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About Oregon daily emerald. (Eugene, Or.) 1920-2012 | View Entire Issue (Jan. 28, 1987)
IdatelineI Photo by Shortyn Bh>rk«nn Daphne Singing tree talks with “Dateline” host Cliff Wayne on KOZY-TV. Looking for a date? By Carolyn Lamberson Of the Emerald When Sue Kaufman moved to Eugene last year, she discovered what many other singles in the city already knew — Eugene is boring for single people. "The first thing I noticed when I moved was how dull Eugene was.” she said. “This is a very tough town if you’re single. If you’re athletic, that's one thing — there’s always something to do. But if you’re not. it’s a different story.” Shortly after Kaufman began working in the advertis ing sales department at Group W Cable. KOZY-TV's parent company, she came up with the idea for a televi sion show devoted to helping people meet each other out side the bar scene. KOZY’s “Dateline” program was created in September while Kaufman and her co-host Cliff Wayne were sitting in Cal's House of Donuts across from the sta tion at 990 Garfield St. in Eugene. Both Kaufman and Wayne are single, and they began talking about how difficult it was for singles to meet. Wayne said. “My motivation for helping create the show was that unless one enjoys the bar scene, it is very tough to meet people." Wayne said. “This gives viewers at home a chance to call and request a date.” The premise of the program is relatively simple. Thursday evening from 4:30 to 6 p.m., interested singles show up at the station, fill out a questionnaire, sign a release and sit in front of the cameras to tape a two- or three-minute interview with either Wayne or Kaufman. "Dateline" on KOZY gives singles chance to meet outside bars A month or so later, the tape is aired, and the per son s first name and the station phone number are put on the screen. Then viewers at home interested in meeting with the person call the station and leave their name, age, occupation, marital status and phone number. From there, the station gives the responses to the per son who appeared on the show and allows that person to choose whether or not to call the viewer or viewers, Wayne said. “We usually recommend that if contact is made bet ween a person appearing on the show and a viewer, they should agree to meet somewhere for coffee first.” Kauf man said. That isn t necessary, but that way, no one’s privacy is violated. It’s like making a date to make a date.” Each person on the show usually gets between four and six calls, Wayne said. He added that those numbers might go up when more people begin to watch the program. Although Wayne doesn’t know exactly how many people watch the show, KOZY is carried into 60,000 homes on the cable system, so the potential for a fairly wide viewership is there, he said. “Actually, the number of viewers really depends on what’s on opposite us,” he said. "But hopefully, as more and more people find out about us, they’ll watch.’’ Melody Duncan, 26, said she decided to appear on the show' because she had decided the bar scene just wasn’t her style. I was very nervous about the idea of going on televi sion, she said. ‘But I want to meet a companion, and it’s very hard dating in Eugene. The culture of Eugene is a sort of counter-culture with the ’80s. There’s a very ’60s attitude in this town." Once Duncan got up in front of the cameras, her fears disappeared, she said. “The interviewers are very special people. They made me feel very much at ease." she said. Miss Tyna (a nickname). 35. had heard about the show from a friend who kept telling her to go on the air. "1 had tried running ads in the personal section of the newspaper simply because my parents first met through the personals, but that didn’t work for me." she said. "A television show is more update for the ’80s. "As soon as 1 walked in. though. I thought I should turn around and leave. I mean, can you imagine Mr. Right calling for a date?" Wayne sees the show as something fairly innovative. ‘It takes awhile to get things down to a pattern, but things are getting better." Wayne said. "This is the first time in front of the camera for both Susan and I. so it’s been a real experience. This is definitely a show of possibilities." Traditional' dating service attracts those looking for security, marriage By Carolyn Lamberaon Of Iht a—«K For singles who are tired of Eugene's bar scent; but don't like the idea of looking for a date on television, there are more traditional dating ser vices available. Odell Durfee established Selective Introduc tions four years ago. and since then, she said she has noticed a change in the attitudes of singles. "When I first started, the reasons people gave for coming here wore either they didn't have the time for the bar scene or the inclination." she said. "Now I find people coming hen; and other places like this for security. Many art* afraid of contracting some social disease. "Many hope that someone who is willing to pay for this kind of dating service might be more discrete in their personal relations." Selective Introductions currently has 224 members. Durfee said the organization sponsors four to five socials each week. These social ac tivities range from New England clam bakes in Florence, skiing and bowling to river rafting, a trip to Keno and roller skating, she said. "We often plan activities that involve the whole family so they do not feel left out." Durfee said. "Many times, children resent their parents dating, and this helps them to feel more involved." Her clients range from blue-collar workers to at torneys. surgeons and entrepreneurs, she said. Every interested client must come into the of fice and complete a personal interview. After pay ing an initial entrance fins, the new member is given a membership card with non-confidential information and a photograph. Dnrfee said Members then can look through the photographs of other members ami determine who they would like to go out with, she said. Like hOZY-TV's "Dateline" program. Onrtee only gives out the first name and phone uumlier and recommends that the first meeting la? in public, she said. In the first year of operation. Solncivn Introduc tions averaged about one wedding among members every third month. Durfee said Now. the average is up to two a month. "What's been interesting is that in that four years, then* has only been one divon:e," she said. "Hut of course, not everyone is looking for mar* riaga.V she added. "A lot of our members are looking for friends — other men and women for companionship. About fHJ percent are hopeful (of finding a marriage partner.)" TMRIOMV" haircut *12.95 Includes Shampoo, Conditioning and Precision Cut Special Sale Days Monday and Thursday v $10 QS All Cuts Are • ~ ~ * Professional K' 100% satisfaction guaranteed 561 C. 13th (across from fSa* s) Open Saturdays 485-4422 Free Parking 4 The Saga Continues WEDNESDAY NIGHT at TRACK TOWN PIZZA Get a medium (12") One-Ingredient Pizza for ONLY . . . < J<M« m4 I cm IM ||W, t«|i Why settle for less . . . than the BEST!?! FREE DELIVERY c:> i*rrr 484-2799 1809 Franklin Blvd. Group workshops help people make positive changes \ ny Karen i.reighton Of ihf Kmrrald Learning how to solve problems and make positive changes in life is the focus of sessions of fered by a local counseling business. Choices Consulting and Counseling. 1414 Kin caid St., offers individual counseling, workshops and on-going groups to facilitate change for ordinary people with ordinary problems. Counselors Thomas Fisher and Tamara Oglesby run the sessions. Groups and workshops are offered to comple ment individual counseling and to reduce the costs of therapy. Long expensive therapy isn’t necessary for peo ple who don't have hig problems. Fisher said, ”l>ecause it validates that you need someone else to do it for you. ’ ’ “We work with the deep knowing in the person, in their subconscious and in their body,” he said. Homework assignments are given to train people to be their own best guides in personal growth. Individual counseling offeis much attention in a safe environment, hut insights gained may not he ap plied outside of sessions. Fisher said. Groups and workshops are more affordable, and new behaviors can be practiced with other people in the group, he said. Combining group and individual counseling gives the advantages of both, he added. “We hope to offer the most value with the least disadvantages,” he said. One key to personal growth is a non-judgmental observation of life. Fisher said. When people judge some parts of themselves as being had or when they resist their problems, the problems only escalate, he said. The way to solve a problem is to acknowledge it, stop resisting it. and ask it to teach what lessons it has, he continued. crncn *®r*5L-**««** 9***+*+. ***** V-; HilK 'AtTifcif ****** Ml iiw», jrywllfpjy#^^ iSWBI Thomas fisher and Tamara Oglesby operate Choices Consulting and Counseling. 1414 Kincaid St." In o^life 'rm lhat “n *rOUP 'r°rkshops forPnb,»m solving and for making positive changes An example of this comes from Fisher's own life. While starting his new counseling business, he was drinking three to four big coffees a day, creating a problem with money and caffeine. Telling himself that he shouldn’t drink so much coffee didn’t help so he finally decided to observe his coffee drinking habit with compassion rather than judgments. He then noticed that whenever he recieved some kind of success by letter or phone, he would create an errand and get coffee on the way. He also did this when something unpleasant came up. After six mon ths of just observing, his bad habit fell away. Fisher still drinks coffee, but it's different now. he said. Another key to change is becoming aware of how one views the world. Fisher said. "Most of us go around asleep to the fact that we have a world view and to the fact that we believe our world view is true," he said. Becoming aware of one’s world view is impor tant because a person's experience is determined by his or her world view, hut most of us don't know this, Fisher said. Our fundamental belief is that our beliefs are true, he said. "What we don't realize is that there are alter natives, fisher said. When people realize that their world view is learned, they gain power because they can then change it. he said. “I’m incredibly powerful because I can change my world view.” Fisher said. The idea is to become a master of one’s own world view, not the victim, he added. For most people, fear is associated with chang ing their world view because they can't change just the parts that are convenient and comfortable. Fisher said. Changing a world view requires changing the whole picture, he said. If people were honest. Fisher said, they would have to admit that most of their actions are fear based. A fear-based life is uncomfortable, he said. If people get rid of fear, they are left with love. Most of us shift back and forth from fear-based actions to love-based actions. Fisher said. In the Choices sessions, people aren’t going to places they haven't been before; they are just becoming more aware of how to move from fear to love, he said. Being able to change one's world view has social and spiritual implications, he added. Turn to Choices, Page 8 s Malaysian * Hot Dish Laksa $350 Serving for lunch CHINA BLUE Restaurant ' /7 » 879 E. 13th. 343-2832 \c\t to the VO Bookstore, upstairs SWEATS $099 Cortex / Outerwear 40-60% Sports Factory Outlet The Winchell Connection 949 Pearl Street (between 10th & Broadway) 10-6 Mon-Sat 343-8352 f poppi > C REEK T A V F. R N A Real Greek Food Imported Beers, Greek Wines and Daily Specials Closed Tuesday 675 East 13th, Eugene 343-0846 J Sunday — Feb. 1 Men’s Basketball >vs Stanford tip-off changed to 3 pm
