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About Oregon daily emerald. (Eugene, Or.) 1920-2012 | View Entire Issue (Jan. 6, 1981)
reporter's notebook Burley, brandy and broken cars By KIRK KNIGHTON Of «T»* Emerald Christmas. Ah yes, the time of joy and love, of family gather ings at home with the traditional turkey dinner shared by all who find Christmas to be the most spiecial time of year. And all that jazz My original plans for Christ mas were something akin to the traditional scenario. After having spent the first hialf of the holidays hiking in the canyon country of southern Utah (85 degrees during the day, 15 at night), my friend and I were headed back to Oregon. I was Christmas Eve, and w< anticipated arriving in Portlan< for a fete de noel early Christ mas afternoon. We stopped briefly in Sal Lake City to search out a liquo store. We bought a bottle o brandy, which we figured woul< add the finishing touch to ou Christmas spirits and perhap make the drive to Portland mor interesting. Warm and snug in my ancien — but always reliable — Volks wage n Squareback, we sped ol into the night, full of high spirit t for the coming of the morrow, i and all the joy Christmas would I surely bring us. Not long after crossing the Idaho border my brandy-satur t ated nose thought it detected r the odor of something burning, f Moments later my eyes had 1 similar feelings about the sud r den incandescence of the gen 5 erator warning light. Uh-oh, i they seemed to say in unison. Then my brain started working, t A burned-out generator? How far can we drive on the battery f alone? s We passed a road sign. Bur Want to: *READ FASTER AND REMEMBER MORE? *STUDY MORE EFFECTIVELY? PREVIEW THE BASICS OF GRAMMAR AND USAGE? Sign up for a 4-week workshop in Academic Speed Reading, Study Techniques, or The Least You Should Know About Grammar, sponsored by the Learning Resources Center. For schedule information, call the LRC at 686-3226 or come by our office in Friendly Hall. Bausch & Lomb SOFLENS ONE PRICE/ONE DAY >169 00 Complete Price includes eye examination, contact lenses, chemicol disinfection supplies, and complete follow-up service with most fittings completed in the some doy. 680-2224 Contact Lens Clinic of Eugene 401 E. 10th walking distance to the University Dr. Philip Stockstad, Optometrist Visa ond MOsterchorge Welcome Financing Available on Approved Credit ley, it said. 40 miles. In the name of conservation I switched off the headlights and increased our speed to 75 mph. “Don’t worry,” I assured my friend. "I can see just fine with the parking lights. I’ll switch on the headlights whenever we come across another car. In the meantime let’s have'some more of that Christmas juice.” We made it to Burley without incident, the car coughing and sputtering, its headlights barely illuminating the road ahead. The engine expired as the car rolled into the parking lot of a Motel 6. There was no hope, of course, of finding a new generator for a German car in a dreary town of 8,000 inhabitants on Christmas Eve. While my friend showered away his misery I stole out into the night to find some food I noticed a lone Burger King sign glowing down the street. It switched off when I reached it. I went inside. “Sorry mister," a girl an nounced as I came in. "We're closed.” “Oh, but what am I to do?” I countered, somewhat drama tically. “My car is broken and I'm stuck here for Christmas, hundres of miles from home.” This unexpected oration roused whimpers of sympathy from all the little burger-makers. One of them went over to the manager and whispered something in his ear. She then came over to me. “It’s Christ mas, so we’re going to give you all of our leftover Whoppers and burgers. How’s that sound?” The burger-makers scurried about the kitchen assembling my Christmas present. With a hearty chorus of "Merry Christ mas” they presented me with three bulging sacks. “Thanks," I sniffled as I left. My friend, being a devout vegetarian, did a backflip when I walked into the room bearing the sacks of burgers. My friend refused to eat any of the burgers, so I gave him all the onion rings and french fries. We ate about half our ration, wash ing it down with brandy. Feeling deathly ill, we both expired for the night. On Christmas Day we walked from one end of Burley to the other (which takes about an hour) in search of a Volkswagen generator. But no form of busi ness was open. We couldn't even find a cup of coffee. We ended up roaming used car lots, peering through shop windows and examining local architec ture. Christmas dinner was, of course, back at the Motel 6. The menu? Three cheese Whoppers and brandy for me, and four bags of onion rings and brandy for my friend. We watched Henry Winkler play Scrooge on cable television.;,We expired, once again, in a drunken, greasy sloth. But the joy of the day after Christmas. While my friend lay in bed, lamenting his body’s reaction to Christmas dinner, I went out and immediately found a new generator. An hour later we left forever the fair town of Burley. The maid, coming into our room just as we were leaving, had wished us a merry Christ mas. She then took notice of the room, strewn as it was with the gift wrap of all our burger stuff. “Merry Christmas," we said. And with that we were off. f EUGENE VISION CENTER Dr. John Perkins, Dr. Claude Brist if >-v 396 E. 18th at Mill Street \ Contact Lenses Family Vision Care 686-8321
