La Grande evening observer., May 19, 1914, Image 4

Ipagk four.
LA GRANDE EVENING OBSERVER
" TUESDAY, MAY 19, 1914.
THE OBSERVER
BRUCE DENNIS, Editor and Owner.
Entered in the Post Office at La
. Grande, Oregon, as second class
matter.
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.copy for display advertising must
, reach the office the day before the
ad appears.
Address all communications to
THE OBSERVER, 1710 Sixth Street.
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vance $4.00
Weekly Observer-Star, per year
in advance $1.50
NAMES DONT HURT.
Huerta started calling the Amer
icans "Yankees" some time ago, and
!. now urging his people to use the
same term when referring to people
of the United States. It is popularly
supposed in Mexico that "Yankee" is
a term which implies an insult, in
other words, an uncomplimentary
term. The Mexicans seem to have
an idea that they can scare our
soldiers away by a rapid-fire fusil
lade of the word "Yankee."
It might be that certain old
fashioned southern statesmen who
lived in Civil War times might be
slightly offended if called "Yankees,"
but they are likely to fight all the
harder for being called that, so Mr.
Huerta gains nothing by hurling the
word at us. As for the people north
of the Mason and Dixon line, they
are generally pleased to be called
"Yankees."! One of the dictionary
meanings of the word is "excellent,
or first rate." People used to speak
ot "Yankee good horse" or "Yankee
fine cider." Oliver Wendell Holmes
put the word on a proud basis when
he spoke of "The universal Yankee
nation."
New Englanders are so proud of
this title that they become very
much disturbed when other Amer
icans ore called "Yankees." They
nssume that the ,term is their special
designation. However, the process
of expansion has carried it all over
the country, and to be a "Yankee" is
to be some pumpkins. Huerta can
not hurt our feelings by calling us
by that term. It is really a com
pliment. A PLEA FOR THE AUTHOR.
Tho government has decided V, per
mit the transmission of books by
parcel post, which will decrease the
cost of books to the consumer.
Several states are taking advantage
of this innovation by sending official
volumes to persons who should have
. a chance to rend them. It is a
simple plun which will greatly in
crease the usefulness of state publi
cation departments.
But now that something has been
done for the renders of books, it is
suggested by nn eastern paper that
something also be done for the poor
down-trodden authors who spend
their lives writing thorn. The author
it! required to send his manuscripts
by mail, first class, and to enclose for
the return of the manuscripts tho
same way. If he doesn't enclose the
stamps, the manuscripts lo not re
turn. Of course, if the manuscript
is an extremely heavy one, he sends
K by express, which is a saving over
the usual mail rate.
A manuscript usually takes '20 or
30 trips back and forth before it is
accepted by someone and published.
The amount of postage paid by
struggling authors in this country
must reach into the millions. ., Why
not open the parcel post to manu
scripts as well as to the finished
book, and give the tired and strug
gling literary genius a chance?
By all means give the railroads
the five per cent increase in freight
rates. When the arteries through
which the blood of commerce flows,
get to crumbling look' out for the
irhole structure. And it is very ap
parent the arteries are in not too
healthy a condition.
Anyway, Lafferty suffered defeat
at the hands of Pat McArthur, which
is a direct compliment to the pri
mary election this year and a further
compliment to the people of Multno
mah county.
President Wilson not only went to
a circus in Washington but remained
for the concert. Any man who will
stay for a circus concert is no match
for a crafty old strategist like
Huerta. ,
Dr. Smith and Dr. Withycombe, or
Dr. Withycombe snd Dr. ST'iith It is
plain that everyone realized some
thing wa3 wrong in Oregon and that
the state needs a doctor.
The Pennsylvania man who named
his new son Woodrow Huerta may
have begun his celebration with
grape juice, but evidently didn't
finish that way.
By rotating names a few more
times on the ballot, election returns
would have been delayed until the
middle of the week following.
Now election is over, pay a little
attention to the Orion Stocl; show,
for this year it is to be the biggest
thing ever pulled off of the kind.
If general conditions were not so
serious we should like to know what
mem'ber of the cabinet poses for the
other Wilson girl.
If General Funston gets his
00,000 additional men it is going to
severely test the transport and mov
ing picture facilities.
We assume that in handling the
troops "every little movement has a
meaning of its own."
Bill' Terrible Condition.
There was only a thin partition be
tween the bar parlor and the taproom
of tho RUlmrbnii hostelry, writes "II."
In the Manchester fiunrdian. so that I
could nut help hearing what was per
haps a confidence about a certain Bill's
terrible condition the previous after
noon "Well to rut n long story
short." said tho voice, which was
husky, probably with emotion. "I had
to si t 'ini on a doorstep and leave Mm
there. K must 'a' fell asleep, ami Ms
'at dropped on to I' footpath, nu',
would yor hell " e It. when "e woke tip
there was 1 1 pence in it."
Bark of the Dog.
Wild doj: do not bark that Is to
say. the explosive sound so familiar to
us In tiie "bark" of our dogs is never
heard from any species of wild (log.
Wild dogs grout, Miarl. howl, but they
never give a real bark. The true bark
of tin domesticated dog Is the result
of hi- nig assoclai.no with man and
of hi :i; tempt to "speak" In answer to
his m.f ier's voice New York Ameri
can. Locating a Quarrel.
"And when you were abrond on your
linnevm ion trip did you visit the pal
nee of peace at The Hague?" nsUed the
girl f lend of !H" hivlo just home from
abroad
"Oh. yes.' was the reply. "We hart
rmr first tpinrrel there." Youkerf
Statesman.
How It Worked.
Madj:"-1 lave you really found that
nbsence makes (he heart grow fonder?
Marjorie -lnili-d I have: Since Char
He went away I've learned to love.J"rk
ever so much more.- Mpplucott's.
Sarcastic Retort.
Waiter--Were you ringing tho bell
sir? Customer oifter long wnlti-Iting
Ing It: Orcnt Scott, no: I was tolling
It t thought yon were dead!"-livery
body'
Hardship net nn unmixed evil li
Is the native sulj of manhood Hud
reliance. John Nenl.
Except for the fools the wise guys
would starve.
Never tell a woman you're unworthy
of her; she known It.
Only a fool would trnde all his val
uables for a watchdog.
We never take a man's word i'or the
deed in a real estate transaction. , (
, Perhaps It is better to take chances
as they come than to take chances. .
The world goes around, but many a
man feels that be doesn't get bis share.
There Is nothing new under the sun
except tomorrow, and that never comes.
A failure of ,$0,000,000 gives farther
evidence of the modernization of Ber
lin. The man who has no secrets from
his wife has either no secrets or no
wife. 1
Talk is cheap, which may explain
why we are given so much gratuitous
advice.
Some people are satisfied to take
what they can get. and others get whut
they can tnkfe.
Numerous morals being drawn from i
modern plays may explain why so few j
are left In ni. i
An original person Is one who does
tho sort of thlugs you've always want
ed to do, but never dared.
A copy of Keats' poems recently
brought $7,000, but a lot of living
poets can't give theirs away.
Already man. proud mnn. is running
to cover. . A new transatlantic liner
has special bachelors' quarters.
It Is said that "fresh" eggs are
known td be fresh because tbey have
been tested under the Incubator.
A Savannah man climbed a tree to
propose to his girl. After she marries
him he'll soon come down to earth.
' Intuition Is the faculty by virtue of
which a woman can understand her
husband without listening to what be
says.
The New York police must now lenrn
to swim. -Perhaps this is to lit them
In their struggles with the submerged
tenth. - "
Occasionally n woman Is so contrary
t!:;:t she will not tall III lore until she
li-ti .n eis thai the fellow isn't worthy
ot her.
A le Hirer may be right about the
deb; ..i c to ancient Greece, but
It s Iiimi- gradually collected at 5 cents
a sinnc.
What a liiotv to I'arlshms will be the
l.i'SL' f.mt v I relics telegraphy tower at
I'.ni.-scl.v. it iois the Kiftei structure
by 1W) feet. -
Some liars are not satisfied when
they get hold of a. good story that 18
true. Tlicj want In tinker with it un
til they spoil it.
No one who knows New York be
lieves the two course dinner Idea re
cently introduced from Paris will evei
beioine popular.
The Trench jeer at the new style ot
green hair, lint we should have thought
that lli.it dear alisitithe hue would
make a popular lot.
"Don't pick a husband until you've
had a hundred chances." says a New
York girl, lint few girls will care to
take that many chances.
A group or spots .Vi.i.hjo miles long
has been discovered on the face of the
sun. i:iileiitly (i d Sol neglected tho
precaution of getting vaccinated. i
r.coii.itoy is relative. It Is as dull-'
cull lor some to give up an extra
limousine as it is for oilier men to1i,'ny ;
themselves another egg for breakfast.
Cicruumy has the champion father
married twice, thirty-live children.)
tweuty.vK living; utliclicii hoys, seven
glrl Must be the original paterfami
lias The federal authorities have instruct-';
ed the income tax I'olloctors to be at'
all times polite Train robbers f re-;
pienl!y are. hut It does not lessen the
victim's pain
An Eiigik.il ad' ocate of peace says it
would take JT.dl'b.tuX) Japanese soldiers
fifty yeai-s to subdue the American poo-,
pie. lie should have added, "and then
they wouldn't "
Put if Mr. Asiiiilh were tho shrewd
po.itlclau his supporters think It i in '
w. utd he not. Instead of taking it him
se !'. have handed over that war score-'
la- ishlp to Mrs I'ankhurst?
( wBrajamlE'iltornJtml
Ti Correct Ctotliaji
1 .W YOK
We invite your inspection of our modern Clothing Department and
court comparison of our prices and quality. We both loose if you don't come
in and see us before ycu buy a new suit or any article of men's wear
Look over this list of Men's Furnishings carried in our stock.
Keiser Neckwear
50c to $1.50
J. B. Stetson Hats
$4.00 and $5.00
Arrow Collars.
15c 2 for 25c.
Gordon Straws
and Panamas. Just
Received.
Turn and Turn About.
It was sometimes the custom of pro
lessors In former times to give free
tickets for their courses n kindness
that was sometimes abused. In "The
Book of Edinburgh Anecdotes"' Francis
Watt tells how tin. famous Dr. John
I Barclay, extramural lecturer on anat
omy at the University of Edinburgh
between 1THT and IS-J5. once applied
n humorous corrective to an imposition
of tills kind.
I lie received a note from Dr. I.alng
the well known antiipiary. requesting
i free ticket for a young medical stu
dent, lion-lay professed himself de
lighted to confer the favor, but invited
the pupil to accompany him to Dr.
Laing's bookshop, where he selected
books on anatomy to the exact value of
a ticket for his course of lectures
Then, sagely remarking that without
' textbooks his Icciiircs were useless, he
presented the books to the astonished
youth as a girt from Dr. I.aing. lie
would not listen to the young man's
expostulation, but bundled him and the
books out or the shop. He did not tiud
it necessary to repent the lesson.
Our Poisonous Snakes,
liaymond I.. Dilmars, curator of rep
tiles at the New York zoological park,
classified the poisonous snakes of the
I." lilted States in seventeen species. Of
these, the common coral snake and the
Sonurnn coral snake Inhabit the soutn
eastern ami southwestern states re
spectlveiy : the copperhead and the
water moccasin are in the east and
southeast: the dwarf rattlesnakes that
is. the inassa.an:;a and the pygmy
Infcst the central ami southeastern re
gions, and the eleven typical rattle
snakes live in the east, the southeast,
the pr.ifrie region and the great south
west. Of these, the southwest, indeed,
holds six-the white, the tiger, the
hi ick tailed. Price's, the green anil
tile hururij. Tln other live are the
timber rattlesnake, the diamond back
of the southeast, the prairie, the Pa
cllie and the Texas. Youth's Complin
ton.
Storm Center.
"'Uneasy lies the head that wears
crown. "
"In a republic It Is the president
private secretary who nciiuires the n
soninia." Kansas City Journal.
Effective Covering.
"When the train bandit was car
tniiil was lie covered with confusion '
"No. sir: with the train crew's ie
Toilers". Italtiinore American.
11- who will not reason is a bigot,
be who cannot is a fool; he who dares
not is a glare - Byron.
The Largest and Best Selected Stock
of Men's Ready-to-Wear in
Eastern Oregon
Every desirable shade and pattern is here -every
popular style of the season and a quality and price to
suit your pocket book. We are sole agents for four of
America's greatest clothing lines, namely:
Benjamin . Washington
"New. York Styles"
$20.00 to $30.00.
Hirsch Wickwire Suits
' 4 America 's Highest
Grade of Ready to Wear."
$25.00 to $35.00.
Eagle Caps '
50 to $1.50
Manhattan Shirts
$1.50 to $3.50
J. E. Tilt Shoes
$4.00 to $6.00
WE HAVE THE CHOICEST
Swift's Premium Hams
and Bacon
THAT ARE SOLD ON MERIT.
Full Line of Fresh Vegetables.
Strawberries : 2 for 25c
Pie Plant 6 lb. for 25c
The City Grocery and
Bakery
E. POLACK, Proprietor.
La Grande
Organized
DESIGNATED DEPOSITORY OF UNITED STATES GOVERN
MENT. UNITED STATES POSTAL SAVINGS DEPOSITORY.
Capital $100,000.00
Surplus $110,000.00
Total Resources $1,000,000.00
For twenty years, in all kinds of financial weather, we have
successfully catered to the monetary wants of the people of La
Grande and the Grand Ronde Val'ey. " ''SS'W
We respectfully solicit your business.
La Grande National Bank
. La Gtande, Oregon
Society Brand Suits
For Young' Men and Men
who stay young.
$20.00 to $27.50.
Fidelity Fifteens.
"The Greatest $15.00 Suit
value. Guaranteed all
Wool."
No more $15.00. no less.
. Gordon Hats
No More $3. No Less
Interwoven Hosiery
25c to 50c Pair.
Connolly Dress Shoes
$3.00 Pair.
New Silk Hats
for Men and Bo37s
50c to $1.25.
National Bank
in 1887.