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vegetables and rice
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‘Cool World’ can’t beat the heat
Cool World
*
PG-13
1992
By Tammy Batey
Emerald Associate Editor
Holll would If she could
and she will, according to ads
for (Um>! World Well, the mov
ie tries (to lx* a good film), hut
it can't, so it bombs
To Ixi a good film, a movie
must include several important
elements Most importantly, a
movie must have good actors
and a good plot. Cool World
fails miserably on both counts.
The male lead of (Uttd World,
Jack Doobs. played by Gabriel
Byrne, is a convicted murderer
(are we supposed to forged
this?), a bumbling idiot und
sexually obsessed with a doo
dle — the voluptuous Holll
Would. Yep, jock Is one
upstanding member of society,
all right
The cartoon Holll. played by
Kim Basinger, spends much of
the film gyrating suggestively
and stroking her body. During
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Jack and Holli'a scene, It’s
hard to toll whether she'* hav
Ing m* with him or with her
self.
Detective Frank Harris,
played by Brad Pitt, is the only
othor human besides Jack to en
ter Cool World. He lusts after a
doodle, but must resist because
his self-appointed job is to
make sure doodles and humans
don't have sex Detective Frank
is u more likable character than
Jack, but ho spends much of the
movie posing ns If he were in a
1940s detective flick.
The plot (I hate even having
to (.nil it that) Is slow, boring
and pointless Jack is a cartoon
ist who creates (or thinks he
does at least) the fictional
"Cool World" —■ Holli's world.
In fact. Jack tells one of his
drawings of the voluptuous
Hoi I i that he wouldn't have
survived prison without her. In
case you haven't guessed. Jack
is one sick puppy.
Through the course of the
movie. Jack is able to live out
his twisted fantasies of sex with
Hoili. This accomplishment is
certainly not due to anything
he does
Holt! Is also obsessed with
the idea ol becoming human
and traveling away from (a«j|
World But the only way for a
cartoon to txrcnmu human is by
having sex with a human. Jack
Is the very willing target of
Holli's lust to be "real.”
But reul Holli is not, even
when she fulfills her dream of
beriming human. Holll is not
only a cartoon character, but
she's also a cartoon caricature
of women, which makes you
wonder what director Ralph
Bakshi thinks of women
When Hoili isn't trying to en
tice Jack Into bed. she's dancing
in Cool World's dance club.
These scenes are some of the
most sextst of the film Hoili
dances alone on the floor while
the men of Cool World circle
around her and ogle.
Hoili is a barbie doll with in
credible and unreasonable pro
portions. Her character is re
duced to an over-sized bosom
and u shapely tush that struts
around in virginal while (iron
ic. huh?) All of the other car
toon women in the movie ure
scantily clad bimbos.
Two non-cartoon women ap
pear in the movie briefly. The
plot of this movie could have
been helped with broader char
acterizations They are the only
likable and realistic characters
in the movie
However, the sexism in this
film goes both ways. Jack is a
bumbling idiot who lives in a
make believe world because
he's afraid of reality. Jack and
the cartoon men in the movie
spend their time (literally)
drooling over Hoili with their
mouths agape and their eyes
bulging like fools
Take it from me. Cool World
is a very uncool place.
MINISTRY
Continued from Page 5
which gave most thrash bands u
run for tho speed-metal glory.
Thu latest album is essential
ly more of tho sumo.
Songs like "Jesus Built my
Hot Rod,” "Psalm 69,” and
“Grace” give the album a de
cidedly religious tone. Alain's
assessment of organized reli
gion seems none too favorable.
But the approach Is fun.
Gibby Haynes, courtesy of
the Butlhoto Surfers, does tho
guest vocals for "Jesus Built my
Hot Rod."
"Psalm 69” sounds like a
good old fashioned religious re
vival fed through a diabolical
effects processor. Tho song
slurts with a gothic funeral
dirge but gives way to speod-of
light guitar work.
“N W O." is an acronym for
President Bush's highly touted
Now World Order. Alain lets
Bush do the talking on this one.
The best song on the album
is "Scarecrow." The sound
seems to bo taken directly from
Led Zeppelin's "When the Lev
ee Breaks,” and Alain even at
tempts to pull off a Robert
Plant-esque wail toward the
end
Where does Ministry go from
here? The bund seems to have
maxed-out on the speed-metal
idea Things can’t get text much
more aggressive than they al
ready are. How about a salute
to reggae?
^SAFERIDEj)*
As of Sunday, July 26th, to better serve our riders,
the on-campus van will not be running. Instead we
will have 2 vans on an on-call basis.
o Callto reserve a FREE
*i»ta ^on^camPus ow’H/ioy
9 Mon-Thurs 9pm-1am • Fri-Sat 9pm-2am
The Co|h| Sleep
Open Mon-Fri 8-7 Sat 10-4
BetmMin Panersun & ferry Rqfl an 13m
485-11253
Celebrate Himlcnlliig With 1$ !
Satardoy on th« Morfctt Stage
ioam Robert Petersen
namTheMcCornacks
t the Garden Variaty Band
Noon Gregory Field
1:30 Blue Heron StrngOuaitel
3pm Eagle Park Slim Band
Local Crwhi • (Wmi Food • li»o EotwWMMM
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