Oregon daily emerald. (Eugene, Or.) 1920-2012, August 21, 1995, Page 8, Image 24

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    IT’S ALL RELATIVE
Mankato State U. Minnesota
- C»IH it ‘ j . - M X Uv HA i’i \
m. three* h diploma dl
jictl on the umc ijUv tht» *j>nn
, i .if- !m ?..f, ; f i u ‘ho? aum :in
a mi pt-iruimotlvr i al*o t rocscd t
ManLito Suit wtthin hoi
ol C4<h other t«. move their Jr
nuN Dulfi t Simcr Skdgc ung
jUiui ihoc pio
DRINK UR!
U of Florida
( *f < >>• • ,» V ho \N< , .. H i l
*tf I ioruij ha- .4 dunking ptohh
pk t orp wnt V.iuno 4 wnn.i
btidjttons of tin hunv beverage
^orwno fnrhpd -»K0 Sr* oujur
h»u!o t»l uiawlvcih lemonade
hi* favorite Havor mti .i Simmik
**anh I m kind ol addnted to
Srupplc he m\v
TEA TIME, PART 2
U of California, Davis
Ml At,MS *..« SVM-1MI
Mici dcudinj- th, perki dunk ad*
wen i t 4lh let t shu l ( 11
kiudcni Vii; 1 Imn 4mi im hand
llulc. dll idtd In .mkcm,. I In
radio jingle Although the«f
dream ol ftftfivmi* jui uifv of
the beverage wen shattered, the*
did grr i«mt mom \ ami that
s f
PITCHER PERFECT
Ohio U
\ 5 Ml vM l\< \ K }i HI v A i »h |) f a | IttH ** \S<» Hi I K\
^cah; (hai i Oi mj>+K it s j linumrui Ikct^ jh wimh j nnuirc
i )hw» t praduait \ | \\ i»il< thought u» I«*r Kiii vptifif* vitkumen
un phrm^uph* tU« he bnm) up j Beet ( I me,
iVe t 4iu! l i»um Street I Im »'• I hr* 'X i li*oV. on tlk '\ihefu hut
urnc it \ 4
dotumcnurv *4
U* 4* o»Uc£C
^miaiiv \fc <»|ft
vj^n \ ( oUf!
Sintt «.idi
divj'tavcd the
Im'4*K cihihilKHl
111 |tilk Ami the
Isot thing jimui
it t\ ih»* mole
v«hi drink rh*
txlttT il ktokv
Ium kidding
Lilith h (othuntK puiv
a smile tm im tiu . Hum mv>
Hearing the vt>n$; *,m the laJio
that
ON YOUR MARKS
Brigham Young U
SURER-SAFE SEX
U. of Georgia, Athens
ll S A Hmi>' ll s A IMAM' It'v A I'kiM'HV
laun 1 tic new superhero tor uir w students,
t Mm. ippcih tin (.rftiiv.u umputo to
dispense rubhets «t ill soloes. us let ami mio
Rrvehtls Sjsillcti it the l ti( tienrpu t lesbun.
£av 4mi bisexual si udetvt union ' .litatenext week,
in lit I inannetcd Innalhan hisett tinnncxl Im satse
4tni tratiicxi up with hit N I i > lighting partner
Kuhtiri Maul tt> provide protection tut all
I Hi
cxim uui/
vcdmcd approii
nuuh Si?
HngKjttt Young
students to fate
against tht
slink ami
their professor
'students in B>U
I (amen s huu
nets law v law
strapped on
then sneaks at
0 Hi a in to
meet the ptotes
*«i? -* vhaHeng*
If he beat ?A
percent of the
slavs m the rate,
he d give the
whole class an
extra quiz grasle
of 10 I he catch
sxa* that at least
S percent of
the slass had to
sprint out of bed
for the catlv
morning tun
and lose the
rate Although
vome ran from
the opport units.
'H) percent of the
t lavs iluiwcd up
YOU MAY ALREADY
BE A WINNER
U of Tennessee, Knoxville
I \SiMS Hi AVI ks. U
Jim t,rubh. tcall> got into the l d
\L Mahon spun .«* hr dclorird
ment, l >rcano trail* *1** vtifin
true' \X c hear l»rubb v hern hang
trig out at the tiean ' olluc, laugh
mg at all ho fokn
CENTS AND
SENSIBILITY
U. of Florida
Wmoimksaiih.m ii\l
won t but anything havn t been
hanging around the ultimate
penny ptiuhev and tevent l «t
I Utrnia grad jmhuu Smith Ho
tfedinun hobfn of puking |x-ntlio
oft the ground, vavmg ilunge and
revelling dotutiofti bom btriui*
allowed him to pit oil the remain
ing $*h) 01 he owed tor tuition ho
vrniof vear 1 he of hie gravumdv
avicpted the toinv, abet miming
that Smith put Im name S<k.u1
Srvunti number and plume mini
!>ct on caih o! ho I OH roll*
Svr»K*gc NUlhivk would be proud
COMING TO
AMERICA
Florida A&MU.
I it *RU>A A \ M ofCi lAi S SAV
I Ho plan In breed, ..veil and mavtn
dim vev cal ’ the SS.SOO
worth nl South \liiuii boa giUI
vcmrn the school reecnth pur
vhased I he uniNciMtv boiieht the
vt nvrft from the S.HO.OfH) j*«»at
Ihuuk of ihe iarpe flame, mean
nc\s and idiHisicm oioration .»sm»
ruled with the breed ihirr
tjualitie' lacking in North Amen
tan puts I alk about hjhhhhhd
TRASHY GET-URS
Mankato State U . Minnesota
\V Hi > \| i \r ' U) MALI AMIN
\<»u n,»\c rcvstlinp him: Meml»ct\
nl th< wiinid; ntiilii at Mankato
State hosted i iiuii fashion shnse
in April in iiitmiicmnfjir the S t h
aiimvrrvm of farth l ),n l*antvi
pam emitted then had. plastn
chvinmmcntallv unfriendi* selves
vs»1 lit ennccs o, plained the res vvla
r>iJ11v o! thru outfit* ( hvt student
tarried an umhiclla made of 1 J
■
patbage hap pants Hut firxt pn/c in
oui bcHik pies m tin student who
ehraper. but that the mIioo! will
honor trie of} sumpus s uni .it one
it*, atton
GET
DEGREES
Broward Community
College, Fla.
M\m I i>u \nv W Sum -a v
' hip i >avnl l ettcfiiian fan When
Si i e diet! in Muri.b. he left Itrhtnd
S * S million t«* Ik- used only lor
st holurships to ( students,much
hkc u smaller pitt the pup toothed
iomii endowed to his ulnu nutcr.
Hull State l I he state ol I lorulu
might later add («> tin I on I aud
crdule businessman s contribution
ami raise the total to $S S million
1 he beipjcM. the largest in the
school s histi>ts. soukl benefit a1*
mum as 2S|) us crape |»k's and
liKttes cueh year
GOLDFINGER
U of Houston
!*•< \HH\\ Ml HI U. \ I I\i,} K
worth S HO.(MX) 1 hut s the
amount sin accepted to drop a
lawsuit summing from ati incident
at a IO*H [ of Houston Irutcfmis
parts I lubct .« foimet l oi
I iotiMon s!tuient vuid she hist her
right ptnktt fingertip attemptinp to
break up a hpbt between her
bovfnetu! and Stephen Jaek I erro
funnel Uupii-r piOKlrm ..I (hr
Slpiliu Mpha I psilon Oatemitv
I erfo said he hit the impel in self
. MM
II Minis j
ALTER
NATIVE
EATING?
U ol Massa
chusetts.
Amherst
MUiklU^ v* I(h
calrtcfta blues
can take then
business else
jlumiu have ere {
atrd the l >!t
i ampus Meal
l*lan. whit.h rnti
ties student* to as
mu* h as a 1 ^
percent tlmouni
at 10 area rcstau
rants Ami it the*
get a hankering
tor deep tried
mvstcrv meat,
students tan
a!wavs go bask to
l he/ Amherst
Richard \
Rossi. Amherst's
dire* tor of tood
scrs»t.cs savs the
university meal
plan is actually
HEY, THESE AREN T
MY SIZE
Cedarville College, Ohio
A tOKMHi t HiARVfUJ liottli.t S Jit N I
has Keen sentenced to probation tor Mriiiins
~s paif% oI panties. three bra* and three dtps
Hamel Mcedef. JV admitted pilfering the
' {f * '• >: > **• ' ■ t i i r i . .1
dips from a UkuI l aundronut I he under gar
menu began disappearing last \cjr and were
iatcr found in Meedcr s apartment I hc prnul
«fu: fudge alvo ordered Meedcr to undergo
counseling and pas >1 •* in restitution. Sounds
like he got oft cxs\