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About Heppner gazette. (Heppner, Morrow County, Or.) 1892-1912 | View Entire Issue (Feb. 11, 1909)
SCIENTISTS SAY ADAM WAS A PICJ All Physicians Must prescribe some of the In gredients that ere contained In Hood's Sarsaparilla - for all trou bles of the blood, stomach, kid neys and liver. They include parsaparilla, BtillinKia, yellow dock, gentian, wild cherry hark, mandrake, dandelion, juniper berries, pipsisaewa, etc. The combination and proportions an our own formula and give power to cure beyond the reach of any other prescrip tion or euoKtitute. That's why it i wiae to get Hood's and only IloodV "ADAM" AND SOME OF HIS DESCENDANTS. VIA SACRA. Nowly bIoiik the crowded street I go. Marking with reverent look each passer's face ; SeekiiirJ, and not in vniu, in each to trace That primal soul whereof lie is the show. For here still move, by many eyes un f pen. The blessed gods that erst Olympus kept; Through every guise these lofty forms serene Declare the all-holding life hath never slept, But known each thrill that in man's heart hath been And every tear Chat his sad eyes have wept, Alas for us! the heavenly visitants Ye grvet them still as most unwelcome puests, Answering their smile with hateful looks askance, Their sacred speech with foolish bitter jests ; But oh, what is it to imperial .love That this poor world refuses all his love! Charles A. Dana. "You should have seen her stare. "'Am I to understand. Maria, she asked, flxins poor mother with here eye, 'that this child has visitors from whose company her parents and her biothers and sisters are barred?' " "Times have changed, Nuncy,' said dad, looking silly." "And Aunt Nancy?" prompted the iK'Soin friend. " 'In my time,' said Aunt Nancy, 'it was our greatest pleasure to have our parents and all the family enter Into our enjoyments and help In the en tertainment of our friends. Hospitality meant something then, and I believe our puests enjoyed themselves. It seems to me anything but dignified for parents to be excluded, or for any room In their house to he shut away from I declare!" said the bosom Nannette's Woe i - - "Aunt Nancy's come," Nannette an nounced to her 1k)soui friend in a choked voice, "and of all the frights!" "What do you mean?" asked her bosom friend. "Well," hesitated Nannette, "of course she's as neat as can be, but her clothes look as if they were made for Mrs. Methuselah." "If it's only her clothes, you needn't worry," remarked the bosom friend. "You don't have to wear 'em." "It's not only her clothes!" shrieked Nannette. "It's her notions ! They are simply appalling." "For instance?" suggested the bosom friend, taking a look-at her back hair in tiie mirror with the helo of a hand glass. 'For ono thing, she objects to my name," explained Nannette, Indignant ly. "The very first thing she did nfter taking a comprehensive view of the family -was to start at me through her spectacles steel-rlnimed ones, at that and ask: 'Is this one Nancy, my godchild?' "Dad, who Is as proud as can be of Ids enormous family, looked a little sheepish at that. " 'Y-y-yes he stuttered. 'We had her christened Nancy, of course, but Bhe has taken a fnncy to be called er Xnnnctte.' " 'Humph!" said Aunt Nancy." "Haven't I always heard you speak of your Aunt Nancy as a paragon?" demanded the bosom friend. "Haven't you told me time and time again that your father looks upon her as the salt of the earth?" 'He does," acknowledged Nannette. "And so do I at n distance. But be cause she Is dad's favorite sister why must I follow her old fogy notions? "Why sho was perfectly scandalized at the Idea of my entertaining Charles all the evening without the assistance of the other members of the family ! The Idea! "Of course when the bell rang at the accustomed hour, that horrid Tom had to bellow out, 'It's Nan's Tuesday night beau. Aunt Nancy. Parlor's pre cmptod for the evening.' them.' " "Well, friend. "Now, do you wonder that I was frightened at the Idea of Charles meet ing her?" asked Nannette. "But I haven't told you the worst. gloomy emphasis. "I slipped away while she was still holding forth, hop ing that she. would forget all about it. But I couldn't shake off my fore bodings and the conversation flagged." "Nothing unusual In that. Is there?" wickedly Interposed the bosom friend. "Charles actually began to Ipok bored," continued Nannette, "and then we lMith had such a shock! If you manner. I don't know when I have seen Charles so interested. It was strange talk to me, too, for, as dad says. I have neglected to cultivate my mind. "They talked about literature, art, politics, and even science, and I had to sit there like a dummy and listen to them. 'Even while he was holding my hand to say good night he was looking at ami talking to Aunt Nancy. "Now what do you think of that? "I think you're lucky that your Aunt Nancy is too old for Charles to marry," said the bosom friend. Chicago Daily News. MISSIONARY'S LITTLE JOKE. !! Preferred One tiirl. When J. M. I'arrie, the author of "Peter Pan." addressed an audience of a thousand girls at Smith College dur ing his first American visit of last ye.ir, a friend asked him how he had found the experience. "Well," replied Mr. Barrio, "to tell you the truth, I'd much rather talk a thousand times to one gir! than to talk one time to a thousand girls." PJTC St. Vltn' Dance una nrvoiw MiHewiet! perm I 1 1 J nently cured ly hr. 1 -ine'H Groat Nerve lie tori'r. Bern! for FREE $2 00 trial IxiHle an'l treatir,. lit. H. II. Kline, Ld., J1 Arch hit., Philadelphia, Expert Opinion. "In your jedgment," asked the caller, "what is the future of the aeroplane?" "It's all up in the air !" . savagely an swered the information editor, who had made the same response to the question forty-seven times before. Chicago Trib une. CASTORS A Por Infants and Children. The Kind Yea Havo Always Bought Bears the He Knew. Tracher Tommy, who was Cleopatra? Tommy Tucker Cleopatra was the col ored woman who used to do our washin', ma'am. Her other name was Jackson. P'Lrs CURED IN 6 TO 14 DAYS PAZO OINTMENT is guaranteed to cure any case of ltchir.PT, Blind. Ridding or Protruding Piles in 6 to 14 days or money refunded. 60c. Uerauence. "Is it true," inquired the traveler who was standing in front of the Art Insti tute, hat a confidence man once sold these !iig bronze lions to a trusting s'ran- ger tor . or some sucti nititul sum; "Yep," said the policeman ; "the con jnen in this town are losin' their grip. I can remember when they wouldn r sell ncthin' smaller than the Masonic Temple to a vawoo. (i:iT"i 1 ri'mne. MY "she objects to NAME." come Inter will believe me, who should marching Into the room but "Aunt Nancy?" breathlessly rupted the bosom friend. "Aunt Nancy," repented Nanette. "Wasn't It awful? I had been bo afraid of something of the kind. She planted herself In the only Btrnlght backed chair In the room and, sitting bolt upright, gave me my orders: '"Now, Nancy, Introduce to me your friend.' "Charles had been lounging In his chair and I assure you, Isabel, that the way she looked him over through her spectacles made him straighten up in short order. "I felt as If I should sink through the floor when she came In wearing her plain black dress and white collar and cuffs, her hair parted in the middle and plastered down on each side, look ing the world ns If It had been var nished, she had brushed It so smooth. You know how stylish and exclusive Charles' people are? "Well, before I knew it. they were talking together iu the most animated IIw He Lengthened the Day tor a Korean Vlllnse. The Koreans in the vicinity of Seoul, the capital city, and around the treaty ports are fast losing their eariy puile lessness in trying to follow the march of western civilization, says 'Ac Youth's with 1 Companion. In the mountains of the interior, uowever, conditions are much the same as in the days when Korea could justly be termed the "hermit na tion" and the inhabitants knew little and cared less about occidental pro gress. Ainorig the American missionaries who were in the habit of making pro tracted trips in the interior of the coun try there was one wlio, in addition to being a zealous worker, was also a good deal of a wag. On the occasion of one of his Inland journeys he found himself at nightfall in n small village, where lie was to spend the night in the straw-thatched dwelling of one of the native converts. The sleeping chamber was the usual tiny room, heated by n system of flues beneath the mud floor and rendered nearly air-tight by closely fitting oil paper, windows and doors. It was fearfully hot and about mid night the American could stand It no longer, so he strolled out In the open for a breath of air. The village was wrapped in slumlier, so just for a joke and with no ulterior motive the mis sionary let out n lusty Imitation of a rooster's crow. This was immediately taken up by a wakeful bird In a court yard near and In a few minutes every fowl was adding his morning salute to the general chorus. Now watches and alarm clocks wert an unknown luxury In the village and the people were accustomed to time their rising hour by the roosters. In n few moments, therefore, the sleepy Korenns came straggling out of their little hutp and after starting the fires on which to boil the morning rice lighted their long bamboo pipes and squatted round In little groups to wait for sunrise. Their amazement can be Imagined when the hours went by and still there were no signs of light In the east. "Irun chanie," s;iid one to another. as with ojH'n mourn ue ponuerea over the phenomenon. Yours have passed since then, but in at least one village In Korea all events still date back to "the night when the morning didn't come." VYA Vl vmivi EUxvV'jSewcva Ceawscs Ve System Eectxa Dispels cods awd Hea&a&Yies &xuo Cos)Olo; Acs iauvoty, adsXnAy as aLaxave. To CeX Ws )Gtvc5Vc.a eJJccXs, aXways buy & Genume manufactured by tke CALIFORNIA Fig Syrup Co. SOLD BY ALL LEADING DRUGGISTS one aize only, regular price 50 per bottle. BiLLIOMSeeilSS 5353 Costs 60c 90c pur ace tor seed. E&BJM mj i.-,t wonderful r.-ras!i of tiieceiiturr.viplillntr iroin PM .i to 10 toil of nut ). r a ro all "i-t of im.-turt' !. Viiles. ItMiii).!)-vr.l..(rrons.trrotti ! Cut it lull v i t'ld in 4 wcvke 1 1 loi,;,r. .-r the mnwtT a.-in, r,l K no on. Grow h ml rt uir!ios pvitvw hfrv, on o ,ert I funn In Amorua. ( lnm its dirt lu tiirhint n ti o j bottom lunde of F(r.t t. Urn rVi ratalo tree or . xMid lOo in stamps nd r-i. ive nitiiit of thif. omipriiii trrs.HIsooI S),,Mt',, the ivr. ,u wonder. Marie?. Oat, clover, (.ras'i., etc.. eti'.,and i-atn-l'ir free. Or s ml 4c "d MI a. id a sample farm seed noTeit.v liever eteen liy j ou tiefore. SALZER SEED CO.. Box FC la Crosse. Wis. ! Annweretl (be Ilrqulrementa. "I want to give her a usoful pres ent that costs enough to make it seem worth while." he said to the obliging salesman of the great department store. "What do you say to a dozen strict ly fresh eggs?" the salesman obliging ly suggested. Cleveland Louder. The 2 "FLYERS" are the O. R. & N. fast through trains between PORTLAND and SPOKANE "Anything I can nhow yon, ir? 'Vus; 1 want to get somo kind of tny for my 3-year-old hoy. Have yon any thing that's iii(lfstriictib!(!? Something he can't break the first time he plays with it?" "I think ko. We have some toy flat iropM." "Have llify Kot handles on 'em?" "Of con MP." "Well, they won't Inst him five min utes. Show m" Hom!h'ne pIsp." IteKK'ioH, Illl I'nrtlon. There once was a versatile, kaiser. Who in handing out talk was no miser; He got a straight tip To button his lip. And now th" kaispr is wiser. Chicago Tribune. On'y One "BROKO QUININE" That is LAXATIVE, BROMO QUININE. Look for Ihe eirrnaturo of E. W. GROVE. Used the world over to Cure a Cold in One Day. 25c. GfttlnK Aciiunineil. dad can lick yotir'n," said Dad "My Dick. "Maybe he can," ans-verml the now bey with the golden curls, "hut I can whale the everlasting daylights out of you." Which he proceeded to do, with nent npss and dispatch, and they were firm friends therp-ifter. -a i . a.r u if! Beware of the Cough that lianfrs on persistently, breaking your rielit'a rest anr! exhausting you with the violence of the paroxysms. A fe.wdtise3 of I'iso's Cure will relieve won derfully any cough, no matter how f r advanced or serious. It soothes and heals the irritated surf k-s, cleai-s the slotted 'r passages and the cough disap pears. At all dnigsuu. 23 -U. PTE- 5V: 4 Recipe for Rheumatism. To one-half pint gcod whiskey, add one ounce syrup sarsaparilla, and one ounce Toris compound, which can be procured of any druggist. Take in teaspoonful doses before each meal and before retiring. Followed up, this is a sure remedy. Sitcrulnt Inn' Demoralizing, Effect. "How about your gold mining stock, old chap? Siill panning out well?" "I'anrijng out? No. Next thing to it, though. It's Petering out." Chicago Tribune. OUT OF BOOR WORKERS Men who cannor sroo for a rainy day.- Will find Ihe greatest comfort and freedon of bodily movement WATERPROOI OILED CLOTHING, SUCKERS 5UITS32? Every garment bearing the sian of the fish" Suarqn.eed waterproof Catalog free i I A I 1 'f I Illl I 1 t 9 I I III 6Uf L4 A -NT CAN I Hope Offered. When first I sought the writers' ranks My verse was taken In with thanks. Tis years since that Initial Rplash They've never sent the promised cash. Io wait and get no nay. I find, a worse than having thins declined. flpfpiomi pin in IVHler Mothers will find Mrs. Wlnslow Soothlna Byrui th b at rfim'ilv to use for their chiidrea rianug itie tvathiiiK leriod. ( nller Mo Olillffittion. "Spnaior, you surely will vote for this measure." "Why Khonld I?" "It's for the henpfit of postprify." "I'osterity inny po ha-'g! I know al ready what posterity will say about me, and I'm goins to eet evpn with it before hand. I shall vote against the bill just to spite po-'tority." Uncle Jerry. "I shouldn't wonder," said Cncle Jerry Peebles, "if there was something in this idee that the condition of a man's teeth has a whole lot to do with his moral character. The bijucest liar I ever knew in my life wore a full set of false teeth." Chicajo Tribune. wmmm Ffrrv'i rtre tst lteranfir' PTr?rr Tfar i ho ri'tnilrr L'fts ft new snnril v. f; eshlT (tv-tecl oiid u :trii. Yen r.'n no risK of noorWl.rr t crr'-mnant sioi-VB. We take the pairs; yon pa ilierooalis. Hoy of the b' st (.'auii'ivd ai.tl mrtf'tpxix'rt seed (rrow- ors in America. It is to onr Bdvantat" to tft'iKfy yuu. we will. For BnlP every- wbcre. Our iWi St-ed Annual tre. Write to D. tn. FERRY ft CO, Deiolt, Mich. P N U No. 7-09 AT 7 fl KN writing to advertisers pleaio mention tniA paper. r( I Ml DO ALL I 13 wia do Aa TIUT ANT HKiH PRICED POWDER WIU CI DO AND DO ir BETTER SCENT Ess-Pfcsphate WDER Mm pc A FULL POUND 25c Get it from your Grocer The Alveolar System Of Replacing Teeth in the Human Mouth is the Greatest Advance Ever Made in Scientific Dentistry A few years asro Marconi came before the world with the statement that he could transmit mesa-res through the eir by electricity without the use of wirvs. Every teiejrrapb operator in the land scoffed at the idea anil said it could not bo done. Likewise the Alveolar System c f r p'acinp teeth in the htmian mouth without the use of cumbersome and unsightly plates, which is the latest method to be adopted by scientiiic dentistry. If you have two or more teeth in either jaw-, either tieht or looe ones (we make the loose ones tieht and healthy) we guarantee to put in for you a beautiful set of teeth that can hardly be told from natural ones. All work absolutely painless. These Teeth Will Outlast Those Who Are Wearing Them If we can beautify your appearance and build up your heal'h with a new set of Alve olar System teeth, or enable you to do away wi'h a wobbly, unclean, ptrtial plate or ill fittintr piece of ordinary bridtfe-woik, wouldn't it be the greatest service that could be done for you ? mm We make absolutely NO CHARGE for advice We examine your mouth and advise conscientiously i I, !, I The ALVEO LAR SYSTEM is to the old time methods what Wireles is to the ordinary Telegraphy "It didn't hurt a bit. Now for my Alveolar Teeth." In a case like the above, all dentists throw up their hands and say there is no hope ex cept in the use of a false plate. The Alveolar System solves the problem and now p'.ates are seldom necessary unless every tooth is frone. We are positively painless dentists in every branch, and for 30 days we make the following money -saving prices: 22K Gold or Porcelain Crowns ... - $3.50 Bridge Work (all kinds) each tooth . - - $3.50 Silver Fillings 25c and 50c We are expert plate makers ... $3.50 up Painless Extracting (free with all work) - - 50c Write for our Booklet, which will be sent free. "The Great Alveolar Electric System." We are the only real Alveolar Dentists in I'ortland. Beware of imitators. We do work for out-of-town people in shortest possible time. The Alveolar Electric Painless Dentists Dentists of 5 to 20 Years Active Practice in Portland N. L Corner Fourth and Washington Streets PORTLAND, ORE. 8 a. m. to 8 p. m. Office Hours: Sundays, 9 a. m. to 12. WM. McMURRAY, G. P. A. Portland I i1 i jjp Entrance 110 1-2 Phone 4th St. A1171 A. Flavoring. It m; kc a syrup better tnan Maple. jl SolJ by firocerau PUTNAM FADELESS DYES Color more roods brighter and faster colors than any other dye. One 10c package colors silk, wool and cotton equally well and is guaranteed to give perfect results. Ask dealer, or we wUl send post raid at Cc a package. Vnte toi tee bookie tow to dye, bleachjand mix colers. MONROE DRUG COMPANY , Quincy, LUnoiu J