Idiosyncratic
idolatry at the
Silver Dollar
Fourth in a five-part club review series, this review is done in
poor taste to reflect the undeniably lucrative strip club
industry with seven such bars thriving in the Eugene area.
- - oomimf **t*a
10,000 Maniacs (above) join the Altman Brothers Band, Phlsh and
others for a Memorial Day weekend concert at Laguna Secs.
10,000 Maniacs and others to perform
at California wilderness recreation area
Laguna Seca Daze, n Momoriol Day weekend musical extrava
ganza. will foature some of the hot lust party hand* on the road
this summer. Musical offerings Saturday. May 29. include The
Allman Brothers Band. Blush. Blue* Traveler. Shawn Colvin and
The Jeff Healey Bund. Featured the following day will be 10.000
Maniacs. Blues Traveler, Blush and The Samples.
A Bill Graham Presents show, it will bo held at the laguna Seca
Recreation Area on Highway OH between Monterey and Salinas.
Thu music starts each day at 11 a m and goes till its over. There
will also be art displays, crafts booths, ethnic foods and other sur
prises throughout, including a late night camp fire each night.
Laguna Seca. in Monterey. Calif. has camping accomodations,
some available at a reduced rate.
For additional concert information, call the festival hotline at
415-tl74-B72(>. Tickets are now on sale at oil BASS Ticket Centers,
or call 209-952-BASS to charge by phone.
D. Lee Williams
/ tx (!»> £Xvv t'-xx.-i*,:
Its five to 11 Wednesday night lit the Silver Dollar
liar and I've run out of dollar bills The old guy I work
with says,"No problem, slides me five ones, slides
his Mercedes key ring over in front of me, and the
blond girl on stage who looks like either the blond
from Physics ( lass or an old History GTF disses three
baseltall-cappers on the other side of the small stage
and slides over to our side.
The blond — topless, not yet bottomless — grinds
around on the bar. moves in front of me. drops the
blue (.-string bottom, and I lay one of my friend's dol
lars on the stage as a barmaid — behind us — switch
es empty Buds for full ones, takes the other four
bucks, taps my friend's shoulder, leans into his ear.
smiles big and says low, "Now you know you sold
that old Mercedes diesel lieast three months ago."
Louder — over George Thorogood — the l)J
announces either a birthday or "l-just-got-outta jail"
dance, and all the darners — three on the floor, four
out of nowhere — grind their stars 'n' stripes span
dexed. three-inch red pumped. Guess-joan cut-off
selves to center stage
Red pumps girl grabs a chair and sticks it dead cen
ter. Guess girl grabs a guv in black Keeboks. black
cowbov hot — birthday dude. And American Flag
spandex girl gives the guy harsh eye-contact, while
slowly, and with a smile, uncoiling a raspy and well
used coil of rope.
The Silver Dollar is the best strip club in town.
Newlv reopened and remodeled, it stands in the ashes
of the former Mustang Ranch, behind Bliss' Steak
Ranch at 2H<)1 W. 11th Ave.
The parking lot remains the same — trucks and
Trans Ams — but inside is refurnished, redone like a
Hugh Hefnerian. grand-Guccione playroom. Mirrors
deck the walls from floor to ceiling, gloriously and
strategically reflecting every inch of everything. Walls
are outlined by a red stream of flickering lights and
stage-conscious red floodlights. There's a black and
chrome D| booth ripped right out of The Love Boat
lounge
But there are three interior advantages here that set
Silver Dollar above all the other strip joints in town:
three stages, a nifty shower section and no TVs
Three high circular stages are set in the main area
with the lurgest placed center. And this is good, for
center stage contains the majority of the action. This
layout especially bests (Kith jiggles (totally nude dam -
mg onlv a few, select times of the week) and ABC,
where strippers perform just below ground, in a
sunken-runway which follows more closely the
design of a pig's feuding trough than a true stage Sil
ver Dollar recognizes that women should Iw elevated
to their natural sexual dominance.
Just behind the smaller, right-flanking stage stands a
newly installed glass-shower stall and hot-tub. Closet
voyeurs are free to observe the women after their |>er
formnnoes as they shower head-to-toe and all tattoos
in between.
The added plumbing work here is an astute design
feature connecting eros and earth: Each wntershow
taps into fundamental female control of all elements
Here in the hot tub, supple mother nature holds court
for gawking, elementally impotent men
The bar also has no TVs And this is very, very
good TVs are a strip joint's most annoying distrac
tion. TVs are for sports bars. The Silver Dollar bans
TV and cleverly keeps its pool table and poker
machines in a separate gaming space. Integrating these
toys into the strip area would only create intrusive
distractions, as is the case with both Houlahan's and
ABC. where beside-the-stage l-otto machines steal pre
cious attention from the performers.
There should be no distractions when one is dis
covering the eternal enigmas inherent in the female
form. Consider the absurdity of sticking a Pac-Man
machine on the bridge of the Starship Enterprise.
And then there are the women. At Silver Dollar, the
0««.9
The Silver
Dollar on W.
11th Avenue
teas recently
remodeled
Indoors.
performers are incredibly good In the ranking of strip
pers. I plat v those .it Silvt-r Dollar a In stithy first, w ith
the remaining pint ed in dost ending order of desi end
ing skill and appearam e: ABC. (iggles and. finally.
Houlahan's, whom the women look meatless and
amphetimized.
At Silver Dollar. look for Barcelona-worthy gymnas
tics. Madonna-worthy grinds and unoxpe* tod talents
(During tho stage dam e for birthday dude, a gidil (.
stringed performer was somehow able to hold, light
and twirl a match in each aeriola. pint lung them out
to loud applause and lots of dollars )
Ignore all tattoos and any bruises
Of male and female strippers, females are more
interesting Women bold mystery — the haw element
of erolii ism — while male genitalia is like graffiti on a
white wall.
Never tip a male stripper He holds not a penny's
worth of secrets Tip the female stripper often and
well, for she holds the secret of life
The Silver Dollar, then, is less a more slrip joint and
more like a keyhole into a vast pyramid or a telescope
aimed eagerly toward the heavens
Prices for table dances are the industry average $?>
topless. $10 bottomless Of course, this amount is pit
tance to pay for priceless sublime submission to
supreme uterine power.
HEAT
Continued from Page 5
cowboy, nfter nil
Opening the show is Ux.nl g<xxl ole hoys The
(.unrdiaus of Ameni an Mnruhtv (onceived as
a one-shot Cow-Helle sexploitation rip-off. the
Cuardiuns quickly fell into the hands of an
unscrupulous "promoter" who turned them out
On tin* hard streets of Kugene to open for the
ugliest acts in town
Sleepwalking through one-night stands in the
unspeakable dives of Eugene's tough Campus
District, the Guardians became one of the lead*
mu exponents of the 13th Avenue sound Past
masters of the classic technique* of Seventies
Koc k. the Guardians took a musical lire iron
to t sVV and bashed off all the parts they didn’t
know how to play. To the drunken throngs
squandering their parent's money in 13th
Avenue's beer hells, it sounded "just like the
record!"
As their reputation spread, their outlook
matured The Guardians’ first EP, Cod's Conn
try, explored the closely-linked themes of seek
ing, awakening and spiritual rebirth, exemplified
by the horse-whipped Beat h Boy back-up vocals
on ''Polaroid Spread Shots" and the quiet assur
ance of"Rope 'n' Ride." with its repeated affir
mation, "Ciot my six-pack by my side." The band
had arrived and they knew it
The next couple of years were bin ones for the
Guardians, as they became the opening band of
choice for hard-driving cult idols like Dash
Kiprock and the Beat Farmers At present. the
tiand is concentrating on a busy club schedule
and polishing their music, which they hastily
point out has never linen described as "an ecle*
tic lilend of folk and uriwin cultural influences."
Both bands play at Good Times Thursday.
May 27. at 9:30 p m. Admission is $H
REVIEW
Continued from Page 5
“The eagle’s getting tired/The bear cannot flap
his wings/People running scared/As the little
girl slngs/What goes up/Surely must come
down/Don't keep your head in the (pound."
Humans' relationship to nature continues
on "Is It Like Today?," a song in which
Wollinger sounds remarkably like Neil Young.
The record's second track traces man's evolu
tion and ends with people on the moon trying
to solve the planet's problems.
The message is made ever so clear on the
12-word lyrics of "And God Said": "And God
said. Look after the planet.' But man said.
Fuck you.’ "
Although the album docs have a darkly con
sistent theme, there are many departures from
the "retro" sound, “What is Love All About.”
the record's third track, sounds more suited
for Michael Jackson than the thin, bespecta
cled singer of World Party.
"Give it All Away” and “Radio Days”
embody chaos and confusion and are too
"unstructured" to neatly fit the retro-folk clas
sification.
“Radio Days" has a swirling guitar style
with a solid rap beat, creating a surrealistic,
sound. The lyrics contribute to the confusion,
literally: “I don't know why. don't know
when/Don't know how. don't know
who/Don't know where, don't know what,
don’t know whlch/Don't know why." In the
contest of the music, those lyrics add up to
more thnn their literal value.
The University Theatre presents
kmg tsar. William Shakespeare's powerful play of betray
a I. evil, love and redemption King bear is so < orrupted by
power and pride that he is unable to distinguish love from flat
jury until lie is tot raved by his own daughters Often tailed
the world's greatest play king Imr is a masterful blending of
pageantry , battles storms and epn poetry
The University I heat re produi lion is direi ted by Robert
Barton, department head of the University theater arts at t
ing program ( mu .lotting the lUO.: ‘it Main Stage Season
the play opens May 1 and runs through June ri Tit kets. Sit
general and St ill stmleuts. are as ailable at the University The
at re box ntfir t> in Vi I lard Hall ( til I4t> 4 1 ‘H for more mlor
ination
The Very Little Theatre, Inc. presents
,S.on f/imt; ' .1 imiMi .il mv-l'Tv writtim lit )<«11»«<s
Mi Iionuld, I )<n til Vos .mil Kiilwirl l •orliit h I his /an\. s.ilin
i al poke at Agatha l hristie's mvslnrius and miisii al stv los of
past ynars is ilin>i l*'il In Molina Noal. with inusii al dirot •
lion by 1.vdia l.urd, i homogruphy by Kathy Thorne and i os
lumas in Barbara w i I llama Hi it w« k\ spool opens Friday.
May _'t .ind c out mutts through limit 1.1 at Hie Vitrv Little I he
atn». 2'I50 Milyard St Showtime is H lr»-p in and tit lots am
SH for lliti general public f or rcserv atmns i all t-t-t r?'jl
Actors Cabaret of Eugene presents
Ij'iul Mr (I irnitr, ken Ludwig's delightful farte ultout the
gala season-opening lienelit ol the Cleveland (.ram) Opera
( ompanv as they wait nine lh«t world-famous tenor Tito Morel
li (also known as II Stupendo). who has been invited to par
form his greatest role 111 hopes of putting Cleveland on the
operatii map Unfortunately, all does not go well for the detl
11 ated troupe as one hilarious mishap alter another threaten
opening night To top it off. the great II Stupendo appears to
have over dosed on tranquilizers A sensation on Broadway
and in London's West laid, l-rml Mr 11 trnor is guaranteed
to leave audient.es tears eyed with laughter
The play vv ill lie jierforuied weekends at H p m through June
I') at The Downtown Cabaret. ‘»'M> Willamette St Fit kets are
available at all Unit ('.enter Outlets (tiH?-5000) or t an fie
reserved by t ailing At tors Cuharet at titLI-43f>H Sti Student
Kush tit.kets are at the door one hour prior to the show, as
available
Comi' lint h. to the r> & Dime. Itmmy Dean, hmmy Dean, n
comic drama ihn! ink.es place in n small town dime store in
West Texas as the Dim iplos of lames Dean gather for their 20th
reunion Now middle-aged women, they were teenagers when
Dean filmed Cianl decades ago in neurhy Marfa One of them,
an extra in the film, has a i hild she claims Dean hel|Nid cun
reive (III the set. this ( hild is the |mimv Dean of the title
Written by id (ira< /\k, this play was i ritically acclaimed
in New York and made into a major motion pic lure starring
filler. Sandy I tennis and Karen Mack I he Ai tors (.aharet pro
duction is directed by |oe /ingo, produced by Jim Kolierts and
features local actors
Held in The Theater Annex at t'l VV Kith Ave . the play runs
through June 1 t Pro show dinner reservations are available
(or Friday and Saturday nights Call ftH.'t -»:tt»H for more infor
mation
July*
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