Image provided by: University of Oregon Libraries; Eugene, OR
About The Coos Bay times. (Marshfield, Or.) 1906-1957 | View Entire Issue (June 13, 1908)
' ll 5r"L 1( Mltlllll ii i MlH W MM WlllWMWtWtMli ii Ti mi ! ""'Rfe'DAiLY'cd'drBAY TIMES,' MARSHFIELD, OREGON, SAtiWDAr: jWiCT3, 1908. I. 'IS HI if F Ifl -Li 9 'r 7 m OPS BAY TIMES An Independent Republican news- jpaper published every evening except Sunday, and Weekly by IXlio Coos liny Times Publishing Co. ' Entered at the postoflbe at Marsh- i field, Oregon, for transmission through the malls as second class mall matter. M. C. JIALONEY. . .Editor nnd Pub. DAN E. MALONEY News Editor SUBSCRIPTION RATES. In Advance. DAILY. One Year 5.00 Six months $2.50 Less than G months per month .50 WEEKLY. SOne Year ?1.59 With the Toast and Tea The policy of the Coos Bay Times prill be Republican In politics, with Uho Independence of which President fRcosevelt is the leading exponent. Address All Communications to COOS BAY DAILY TIMES plarshfleld Oregon PLENTY OF ROOM. Once in a great while we run across an individual who is laboring under tho mistaken idea that we are liable to overdo the boosting business here in .Oregon. Let us take Lane county for example and see how true this s. Lane has an area of approximate ly 7,500 square miles. According to registration of voters, the county has about 30,000 population. On this basis wo have an average population Qf four people to the square mile of territory and this Includes fully 15,- 000 population bunched in Eugene and tho towns of the county, which practically leaves us 15,000 people occupying 7,500 squares, or an aver age of two people to every G40 acres of land In tho county. When we stop to contemplate such astounding figures as these, we are surprised that any one should have the nerve to declare that at our pres ent rate of progress wo are liable to overload Lane county with population. A stranger from Pennsylvania in lugene the other day remarked that ley had a county 20 by 40 miles In jzo in his state that has no great city in it, yet It has a larger popula tion than the whole state of Oregon. ;;Yes, there Is room in Oregon for millions of people room in Lane alone for a quarter of a million, or nearly ten times what we have now. There is no room, however, for pessimism among tho four people to tho square mile in Lane over the pos- BiDiiuy oi inciting room in wnicn to turn around, not during the life of ihe present generation, at any rate. fofcrfie only thing that should occasion any surprise among Lane county .people is that in a land of such vast ffand varied resources there should ejbut 30,000 people Instead of 150, 00. We shall make no mistake in our campaign of advertising if we doublo and treble our present popu lation, for with it will come new en terprises that will cause tho hum pt Industry to be heard in hundreds of, directions where silence now e'lB:nsand there will be correspond ing, Increaso In tho number of tillers offthe soil and the building of great- oScIties within our own little com monwealth. Eugene Register. X GOOD EVENING. X i Time past, Is gone, thou canst X. i not It recall; li i Time is, thou hast, improve i i that portion small: X X Time future is not and may X ii never be, X X Time present is the only time X X for thee. HORACE MANN. X 4 Just You. If I could have my dearest wish ful filled, And take my choice of all earth's treasures, too. And ask- from Heaven whatso'er I willed, I'd ask for you. No man I'd envy, neither low nor high, Nor King in castle old or palace new; I'd hold Golconda's mines less rich than I, If I had you. Toil and privation, poverty and care, Undaunted I'd defy, nor future woo; Having my wife, no jewels else I'd wear, If she were you. . Little I'd care how lovely she might be, How graced with every charm, how fond, how true; E'en though perfection, she'd be naught to me Were she not you. There is more charm for my true loving heart In everything you think, or say, or do, Than all the joys of heaven could e'er impart, Because it's you. ter by tho company he Jail. keeps In MEN OP THE HOUR It never pays to hurry onward when you are on the wrong road. When your worries harass you put them in a trunk and sit on the lid. Yes, dear, to be consistent a Colognial dame should use Cologne. When a girl refers to herself as an old maid, there is still hope for her. There are a good many harps in heaven that will not be called for The reason why women dou't try to understand things is because ther don't want to lose their Interest nor their quality of being interesting. jrji aesA raer ruts art &vsess ' tiffin Pf(t,rK? J I i'Between the 'old maid' of tho flf- Ues'Vand the bachelor woman of today yawns n vast gulf. The inero change of thc appellation Indicates something of tho bettered position of spinsters nowadays," remarks Gentlewoman. From 'which it may bo inferred that Shakespeare's query regarding names or .... .... was a trifle mvoious anu mat nowa days It makes a great deal of dlffer- encOj,whethcr a spluster Is called an oiutmaia" or a "uacueior gin." 71 Paul Morton's declaration that "the president has a temper" will go a great way toward verifying tho suspi cions of n number of wealthy male factors, undesirable cltlzeus nnd Jug glers of the short and ugly. n. teCho authorship of "Dlxio" has been attributed to thirty-seven authors, but fit's hats off and hooray for all of them fwhen tho band strikes upl $Tho Abruzzl Incident calls attention Bo tho oft demonstrated fact that no government is wlso enough to rcgu- .; ' r i . r f ..,, JUIO XHWI'W'S IOVO UUIIIWi 1 VA Tfnlnna innn Is ilniirrnrniifl. Rft la Jl -f ytt LUiuuiuuu, tuvj wiiftu itu i V tro vauts a squaro deal, but hist t t Vo needs la a round scoring, -7 ' T-1 T f k year Is of no uso to tho klad ,.men llko to marry Some amusing answers were found in the examination papers of the pupils of, the Marshfield schools and they lent a bit of cheer to the teach ers who had to work overtime in marking them. The humor is prob ably more striking and probably as ably more striking and probably has considered that all of the pupils were Intensely In earnest, being spurred on by the necessity of making a showing to be promoted and to have a good card to show to their parents. Some of the questions and answers were as follows: Geography (Second Grade); What direction is Coos River from the school house? Answer Straight up. Phjslology (Eighth Grade); Where is the alimentary canal? Answer In the southwestern part of Michigan. What Is tho seat of Intelligence? Answer The vermiform appen dix. History; What was the Lincoln-Douglas debate? Answer Lincoln-Douglass was a negro who said he was free; his owner said he was not. They had so much trouble over It that this was called the Lincoln-Douglas debate. Physiology (Fourth Grade); How many layers of skin are there? Answer Two, an under and a topper. Some men are born wise and others are born handsome. When luxuries become necessl tics, necessities often become n teniblo problem No man plays the fool ofteuei than a fool plas? many a man. Some liars are artists, but not all artists are liars. Some men seem to want a home so that they will have some place to stay away from. Getting their fortune told is simply a vicarious way some people have of gambling. The reason most of us arc poor Is because a select few have such an easy way of getting money. Nothing succeeds llko tho appear ance of success. Some Coos county men who think they are great politicians are only good jokes. Worry kills more people than work but it is a blamed sight easier way to die. Whenever an office in Coos county seeks the man, it doesn't have to hunt long. "Is your littlo girl old enough to be a companion to you?" "O, yes. She already plays a fair game of bridge." Gerald I want you to tell mo just what you think of me. Geraldlne Have you a telephone In your house? Sovoral ladles sat in their club a fow evenings ago discussing the vir tues of their husbands. "Mr. Smith," said ono of them, re forlng to her husband, "never drinks nnd never swears Indeed, ho has no bad habits." "Does ho never smoke?" somcono nsked. "Yes, ho likes his cigar just after ho has eaten a good meal. But," sho continued, "I supposo on an ncrngo ho doos not binoko moro than onco a month." "Woll," said Finuegan, "there's only wan tinio whin life ain't worth llin" "An' whin Is that?" asked Flan noi y. "Whin yo think it ain't." A mnn with a torpid liver couldn't see beauty with a mlcroscopo. Some Coos Bay men grumble six teen hours a day without seeming to be relieved. Mean of Him, ' ANTHONY HOPE. Anthony Hope, whoso novels are so popular with nil readers of fiction, had little success as a wilter until he produced the "Prisoner of Zenda," where upon he came into Immediate and lasting popularity. Mr. Hope is an ideal writer of serial stoiles, for he is a master of the art of suspense. This never has been more substantially erliled than in his splendid story "Sophy of ICi.ivoula." In this work he has returned to the field of romance, which made him famous. Thete is such suspense between the chapteis of reckless adven ture, court intrigue, conspiracy and hairbreadth escapes as to give the story that Inexplicable chaim which is the true condiment of romnnce. 'PK&m i r a 'SwhSx$1,Sk3MSk$! "She Is very beautiful." "Indeed!" "Yes. There is Just ono fault with her." "What Is It?" "She has been beautiful so long." Probably. "Working is doing what you don't like to do." "And doing what you llko Isn't work?" "S'poso so." "I SCO." "What?" "That must be why working people is sometimes called playing them." Would Know Later. "Is tho prisoner sane or Insano?" "I don't know yet" "But you havo examined him." "Yes." "And you are an expert?" "I am one of the best. But, you see, born sides are dickering with me for a w ltness, and I haven't found out yet which has tho moro money." Just Its Way. March has many moods, they say, E'er It takes Its leave Something different for each day Always up its sleeve. Wasn't Her Fortune. "Why don't you marry a millionaire, MrtinlV" "Haven't tho nervo to try, Edith." "Dlfl'ciunt with me." "Why?" "I haeu't tho face." Officers Safe. "To they have corporal punishment In ttie army?" "You hot they don't nnd you daseu'l punch tho lieutenant either. I tell you, U"'n olllceis has thlugs nbout theli way," Has the Ladies Guessing. "Do you know a good cauuudrum?" "JY." Wnat Is it?" "Vb Is a bucUelorr JL l C5. Killing by Electricity IMore Humane Than Hanging. By Dr. E. C. SPITZKA, Brain Specialist. $,5; HE method employed in electrocution is already gon- SHHT 'I erally well known. What is not so much a matter of . i i i-J :- it.. i. j.i.-i nrrv xvo-vnr JJUJJIXIIXL- JUIUWIUUU 13 IUU lUUb U1UL VXNXlJL XIIUJU. SIXTY TO SEVENTY SECONDS elapse from tho timo the prisoner enters tho room until ho is pro nounced dead. Moro than this, in every case with which I am familiar the pris oner slept soundly on the night previous, entered tho execution room calmly and often smiling, kept a decent silence or broke it only to murmur a prajjer or say a pleasant farewell, walked mostly unaided, seated himself in tho chair and watched with curiosity the strapping of his body thereto. Much has been said about life surviving the first contact, but IT DOES NOT SURVIVE. Tho current is now turned on when the signaling doctors soe that tho lungs hold the minimum amount of air, for after death what air was in the lungs rushes out and gives tho effect, to the layman, of a sigh, which, if any mucus is present, changes to a deceptive gurgle. In only two instances did I notico even any such sign of a respiratory effort. Death was ALWAYS PAINLESS AND INSTANTANEOUS, and4 consciousness had ceased in a flash. , , For tho purpose of comparison, by courtesy of Sheriff Brown, I attended five hangings in Moyamensing prison, and tho results, in my mind, are best expressed by that stanza in "Tho Ballad of Beading Gaol:" 'TIs sweet to dance to violins When life and lovo aro fair; To dance to lutes, to dance to flutes, Is beautiful and rare, Rut It Is not sweet with nimble feet J To dance upon tho air. THE PREPARATIONS WERE AS SPEEDY AS IN THE ELEC TROCUTIONS OF WHICH I HAVE SPOKEN, BUT AFTER THE DROP FELL THEN FOLLOWED A PERIOD OF STRUGGLING AGONY WHICH CAN BE BETTER IMAGINED THAN DESCRIBED. ' In nearly every instance tho heart continued to beat for thirteen minutes, and in only one that of Mok Kung, who really died of a sort of apoplexy was there no movement after tho drop. In all other cases there wero CONSCIOUS EFFORTS TO BREATHE, struggles of tho manacled hands to freo themselves and reach the strangling neck, bitter contortions of tho feet, tied though they were, in an endeavor to find support. Tho men literally "danced upon tho air." Theso struggles continued for a minute. Sometimes they kept up for a minute and a half. Often tho sight was such that SPECTA TORS FAINTED. FINALLY I PERFORMED AUTOPSIES ON THE BODIES OF FIVE MEN EXECUTED BY HANGING. THE BODIES WERE SENT TO THE JEFFERSON HOSPITAL, AND I HAD EVERY OPPORTUNITY FOR THOROUGH INVESTIGATION. IN NOT ONE CASE WAS THERE A BROKEN NECK, AND IN ALL DEATH HAD BEEN DIRECTLY DUE TO STRANGULATION. TOWN KNOCKERS How Coryvillc Got Rid of a Bunch of Unprogressivcs. THE YOUNG MEN 0RGANZED. Che me a man who has enemies. It is proof posltivo that he is not a dead one. An hour spent with a good lively dog Is worth two spout In morose lonollncss. All donkeys do not wear long ears. Some of them wear silk underclothes. A policeman should mako a fine electrician. Copper is a good conductor. And the Croaking Critics Couldn't Stand tho Ordeal of Initiation Into the Mysterious Order of the G. B.'s, A Story of Masks and Spades. There was something doing In Cory vllle. Tho G. B.'s wero getting busy. Who were tho G. B.'s? Oh, just fol low this little story nnd dud out! For many years Coryvlllo had had on hand an oversupply of citizens whoso chief activity had to do with knocking Hie town. These fellows wero but a small group, only four or fle, but they did harm. Half a dozen mag gots can spoil the best cheese ever made. So these town knockers, theso croaking critics, were slowly under mining tho good reputation of Cory vlllo by their Incessant chorus of defa mation. Nothing suited them. They opposed every movement for the good of the town. They croaked nnd knock ed nnd clamored and hammered when ever anybody suggested a street Im provement, a new building, the organ ization of, a business men's club or anything of the Bort. Finally the G. B.'s were organized. Of course they did not take tho knock ers' bunch Into their confidence. Thero was a reason and a good ono for not letting the knockers know. Tho G. B.'s wero organized iu secret. The initial meeting was held In an old abandoned schoolhousc half u mile out of town. Grips and passwords and other secret signs were ndopted. Even a mystic apron was devised, but It was not to be worn where aprons usually aro worn. It was to bo tied around tho head Junt below the eyes, thus serving ns a mfsk. Tho G. B.'s hadlpeen In existence only a month or so, Holding their meet ings every Friday night iu the old schoolhouse, when ouo of tho knockers discovered that such a society had been formed. Ho straightway notified his brother knockers. The group met In a grocery store. "Seems to bo something mighty mys terious about It," remarked tho chief knocker. "Yes; can't imagine what they're up to," said another. "Tho society seems to havo tliirty or forty members, and most of them are the younger element around town, young business men." "How did you find that out?" asked knocker No. 3. "Why, ono of tho members told me," replied the other. All of which was quite true. It was true also that this member had vio lated no rule of the G. B.'s. lie had been detailed to acquaint tho knevkers with these primary facts concerning the society. Immediately tho knocker In chief had expressed a desire to at tend a meeting. lie was cordially in vited along with his brother knockers. When the five town knockers filed Into tho old schoolhouse at the regular Friday night meeting they found a most startling assemblage. About for ty men, with long white apron-llko masks concealing their faces and reaching far below their shoulders, were standing around the walls of tho chamber, which contained no seats. Every fifth man carried a blazing torchlight. Many of the others carried picks, spades and shovels. The supreme sachem of tho G. B.'s advanced to tho group of visitors and asked them solemnly If they desired to be Initiated into tho order. They re plied that they did. How can a man knock unless ho Is on the inside? Tho chief knocker laughed scornfully as ho assented to the Initiation. "Tho ordeal is severe," said the su premo sachem, "but If you survive It you aro our brethren. Advance, G. B.'s!" Fifteen of the masked figures ad vanced, carrying stout cords. They quickly bound tho bands of the knock ers behind them and tied tho wholo group together with a rope. Then the torch bearers came forward, tho knock ers were led outside, the other G. B.'s followed, and tho entire party stopped on the open space back of tho school house. Without a word tho men with picks began to dig, the shovelers began to shovel, while tho torch bearers held their lights high above tho group. Aft er tho digging was well under way tho G. B.'s started up a dlrgellko song In doleful voices. Altogether it was an uncanny scene. "Wha-what aro you fellows up to anyhow?" gasped tho chief knocker. "Gentlemen, unmask," commanded tho supreme sachem. All the G. B.'s unmasked, revealing the fact that they were tho leading young men of Cory villc Then tho supremo sachem, who happened to own the grocery store in which tho knockers chiefly knocked, addressed tho candidates for initiation: "Wo are tho Grand Buryers. Wo aro digging your graves. Wo havo reach ed tho conclusion that a few first class funerals are needed in tho interest of Coryvllle, and wo have selected you gentlemen for the honor of furnishing tho raw material. For years you havo knocked and blocked every movement tor tho good of our town, and wo havo decided that Coryvllle can get along without you. Ilowever, we aro going to glvo you a chance. If you will promlso solemnly to boost and not to knock hereafter, you may tako your own timo and die natural deaths. But always remember tlt the Grand Bury ers havo tho tools and that we can dig." Coryvlllo has no knockers now. BURR JOYOH. fcf B' i n7 ' k ""i-niower must uo a goou m ' upush it aloug. No one should Judge Marshal Car W A.. j 1 ' 4 M i