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About The nugget. (Sisters, Or.) 1994-current | View Entire Issue (Jan. 20, 2016)
6 Wednesday, January 20, 2016 The Nugget Newspaper, Sisters, Oregon How to build “grit” By edie Jones Columnist Earlier this month we asked the question, “Are there helicopter parents in Sisters?” Parents are asking: “How do you avoid falling into the trap of being over- protective or rescuing? You certainly don’t want your kids to fail and experience the humiliation and disap- pointment that comes with all of that.” Stepping back and let- ting our kids work through problems can be very ben- eficial. As the popular par- enting program, “Parenting With Love and Logic,” by Jim Fay and Foster Cline teaches, the earlier you allow children to have to deal with consequences the better. Not turning in home- work in elementary school is far less costly than not turning in an assignment in high school. And, as we all know, poor choices in the teen years can lead to dev- astating consequences. Give your toddlers lim- ited choices. Step back and see if your third-grader starts his homework on his own. Allow your kids to make mistakes. They will learn far more from mis- takes than successes. When successful we celebrate and move on; when we make a mistake we don’t want it to happen again so we take time to figure out what went wrong. Of course, your kids may need guidance from you to complete this pro- cess. That’s part of the job of being a parent This is also the advice of Joe Hosang, Sisters High School principal. By not rescuing, allow- ing the skills of persever- ance and “grit” to develop, parents are helping their kids move closer to the life they will experience as adults. Teach them the skills they’ll need in real life, giv- ing enough leash to practice those skills on their own. You’ll probably be sur- prised at how well they do. What if there are special needs? Respond as needed — and that may mean some adjustments. I know a mom of a child diagnosed with ADHD (Attention Deficit Hyperactivity Disorder). Her young man can’t pos- sibly do homework after a day in school. However, he’s a very early riser (4 a.m.). Her response is to rise with him, providing the right atmosphere for home- work to be accomplished. She’s responding as needed. Once your child has learned to do something, make it a “rule of thumb” not to do it for them. Of course, there are times this isn’t possible (as in, you have to get out the door and naked bodies aren’t appropriate) and you need to intervene. However, fol- lowing it most of the time will save any parent lots of work in the future. Of course, a skill you have to develop to go with that is patience — something we need anyway to succeed in every situation. Gordon’s Last Touch Cleaning Specialists For… 541-549-3008 Carpets • Upholstery Windows Accepting VISA & MasterCard! Snow Removal! Member of the Better Business Bureau Serving Central Oregon Since 1980 Bonded & Insured Join us! CRAB FEED Sat., , Jan. J 30th 3 All-you-can-eat buffet... crab, oysters, spaghetti & meatballs, pasta Alfredo, g garlic bread & red p potatoes. Begins at 5 p.m., call for reservations... 541-549-3663 Too often we parents do much to keep our kids from facing challenges, helping them find an easier solution to a problem. Carol Dweck, a Stanford researcher, has found that children who avoid challenges display a fixed mindset: feeling that their intelligence is a fixed trait, they avoid chal- lenges that “stretch” them. Children who embrace and take on challenges dem- onstrate a growth mindset, appraising their abilities as something they can change and develop. When parents say, “You put a lot of effort into that paper,” instead of, “You are so smart!” they are foster- ing a growth mindset. Even though it may be many years before your child heads off to college or are on their own, it is never too early to begin teaching the skills they will need. Chores are a magnifi- cent teaching tool. Build them into everyday activi- ties, beginning with tod- dlers putting toys away or elementary-aged children making their beds, taking out the trash, and empty- ing the dishwasher. Middle school and high school kids can help younger sib- lings with homework and assist with shopping and meals. And, once you have a driver, be sure to hand over many of the time-con- suming “chores” that make most parents’ days stressful and exhausting. Save your energy so you can be the cheerful, helpful mom or dad needed when you do need to step in. Bingo draws a big crowd By Izaak Kanzig Correspondent Nearly 250 members of the Sisters commu- nity attended a bingo night at Sisters High School last Monday, January 11. Running for over four years now, Outlaws Together Bingo Night has become a classic event for families to enjoy bingo, a silent auction, a bake sale, and a high-qual- ity meal. The silent auction bas- kets and prizes are sponsored by specific sports teams for the season that bingo night coincides with. On Monday, many prize baskets were sponsored by the boys and girls basketball teams, Outlaw wrestling, the alpine ski team, SHS Cheer, as well as the small but proud eques- trian team. Along with the team sponsorships, Sisters Coffee Co., Blazin Saddles, Sisters Movie House, Bedouin, Dutch Bros., Martolli’s Pizza, and many others con- tribute bingo prizes and auc- tion items. Tim Roth, the athletic director at Sisters High School, with his ambition of unifying the teams and bolstering the spirit of the photo by izaaK Kanzig Patrick Krevi fills out a bingo sheet. school, began the event when he started working at SHS in 2012. Roth stated that the bingo nights raise nearly $20,000 a year, and that money is spread over all the athletic programs at SHS, going toward travel expenses, pay- to-play, and coach salaries. “We will always hold the philosophical aspect of working together as a school just as much as the financial aspect,” Roth said. The next bingo night will be in the spring of this year, put on by the track, baseball, and tennis teams. WE’RE NOT JUST TIRES! We do... Alignments, Brakes, Shocks, Struts, CV Joints, U Joints, Axle Shafts, Drivelines, & Tire Siping ...not only cars, but trailers, too! DAVIS TIRE 541-549-1026 Serving Sisters Since 1962 188 W. Sisters Park Dr. In Sisters Industrial Park across from SnoCap Mini Storage Year-round FIREWOOD SALES — Kindling — — — SISTERS FOREST PRODUCTS 541-410-4509 SistersForestProducts.com Warm up wih our homemade soup 541-549-0527 • 273 W. Hood Ave. Breakfast 6-11 | Lunch 11-2 daily | Buy coffee at SistersCoffee.com
