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COMMENT AND OPINION
w ■* Hr
W WMW ColUU* I*— W U* Stm. REFORM BEE 1
BRIAN SHElLfTO. DAliY NEBRASKAN U OF NEBRASKA l sNCOlN
Sometimes you’ve just
got to break the rules
By Allison Glock
■ Indiana Daily Student
Indiana U
This column is addressed to a few of
my new, very special friends You know
who you are. The very special people who
make my life a living hell.
You are the rule-followers
You are the people who are Republican
because your parents are The people
who insist on driving the speed limit
even at two in the morning when no one
else is on the road The people who read
the required chapters before the lecture
The people who actually observe dorm
quiet hours. The people who voted for
George Bush
Now, by themselves, these idiosyn
crasies are tolerable (the last one not
included). After all, it is your life. It is
when these idiosyncrasies interfere with
the lives of people who are not rule-fol
lowing bozos that it gets ugly.
Take, for example, the employees of
virtually any college admissions office
These people hate college students. They
work in an admissions office so they can
torture college students How do they do
it? Easy. They follow the rules.
“Hello, this is the admissions office."
"Yes, I received a letter that said you
didn’t have my transcripts, but I’m sure
1 sent them ”
“Were they official0”
“Of course they were official. They
were notorized and everything ."
“But, (pregnant pause), were they in
envelopes?”
“Envelopes? Well, no, but they were
tamper-proof. If you will just look at the
document.”
“So you're saying they were not in an
envelope?"
“No. But...”
“Then they are not official ”
“But now' my whole application will be
delayed 1 may not even make the dead
line. 1 may not get accepted How can you
do this to me?"
"It's not my problem voung lady. I’M
JUST FOLLOWING THE RULES.”
Click Dial tone. Primal scream.
Every day — every single day these
toadys make life difficult for normal,
well-adjusted folk like you and me. Take
your average hormonally imbalanced
bar bouncer You present your out-of
state I.D. You smile, because you are 21
“This is expired."
"No, there is an extension sticker on
tiie back"
“It ain’t under the plastic."
“It’s issued by the state police through
the mail You see, I’m from out of town
and that’s the only way 1 can extend the
date.”
“1 don't care if you’re from friggin’
North Island Jamaica World or some
thin’, it ain’t under the plastic.”
“Listen, I come here all the time. If
you’ll just read the sticker."
"1 ain’t gonna read it ’cause it ain’t
under the plastic. Listen sugar, I’M
JUST FOLLOWING THE RULES.”
Shove. Slam. Primal scream.
Ever,' day. The question is — how do
we get nd of them? Can we designate a
certain island somewhere off the Gulf
Coast for them to live? A colony of driv
er’s license bureau workers and tele
phone operators. A tiny place, where
those with tiny minds can sleep eight
hours a day, have 2.3 children, subscribe
to USA Today and eat oat bran.
Think of the possibilities. George Bush
could rule the Isle O' Mindless
Obedience His recent decision not to
extend the visas of Chinese students
proves he is perfect for the job. So what
if, upon their return to the homeland,
they will most likely be brutally mur
dered. When your visa is up, you go
home, that's the rule.
George likes to follow the rules. George
also likes to make the rules. FOR ALL
OF US.
If not the Isle O' Mindless Obedience,
then what? We could round up the little
lick-spittles and force them to experience
life. We could wean them from bologna
and cheese, make them watch K-rated
i movies, stay out late... .
Rut these tactics take time and effort
— time and effort these namby-pambys
don’t deserve.
Something must be done. If not, I fear
the end is near. The day will dawn when
we will all be following the rules.
Primal scream.
Letters to the editor
Society faulty, not SATs
To the Editor:
“Girls do better in high school and col
lege, yet score lower on the SAT "
(February 1990) It's no surprise that
feminists conclude from this that the
SAT is biased against women. A basic
tenet of feminist argument is: Any dif
ference between men and women that
favors men is due to bias against women,
but any difference that favors women is
due to the natural superiority of women
This premise is one-sided. Tb balance
it we would have to argue its opposite
Any difference that favors women is due
to bias against men, but any difference
that favors men is due to the natural
superiority of men If that sounds more
ridiculous to you, it’s because you’ve
been hearing so much feminist propa
ganda that you’ve come to believe it
Otherwise, the headline might read,
“Critics say grade bias costs men jobs,
scholarships.” Our schools are full of
teachers who are frankly sexist, admit
ting openly that theyjust don’t like boys
People who don’t like boys should not be
teaching them.
What needs to be reformed? Not the
SAT, but rather our gullible acceptance
of biased feminist propaganda.
Elbert 1). Porter,
graduate student, U. of Colorado
Remember Rosa Parks
To the Editor:
1 am writing in response to the
February 1990 letter to the editor titled
“Boycotts don’t help.”
Ngeng Hia Phua holds Neanderthal
beliefs, thinking nothing can bo resolved
by boycotting. Maybe he should review
some history books of when Rosa Parks
refused to give up her seat on a bus in
Montgomery, Ala., was subsequently
arrested and became the “Mother of the
Civil Rights Movement.”
Perhaps the South Africans are as tired
as the African-Americans were 25 years
ago and are willing to sacrifice now to get
what’s needed in the future. The long
term goal is much more rewarding and
worth the short-term agony one must go
through to get what's believed in.
I encourage Ngeng Hia Phua to do
more research before screaming out that
it doesn't work. As I write this letter.
Nelson Mandela is now free and many
other positive things are happening in
South Africa.
Keith L. Swann, sophomore
U. of Mary land, College Park
U STUDENT
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Responses to Spring Break U. Poll
In the Spring Break issue, we asked readers
wtiat they would do if an instructor inserted his
opinions in lectures without qualifying the state
ments. Half the students sad they would discuss
it with the professor, 32 percent said they would
do nothing, and 13 percent woud complain to
the instructor's supervisor. Only 5 percent sad
they woud actually drop the class