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About Morning Oregonian. (Portland, Or.) 1861-1937 | View Entire Issue (June 27, 1910)
THE. HORNING OREGONIAN, MONDAY, JUNE 27, 1910. PORTLAND. OREGOS. inicrea at Fortlana. Oregon, jronJ-";" Second-Class Matter. - Subscription Rates Invariably In Advance. . (BI MAIL). Dally. Sunday Included, one year ?'? Dally. Sunday Included, six months jJ-j-J Dally, Sunday Included, three months... Dally, Sunday Included, one montn J Dally, without Sunday, one year J' Dally, without Sunday, six months -3 Dally, without Sunday, three months.... o-Ja Dally, without Sunday, one mown -go VVockly. one year JJ Eunday. one year - Sunday and trekly, one year. iiou tBy Carrier), gstly. Sunday Included, one year. ...I.. "-JO Dally, Sunday Included, one month...-. How to Remit Send Fostof flee money or der, express order or personal check on your ocal bank. Stamps, coin or currency are at the sender's risk. Give postofnca address In full. Including- county and state. Postage Rates 10 to 14 pages, 1 cent: 18 to 28 pages. 2 cents; 80 to0 pages, S cents; 40 to R pages. 4 cents. Foreign postage double rat. Eastern Business Office The S. C Becfc with Special Agency New York, rooms 43 Tribune building. Chicago, rooms 510 612 Tribune building. PORTLAND, SUNDAY. JUKE 26. 1910. , TAXES GROWING APACE. It is now costing more than a bil lion dollars a. year to run this great 'end glorious republic, whose seat is at Washington, D. C. 'It costs prodigious 1 Bums additional to run state and county and local governments. This means, taxation .that would stagger any people on earth. It has made the people of the United States look about them to find the cause of high cost of living. It is more extravagant waste than kingdom, monarchy or despotism would make. At the session of Congress just ended, appropriations reached a total of $1,054,000,000. Demands for grow ing Governmental bureaus which are Increasing in officialdom apace for pensions, Army and Navy,' rivers and" harbors and fo various local "pork barrel" purposes, make an enormous bill for the people to pay. Yet amid this increasing expense, foolish clamor goes up. Incited by harangues of demagogue politicians, for lower taxes on the necessaries of the people's con sumption. Large part of the expenditures is wasted through extravagant and sur plus officialdom. If the government were run on the economical principles of private business, the saving would certainly be very large. But, of course, that is impossible. Extravagance is one of the luxuries of "free" govern ment. Several days ago Senator Aldrlch asserted in the Senate that $300,000, 000 a year could be saved taxpayers of the Nation, if the National Govern ment could be administered on "busi ness principles." His remarks are thus quoted in the Congressional Rec ord: Mr. Aldrlch If the whole business of this country was turned over to a business man, to control and manage it by himself on busi ness principles, the expenditures of the Gov ernment could. In my opinion, be reduced 00.OOO,00O. Mr. Beveridge A year. Mr. Aldrlch I repeat that. That is my Judgment about it. I said that if I, as a business man, could take possession of this Government and run It as I would run my own private business, without any let or hindrance from any one, I believe that say J300.000.O00 could be saved: and I say It now. I realize that it is not feasible or possible. The Government of the United States Is not going to be turned over to any Individual. It cannot be turned over to any individual. - While this is no valid argument against "free" government, still it is a most important argument against wholesale extension of Governmental powers and functions and against Governmental owhership and opera tion of public utilities. . it serves as a warninir to the Tiublic that it must continually pay more ' and heavier taxes. And because the chief sources of revenue are duties and excises, this means that the people must ex pect to pay more into the treasury in taxes on articles they consume. The lower-tax promise of politicians who rail at the tariff can never" be ful filled. . and Idaho will look at the hosts of officials that have invaded their boun daries to "conserve" forests, minerals and streams, they will see a sample of the tax-eating appetite of the Gov- ernment. The more the officials con sume the more they crave. It is no exaggeration to say that; they will devour the value of the things they pretend to conserve, many times over. OUR UNCERTAIN NXCARAG UAN POLICY. Washington dispatches in yester day's Oregonian indicate a badly- mixed situation In Nicaragua. With the representative of Estrada, the rebel, demanding , interception of a vessel supposed to be carrying arms ' for the Government troops, and with Senator Stone openly stating that the revolution is backed by a syndicate, it . would seem to be a time for some first-class diplomacy, if this Govern ment wishes to emerge from the row without a legacy of trouble. The United States, as a rule, does not par ticipate in the family rows of its neighbors, until American interests ere threatened, and when the time appears ripe for intervention, the pro test is emphatic and decisive. Unfor tunately for our record in this respect. there has been too much dilly-dallying - in mis XNicaraguan conflict, i Our attitude throughout the con test has been that of an over-cautious party anxious to pick the winner. As a result of this halting policy, neither tne JNicaraguan government nor the revolutionists are satisfied. Regard less of where the banner of victory snau percn ra the end, we shall have accumulated a select assortment of enemies not at all conducive to the enlargement of our trade with Nlcar. agua. When the Nicaraguan govern ment, early m the present trouble, captured a couple of wandering Amer icans, vho had Joined the revolution ists to assist in overthrowing the government, the United States made a feeble protest. This protest was not loud enough to defer the execution of the two soldiers of fortune, who by tneir own admission, in letters after wards, made public, had earned . the ; death penalty. . It was of sufficient Importance, however, to Incur the hatred of a great many supporters of , tne iMuurdsuuu uovernmBnt. ine rev olutionists, failing to save their allies, were naturally more Incensed than the Is'icaraguans. That hone Is not vet ahandrmprl nf dragging the United States into the fight as an ally of the Estrada forces Is apparent from the demand of Dr.: Salvador Castrillo that Secretary Knox intercept, a steamer 'carrying arms to Madriz. .As the latter Is the head of the only Nicaraguan govern ment that Is recognized by- this coun- , try or by any other country, it would ' eeem. that he was within his rights, in buying arms wherever they were for sale, and in entering them at any point where he could dodge the revo lutionists.. The policy of "hands off" would be a good one for. the United States to follow. at this time -until our interests are more in jeopardy than at present. , , DEMOCRATS ADVISING REPUBLICANS. Oregon Democrats declare for polit ical purposes that the . Republican party is rushing headlong to" destruc-. tion," by refusing to follow headship of anti-assembly "leaders," who are try-, ing to "boss" the party with their near-Democratic Ideas. ' But suppose, now, the Republican party had adopted the headship of U'Ren, Brownell, Bourne and the rest. and was rushing into the contest this year under their guidance. What words could then depict the intense scorn of Democrats and their organs, towards a party that would acknowl edge such leaders? It wo.uld shock and disgust Demo crats that the party of Lincoln should exhibit such deficiency; that" an his toric party of grand and matchless achievements should stoop to the lit tleness of men of this character and caliber. The Democratic press would voico their scorn and their disgust daily. Its appeal to the people to re ject a party so guided or- le.d would put a tongue In the thunder's mouth. AllHhe exclamatory phrases against assembly, now emanating from Demo cratic sources, are but a feeble outcry compared with the demonstration that would be heaped upon the degenerate rival party, if it accepted the CRen-Bourne-Brownell leadership now proclaimed by them as the consum mate flower and fruit of political righteousness. But noWThat the Republican party will not accept nor follow these "lead ers," Democratic bosses make great furor over them, call them the Repub lican party's true patriots and match less prophets, and have adopted them as theirs friends and -allies in the enemy's camp. With them the Demo cratic bosses are co-operating for the purpose- of bringing the Democratic party to full power in Oregon. Democrats fear Republican assem bly will make it impossible for them to keep up their old game of preyrhg . upon Republican dissension. So. they have taken up the cry against an- an cient and honorable privilege of -free citizens that of assembly. But assembly will be held, never theless, and all genuine Republicans will be fully represented in it. RIVER BKEDGES AND TUNNEL . Several bridges, built high across the Willamette River, will serve the public better than - one tunnel under the stream and will cost less. This is the testimony of competent engi neers, and they ought to know. The serviceability of one tube would be similar to that of 'one bridge it would afford means of crossing the river at one place only, and the public ob viously wants more facilities than that. ' Besides, a tunnel would serve only one kind of traffic that of streetcars. High bridges, ' like that proposed at Broadway, several of them, are more desirable than one tube, and are bet ter within the resources of the city to pay for. There will be a tunnel under the river some day, perhaps several of them, but the time for them is not now. This is the time for building Broadway bridge. After that will com) some other project another bridge, or perhaps a tube. " ' FIRE PROTECTION TSt SCHOOLHOUSES. "Fireproof schoolhouses" Is a mouth-filling phrase that has found lodgment on the tongues of a con siderable number of persons who talk on the theoretical side ' of things rather ' than on the practical. No schoolhouses are really fireproof. They can be built so only by enor mous expenditure of money, which, is beyond the means of Portland and other cities to pay. , oub &liiuuiiiuuss can ana snouia be built so that they may be emptied of their human contents before fire shall endanger lives of children. Large corridors, wide and straight stairways -not too steep and frequent fire- drill practice will protect children from fire anJ stanrpede. All school houses in Portland and elsewhere In thjs country are built of wood, afcnd the modern ones are serviceable and safe. With proper precautions in building wooden structures and in training children there will be no fire catastrophe. If it were necessary to build school houses of so-called fireproof material, means would be found to construct; them that way. But -Portland has found wood serviceable, practical and safe through 60 years of experience. Nine-tenths of the. people live in wooden houses for the same reasons. Let, schoolhouses be 'built so that children can quickly rush out of them and there will be po danger. t BELITTIJ.VO OUR HARBOR. "The Milwaukee line wants to en ter Portland, but how will it get in?" says an excitable and unreliable local paper, addicted to the practice of cir culating misinformation . in lieu of facts and lucid argument,- against measures that d,o not meet its ap proval. ''It (the Milwaukee) main tains an Oriental steamship . service. How could It reach the' East Side water-front in such a way as to make connections with an Oriental liner?" continues, this organ of misrepre sentation. The natural Inference which a stranger would draw from . reading this sort of nonsense would be that Portland's harbor is limited to the few blocks, which border " the river along the main part of the city. Mr. Hill is something of a railroad build er, and, incidentally, is in the Oriental steamship business. . When he entered Seattle with his steamship line, he passed up all of the expensive sites in the heart of the city, and selected some cheap frontage at Smith's Cove, about four miles .out . of. the city proper. . ' Mr. Hill failed to find as much water in the channel at Smith's Cove as can be found on .either side of the river anywhere along the twenty-four miles of good frontage and dock sites that, lie between Portland proper and the mouth of the Willamette. He had no difficulty, however, in dredging out a dock site that ia ample for all . of his business, both local and transcon tinental.; Milwaukee will encounter no greater difficulty, when) It enters Portland, although, being almost ex clusively a Harriman line. It will find 'some .- very desirable sites already owned by that system, and available for business. Portland, with its great , mileage or water front on both sides of the river, with Willamette Slough reached by both rail and steam roads, and with Columbia Slough, similarly situated, has the finest possibilities for a great harbor that are possessed by any city on the Coast. . " Wot in a hundred years of the great est possible progress will this city be crowded for wharfage facilities. The present attempts to belittle our pres tige in this matter cannot possibly ac complish anything but harm, for such unwarranted criticism falls into the hands of strangers, who thus, get an entirely erroneous view of our facili ties and possibilities. Portland is too big a city to handle all of its water front business along a few blocks of frontage, and in the future, as in the past, it will meet any emergency that may arise, and will provide facilities for all ef the business, ocean or rail, that will come to the port. PUBLIC DOCKS FALLACIES. ,'The' people," we are, told, should decide whether Portland should" load its taxpayers with taxes, debt, poli ticians and agitators, for the purpose of establishing and maintaining pub lic docks. But where public docks are successful as In enlightened despot isms of Europe the people do not decide anything in regard to docks. Their rulers, acting upon advice of engineers, financiers and navigation experts, decide all matters. The peo ple's demagogues and labor agitators in America, who make civil admin istration and government projects profligate, wasteful and debt-ridden, have no Inning there. In Portland the people have no knowledge of detail or experience nor forecast of consequences, sufficient to determine this matter, although they are well informed and intelligent. Not even can the peqjIe determine the best . of several kinds of pavement. Yet pavement problems, are simple compared with dock problems. On the subject of pavements, however, only a few . have positive and accu rate information. ' It is no reproach to the people that they are not all specialists on all sub jects. But they are entitled to - the guidance of specialists on everything they undertake. The question of docks is not a proper one to decide by counting votes of a majority. A majority, of ballots, delivered .without experience or knowledge, may be a hindrance rather than a progressive step and probably will be. It cer tainly was not a progressive step when It authorized the city three years ago to enter the docks business. There is no more reason for- thA r-l t v .o enter the docks business than the streetcar business or the telephone business or the electric lighting busi ness. All these undertakings would be extravagant, wasteful and debt-building as parts of the city government. They would te manipulated by politi cal Charlatans and labor agitators. Resides, there is no need of public docks here. The big shipping is car ried on by large firms, that have their own wharves and that load and un load vessels promptly and at reason able rates. Is the city to take up this work for the shipping firms and make taxpayers foot the bills? Let this agitation for public docks cease and private capital will provide all the 1 new dockage facilities that the growing commerce will require. "KijEP HOLD OF THE LOAF. I' A suit filed recently before the court in Vancouver illustrates again the folly of aged parents in conveying their property to children for the consider ation' of care and maintenance during' the remainder of their lives. - The plaintiff In this suit is a woman of 87 years; the defendant is her son. In consideration of love," maintenance (including clothing) and such care and kindness as her age required during the remainder of her life she conveyed to. her son the property of which she was possessed. She has found, or so alleges, that the consideration that she gave was not held to be sufficient for the consideration that she sought and for which she stipulated and she has appealed to the court to cancel the bargain. It is, of course', probable that this aged woman thinks she see-. Intent to slight and neglect her which does not exist. The tendency of the ' aged in this direction is one of the strongest reasons why they should maintain their individual property rights as long as they have need of a home. On the other hand, it is practically certain that a man who will take over a deed to his mother's home In consideration of giving her tfte care and comfort which It is his duty, and should be a pleasure for him to bestow even were she penniless and homeless. Is not fo be trusted very far to discharge this duty when he has to be paid, with his mother's last property holdings, to do it. A former well-known citizen' of Portland, who died some years-ago, possessed of considerable property, to gether with a wife and half a dozen children, conveyed by will, with the nominal restrictions required by law, his entire property to his wife with this wholesome injunction: "Keep the loait under your, own arm, Mary; if the children 'need 'a slice, cut it off, not too thick, but be sure to hold on to the loaf." The wisdom of this advice is proven every time an aged parent parts with the family loaf under the promise that he or she shall be fed from It during life. The child, that exacts such, a surrender is not' to be trusted as an almoner, ' and ten chances to one the parent who. makes such surrender will live to regret it, for cause, real or fan cied, the one being not less grievous and hard . to bear than the other. Selfishness "is apt to rule in such mat ters,, and it should not be given the whiphand. The -man who will not treat his aged mother or father with filial consideration without a deed to his or her property will not do so when once the deed to the property is transferred to him. Than this, noth ing .Is more certain. r The New York Journal, of Com merce sarcastically mentions the re cent ship subsidy speech of Repre sentative Humphrey as "The finest example of boldness in stating in pos itive terms what is known not to be fact, and what could not by any pos sibility be fact." Mr. Humphrey de clared that" 90 per cent of our com merce is carried by a giant monopoly composed of foreign ships, between which there is not the slightest com petition. Humorously assuming that such a monopoly exists, the New York paper suggests as -a means of getting rid of it, that we "continue to make it cost American capital one-third more to build, own and operate ships than it costs the monopoly; exclude all but American-built and American manned ships from American regis- try, , and then tax our people enough to- raise a mightier marine and do the monopolizing ourselves." The wild statements of Mr. Humphrey have done nearly as much to discredit the 'cause of the subsidy people as has been done by Penton, the salaried liar of the subsidy seekers. With the river and harbor bill sighed by the President, all doubts about the opening of the Willamette River as a toll-free highway have been removed. The $300,000 appropriation, which has been a hobby of Represent ative Hawley, will relieve producers of the 50 cents per ton' lockage charge, which for so many years has been a burden on river traffic. The success of the measure-is -due to the persis tent efforts of the Willamette Valley citizens and newspapers, which for years have kept the matter continual ly before the public. . The Oregonian and other newspapers In the. Willam ette Valley were endeavoring to re move this lockage handicap for a quarter of a century before some ef the blatant newspapers now claiming credit for the achievement were in existence. . The people of the Valley are to be congratulated over the re sult of their long fight. " Jonathan Bourne" Is going to Illi nois to explain the beauties of "the Oregon system," including the plural ity primary and Statement One. The true Inwardness of this "system" will never be apparent to Jonathan until 1912, when It will most effectually work hla undoing. He never will be supported again by pacty loyalty. Nominated by a minority faction in Republican primaries, he was carried through the election against tremen dous opposition, by appeals to party loyalty. The same appeal repeated Would fail. Jonathan, two years hence, will learn the real beauties of plurality primaries and factional "knifing." A faction that wins a nomination by meager plurality vote cannot command the party support. In Jonathan's case it had successful support by merest chance. That will not happen again. . . William Huntley, the millionaire vice-president of the Exchange Na tional Bank of Spokane, and Emma V., -his wife, parents of 10. children, finding the companionship of each other no longer tolerable, have sep arated the wife seeking divorce and have effected an amicable adjustment of their large property rights. The cause of their marital disagreements is not stated. Let us hope that it 13 no more grave than that depicted in Will Carleton's verses, "Betsy and I are out," wherein the husband an nounced: I have no other woman. She had no other man. Only we've lived together As long as ever w-e can. The phrase "The Fool of the Fam ily," as applied to Oregon, since the state began all sorts- of foolish and outre experiments, was not an inven tion of The Oregonian, nor.- first ap plied by The Oregonian to this state. It appeared first In a prominent East ern Journal and was used ' to ' utter warning against adoption of URen's Oregon "system" elsewhere. Descrip tion was given of one .of the intermin able schedules, to be voted on by the whole population of; Oregon, few of whom could know what they ' were voting about. It was no miss, in the circumstances,' to designate? Oregon "The Fool of the Family." Astoria adyices report the cannery salmon pack to date about 30 per cent ahead of that of last year, while the cold storage pack Is about 60 per cent ahead. This ought to spread . pros perity among the lower river fisher men, for the raw material is bringing a good price, and most of the money falls into the hands of thrifty Indi viduals who do not spend it in the riotous, wasteful manner which was characteristic of the old type of fishermen. 'lt. is painful to see the distress of the local Democratic organ and some few others throughout the state, over the fear that assembly will divide the Republican party, ruin' its prospects and cause its defeat. Truly and in deed, their distress, caused by their solicitude for the welfare of the Re publican party, is a most pathetic spectacle. Adminlstratlbn of public wharves, under our political and industrial sys tem, would be most unsuitable to Portland, as It is to all American cities. The business would fall at once Into . the hands of political shysters and labor agitators. No need to tell the rest.- " The spectacle " of a business man and his wife fighting on a prominent street, Saturday afternoon, is of such infrequent happening in Portland that a large crowd of onlookers gath ered. Affairs of this nature woul better be settled before they begin.,- Something is added to the gaiety of politics by efforts of a certain or gan in Portland to parade" and ex ploit George Brownell as .a political reformer and as the paragon of politi cal righteousness Tor ahe present time. Great things have been done in Ore gon without assembly, but thecreatest are of a kind that would better have been done differently. Look at the kind of high officeholders. Seattle must build a fence, because Secretary Dickinson cays the colored troops will stay at Fort Lawton. They may be less . boisterous after the Fourth. " ' - Now If the black should "lick" the white and take the bruising cham pionship, another advance-in progress would be scored for the white race. v Circuit- Court Judges begin a two months' vacation next week. Holding court means trying times during hot weather. ' , Daniel Sully's life-work was , to amuse the world, and he succeeded. Outside those bounds he was a failure. Royal Anne cherries at Creswell measure 11 to the foot. They are just ordinary cherries, too. ' The Sixty-first was a billion-dollar Congress; but this Is a billion-dollar country. " "She story of the fire oiy the packet boat reads like old times on the Mis sissippi. That was a Republican war vote from, good old Polk, Saturday. .- Hawley ' lost the Siletz game on points, . - ' - DEMOCRATS PLAY "BUNCO GAME" Say They Fear for Republican Welfare "When the, Truth Is Reverse. Albany Citizen. Conservation Is ;a popular topic In these days. Like the word ."strenuous," It has taken a peculiar hold upon the Amer ican people and is applied to almost every activity of life. In this connection it may be remarked that the Democrats of Oregon have some special interests to conserve. Else why should they be so fearful of Republican success (or failnre, as they profess to see it)? ETjery Democratic leader in the state seems to be in moTtal fear that the Republicans, ere making asses of themselves. . Democratic 'brethren, we ' Republicans 'are prone to mistrust you. We fear that your solicitude for our welfare Is not wholly of the altruistic sort. We fear that you fear that if we get together we will succeed in electing a Republican Governor and Republican officials gen erally. We believe you are playing to the grandstand. We think you are wholly interested in the conservation of Democratic interests. "A "Satrare Deal" Assembly. - Roseburg Leader. Republicans throughout the state are becoming thoroughly alive to the. situation and the assemby proposition is proving its "success and forecasting victory to the party in November. There has been but one contention so far, and the unexpected happened. At Oregon City, U'Ren presented himself for admission by proxy and was de nied. He remonstrated without result and retired. He returned later and stated that the assembly was right in denying proxies, as he did not believe they were proper. He then thanked the assembly for permitting him' to back down from his former position. This incident proves that it is the in tention of the 'Republicans of Oregon to give the people of the state a "square deal," and that U'Ren has to admit the assembly to be 'the' proper thing. Democrats aa Republican Dictators. Harrisburg Bulletin. The assembly isn't denounced by any I Republicans around, here so far as we have heard. The approval of it by the conservative element of that party Is be coming more evident daily. It seems that a party's own , affairs should be governed within that party yet In the Instance of the proposed assembly the Democratic leaders have been the dicta tors. Surely the Republicans are not seeking to prevent an assembly of any opposing party, class or clique. If the Prohibitionists have a right to meet and suggest a list of candidates for the vari ous state offices, which they have al ready done, we can't see the wrong in any other party doing the same thing. Southern Linn County is in favor of an assembly for any party' that chooses to hold one, so long as it. does not conflict with the laws of the state regarding the primaries. '. Browaell's Political "Lore." ' Eugene Register. The Register has always 'been fully aware of Brownell's "love and sympathy" for the people. We recall the time he acted as chairman of the Congressional Convention in Eugene, when he an nounced facetiously,- "We will now pro ceed according to programme," where upon he pulled a "programme" from his pocket and proceeded as announced. Oh,-yes. George always had great sym pathy for the people he could use to forward his own political ambition. He Is now working the old game on a new tack down in Clackamas County. Mr. Paget's Mistake. - Dalles Optimist. Mr. B. Lee Paget seeks to be the mouthpiece of the Prohibitionists, and in a communication to The Oregonian avers that it was necessary for his party to hold a convention, as it Is not a party according to the terms of the direct primary law. Mr. Paget may be a good prohl and a good lawyer, but he seems to forget that there Is a provision in the law for nominating by petition. All sorts of cranks seem to think that It it only the Republicans who cannot hold a convention. Prohibition Fallacy. The Dalles Optimist. One thing is certain, and that is that statewide prohibition in Oregon can never be enforced any better than It has been in Maine and other prohibition states. In the City of Portland there will be more harm done by blind pigs and clubs that will spring up. that? Is now done by the saloons, far more. A prohibition law never has been enforced In a large city and never will or can be. The Optimist still believes in trie partial sanity of the peo ple of Oregon, and we do not look for the prohis to galn their ends at ,the coming election. Reuniting; Republican Party. Gervais Star. The assembly movement Is one of abso lute merit and as such commands atten tion and the result will be unquestionably for success. To reunite the Republican party is possible but this cannot be brought about so long as Republicans listen to believe In- doctrines promulgated by the Democratic press and " opposite party follower's. The only way to reunite the party is to reunite and keep re united. ' One Comfort, at Least. The Dalles Optimist. The "faithful" have not much to expect from Jonathan. He has filled the two best offices at his disposal by appointing two unknowns who have scarcely be come citizens of the state, one as Register of .the Land Office at Portland and one ae Postmaster of the same city. But he could not land Hafer. There is some satisfaction in that. i, Kermlt Had His Fun. New York Sun. The guests who left the reception carried with them little boxes of wed ding oeJte marked "A. R." in a gold monogram. The crowd outside waited patiently until 6:30, when Kermit raised a cheer by slipping out to tie a white satin slipper to an automobile whlch drove up to the door. Then Mrs. Long worth came out carrying a double hand ful of rice and ordered a butler who carried a bowl of telltale grain to scat ter it liberally over the machine. Next the bridesmaids, with plenty of rice ammunition, lined up at the door. The young men of the party scrambled out on the roof of the porch and showered the bridesmaids wii"H flowers, holding their rice fire In reserve. Canard on the Face of It. Springfield. Union. We admit that we had great confi dence In the Associated Press, but that was before it sent out the statement that Roosevelt would be silent for two months after his arrival in this coun try. He Cant. Philadelphia Inquirer. Mrs. Theodore Roosevelt, Jr.'s, wedding hat Is said to have cost 3()0. Must have made young Teddy seriously question his ability to support his wife In the style to which sne has been accustomed. The World Moves.' Boston Trairscript." -In times gone by when we'd convey A task's sheer hopelessness, we'd say, "Ton can't do that no use to try Not any more than you can fly." But that old phrase we've left rehlnd. It's useless now; we've got to find Some new comparison, by Jlnf?; For man-flight Is a common thing. Boston Transcript. GREAT ORATOR OF THE OBVIOUS A Little Study of the Colonel aa aa ' Original Thinker. Brooklyn Eagle. The difference between sentiment and sentimentality Is made the subject of a letter by Mr. Roosevelt to the London Times. The difference between sense and sensibility aroused the con sideration of Jane Austen. Mr. Roose velt resolutely refused to change sen timentality, of which he is the relent less foe, for sentiment, to which he declares he Is profoundly attached. Years ago, other folk. Dan Bryant, the minstrel, among them, learnedly descanted on the distinction between a horse chestnut and a chestnut horse. These controversies do not occur among; lexicographers. To them the meanings of words are known and the shades of meaning are apparent. The controversies abound among those .who' are less lexicographers in learning and more than lexicographers in impor tance. Those who read and buy books and pamphlets outnumber those who merely discuss the words, or the spell ings, or the meanings of words. In pamphlets . and in books. One never hears of philologists wrangling over definitions or orthography pronuncia tion is their battleground but among those not philologists the disputes con cerning what words signify or how words should be spelled are incessant. Mr. .Roosevelt's letter to the London Times will arouse among philologists merely a smile, but it has already be come the cause of discussion around tea tables and In -family circles, wire re the rule of the majority in petticoats overcomes the adverse vote and the larger knowledge of the minority In trousers. We have no doubt that Mr. Roosevelt's letter will make him the Idol and the topic of "everyone who thinks with his heart" everywhere, , Does the reader ask what's the use? Friend, the use Is the usableness. Any matter that can stir words, to the ex clusion of thought. In the domestic ex change, is not to be despised by the multipliers of words, and cannot be Ignored by the neutralized preferers cf thought. Mr. Roosevelt has made him self solid with such as will not argue, when "they feel they are right," and as can "cry," when they are out argued. Besides, there was a "man of sentiment" known to Sheridan, though forgotten by Mr. Roosevelt. He was named. Joseph Surface. His devo tion to "sentiment" was verbally ex treme. It excited the admiration of Sir Peter Teazle at first. The disillu sion, followed by alienation, came after ward. Mr.- Roosevelt's letter to the Times "was written within rifleshot of the theater in which Sheridan devel oped Joseph Surface and the Teazles, but with sublime unconsciousness of the analogy, our ex-President, who is tne orator of the obvious, went rlsrht on his trend of truism as if he had hit off an absolutely novel proposi tion. This is Mr. Roosevelt's (treat advan tage: Nothing that ever has been said prevents him from saying it himself. To him It is as never said till he says it. To him it owes its originality. ' Shakes peare, Sheridan, Milton and any prior otners -are nil. Kuch an idea as indors ing them he would scorn. Such a charge as parrotting them he would denounce with the short and uirlv ward. citner to oe accused of unorleinallty or of copying would be sacrilege,' not to say muckraking. Nothing that ever nas Deen heretofore said and nothing mat may nerearter be said can bn re garded as a bar by Mr. Roosevelt on saying it or as at all worthy of atten tion until ne says it or may yet say It. Philip James Bailey and Martin Farquhar . Tupper had this same blessed fecundity of reassimllation and this same happy self-satlsfactoriness of unconscious redlgestlon, but Mr. Roose velt excels them in both. a. The greatest wealth of mind Mr. Roosevelt possesses resides In his utter destitution of humor. For, wealth to reside in destitution Is difficult, but in this instance it Is as actual as the fact that, given the same recipe and the same Ingredients, some cooks will fall to Impart to prepared food the same flavor that other cooks do. It is not in tne rirst set of cooks to An an The second set cannot avoid doing. so. The statesman with humor and knowl edge makes other happy. The states man without humor can treat all knowledge as exclusively his own and can rate all mankind as his kinder garten to be instructed by him, at first hand, out of all knowledge, which Is also his at first hand. The statesman with the flavor of humor can ' make others happy. The statesman without It Is in himself the subject of a self made happiness that Is ineffably radi ant ana mcomparaDiy Kooseveltlan. Besides which every Enarlish dlctfnn ary in the world makes sentiment on sentimentality synonymous; hut our xneoaore is a law, as well as a diction ary unto himself. Just as he was a whole Federal Constitution unto and by himself for over seven eventful years. We never had his like; none but himself can be his parallel. And there are tnose wno say we are to have him again. BRITISHERS "SLOPPINO OVER" Funeral Anti-Climax . of Irish Digni taries and Irish Terrier. ' New York Post. The depths of antl-cllmax were onunderl by the London correspondent of the Mon treal bxar in' his account of King Ed ward's funeral. Having enumerated the British dignitaries who followed the coffin, he feels stirred to a bit of politi cal philosophizing: Looking at this wonderful list of names, do you observe how many are Irish, from Roberts and Kitchener at the head of the army, downwards? Even King Edward's mournful little terrier was Irish. Here is justification - enough for the charge that It takes an Englishman to go the limits of sentimentality once he gets started. The incident of the 'little Irish terrier was pretty and pathetic, but the floods of emotional gush it has- let loose In the United Kingdom and the do minions beyond the sea, have more than drowned all the beauty and all the pathos out of the Incident. The Times has printed letters about the little Irish ter rier that were fairly deluged with tears. It was not loyalty: it was hysterics. For all their exurberance one can hardly Imagine Frenchmen "slopping over" in this altogether absurd fashion. "Vandalism of the Laundry. New Tork Herald. A fortune awaits some genius who will invent a new method of marking clothes sent to the laundry a washable, remova ble tag, or something of the sort. The present system is unsightly and ruinous. Nothing is spared, from the daintiest dolly to the kitchen towel. In" fact, the finest fabrics do not escape the hiero glyphics of the marker's stencil, pencil, or whatever device ho uses m this deco rative work. The Dingy Kitchen. Columbus Journ al. It Is a poor home that has a dark and dingy kitchen. Food absorbs not only the material conditions that surround It, but the spiritual conditions as well. A gloomy kitchen makes a gloomy heart, and a gloomy heart never can make a pudding or a pie worth eating. It Is said that some women who are trying to re form the world have dingy kitchens. They will never do it. And Both Were on Time, Too, Everybody's Magazine. "What member of the class can men tion one memorable date in Roman his tory?" the teacher asked. "Antony's with Cleopatra," ventured one of the boya, LIFE'S SUNNY SIDE Little Mildred is In her first term at school where she gets reports "as to her standing marked on a decimal scale. One hundred is perfect and 60 is pretty serious. The other night while saying her evening prayers, her spirits, always high, were actually irrepressible, and her petition was "punctuated with snickers and smothered giggles." - ' "Do you think the Lord will like that- kind of a prayer?" asked her mother, reproachfully. "Nope," returned Mildred glibly. Not much! He'll gimme 'bout 60 on that!" Woman's Home Companion. A scientist attached to one of -Uncle Sam's bureaus at Washington found himself, at, a dinner given by a Federal official, next to a vivacious young woman from the West, who. being aware of the attainments of her dis tinguished companion, endeavored to "draw him out" with respect to his views concerning certain recent achievements in bis line. After a bit, the professor was" in duced, somewhat against his will, to talk "shop," and Incidentally ex- , plained very carefully and elaborately to the young person an experiment tending to show that life can be pro duced in sterilized bouillon by theac tion of radium. . The professor warmed up a bit. "Think of it!" he exclaimed. "What a train of thought Is aroused by this ex periment! Why, it may have happened in this world of ours millions of years ago!" "Yes, Indeed," assented the yrffeng lady, visibly impressed, but a little In credulous. "Of course I understand that there may have been radium the'n. but where did they get the beef tea?" The late John J. Ingalls, United States Senator from Kansas, once told with great glee the story of a joke at his own expense, the humor of which, however, he enjoyed as keenly as if he had not been the victim of it. "I went one evening," said. Mr. In galls, "to make a political speech in a small town. I presume the people thought I would have difficulty in fill ing an hour; at any rate, they called upon the village choir to assist. "I trust that the hymns were selected before my arrival, but of that I cannot be sure. I know that before the talk the choir sang, "What Shall the Har vest Ber and after It, 'Nothing v but Leaves.' " Youth's Companion. Rear-Admiral Purnell.F. Harrington. TJ. S. N., retired, tells a story which would Indicate that Theodore Roose velt was himself convinced of the fact that had there never been a war be tween the United States and Spain the Colonel of the Rough Riders would never have been President of the United States. Admiral Harrington., then a commahder, was in command of the monitors Terror and Puritan in the Spanish war, and it was after he be came va Rear-Admiral several years later, and after Mr. Roosevelt became President, that the conversation that follows occurred. "I was the commandant of the Nor folk navy yard." said Admiral Harring ton, "when President Roosevelt visited the yard. I, of course,, escorted the President, and in the course of the tour he noticed that there werS' a number of battleships In the yard. "'What ships are those, Admiral T the President asked. I told him- the names, and then remarked: " 'Had we had those ships In 1897. Mr. President, there never would have been any war with Spain." "That is very true,' replied Presi dent Roosevelt, 'and had we had them I would not Be here today. " Wash ington Post. DILEMMA OF BER5ARO SHAW Ln-w Requires Him to Ask. Hla Wife What She Won't Answer. Springfield Republican. George Bernard Shaw, in the charac ter of the plutocratic Socialist, has just become the hero of one of the most amus ing of all his comedies. The intricacies of the Income tax provide the plot. The law regards the Income of a married woman as part of her husband's, income and requires him to give full particulars concerning it. But Mr. Shaw has no means' of ascertaining his wife's Income, except by asking her. She, being a con sistent and resolute euffragette, refuses. The law gives him no means of com pelling her. Therefore, all ha can do la to report to. the Income Tax Commis sioners his wife's name and address and leave it to them to ascertain the amount of her income. That they can do. But, having done so, they are forbidden by law to impart the information to him. Yet if he does not get that information somehow he may be sent to prison. And there is no use in his appealing to his wife to give him- the information to save him from jail, because there is nothing In which a suffragette glories more than Imprisonment for principle's Bake; and If a suffragette gladly goes to Ja'I her self, she will the more gladly see her husband sent thither. Obviously, O. B. S. is in an awkward fix, out of which, however, we shall hope to see proceed a play in the best Shavian style. . Polndexter's Big Job. "Vancouver Independent. Poindexter has planned a big Job. Be sides endeavoring to defeat Wilson, Burke, Ashton and Humphries for the nomination of United States Senator, he proposes to defeat Congressmen Mc Credla and Humphreys for re-election this Fall and? is laying the ropes to get Senator Jones later on. This looks lute quite a big Job for one lone Congressman. Jones, MoCredie and Humphreys all have friends in the State of Washington who are not apt to assist Mr. Poindexter In his ambition to eliminate these men and promote himself to the head of the Con gressional delegation from this state. It would be a nice thing to be. elected. United States Senator and at the same time be able to name all the Congress men and other Senators. This is a Job equal to any that Aldrlch would under take and even Joe Cannon has never at tempted it. As Viewed In Chicago. Chicago Record-Herald. "A Brooklyn judge says all women are not angels." 'He ought to study English composi tion." "What has English composition got to do with It?" "The Judge evidently meant to say that not all women are angels. In this I agree with him. I have two ex-wives who are still living." .- "Do you mean still living or living still?" "No, I mean living yet." Amending; the Sngecstlon. Newberg Graphic. The Woodburn Independent 'fays the Republican state assembly should "sug gest" at least two to succeed Sesator Bomrne. The Independent evidently . has a higher opinion of our Jonathan's abili ties as a statesman than 6eems current. If it is merely a case of filling the vacancy some would be cruel enough to suggest that the mere choice of ialf a man, would be sufficient. Only Two Viewpoints. Philadelphia North American. Here in the United States there Is no middle ground "6n which men . stand I viewing Theodore Roosevelt. Dispas sionate impartiality disappears as soon as his name is mentioned. E'ery cit izen is fervently for him or jrofanely against him.