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About The Independence west side. (Independence, Or.) 18??-1891 | View Entire Issue (Aug. 15, 1901)
Salt Rheum You ttuy call It emma, tetter or milk cruet. Bui no matter what you call It, thli skin dlaca which nmiH tu patch that burn. Itch, dlaoharit watery nutter, dry nd "I, oh lit eilateno to Uw preeenc ul humor In th ystom. It will continue to Mist, annoy, and per haps mvxilie, at loiif I be a humor remain. It la always radically and prtunntly cured by Hood's SarsaparlUa which xpl all humor, and I positively ttiMualhid for all cutaiMou eruptions. A Satisfactory Scar. "You never seem to give even a thought of your ancestor," "Oh, yes, I do; 1 oft rejoice that, within public remit leet ion, none of them vr got hanged," Th Joyi of Houj Clunlnj. Hulihy Ah, my dear, you ace I have come homo from tho offtoe nil hour earlier than usual ! Wife oil, yon dear, good man! I was just wondering who I could got to tak up these carpets! A Mm of Court,. She 1 didn't suppose you hud the nerve to kiss ni. If Oh, ya, I have got nerve enough to do anything. Too Much Criticism. "I hear your husband is ill, Mm, Jones." ( "Yes'tim." "Nothing serious or critical, I hope?" "Critical? I should say he were. He ain't satisfied with nothin" he ain't." " His Imprwilon. "Mandv." said Farmer Corntossel, "I guess it would be just as well not to say m much about homo coolcitr when you are talkin' up your summer board. "Why not!" '"Cause some of these feller act, to me. like that waa what they was tryin to get away from." VIVA IWmmiiI Cured. No AM af eervouaaaai r 1 1 0 aftar Sral .(' uaaof lr Kllaa'illnal Nam Baatorar. aud fur r K KK 4.Mltial MUaawl Iraat an. Da.g-11 Ktia,UJ-. archW..mOaa.ltia.', Slmpl Whan You Know. "I was up in the mill district today. Frightfully noisy up there," "That's right. I've got a friend who lives up there. Ho can't hear himself talk in his house." "My! Boiler shop next door?" , "Xo, He's deaf and dumb." No Disappointment' "Isn't your new house taking long er to build than you expected?" "Oh, no, I've only apent twice as much on it, so far, as I anticipated " Two-fold. Sniffs There is more sin in Chi cago than in any othel city on the face of the earth. Snuffs I beg to differ. "I defy you to name another with more sin in it. " "Cincinnati." Keeping Up Appesrsncts. Excited man (to reporter) Now, in writing up the story of the burg lary of my house, you must say that they overlooked $4,000 in the cup- Reporter (incredulously) Really? Excited Man ea. lou see, l don't want the publio to know that they oould go through my house and only find $32 worth of silver and stuff worth stealing. Disproved. "He can't be a good business man. Why, he is a college professor." "But he has married the daughter of a millionaire." Wired Them st Reit "You want the pockets to run up and down, I suppose," said the tailor. "No, sir," the irritable customer replied. "I prefer stationary pock ets. You may make the Blits perpen dicular, however." CASTORIA For Infants and Children. The Kind You Have Always Bought Bears the p If Signature of Luty cUcit. The Liter! Mind. "Tommy, how many wars has the United States been engagedi n?" "Five, sir." "Enumerate them." "One, two, three, four, five." Why s Plsy Is Like s Cigar. Henry J. Byron, one of the wit tiest of English playwrights of a score of years ago, remarked on one occasion : ' "A play it like a cigar. If it's good, everybody wants a box. If it's bad, all the puffing in the world won't make it go." RJJeirBiuiry 2 oua medicine ' , , . even when administered In very small doses, and few constitutions can stand it for any length of time. Potash produces inflammation of the stomacn and bowels, and a dangerous form of dyspepsia and often chronic diarrhoea follow its use. Now, the doctors will tell you u you n.- lnnwr Contagious Blood Poison yon mut take these minerals '".Xtl ttebones become disease!, sud flu muscle, and Kta never hope to completely eradicate u When X was about twsnty-one years of e. or la-hteo? y. ago, I eontrait.d Blood Pol.on in a. bad fcrmf an" m '.ati.n.d that th. MV" the OlHiM wmb.ii-" Kh.iAnv inva.ua or anaeu my my life. cam unaer in ihbumo u o. - r----' Dlotoh. and pimple gradually dUappeored tal sMa of 8. S. so oviaono oi n w- - ulna year old, and hT seep, no ;lgn the pat eighteen year. B. 8. 8. doo Jo. if. . WI. EMEBSON; Mnaa of th dlsoa was lert for prcSf Z it 3 K ing wTatever. The Renef WhU ImoJove. a the SpeciEc purges the system of impurities,, and as new. rich blood &. to flowin Z veinsPthf un.ightfy sores and other evidences of blood po.son dkaooear strena returns and you are forever rid of this loathsome disease. : OuThou iTfeatment Book on Contagious Blood PoUon te l. you all about the motoms dhTerent stages, etc., of this disease. We will mail you a copy free. tvotning and may hasten your cure. THE SWIFT SPECIFIC CO, ATLAN I A, tiA. 1 li tXJit tlm to TJT CttfcTTh, Hronchltli and Coutuuiption. Oar remtdy li guarantted, 91 D TV. Ctnw Bid. V. H. 8MITH I CO., Buffalo, N. T. MU On Coawiliiloa, "Does your artist friend have many commission?" "I believe h had one last year. His father-in-law asked him to paint the barn." SuMtstM Mind Rwdlag. "Reynold," aid the oldest mem bor of the firm, "how do you pll which?" " "W-h-l-c-h," responded the other. "That' what I thought," rejoined the older member, covertly scratch ing a "t" out -of the word ho had wriltei. Milt Mar CtmlrfVltlf . Tli Secret Service lias miearlhttl another tutnil of countertViiera ami MHUrmt a larvs i)UniUv or bonus hills, which ar so olvr- ly n'mw nisi ins aver person wuuia never aiiMvect Ihton ul belli simrloua. ThliiKS of nwal valitsar ! aelecte,! tor imitation, noUlilv Hosteller' ftloiitacn Ulnar, which has many Imitator hut no equal for iln.Hlara Ilk Indigestion, dvs peiwt. conn i pat wm nrvoiisns and un iat debility. Always s to relttl dm, giata who iiava tlx reputation of giving hat tuu aik lor. NscsmHUi Com first la Texts. On account of a scarcity of brick in a Texas town the congregation of the local church allowed their new edifice to remain unfinished while a saloon was being erected. Syndic! Dsflasd. "Papa, what is a snydicate!" "My son, it is a body ot human beings entirely surrounded by money. ' A Strsltht Tie. Gentleman (caressing a pretty lit tle girl) You little beauty! You shall ho my wife when you are grown up. Will you? "No, I don't want to get married, but aunty there would like to." M.r Prld. "Sue had lieen married three times before site got her present husband, hadn't she."' "Yes, and he is such a patriotic man alio calls him her glorious Fourth." 1 do not heller I'tso's Ours for Con umiition has an equal for coughs and colds, Johs P. Hurts, Trinity riprlugs, lnd., Feb. IS. JWO. EmlMAce. "She married a poet, didn't she? And is lie successful?" "Oh. yes, remarkably so. Why his name is a household word on two continents, and last year hi income was nearly 300. Mr. B'l Supposition. "Since Spifllns lost his teeth he can't speak distinctly nor eat proper food," remarked Mr, liloomtield. "I suppose he has begun to live on gum drops and speak gum Arabic," added Mr. I'elletleld. YOUR HOME AND FENCES. No Men Can Conveniently Go Without Either of These Ntceiiltle. You may as welt talk about going without eatitm as going without fences. If you have a house and home you must have a fence around it. If you have a farm you must mark its boundaries by fences, and also shut in the stock with fence. A fence ia In many ways as import ant as a man's house. As a common ity grows the subject of fences assumes more and more prominence. The success of the "Anchor" fence in tha.yuitd.Btate hits been- phe nomenal for the chief reason that it combine economy, strength and beauty in a way that instantly ap. neals to everybody. In the r.asteru states , where it has lieen known Ion ger, the factories making it are nressed to full capacity. In this state, where it is comparatively new, its widespread adoption seems to lie only a question ol the agents getting around and showing their wares to the neonlo. There is ample reason for all the talk Boinir on about the "anchor" (once, as it is solving the great fence problem satisfactorily. It is not only well aduuted to ornamental work, but it is the biggeBt kind of a blossing to stock raisers and ranchmen gener ally. It is made of heavy wire and the joints are held rivet-tight by the patent "anchor" clanis. It does not cost as much as the old-fashioned fences, vet it lasts practically forever, It is worth anyone's while to write to the manufacturers. The Portland Anchor Fence Co., 742, Nicolai Street, Portland, Oregon, for catalogue aiid pictures explaining their wonderful fence. Rcpsrlee. He How do you feol when f bea you at whist? She Not quite so bad as you feel when your friend Jenkins beats you at poker. Alsi for Aspiration! Old Oentleamn So you think my daughter loves you, sir, and you wish to marry her? . Dudolcigh That's what I called to Bee you about. Is there any insanity in vour family? "No sir; and there's not going to beany." I oy 8. B. S. i the only allflAla inr this de structive virus, and an infallible remedy for thispeculiarpoison. It destroysand eradicates every particle of the poison, and makes the blood as healthy and pure as before the dis- wa tf-ntirrnctod. Z A my eytm S.. the sore, --- ---- -- of It lnir all you olalm Fovoly, o. Vtiown. and we offer 1 1,000 I In Mm Bold by dniwlntt. 1 1 NAVY'S NEW SHIPS. Powers Must Doff Their Hats to Our Latest War Vessels. M0NARCIIS0FTI1KSKA Ships of Wir Now Building Will Bt tht Most Powerful Afloat. UatttMhlii anil I'rnUere lieacrlbed- lat New Main Nearly Twice ae lara a lis 111-fated N.mca.ka Th Crulaar Kiel In Ughllng Rlronilh and id-Hut alnlr la Moll Arisor-Oriat Gun of High Powor In the ll,ttsrl. M'l.K HAM, ny lViinsylvitnl (irit, ml Wlliliunspoi't, I building M) war vessels uf various kinds. 'J'lieso. when completed, will, It Is esti mated, give us one of the l"t effec tive mi vie In Ilia world. Five of these new vessels are to be flist-elns battleship. Till 1 our present aimro in me world's ncllvlty In the building of war- ships. The remarkable activity ns played by other powers In thl Hue of enterprise Is ominous, tt Is liieumliont ttlKin us to be prepared for what limy come tun of this feverish desire to ac quire formidable sen lighters, At the present time tireut Hrnain I hulldlnx four first cms battleship, hrce tlrsi-elitHs armored enilsem and other ship to the number of two, with ninny oilier prolei'ti d. Slue the nun- ineiicetueut of 'ust year she has laiiuch- ed Vi new vessels and Is now contem plating building a uumbvr of subma rine boat and i!4 other vessel of war. Russia Is building uo less tbau ill new war vessels. During the year Russia ba launched three battleships, two of which were built lu this country.' Klve first clns battleships are being built by (leriimny, two cruisers, mi ar mored cruiser and a niiintor of torpedo boat destroyers. France bus laid down 12,000-ton armored cruiser, after hav ing launched three already timing the year, as well as a number of torpedo buatuWruyur and submaiiuu boat. Th American Nstv. The American building program In cludes six nruiored cruisers. Tung of these will be sheathed ami will colisll tute a most foruilduhl part of our Davy. The cruiser will be named re spectively the Nebraska, California, Maryland. Colorado, West Vlrglula and Bouth Dakota. The displacement of the ilteuthed vessels will be 13,800 tons, and that of the unsheathed cruisers. 13,400 tons. In speaking of these new battleship and cruiser, ex t blcf Naval Construe tor Rear-Adinlriil Philip lllchboru says; "It can be stated with complete a' atirance that the designs embody In an unusually well developed degree all the elements of sea wort Illness, offensive and defensive power, speed and coal endurance and thut In all essentials they are superior to nil previous h signs of similar character produced In thl or any other country. "The battery carried by these vessels I unquestionably the heaviest battery afloat. Tli arrangement of It Is such as to give a powerful bow, stern and broadside fire. For the 12-luch and 8-tnch gun tho Ameiicnii system of mounting In turrets has been adhered to. "Special provision will be made for Insulating mngnxlnes by air spaces, and also for cooling them by direct con nections with the refrigerating plnnt, "The battery will consist of four 12' Inch, eluht 8-Inch and Vi (Much, Tl ) econdary battery will consist of li 8-luch (U -pouudei'H), 12 8 -pounders, four 1-Dounder (automatic), four 1- ' pounders (single shot), two ll-lnch field guns, two machine guns, six u.hu Cttn iber autoniutle guns, uud two submerg ed torpedo tubes. "The four 12-iuch guns are mounted In pairs, on the middle line bf the ' vessel, In electrically controlled bal ance, elliptical tui'rents, having an arc of Are of 270 degrees. Of the 8-luch guns of the Pennsylvania class, four , will be mounted In pairs In two elllptl cal turrets superposed on, and rigidly 'connected to the 12-lnch turrets, and four In pairs In tvo electrically con' trolled elliptical, balanced turrets, with Inclined port plates, one on each beam. and with an arc of fire of 180 degrees, ( The eight 8-Inch guns of the Virginia cluss will be mounted In pairs In four .electrically controlled elliptical, bal anced turrets, with Inclined port plntes, 1 one on each beam near the forward end ' of the superstructure, and one on each J beam near the after end of the super structure the guns so mounted to train through an arc of 145 degrees. The 1 12 0-Inch guns will be mounted In broadside on the gun deck, six on each side, and will have an arc of fire to 110 degrees. "There will be ample provision for supplying ammunition to the guns, and chains of supply being so distributed that there will be a complete round of powder and projectiles delivered by each 12-Inch turret hoist every 90 sec- v . ' THE OHIO v ' , ; j ... r . ,., ... i, -,-, .a r n l ' V , -t '" -'?'' , m. TUB oiiils. one conuilete round of oowder ami project lie by each 8 Inch turret hoist every oil seconds, and a supply of ammunition for the u Inch guns sum- lent to provide three complete rouuu tier niluute for each auu. Th rate of supply of ammunition for the Im pounders will be six round per minute for each gun, There will h two auu mcriTCd torpedo IiiIh-s located la one compartment. "The armored cruiser, all In iium- lr. will have length of Wi fwt, beam thl feet 0 Inches and a trial dls idaeoment of 8.400 toll au 24 feet 0 Incite draught, the coal buuker capac ity being 2.000 tun. 'The armored cruiser outlined In the accompanying plana ant Identical In dimension. Interior arraniretueut and batteries, the only variation being that throe are sheathed with wood and coppered and three are unsheathed. They are designed for a speed of at least 22 knot and will have very tarice radius ot action. "The armament will be mounted as follows: Four 8 Inch guns, In pairs. In two electrically controlled elliptical. balanced turret, having Inclined port plates, one forward ami one aft on the lino of the keel, and having au arc of lire of 270 degree. On the up per deck, at the corner of the super structure, four O lncb guns will bo mounted on simiiisous, one at each cor ner, each hiivln,( au arc of Are of not less than 143 deurees. On the nut In or gun deck 10 tl Inch gun In broad- r 'u , m tit -t i ; A COAST i)FIC.S SHIP. side will be mounted, five on each side, having an arc of lire of not less than 110 degrees: that Is B3 degrees forwjird of and ubaft the beam, except the for ward pair, which are to bo spoiisoncd and will fire directly ahead. The secon dary battery will be mounted In the most commanding positions, having as large an arc of fire as possible; the au tomatic 1 -pounders to be mounted In the lower military tops, and two single shot 1-pounders In each upper military top. "Suitable means will be provided for a rapid and efficient supply of ammuni tion for nil tho guns of tho main and secondary batteries. The rato nt which ammunition will be supplied to the 8 Inch turret hoists Is one complete round of powder and projectile to each hoist every BO seconds. The rate of supply of ammunition for the 0-luch guns will bo three complete rounds per minute to each gun. The rate of supply of am munition for the 14-pouuder guns will be six rounds per minute to each gun. The rate ot supply of ammunition for the 3-pounder and 1-pouuder guns will 1 1 10 rounds per minute to each gun. ' "The protected cruisers will have a length of 424 feet, beam 00 feet and a trial displacement of about 0,700 tons on 23 feet 0 Inches draught, the coal blinker capacity being 1,000 tons. "On the main deck will be mounted six 0-inch guns on pedestal mouuts, with shields. Two of these guns will be mounted on the middle Hue of the vessel, one forward and one aft, each having an arc of fire of not less than 270 degrees. The other four 0-Inch guns an the main deck will be mounted In sponsons at the corners of the super structure. "On the gun deck eight O lncb guns will be mounted, four on each broad side, In a central casemate, the forward and after pairs being lu sponsons di rectly under the 0-Inch guns nt the cor ners of the superstructure on the dock above. "Twelve 14-pounders will be mounted on the gun deck, three forward and three aft on each side. Six 14-pounder guns will be mounted, within the super structure, three on each side. The .'13 8-pounder scml-automatlc guus will be mounted on tue superstructure In the lower military tops the four heavy 1 -pounder automatic guns will be mounted, two on each mast. In he upper military tops four heavy l-pouttd- er rapid-fire guns will be mounted, two on each mast. The remaining fifur heavy 1 -pounder rapid-fire guns willbe mounted on the gun deck, two forwlrd and two aft Arrangements wllllbe h". ' . . . r t ft, ' ( ' I ' . , , , - . qUAUTKK DECK OF A IIATTI-K8U1P. made whereby all the gun which do not train fore and aft, or nearly so, can be quickly and conveniently dismount d, housed and secured, so as to leave the ship's side practically clear. "There will be a sufficient number of electric power hoists direct from the iimgnilne to the battery deck to fur ulali so ample aupply of ammunition to all the gum of the malo and secondary batteries; alio suitable mean for sup plying the guns In the tops. The rate of aupply of ammunition for the 0 Inch guns will be not less than six complete rounds to ach gun per niluute. The rate of supply of ammunition for the 14 pounder guus will be not less than 13 rounds to each gun per minute. The rate of supply for the 3 'pounder guns will be not less than 30 round to each gun pr minute, and for the 1 -pounder rapid Hi guus not less than 30 rounds to each gun per minute, while for the 1-pomuier automatic guus tho supply will be not less thou 100 rounds to each gun per minute." The accompanying Illustration show the models on which some of these for midable craft are built or are being built. The battleships will be 433 feet long, TO feet 10 Inches broad, and the great est draught will lie 20 leet. Three sheathed ships will each have a dis placement of 15,000 tons; two unsheath ed. 14.000 ton. They will cost about $1,000,000 each, exclusive of the armor and guns. The cruisers tisve the fol lowing dimensions: length, 502 feet; .a I a.rs a Mi.i l f -'""" --- l at 1 MfSI ' " breadth, 70 feet; draft, 20V4 feet. The cost limit Is S4.000.000 each. These ships will have au aggregate touuage greuter than the tonnage of all vessels of all kluds In the naval estab lishment a decade ago. They will cost tho government about $71,300,000 when they are ready for commission. The cruisers will bo practically twice as big and powerful as the New York and Drooklyn, which figured In the fight off Santiago. Every armored cruiser will be fitted as a flagship and will have accommodations for 822 officers and men. The speed must be at least 22 knots an hour. The battleships will be the moBt powerful ever projected, although the Navy Department Is con sidering plans for a ship of 1,000 tons greater displacement, and to carry un exampled batteries of heavy and high power guus, I.eaann of th Bpunlah War. If there Is one lesson that was taught by the war with Spain It was the value of a navy, and the United Btates gov ernment has not been slow to tuke ad vantage of the kuowledge that It ob tained by this experience lu actunl warfare. Lord Brassey In his review of the late unpleasaniues emphasized tho fact that the United States needed more ships to have an Ideal navy, for no Question could be raised as to the ability of the men engaged In her sea service. Although Lord Brnssey was one of the first persons of note to express this opinion, the fact that our uavy.was not In a condition to cope with a powerful and well-drilled force had long been known to the naval authorities of this country, but the trouble had been to persuade Congress to make the appro priation necessary to carry out the plans that had been devised. When the war came, however, econ omy In this particular branch of the service was uo longer possible, and when the war had ended the peoplo had learned such a lesson that they were willing to spend money In the Improvement of their armored vessels. They had learne4 that great battles are often fought on the sea, and that to win these battles good men are not all that are needed, uooa snips must oe pro vided, find the country Is now working to provide these ships Just as quickly as possible. When the fact Is considered that It was but a few years ago that this coun try was actually Inferior to China In Us strength on the seas, the wonderful progress that we have made to the third place In rank among naval powers may be better appreciated, and the fact ii a': K ji r r v - ', -f . that our navy I so new means that It Is practically up-tu-ditte, and this alirne Is a (treat advanliiije In time of conflict. There Is no reason, therefore, why we should not feel eucouragod to believe that with our sea fluhtlng aery Ice of men and ships we would he able O THE ACARSArtOf to hold our own with any power In the world. Captain Slgsbee, who commanded the Malue. when It was blown up lu Ha vana harbor, has applied for the coin maud of tho new Maine. Between the new Maine aud the old are few points of resembliiuce. The first was rated as a second class battleship with a dis placement of ottly 0.US2 tons. Her namesake Is nearly twice as large, dis placing 12.3HO tous at normal draught. The principal dimensions of the new battleship are: Letigth between per pendiculars, !ISS leet; length over all, 3u3 feet 10'i Inches; extreme breadth. .72 f cut;, men u 4t a ughLLf coLtf . I u c hoa.; - displacement at normal draught, 12,300 tons; estimated displacement at full load draught, 13,300 tons. As tc type, the now vessel Is to be an Improved Alabama, two knots faster than that fine battleship, equipped with a more powerful armament and hedged about with a greater area of armor protec tion. In the contract It is stipulated that she must on her official trial maintain a speed of 18 knot for four consecutive hours. , t The armu incut designed for the vessel Is a very powerful one. J'twlll consist of four 12-lnch breech-loading rltlos mounted lu pairs In two elliptical, bal anced turrets, one forward and one aft. In addition there will be 10 (1-Inch rapid fire guns mounted In broadside, six 14 pounders, eight 3 -pounders, six 1-miunders, two Colt automatic nud two 3-Inch rnpld-Hre Held guns. In the Maine the 14-pounder type of rapid fire Kttn will be Installed for the first time on an American battleship. There Bre two submerged torpedo tubes on the shin, the Malue class being also the first In which these tubes have been placed below water line. Krnpp armor varying from 7 to 11 Inches In thickness will be provided. The Maine Is a sister ship of the Ohio which President McKlnley went to San Francisco to see launched. The turrets are turned by electricity, and the motors used for this purpose can revolve one of these great turrets through 300 degrees lu one minute. The armor of both the turrets and barbettes Is 12 inches thick. The mngitislues and shell rooms ,nf the ship can stow 240 rounds of the 12 lnch ammuulllon, 3,200 rounds of the 0 lncl ammunition, 0,000 rounds of the 0 pottuder aud 4,000 rounds of the 1 pounder, Tho forward magazines are located Immediately forward of the dy namo rooms and the after ones Just abaft the engine rooms. The Ohio carries 14 boats, of which one is a 40-foot stentn cutter and an other a 3(l-foot steam cutter of the usual navy type. , Her complement Is 33 officers and 511 men. Italian and Ul Noble Work. Italy mourns one of her noblest phil anthropists, Dr. l'letro Pumserl, who re cently died, aged D2. After graduation at the University of Paris, he made tho rescue and rehabilitation of malformed and muloi'ganlzed children his profes sional metier. Kor well-nigh thirty years ho lubored among the poor of Milan, bringing under special treatment every Infuntile victim to faulty or fee ble development, and earned a truly wonderful reward In rearing thousands of apparently hopeless cases to the nor mal Btature and strength, physical and mental, of their more fortunate fellows, New York Post. o u cuius,. -. ,. FARM MACHINERY 3 X3 rr llt imaallila to hiillit. Urn malarial. Hoamro. IHirlKin. Hat Slilall. MaliO-al Mlimlin. HMlljr NT h V KM III)., lat and 1a lur ., euMlawl.or. I Wholesale Boots and Shoes KRAUSSE & PRINCE, 87 and 89 First Street, Portland, Oregon. All Kinds Carried In Stock. Licking In Melody. Jones Van Pounder's latest music is bald stun. Hniitli Why bald? Jones Because it need an "air restorer." Getting Back to Torm. "Is your ma well again, Eddio?" "Well, yes'm, but sho ain't quite up to her old form yet. Pa fought a draw wid her last night." Mothora will find Mr. Wlnlow' Bonth- JMyrup lb best nmiwly to ns lor their Uliun during th twthtng period. Alter the Rwc ncilUtioa. Dooley Say, llooley, gin me a punch on th' jaw opposite phwere yc kicked me. llooley Phat for. Dooley I want yet to straighten out mr face. Henc tht Terra. Clarence Why do you say the wedding was patriotic? Algernon Well, the bride whs red, the groom was white and tier father, who had all the bills to pay, was blue. Both. Mrs. Jack Our congregation has sent the minister to Kurope to get a rest. Mr. Jack Whom, the minister or the congregation. for Others. "It sounds funny to hear you talk ing that way. When wc were at col lege you didn't Miove in eternal punishment at all." "1 know, but I didn't have any enemies then." Marriage, and Longevity. Marriage, according to Dr. Schwartx, of Her I In, ts the most Important factor In longevity. Of every 200 persons who reach the age of 40 year 125 are mar ried and 73 unmarried. At 00 years the proportions are 48 to 22; at 70 years. 27 to 11, and at 80 years, 0 to 3. Fifty centenarians bad all bceu married. The doctor asserts that the rate of mor tality for husbands and wives between th 'ages of 30 and 45 ts 18 per cent., while that for unmarried prsonsls2S per cetit. Holtt's School. At Matiln Park. 811 Matro County, Cat., with Ha bratiltnil, aiirmuiHllniia, perfect climate, careful MiiierviBinn, thuroiiKH tnttrucitim, roniplei laboratories, ami sy in nun nun, eaally maintains ita poaliUm In the front rauka uf f('hnil lor huva on the Pacific Coast. Ira 0. Unlit, Ph. I)., Principal. Fruit Dressing for Bhor. The best dressing for black leather Is orange juice. Take a slice or quarter of an orange and rub It thoroughly all over the shoe or boot and allow It to dry. Then brush briskly with soft brush until It shines like a looking glass. A most convenient dressing for tan shoes is the Inside of a banana skin. This Is ruobed well and evenly all over the shoe, and removing all Bp'ots and dirt ns well as giving a fine polish, which last Is brought out by using a j flnnnnel cloth for wiping dry and an other dean flannel for polishing. A slice of lemon Is also used as a tat leather dressing. Patent leather must never he blacked or polished with any thing hut an oil. They are the hardest kind of shoes to keep In good order. It Is necessary to take a clean sponge and clean them from all dirt before apply ing the oil. It may then be rubbed dry at once with a flannel or other soft cloth which will not scratch the patent finlsh.-Commerelal Tribune. BEST FOR rtfuakaaaaaaiA CANDY J CATHARTIC j LIVER TONIC j UVUWrtkWstiWWif $ MILD BUT I I SURE J giVJValaaMW. a. A t-rVtf rtT OV wvij Bammmt BOON FOR i i MOTHERS j WtaaawvaaaaaaaaaaaakA CURE CONSTIPATION ! NEVER SOLD IN BULK aswvaraaaaaaa-aaaaaaaa si w v n II a ' a JL TCtSWBUW. 4 .m.-rrr.. .rrr..,, t.-- W 0J-J oCggglr ALL OR I PURELY J VEJGEJA8LEj h tff nVWI A Of i-lll 06 Pl4 to n7 rBaer o' thi paper yrho win ra vpllU KLYYAKU port to us any attempt of substitution, or sale of " something just as good" when Cascaiets are called tor, ana furnish evidence ujpos wuica wc AND SUPPLIES. Ensilage Cutter. IW sod only on th mrkt, Sanii Un flraslar. Nlh'ball, Uwl A Slarar Co. Porllanit, Or. JOHN POOLE, Portland, Oregon, fooi at Morrlaoa Suset, Can give yoa tho best bargain Is Bnggi. Plows, Boiler and Kngino. Win imiil and Pnmp and General Machinery. o before baying. Catalogue Furnished Upon Application. SCHOOLS KDC0LLE6ES. OBKtlON. FOItTUSD, St. Holon't Sotoot to Olrh. Tlilrtr-thlrd-ffsr. fomniodioii build Ills'. Mislarn )illplnenl. Academic and colli- preparatory couraM, S clal rourai-a lu niu:c and art. Illus trated claluiic, MISS IlfSNOI TIIIETTI. frisel!. HILL MILITARY ACAIM.MY A Private School For boardlne and day onplls. ill in SoptvintH-r IS. rln new bulltflii. The principal has had luenty-lhroe ciporitnop In Portland. Cor raftpondene solicited. For caialuiiutrs address J. W. HILL, M. P. O. drawer 17, Portland, Or. Great Risk. "De pufson dat goes froo life actin' bahd to please," said Uncle Eben, "runs do riesk o' habin' folks take him at his word and quit tryin." Sorry fit Lied. De Garry You are the only woman I ever loved. Madge In that case I can't be your summer girl. I don't waflt any am ateur. Women Who Keep Lighthouse. There are a considerable number of women who are In the government ser vice as keepers of lighthouses, both on the seashore and at various stations pnitnil (tta vraa t lakes. Some offja 1 these women have W' displayed remark able courage tin der trying circum stances, and there ts not one ot them whoas not suent sleepless nights la :-, wu.ua. seeing Unit the light which hi a rtldla( tar for mariners Is kept burainf, a .kii r arlvt-a liTnmtaBoei. Tae Woman- who has sefvetHHfie louasit tlsa in charge of a,llgUUioue m yra. uanitu William, keeper of tie light to Uttto Traverse Harbor on Lake Michigan. She Orst went into tut eerTlce la ltm In which year her husband waa given charge of a light on an Is'.and In the lake. Less than three years later he was drowned while attempting to rea cue a party of shipwrecked sailors. Then his widow was appointed In hbt place. For fifteen years she served faithfully, several times winning the special approbation of the government Then she was transferred to the main land, where she has been In charge of the same light for sixteen year. Bat Mrs. Williams Is only one of more than a score of women who serve the govern ment in lighthouses, and there Is not on record an Instance where a woman hs failed In her trust More faithful servants no nation ever bad In arduous uositlons. Summer Resolution!, TAKE TUB Kcoloy Curo Cure rebel fiom liquor, opium and tobaooo habits. 8n4 lor particular to Iieliy Institute. Moved to 40 William A., Iat Side. K. r. Mi Da a 33-1001. w HEX wrltln t advertlMX plMW Ufluuan urn papen THE BOWELS 504 UGGIST3. taste grood. Eat them like candy. They remove any bad taste In the mouth, leav ing the bream sweet ana periumea. it is a pleasure to take them, and they are liked especially Dy children, sweeten the stomach by cleansing tho mouth, throat and food channel. That means, they stop undigested food from souring In the stomach, prevent gas form ing In the bowels, and kill disease germs of any kind that breed and feed In the en tire system. are purely vegetable and contain no mer curial or other mineral poison. They con sist of the latest discoveries In medicine, and form a combination of remedies un equaled to make the blood pure and rich and make clean skin and beautiful 00m plexlon. tone the stomach and bowels and stir up the lasy liver. They do not merely soften the stools and cause their discharge, but strengthen the bowels and put them Into lively, healthy condition, making their ac tion natural. never grip nor gripe. They act qulefly, pos uiveiy ana never cause any kind of uncom- fortable (eellng. Taken regularly they make the liver act regularly and naturally ss It hould. They keep the sewerage of the body properly moving and keep the system clean. Increase the flow of milk In nursing moth ers. If the mother eats a tablet, it make her milk mildly purgative and has a mild but certain effect on the baby. In this way they are the only safe laxatlv lor the nurBtng Infant. taken patiently, persistently, will core sny form of constipation, no matter how old or how often other remedies have fafled. They are absolutely guaranteed to cure any case, or purchase money will be cheerrtilly re funded, cost lOo, 25c, 60c a box. Samples sent free for the asking. We publish no testimonials) but sell Cascarets on their merit under ab solute guarantee to cure. Buy snd try box to-day, or writs us for fre aamyle and booklet. atdma muis rasoT co., cmuoe er m inr. can eonvici. tu 1 ' li ., s. a Tv.aV