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About The Coos Bay times. (Marshfield, Or.) 1906-1957 | View Entire Issue (Aug. 13, 1915)
Vf ftfv ,'; THE COOS BAY TIMES. MARSHFIELD. OREGON. FRIDAY, AUGUST 6, 1915 EVENING EDITION. THREE . ! K The Central Avenue Booster u I I CENTRAL AVENUE, FRIDAY, AUdUST 111. 11)15 No. no Oh ! . ,mmi!'K SAKE TAKE r,)U vmii SODIUM PHOSPHATE SftUIBB'S , B,her of t'-" ",",,lt!,' 1Mlr Sgnn" 1MU),)l'CTS A nl ' wl,Pt form tnkon licforo lirciikfnBt, It iiiiikcb a mlltt jn the of'i'S' '-," bMt certain luxntlu.. "The Owl", rrnnk I). Colum. syrnm imu stori I If People Wore WHITE SUITS would they have them cleaned? JAY DOYLE TAILORING cleaning, PRESSING Will call anywhere any time. I'll (Wml Au'titiu Disadvaintage MAN Ih nt n tllHiulvniitago when lio lias no money with which to lalto iiilviiutiiKu of tlio ninny opportunities Unit coiiio hl wny "REAL OP PORTUNITY comes only to tho ninn with renrty money." Why not Btnrt kuvIiik Right fow mill ho ready. Wo will help on hIoiik by paying you Internet on your kuvIiibs. First National B Of Coos BayJJ tentrai Avenue Marshfield. Oreaon ... ... -r . w Make Your Home Beautiful V tan ii MmuT mid a SpiluMor will do much towards keeping your I Ian n lu lluu hlmpo. We tunc Ihoni In tho host makes. Jiiht look at our window. E Central Avenue and ltroadway. ill HELD HARDWAR A Qrfo . llULlL Z olJl IT . a-a mji it,' JWiiail J&. JL& 3L JTliglFO joosor TIIK CENTRAL AVENUE HOOSTER If he treats you and you do not Guy , .. , ihlm a drink In return he will never Published Etcry Friday In the Inter- I r0rKlve you. , est of Coos liny lu General and j SMILE-A-WHILH S12Jr"!"e"ta!i:., ... A Coo. Ray girl will ape,,,, four .i " ... ,. . T. B w," wholo houra dolling herself up co """"'" iu "uui)i oiuu , ... . , , Everyonc'necds, and cannot afford to be without a Tricolator for making COFFEE Because it makes the best Coffee Always the same Fits Any Coffee Pot It's inexpensive and "Fool Proof." OIKvant & Weaver Exclusive Agents Corner Third and Central. Phono 1 99. "" v" io Wl Iook K00,l ,0 yo W1C, tM'ltp.rn! nt tho I,0Blofflc as strictly! you see her. And then she Is sup arSiaa:' to et mad necuusc you rub-- her. i-'ku i:i:s orr coos iiavh popu- ! LATIOX IK p SMILE-A-WHIl Phone 1M0-X !"Mo0fr Mo aF Tho When In j Smokehouse" Want f r !our ! Fire, Life and Ma-b That's what wo want you to toll I your friends. Use our chairs, use tour lobby or telephone. Wo nre only too Klad to bo of service Wo have the Lie leauiiQ scores every ove- Jtoe Insurance which. ItlSUreS cp I If y0U wnnt the lntcst iHasazhies, i cj See I a Rood smoke, the best that an np- ' to-dato tobacco shop can furnish or i to enjoy a good ganio of billiards or pool, we will bo glad to have you drop In. ENSTACKEN the Furance Man' ElUIAPS tho hnndlest ninn with figures on Coos Day Is Irving Chandler. Irvine knows tlio digit ininlly from flguro 1 clear up he line tens, hundreds, thousands, millions, billions, trillions, cnindill Hciiip, qiilntllllons, soxtllllons, octil lions, nontllllons, decllllons, un.lc cllleiis and diiodeellllons. And It Is a fright to see him play with them juil llko babies. Knows whore each one belongs nnd how much It strrds Tor when placed besldo an other and n lot of curious things about them that few mortals havo eillier tlino or oven inclination to even think of. A day or two ago ho sprung one about "diiodeellllons." Someone lu the party asked what It was. Thou Irving waked up and went nt It. He expialied the duo buslnes this way: "According to' tho best estimates Cons Ray now has a population of 7.4LT.. "She uld tlio population Incrj.iso at till- rato of 7,125 per second for one full day of 21 hours It would hi 011,520,000. "If It kept up at that rate of '.n cnr.se for a year It would bo 21! I. K.I, 500, 000. 'Hut, bless you, gentlemen, this process Is altogether too slow. "Why. It woul require Just 1, OC7,CO!I,70;1,7G:1,117,:IOO, 71 2,59a, ceo years to gain one duodccilllou now residents. "Figure It out for yourselves." Hut nobody tried it. And the pro hahilltlcs are that Irving Chandler Is the only man on Coos Hay with anything like n speaking nciiunln tnnco with the big "duo." Also, wouldn't it be great If Coos Hay could got a hump on and grow llko that? smile-a-while A Coos Hay ninn cautiously admits that ho Is engaged. Hut n girl walks up and down Central avenue ring ing a bell. SMILE-A-WHILE YOU KNOW HIM There Is a man In our town Our goat for sure he's got, He dumps all sorts of rubbish on The vacant comer lot. WILSON KAUFMAN. SMILE-A-WHILE I l Jl There Is a man In our town Who helpB tho files to breed, Ho owns, a world of vacant lots And never cuts u weed. W. A. num. SMILE-A-WHILE ho looks Into tho Owl window to ndmlro the green moss nnd cat-tails that makes ono long for a vacation i trip over time ho goes down Central ' Avenue. However Frank didn't wenr blisters on his hands rowing the boatj out to the cat-tails and on an axo cutting tho stalks to mnko you, Gen tlo Header, think about vacations as ho would rather havo you spend your money for a plcturo niachlno than on somo tlrcsomo trip. smii.i:-a-wiiiiji: ; Hiiro Klgn. Col. Grimes nlnt sod inithln to Wilson Kaufman about his I now building for n long tlino and wo nro afraid wo will como down some morning to find the structurn sprung up over night without hav ing been forwarncd. When tho Col onel doesn't say nothing wo mean don't talk Its n sure sign. sMiiii:-A-viiiiji: - . i !' There Is u man In our town Who robs us of our mirth, He has un auto horn that sounds Like nothing else on earth. I. It. TOWER-. h.mim:-a-vhita: PKHSOXAIi MKXTIOX. How About It Finnic. Doc. Vaughn says that when It conies to crawfishing, Frank Ilorton has them all beat a mile. Our sporting editor Is taking his vacation or wo would have more details. SMILM-A-Wllllii; DO YOU KNOW HIM? A paradox is my friend Sam Pino With self prido lie's not blinded. The hat ho wears Is not No. 9 Hut he's never narrow minded. HMIIiK-A-WinijK Oh, place no trust In my frlcnu George CI. Or j on will sure regret It! He always says, "Leave that to me." And then ho will forget It. .smim-:-awiiim: lie couldn't bent a rug not ho! Work was beyond his powers; His hack was very weak, you seo. Iiut he'd play pool for hours. HMIIiK-A-WHILK No ninn wo'vo met Would llko 'to die, So don't forget To swat tho fly. Kay Olllvaut. HMIIiK-A-WHIIiK I L'KXTKAI AVKXUK SAYINGS . A cliango of only one letter turns vocation Into vacation, but you may also havo to change a $20 bill. SMHiK-A-WHILK After a prolonged debate tho Central Avenuo Conversation Club has finally decided that a scar on tho chin Justifies a man In wear ing whiskers. SMII.K-A-WHII-K You can steal money from a Coos Hay man and ho will forget It. Hut Commercial Xohh. Central Ave nuo's Commercial development con tinues and this week another now storo was added. Otis II. Wilson In stalled his now Jewelry nt ,78 Cen tral Avenue, being tho only Jewelry storo on our street. Success to you, Ote. KMILK-A-WHIIiK Welcomes Visitor. s. Chand ler, the original Central Avenuo booster, was In our midst yesterday. Ho 1ms been so busy trapping ground hogs since ho eliminated the polecnt colony on Coos River that ho has not hnd much tlino to dovoto to tho dairy, fruit raising or other agricultural lines. However ho has a crop of now buildings sprouting and another season may seo thorn blossoming forth on Central Ave, or Its environs. Hurrnli for Coos River 1)111! S.MH-K-A-WHILi: Near Accident. Ray Olllvant re ceived word this wk that Fred Weav er hnd a near nccldont at Hrowstor Valley. Fred saw a flno buck nnd remembered thnt It was ten days yet until open season attempted to steak tho buck out. Tho buck buck ed on such a proposition and what happened wo ain't been Informed. Neither havo wo received any ven ison. hmilk-a-whim: Farming Rood. Jim Kellond wont ovor to Cooston this wk to liolp stack the spring plowing on Hill Sulllvnn's ranch wlillo Hill was feeding Dos Straw, Jlh said tho crop would havo been good If Sullivan had lot so many weeds grow. Jim Is figuring as to whether Guy Cham bers' tobacco crop nlnt Just "weeds" not tho kind of "weeds" that Geno Crosthwalto and Jim dispense at Tho Smokohouso however. SMIMI-A-WHIMl New Poet. Don Lawyer snya Hint Al MeycrB has been nwful busy re cently wrltln poetry. Since Al hns not submitted a fow of his poems to tho Booster, wo nro naturally a let tlo mlto suspicious ns to whether sid pomes wero Intended by him for public perusal. Maybo It wrjs tho Poetic Muso that was responsible for that sad, absent look that arous ed our .worry about Al's condition Inst week. SMIIiK-A-WHlLK .Toyrldlng' Again. Dorsey Krelt zer, thanks to Doe Housoworth was Joyriding on our thoroughfnro this week. Just to show that ho Is strict ly up-to-date, ho hnd a lady chnf feur. Wo venturo a guess that Dorso would run from a Joyrldo If heard somebody say "eat." SMILH-A-WHILK 1 Sure After llltmcss. Iko- Chand ler, our hustling Insurance agent, Is i snld to havo about landed J. T. Har-j rlgan for a big policy. Ho slipped up nnd told Harrlgan tho other day that It was no telling when Henry Songstnckcn might start celebrating tho Kaiser's success nnd when Henry does, thoro might bo nn Injured Al ly, that Is If Henry encountered Jack. Irving said thnt ho thot that Jack, If ho would Just tnko a lesson In Russian military tnctlcs, would only need nn accident policy instead of a life policy, providing Harrlgan could Quickly put the rushing les- ison Into practice. HMILK-A-WHllilJ Ofkinls nro IIuhv. Our Estoomed Trustees, Cook nnd Kimball, havo been so busy with tho Coko-Tower Elovnted nnd Dennett Alley matters latoly that wo ain't boon nblo to got them to tnlk much olso and wo opine that they a Just n pining for a more Pine strcot discussion. Somo- how or othor wo nro beginning to figure that if they would only give Central Ave as much attention as they give Pino, wo would havo a rcg ulnr metropolis. In tho menntlmo, our public spirited cltizons led by John T. Harrlgan, A. T. Hnlnes, Ivy Condron nnd W. N. Ekblnd have done much more on Central Avenue that tho Town Doard with tholr numerous assistants havo dono with Pino street. SMILK-A-WHILK HUNDREDS OF Marshfield Housewives SAY ouu xi:v Imperial Flour is win "HST OX COOS HAY Huie joii tried u suck? Plume nn order tomorrow morning HAINES Gene Crosthwaite & Jim Kpllonrl Central Atcnuo, i FUKII M'CLKKS, Flr.st Assistant. W-H--H--H-H-,t,1'l,'l Ciett'ii Suspicious. Dad Welch Is beginning to git suspicious.-Tho oth er night ho figured out that when Charley, who Is back In Indiana, wrote that ho was being treated for something or other that Charley didn't mention no doc tor. Dad says that ho be lloves Charley must bo hav ing heart trouble and ho sus pects It won't take much longor for I HER to effect a cure. Charley is engineer of W. F. Minor's alpha betical lino, but ho nln't been .work ing at It for three months. SMILl'NA-WJIILK . .... Society Xuso. Oour Society edi tor called our attention this week to" tho fact that ever since last Junol Jay Doyle, has Just been stagln' It around with Art Peck. Art has told J our readers tho reason why ho Is, thrown Into Jay's company but Jay alnt told us why ho keeps Art's' companionship, If It wasn't for Un-i cle Sam being unalterably furnlnst , I ...! - 1.1 - ...l l tho answer. Needs Press Agent. Alllo Naff Informed Tho Doostor rcportor this week thnt The Iloostor Editor should remember that A. E. Noff Is a part ner of J. T. Harrlgan and entitled to got his nnmo In Tho Rooster Just as often as Harrlgan docs. Alllo al ways wuz u bashful cuss. SMILK-A-WHILE THE HUUMAUIXE (Entered in tho Short poem contest by Don Lawyer.) Dash. Glnsh. Crash Smash. Trash! HMILK-A-WIHLi: CORRECT Don't cuss your tough luck day and night, Don's feel of hope boreft. If you will, only do what's right You'll find you wont bo left. , Harry Nasburg. SMILE-A-WHILE HAVE YOU NOTICED Wo are ashamed to spring this tale, And yet we hato to duck It; A fellow gets a little palo Boforo ho kicks tho bucket. FRANK D. COHAN. SMILK-A-WIIILK Phono 52 Sum Window. Frank Cohan, our, enterprising druglst, has been pat ting himself on the back ever time) ' i It. DR. W. A. TOYE, DENTIST Hours 9 to 12; 1 to G. Room 201, Irving Itldg. Central Avenue. Marshfield 4 A Regular Vacation To visit our Soda Fountain Clean, invigorating and pleasant surroundings are what you find here. The thirst disappears in a jiffy and Oh! how you hate to break away. A Box of Stafford's Delicious Candy should be in the' lunch basket. Stafford's Sanitary Fountain Central Avenue Phono 8U-L JusL Arrived New Crop 1915 Tea , SWEET AND KLAVORY JAPAN TEA THE CHOICEST YOU HAVE EVER TASTED Only 60c Per Pound ALSO A COMPLETE LINE OK CHOICE l'RESII FRUITS AND GREEN VEGETAHLEH Plitiue your orders early. rftftK'S iRompt -v v mrnt it An vsrJL;.nrv ljrtWJLK.1 A ROGRESS1VE Phono 180. REHFELD'S fob!stthe Myrtle Wood Novelties FOR SOUVENIRS JEWEL HONES, NUT HOWLS, CARD TRAYS, NAPKIN RINGS, CANES, GLOVE AND HANDKERCHIEF HOXEH, TAI1LK8, CHESTS, CHAIRS, VENEER AND LUMHER IN THE ROUGH. Special Order Work u .Specialty Pliouo 275-J. iiliO Central Avenuo A N S ,0 O FILMS ALL THE SEASONABLE DELICACIES FOR THE TABLE Watermelons ' Coos County Plums Cantaloupes Coos River Peaches California Plums Fine Grapes California Peaches Roseburg Tomatoes PEACHES FOR CANNING We will have the Famous Ashland Crawford Peaches next Monday. Phone your orders in early NASBURG GROCERY Corner Central Avenue nnd Second Street. Get Insurance that Insures That's the kind I write. You take no chances ' E. I. CHANDLER COKE BUILDING I'lro Insurance, Life mid Accident IiiNiirniice, Surety Rondx, Ktc. Ed Meade, Kandy Nook. ARSOLUTELY FREE Stingy people uru not IioosKth, Tim kuockei Is simply a mult; Willi each box of I'ligsley's e.mcly, 1 give )(iu u purple peanut. Eil. Meade, C'rafer. Noble Theatre. Central Avenue. CENTRAL AVENUE MUSIC STORE PIANOS, ORGANS, VICTROLAS, RECORDS, SHEET MUSIC AND EVERYTHING IN THE MUSIC LINE We will be glad to arrange terms if you cannot pay all cash. Thomas Music Company Consolidation of Wiley II. Allen and W. It. HalnerfMuslc' fttEe! Oil Cvn tnil Avenue. ' PLAN TO TAKE rrr SUNDAY DINNER" AT TIIE Chandler Hotel The Hub of a Good Menu Central Avenue i A t OJ II 'llfl A .T tntr fl . H itW to M 'l Ml HA t (If i.i IT I ' el nil i'l 'I 1 I 'I i,.r. 1.M hi! J - " III.. I III !-. ' H f i1HI tyV'"'!' t i , . 1 mv-i ---, -ifflrnn-i-nTTr-f I miMMillillll I " ' I " "'','wy,l,,ffl1iroE