COMMENTARY
Ivory tower or just day care? Lost in intelligentsia
"This institution will be
hosed on the illimitable free
dom of the human mind For
we ore not afraid to follow truth
wherever it may lead nor toler
ate error so long as reason is
left free to combat it."
— Thomas Jefferson
Posted above EMU Fir Room
By Owen Brennan Rounds
ast week was the annua)
Meeting of the Minds, and
I didn't receive an invita
tion. Having recently recovered
from losing my mind at Guido's,
I realized my input to this meet
ing would be important. I
harassed my drinking buddy to
RSVP for me, and he did.
The meeting was basically a
free dinner for "student leaders"
and administration folks, paid
for with your tuition (thank you.
by the way). The usual suspects
were there and after dinner the
group adjourned to a round
table discussion in the EMU Fir
Room. That is where the fun
began.
A representative from the phi
losophy department began with
the acute observation that the
state of Oregon doesn't really
give a damn about higher educa
tion, so it's time we start looking
out for ourselves.
He outlined a plan that would
call for increased tuition and
increased enrollment: more peo
ple paying more money would
help offset Measure 5 budget
cuts. What he said next made
even more sense.
He discussed the creation of a
surcharge. This surcharge, about
$40 a term, would stay on cam
pus and help create freshman
programs and senior research or
practicum programs. These new
program* would encourage stu
dent* to stay at the University
instead of transferring or drop
ping out
The gentleman said this is a
crucial step for the University,
stating increased program cuts
would essentially create a
downward spiral toward obliv
ion. He also hinted at the fait
that our tuition goes into a big
pot at the Oregon State Board of
Higher Education. and when it
gets doled back out. we don't get
as much money as we put in. A
$40 per-student. per term sur
charge that gets spent on this
campus could help keep stu
dents at the University.
With all this intellectual dis
cussion about the future of the
University, I actually believed
there might be hope for us in the
near future — that dream was
immediately shot down by rep
resentatives of various victims'
clubs.
Eve, a pleasant and articulate
young lady, began discussing
how she and her friends were
disempowered on this campus.
Imagine that, disempowered stu
dent leaders, what a wet dream
for administrators,
She cried out because there
weren't enough books in the
library sympathetic to hor
plight. She added that 20 of her
friends had left the University
because they felt they didn't fit
in.
One insightful gentleman
asked her how she felt about her
relationships with her profes
sors.
"As an African-American les
bian with one leg and silly glass
es, how can 1 expect you. a
straight (looking) white male to
understand my existence.” she
hurst out
I spent too much time scrib
bling m mv notebook and she
caught me when I rolled my
eves at this insane statement
"l don't agree with you at all."
I said. "If only straight white
males could understand straight
white males. African-American
lesbians with one leg and sill\
glasses understand African
American lesbians with one leg
and silly glasses, and so on ad
insomnia, the world would lie a
really strange place "
At this point I hesitated. I
wanted to point out that at least
one historic lender would agree
completely with her point of
view, but any time you mention
Hitler in an argument people
tend to forget what they were
discussing and begin calling
each other names
Instead I stated that the goals
of any university were to create
better problem solvers and bel
ter communicators. If the
administration pandered to the
pleas of every bitch-and-moan
artist, it would have a day care,
not a university.
"The University is in the mid
dle of a little budgetary problem
and if it tries to appease every
non-traditional student on cam
pus. there won't be a university
for any students." I said.
Tito, chairman of the Mariachi
Band support group, rang in
with his point of view
"My people may be in the
minority, but soon we will
become the majority and white
people will be the minority. If
you don't recognize the impor
tance of my people and our his
tory now, we will take out our
anger and self-hatred upon you
when we are the majority." Tito
If the administration pandered to the
pleas of every bdcheml-moan artist, it
would have a day care, not a university.
decreed.
I don't know if I was off-base,
but 1 interpreted that statement
us a threat Ilf dec lured that wf
must legitimize Mariai In lMinds
within academia nr suffi'r thf
slings and arrow s of assault gin
tars whim thi>v rule thf top 40
Cowering to such a threat wmdd
hi! a disgrace to this Uiiivorsitv
- look for thf Mariachi minor
in nf st fall s m httdulf of i lasses
An administrntivo vice presi
dent of something chose to
speak up
"1 think we are all in agree
ment that wo all agree that
something needs to be done.” ho
said thoughtfully
"You're dead wrong, pal." my
drinking buddy interjected. "We
don't agree about anything on
tins campus; most of us couldn't
give a shit less."
"No You're wrong buddy.”
chimed in little Timmy Doolittle
of the victims' support network
"We are victims, hear us roar."
he belted out. and then demand
ed the University create special
classes for victims' studies.
I asked him if he felt victim
ized by his own last name.
Doolittle began to cry.
This campus's student leaders
are fighting to be recognized as
victims and they want the Uni
versity to take care of them
Well, they're in for a surprise,
the University can't.
This institution managed to
find hundreds of thousands of
LETTERS
Trillions
The following shows whal
could have been purchased with
the $3 trillion spent from 1981
to 1992 on the military:
• $20 billion could've funded
40,000 drug enforcement offi
cials at $50,000 a year for 10
years.
• $40 billion could've built
800 new $50 million hospitals
and medical research centers
around the country.
• $40 billion could've provid
ed sufficient help for the 1992
hurricanes, the 1993 Midwest
floods, and several other disas
ters.
• $100 billion could've signif
icantly reduced cancer, heart
disease, AIDS, and many other
medical problems.
• $200 billion could've built
four million $50,000 tractors to
improve agriculture and life in
third-world countries.
• Kit linn r miM’vo built
four million $50,000 houses for
homeless and poor Americans.
• $300 billion could've elimi
nated the 1002 national deficit,
thereby reducing taxes for every
one in the country.
• $500 billion could've fund
ed two million school and many
other needed public service jobs
at $25,000 a year for 10 years.
• $1.5 trillion could've been
used to double all of the above,
abolish most taxes, of for other
miscellaneous expenses. A tiny
fraction of the miscellaneous
expenses would include nation
al defense, as the 192 warheads
on one essentially invulnerable
U.S. submarine ran destroy any
country on earth.
From 1993 to 1990. the Clin
ton administration proposes to
spend an additional $1 trillion
on defense spending, despite the
end of the Cold War. This is
only an 8 percent decrease in
defense spending beyond that
proposed nv the Bush adminis
t ration.
Mary Olsen
Las Vegas
Hypocrisy
The attention of the media is
totally focused on Bosnia How
ever. there are events that have
occurred and are occurring in
the southern part of Africa that
are every bit as bad. if not worse,
than those occurring in Bosnia
The death toll in Angola and
Mozambique is estimated at
between one and two million
people — much greater than the
death toll in Bosnia. There has
been torture, mutilations and
gross human rights violations in
both countries. Why. then, don't
we see heart-rending scenes on
TV every night from Angola or
Mozambique as we do from
Bosnia?
Is it because these people are
black? Is it because the U.S. gov
ernment and the CIA played a
major role in the carnage anil
destruction in both countries?
The United Stales financed
Jonas Savimbi in his attempt to
overthrow the socialist govern
ment in Angola. Jonas Savimbi
recently lost a U N -supervised
election in Angola that the U.N.
said was fair. Jonas Savimbi
refused to accept the results of
the election and is continuing
the war and destruction.
Suppose a leftist guerrilla
leader lost an election and
refused to accept the result. The
United States would intervene
in a minute — not. however, if it
is a right-winger like Savimbi.
So much for the oft-stated
belief that the United States
intervenes in foreign countries
to preserve democracy and free
dom. The United Stales inter
venes to establish fascist govern
ments that will allow
multinational corporations to
exploit the cheap labor and nat
ural resources.
Oary Sodborough
Bet (flower, Calif.
dollars utn essarv to fund multi
pie m it 11 it :ulturalist agendas,
and it is now suffering the con
sequences There ar»* studi'iits in
ma 11 \ courses who ■ ant write 11
complete sentence or complete 11
siinplii nlgebran equation Ask
your professors how the I hiivor
sit\ is doing ill respet t to te.n h
mg communication and prob
lem solving and they will tell
von emu tlv what kind of i nsis
this University is really in
The administration had the
sense to realize that the state
will no longer bankroll the Uni
versity It looks like the admin
istration also has the intestinal
fortitude to raise its head and
tiegin taking care of itself instead
of expecting the system to take
rare of it
It is probably too much to
expe< t a victim-bound student
body to do the some. As I
walked out of the Fir Room I
looked up — Jefferson's quote
was still there
Owen Brennan Rounds is
publisher of the Oregon Coin
men to tor
GMAT
1 \ j'l ft U K Ilk! '
lYutuiunt l i.nur>
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November 21
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if a gay, lesbian, or
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