to eularge to twelve pages In January, and at the earns time, or OS soon there after ai practicable, to dress the West SnoBa 1b an entire new suit, now being cast especially to order for ua. Utill, even a twelve-page paper te not what we are aiming at We want one of atiteen pagee, to be published at the aame price 91 60 per aunum ; aud we ean do it ith the help of our present patrone. If everyone who ia now a subscriber will, during thia month, Influence some friend or neigh bor to become a subscriber, wo could double our circulation without the aiponse of canvassers, and would give you the benefit of it by at once enlarg ing to sixteen pogea. If you cannot influence your neighbor, aubscribe for an extra copy yourself to send to some friend abroad. The larger our paper, the more useful, Interesting mid influential wo can make it, and the more good we can accomplish for the entire Facitlo northwest. We know of a similar publication to ours issued in California which receives a bonus from the State of 91,000 per annum. We ask for no bonus. All we want is legitimate advertising and subscript A fow more of these snappy morn ings aud no house-fly will care a copper whether the family he lives with means to run in debt for their cord-wood or pay cash. If they want to pull 'cm back alt the meu iu the land can't stop 'em. Why is a doctor better tnken care of than his patients? Because, when he goes to bed, somebody is sure to rap him up. Grandfather to his hopeful ' My son, which would you rather have when yon get home, n little brother or a little Bistort"' Grandson " Well, I would rather have a little pony." Take care ot the poor Indian aud he'll take hair of the white mau. 5ut LOWER MULTNOMAH FALL. COLUMBIA RIVER. Tux list or Uiwni that Profenor Herrmann, lb world rr now net, Magltilan, will vlalt altar tha oluaeorhlaeiitfninmnntlnthli city, appeara oa thoaeventb pueor Tin Wut Bhom, During tlio piial wotik tlio I'l-ofraeor ha been greeted here with crowded hmura, and our country ooimlni will certainly tula a treat If they fell to aoe hlui. Go by all mourn. i ? Tim Now Style Home Shuttle Hewing Marhln I (mining excellent reputation, and art) tow) ly InGTOiuhig, Judging from the number mnt out from the Hlenroom, oomnr Morrlnon and Tlilnl Htrunu. Mr. Trover Inform u that Inqui ries for price IIhIn mid application foragflncle am conilnit by every moll. The low prlne and tw, lnganpiilile.il doliiKlhe lieavleat klmla ofwork, .tnlliHtmiitfiit)oliitn in lu, fuvor. Illmttrnted drmilnrniml full pnrtlrular will be forwarded by mldrcMNlnii llin Agent. Tim favorably-known Howo Sowing Midi In Co. ban aunt out a larg number of machine withlu the pnit few days. They art intended for holiday priuiita forwivea and sweetheart. Tlio Huwo U the oldoat machine in tlio market, and ia Tory popular. A. M. Ciumron, agent, corner Aider and Third. 'Mis foul, you wouldn't come on Mouilny morning, time urtiun evttryuony wiu wiimim At tliix jiiiii'ture. luaimna, with aswect nmile of i V1IV fit Woilfll). im) ni i lie eim ol the , 1 - ' wt'lromc. nimh) bur amn'iimni' hull, whmi, to bur tiurprine, Mr. Voritwpht, the Tin ner. lM)ltr(l. Wlint in tin) world duet the mm mean !' " iu quirvd the mother. "I dutnio," rqilied the urchin; "guess hc'i forgot luthiii V I Ail editor lias had ivlurned to ' him a book borrowed twenty seven veun njt;o, and bi'gins to have boj-cs tot' humuuitv after all. 7oOi'BAMATKirnKi,on,8Ta.-OwlhK to the groat prena of other reading matter, we are compelled to dinetiM), for thin month only, with our uiual article on tiuriculture. S-Airi.niN(t Iluos. in Central Markut make the lkt dHlay of holiday mwitn of any butcher in Portland. Oo ami too tlnin. I ":x ' ' r-""?'1 ! ;- - ; - ' !.'-!''.- ' " RESIDENCE OF DONALD .MACLEAV, COR, YAMHILL AND THIRTEENTH ST5., PORTLAND. At TimUreat Eut ern Clothing Store of W. Hnrrii, in Uou nattea' building, may be found an immetue . toclt of faahiooabl clothing. A Baitrrirut diipla of holiday preaenU may be teen at U Jewelry itora ot D. L. Htone, 103 Front it. at price that dofjr iumiMitition. W. II. UOKNUTII, IU Pint tnet. baa a card la to-day' Wut HiiokK. gifing price llataof crockery aud glaatwart auitabl for holiday prewnta. Head it. llr TUB Aax Mr. 8. L. Htona, eornar Firrt and Aah ttrveU, re ccited a large ihip meut of pur Baa Fraoeitoo end French oaudi; u well aa tneerechaum pipee and cigar boldera. with eaaei, match boiae, o J tut the kind of goods uitabl for holiday pmenta.