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About Morning Oregonian. (Portland, Or.) 1861-1937 | View Entire Issue (Jan. 4, 1909)
THE MORNING OR EG OMAN, MONDAY, JANUARY 4, 1909. Off (&u$(mm 1-OKTLAND. OREGON. Entered at Portland, Oregon. Poatofflcs as Second-Class Matter. Subscription Unlet Invariably to Adraoco. (By Mail rallv. Sunday Includi-u. on year. lai;y. Sunday Included, six months.... J ;J I'ally. Sunday Included, three mor.tns : Iailv, hunuay inciuatru. ou . . rUy. without Sunday, oie year. I-al!y. without Sunday, six months.... I.iily, without Sunday, three raontm. I'ally. without Sunday, on, month Veeiily. one year Bunt!ay, ono year " Sunday and Weekly, one year too i.2i 1.7S .60 1.50 2 50 S.iO nailv. Sunday lneiuV1. ono year...... 1 o lal!v Sunday included, one montn How to Keniit "end postof rice "ney ercr. express order or personal che. on our local bank. Stamp., com or u"enS are at ffci .cnier- rl.k. Ulve po.tofftce ad dress In lull, including county and state. Postage Kates 10 to H paC'a. 1 " to 2 ps. i r.-ois; -0 to 4 pages. 1 cents. il to " pages. cents. for.fa po.tags double rat. Es.tern lia-in, OftV-The S. r Beck- l Tribune bniluins. CMcago. rooma 610-513 Trfbuiws bulWtng FOKTXA-NH. MONDAY. JANUARY 4. 1900. PHl-DENCE AND TRUTH. The population neither of Portland, nor of Seattle, nor of any other city. Is to bo Increased or made actually greater bv persistent exaggeration. Such exaggeration Is always harmful; for It leads to extravagance In many ways; and the time soon comes when the actual truth Is known, bringing confusion and disappointment with it. If there are anv better Indicia of a city's population than its annual school census, carefully taken for the purposo of getting largest possible benefit of the school fund, and its registration of voters for elections of local. Mate and National importance, one would like to know what they are. , The Oregonian itself Is a boomer and there is no business that more strongly desires a big city. But It wants no misrepresentations; it wants truth now, and no disappointments hereafter. Besides nnd this is the principal reason why The Oregonian has made its present protestsuch exaggerations are U5"d os a basis ioT support of all kinds of municipal ex travagance not only In current ad ministration. Including Increase of the number and pay of officials, but for the burdening of the property of the city with a tremendous and excessive bonded debt. Where is prudence in this matter? Here, as always, on the side of truth, not of exaggeration. We shall not make the population and wealth of Portland actually great er by extravagant "claims," butf we shall by such policy multiply official expenses beyond needs, and give prod igality the opportunity it seeks. Offi cials of all departments are clamoring for "more money," on the basis or claim of a larger city than we have. Protest, on the side of prudence, of truth and of economy is in order. Truth is truth, and from any point of view preferable always to error. Since The Oregonian's principal ob ject Is to check the effort for official waste and increase of the public debt, it knows the effort will obtain public appreciation and recognition, too, now or hereafter. Two cities will not get ahead by "claiming" and lying against each other. Neither of them will. Port land and Seattle seem to be making bogles of each other. Here is the Seattle Time of Friday last making claim for Its city of a population of 276.442. At the same time it tells us that the school population is 26,000. But Portland's school population ex ceeds 34,000. We are told, further, that Seattle's rroperty valuation is now J175.000.000. But that of Port land Is J215.00d.000. Does popula tion bear any relation to either of these comparisons? Even though Seattle does make an extravagant esti mate of her population. Is that any good reason why Portland should do the same? Reason and sense and Judgment and truth should still be factors in human affairs. And administration of publio affairs should be business administra tion, on a reasonable basis. This city and county should not (Jouhle up their debt, nor double the number of their officials and their salaries, on the ba sis of an imaginary population. Nor tan any sensible owner of property think so. RECORD YEAR IN" Bl ILIIXG. Portland's building record for the year Just closed makes a remarkable showing. The orlklal figures place the number of permits Issued at 4b51, with a total valuation of $10,411,951. This la an average of more than J21. 4 00 for every day In the year. De spite the magnitude of the figures, they do not fully represent the amount expended for building purposes In this city last year. Plumbing, plastering, heating, and other finishing contracts were very few in number, and the aggregate expenditure for this class of work would at a conservative es timate bring the total up to more than $12,000,000 for the year. When It is considered that Portland entered the year 1908 under the financial cloud which enveloped the entire country in tho closing months of 1907, the full significance of this enormous growth can bo better understood. The panic of 1007 came so sud denly that building undertakings al ready pianned and financed were suf ficient In number and volume to hold the permits up to very satisfactory figures until well Into 190S. The worst of the slump was not over until April, when the decrease as compared with April, 191 7. was more than $540, 000, and It was July before the pendu lum swung the other way, and an in crease Instead cf a decrease was no ticeable. Comparison of the totals for the entire 12 months of 1D0S with tho 12 months of 1907 is. of course, accu rate and fair, but It Is easier to un derstand the phenomenal growth of the city at the present time by taking the figures of the first six months of 1907 and the last six months of 190S. The six mcnths from January to June inclusive. In 1907 showed the highest valuation of permits ever is sued in this city in six months, the total being 204 3 permits with a valua tion of $3,695,711. This figure was reached during the crest of the wave of prosperity which followed the Lewis and Clark fair; but so complete has been Portland's recovery from the panic of 1907 that the closing s't months of 1908 showed totals of 22.1 permits for $5,624,341. The reason for so slight a decrease in the total value, while there was an Increase in the number of permits, was the heavy decline in the price of building mater ials and labor, as compared with the prices ruling while the boom was on in the first half of 1907: The large number of business struc tures for which permits were Issued In 1903. and which are now in various stages of completion, are quite natur ally the first to catch the eye of the newcomer and Impress him with the growth of the city; but a slight study of the details of the more than J 10, 000.000 worth of permits Issued last year presents in the dwelling-house permits an even more striking evi dence of the city's growth. These permits were 2543 in number, and the valuation was $4,923,150, an average of a fraction less than $2000 each. Dwellings costing an average of $2000 each are not huddled close together, but, if they had been, and the average bad been & new dwelllngfor every fifty foot lot, these new dwellings last year would have covered 318 city blocks. It is extremely doubtful that they aver aged five dwolllngs to the block, but at that figure more than "500 blocks of new territory were rdded to the "built up" portion of the city. These figures do not Include the big building move on the peninsula at and below St. John, at Linnton and other suburbs of Portland. The record year of 190 8 began under adverse circum stances. The new year begins with the t flattering outlook that we have ever enjoyed: and, with the large amount of construction iwork al ready planned and financed. It Is practically a certainty that 1909 will excel all previous records in build ing operatl-ns to an even greater ex tent than 1908 distanced all former efforts. INEFFICIENT AND IDLE MKS. It la seldom. In a new country like the Pacific Northwest, that men who want to work have excuse for being "out of a Job" for any length of time. But forecast Is necessary, and men of forecast can usually assure themselves of continuous employment. If men would not leave one place till assured of another, few would ever find it necessary to be Idle. The wise man, who must live by his labor, does not cut himself off from his employment and take the chance of getting some thing else when he may want it. Men of families, as a rule, do not do this. They realize they must do their best to keep the children fed and clothed. So it is, as Francis Bacon said, that he who has wife and children has given hostages to fortune. A member of the Society for Im proving the Condition of the Poor, in the City of New York, recently esti mated the homeless men of the city at 30,000. But of these, he says only a small proportion would work, if they had the opportunity. The great majority belong to the vagrant class. So In Detroit, when 2500 men went to the City Hall and asked the Alder men to do something for them. Work on a canal enterprise was offered, but only a few "showed up," most of whom insisted on being bosses and timekeepers, and declined to use the spade. There are able-bodied men begging In Portland today, most of whom are of the shiftless, vagrant, non-working class. A prosperous country always offers opportunities for work, and thi3 country is highly prosperous. The problem is how to get men to do it men who will do it intelligently and well, and stick to it. It is a difficulty encountered by every employer. Trust worthy and efficient men need not be Idle. For all such there is plenty of work and always will be. As for the Inefficient and untrustworthy, they merely obstruct the work of the em ployer. THE MEAD-COMROVK DEAL. We have from Olyropia some de tails of the famous understanding now clearly a misunderstanding as to Mate patronage between Governor Mead and Governor-elect Cosgrove; but we shall probably have to worry along without the facts until a state ment Is forthcoming from Paso Ro bles. Governor Head, It eeems, made a deal with his Invalid successor by which he (Mead) was to name cer tain Cosgrove partisans to office, but when the time came for the present Incumbent to "deliver the goods," he had a few of his owu friends to care for, and ha decided that Cosgrove's friends might wait It is all no great matter except as' the little controversy throws light on a most extraordinary situation In Washington affairs. Mead was Gov ernor, and was beaten for renomina tion and re-election by Cosgrove; then Cosgrove was taken sick, and went to California apparently in a dying condition. Mead, supposing that as Incumbent he would hold on indefinitely, and desiring that Cos grove enter into no plan or scheme to turn over the office to Lieutenant Governor Hay, arranged to placate the Cosgrove clement by carrying out cer tain Cosgrove plans. But now, alas! Cosgrove Is getting well, or at least well enough to assume office at or near the time his term of office is to begin, and Mead's enthusiastic pur pose to help along Cosgrove's ends grows cold as the prospect of his filling Cosgrove's shoes wanes. Governor-elect Cosgrove has lately proposed, it seems, to take the oath of office at Paso Robles, if he should be unable to go to Olympla. Desir able as it may be from the stand point of the state's pride and welfare that he supplant Mead as speedily as possible. Mead would be Justified In refusing to turi over the office of Governor until his successor, duly qualified, Ehould come to Olympla. It is certainly not seemly that a Gov ernor of Washington should be sworn in and attempt to take office at Paso Robles. or In any other place outside of Washington or its capital, and The Oregonian thinks It would likewise be unconstitutional. Governor-elect Cosgrove should make every effort consistent with a prudent regard for his health and safety to be at Olym pla on January 11, the date of inau guration, or very soon thereafter; and there would then be no objection to an arrangement to turn the office over to tho Lieutenant-Governor as acting Governor, which Indeed was once be fore done in Washington in 1891 when Governor Ferry went to Cali fornia for his health and Lieutenant Governor Laughton became Governor ad Interim. Meanwhile, tTlero is general satis faction over the pleasant prospect of Governor Cosgrove's early recovery. THE DOBAR FIE DECISION. There seems to be some misconcep tion as to the point of law decided by the Oregon Supreme Court in the Dunbar caso. which was dismissed by that tribunal last Tuesday. Former Secretary of State Dunbar has been quoted as saying that the court de cided that he had a right to the money collected by him as fees. That is not correct. Tha court did not pass upon that question, but left it for de termination In future litigation. What tho court did decide was that, even if the fees were Illegally collected, tho state has no right to recover them, since they were not paid by the state, but were paid by Individuals. Whether they were. In fact, collected illegally was not decided, though this was the issue out of which the suit arose. The case was therefore decided upon a side issue the question whether the state is the proper party to recover the money. The real question, whether Dunbar should re pay, is farther from solution than ever, for the suit has been dismissed, and only by the bringing of another suit can the question be again presented. PANAMA CAXA1, BENEFITS. A decidedly important feature of the Panama Canal that until now has attracted little or no attention on the Pacific Coast is the possibilities it will offer for colonizing the farming re gions of the Pacific Coast with Eu ropean agrarians. The opportunities for an immense traffic of this nature have not es; .pcd the watchful eyes of the Hamburg-American Steamship Company. A San Francisco dispatch says that agents of the big German steamship line have already been in consultation with the Department of Immigration concerning facilities for handling large crowds of immigrants at the Bay City. The advantages of business of this character are many and great. The crying need of the Pacific Coast States for years has been more people not of the kind that crowd Into tho cities and Intensify the struggle that is always a feature of urban life but good hard-working agriculturists who are indifferent to union rules, walking delegates or any other of the unprofitable factors and features of city life. Immigrants of this class have been pouring into the Atlantic seaboard cities for years: but very few of them ever get as far west as Chicago, the distance being so great that they are unable' to attempt It when they first come to the country. Later, becoming settled in a rut into which they fall soon after landing, they remain there. Thousands of these farming and gardening immi grants have been scattered through the worn-out farming districts in the New England States, and by practic ing the thrift, self-denial and intense farming methods that are a necessity in the Old World, they have made suc cesses where even the frugal, hard working Yankees have been unable to hold their own. For immigrants of this class the Pacific Coast States offer unlimited op portunities, for with only a fraction of the effort that is necessary in order to wrest a living from the worn-out soil of New, England, they can soon become Independent in Oregon and Wrashington. With a direct steam ship service by way of tho Panama Canal, European immigrants could be landed at Pacific Coast ports at a cost not materially greater than that in curred in reaching New York. The steamship companies making these low rates would thus aid in building up this new country, and as a reward would secure a large traffic at profitable rates on European-bound cargoes of freight as well as on passengers who would much prefer going direct .by steamer In stead of by the present route. The Pacific Coast States will continue to grow at a rapid rate without assist ance from the Panama Canal, but evi dence is accumulating that It la cer tain to be a highly Important factor In the Industrial and agricultural de velopment of this portion of the coun try. TUB AXGEI IX IKK HUMAN. HEART. Tho impulse of humanity denom inated by Whittier "the angel of the human heart" sleeps lightly so lightly that a shock of disaster, whether It breaks upon the sunny shores of the Mediterranean or upon the western border of the American continent, awakens it into instant life and action. Through Its impulse the world, full-handed, comes to save, or if this, by the magnitude of the dis aster. Is Impossible, to bury the dead and bring succor to the living. The hungry are fed. the shelterless are housed, the wounded and the sick are ministered unto and the dead are laid away by the impulse that guides the angel's hand. Mount Pelee emits smoke and lava and the fair city of St. Pierre is en tombed in his fiery gorge. Before the tottering walls have ceased to fall or the molten stream has lost itself, hiss ing and writhing, in the sea, vessels laden with the bounty of the world the hand of the angel upon the helm are steered for the devastated city. San Francisco Is shaken to her very foundations and riotous flames- leap high, as In ghoulish glee at their con quest over her, but while they still rage, their power unchecked, the awakened angel Is on the wing bear ing relief from the four quarters of the globe. Enceladus moves uneasily In his living tomb. Southern Italy trembles and sways upon her rocky foundations and her fairest cities go crashing to the earth. Scarcely have the walls of the smitten people risen upon the troubled air before the ships of commerce and of war, forming a mighty relief squadron, move under the guidance of the awakened angel and relief comes . leaping over tha waves, bearing such healing as she may to those still within reach of her magic touch. It does not take tho reverberating echoos of a mighty convulsion of Na ture to awaken the angel In the hu man heart." Witness the prompt re sponse when Chicago and Baltimore shrivelled in tho hot distress of great conflagrations, and when Johnstown and Galveston were devastated by on rushlng waters. When the stress is mighty tho response Is corresponding ly far-reaching. When it Is less the awakened angel does not withhold its hand, but promptly ministers to the lesser needs of those whose cry it is sure to hear. A GOOD LAW. It is cheering to begin the New Year with the assurance that the Federal food and drugs' act has been a success. Dr. H. W. Wiley, of the Department of Agriculture, says so, and he is In a situation to know all about it. He is the man who has been chiefly instru mental In enforcing tho act. Indeed his activity has centered the wrath, of tho adulterators upon his head, and if he retains his office another year It will not be by their favor. Still, Dr. Wiley says tha act has Improved the morals of those who deal in food and drugs. What they sell Is purer, tastes better and is more nutritious than the stuff wo used to get before Congress Interfered with their right "to do busi ness in their own way." This result ought to be satisfactory all round. No decent merchant wishes to poison people even if he makes money by it. The next natural step in regulating tha food trade is to make ail labels tell the exact truth. In the long run veracious labels must be better for buyer and seller both. Roosevelt of late has become the object of much savage criticism, even In quarters where he once received adulation. Such changes are not un common. It is an old remark that he who builds on the vulgar heart has a habitation giddy and unsure. But Roosevelt, it is probable, will not have harder luck than Washington. Tha Aurora was a newspaper published at Philadelphia. William Duane was its editor; Jefferson was Its mentor and Inspiration. On tha day after Wash ington retired from the Presidency the Aurora said: "The man who is the source of all the misfortunes of our country Is this day reduced to a level with his' fellow-citizens, and is no longer possessed of power to mul tiply evils upon the United States. Every heart. In unison with freedom, ought to beat high with exultation that the name of Washington ceases from this day to give currency to po litical iniquity and to legalize corrup tion." That was pretty stiff, wasn't it? Duane vas one of the editors through whom Jefferson had been prompting attacks on. Washington for years. Roosevelt is not likely to faro worse than Washington did. Tho ex tract quoted above may ba found in McMaster's History. Mr. James J. Corbett has expressed a willingness to fight "Mlstah John sing," who recently became champion bruiser of tho world by reason of tha poor foot-work and inability of Mr. Burns to land on tha Johnson features. "I will fight him if Jeffries won't." says Corbett, "not because I aim to fight a black man, but to wrest the title back and then arrange it so that by no possible future move any black man could ever regain it." Noble, self sacrificing Mr. Corbett. And it all seems so easy. Yet there Is that un comfortable thought that perhaps Just perhaps "Mlstah Johnsing" might place that bunch of knuckles which adorns his long arm, like a sugar-cured ham attached to a cap stan bar, on the particular part of the Corbett anatomy where one Rob ert Fltzsimmons landed a solar plexus before the color line became trouble some. It will be a great day for Mr. Pullman's whisk-broom artists when Corbett fights Johnson, provid ing there is any Corbett money to bo covered. A Los Angeles thief stole 100 tons of coal between 11 o'clock P. M. and 4 A. M. the following morning. In view of the weather reports that have been coming up recently from the sun ny southland, this fuel was probably the most valuable commodity in Los Angeles. Climate, which is the princi pal stock-dn-trade in the City of An gels, may be all right to sell to the tourists, but Its heating qualities are deficient when a cold wave strikes the land of perpetual Summer which wo read about in the guide-books. Our local police force should . feel en couraged by this exploit, for none of the numerous criminals who are win tering with us has ever got away with 100 tons of CQal. Thi3 shows that there are even poorer criminal-catchers than our own. "finest." Tha severe criticism of a recent grand Jury regarding Mr. Briggs, the autocrat of Kelly Butte, and his friends the County Court, seems to have been fully warranted. It Is a strange proceeding for the County Court to retain the custody of the prisoners after the law (indorsed by referendum) provides that tha Sher iff shall have charge of them. It is even more strange that a criminal, serving sentence which does not expire until January 9, should suddenly dis appear from Kelly Butte Just prior to publication of the singular circum stances surrounding the death of a man whom tho favored criminal is accused by a guard of brutally as saulting. As If the miseries of tho wretched victims of earthquake, fire and tidal wave in Southern Italy were not acute enough, the reservoirs of the skies have been opened and tha people, famished, maimed and shelterless, have been deluged with rain. The pity of the pitiful as well as the bounty of the generous is tho tender debt which humanity owes and Is making haste to pay to these af frighted. Impoverished, wounded and drenched Italians. That proposed effort to amend the local option law will at least give opportunity for some lively debates In the Legislature. Nothing but a normal school bill can stir up more discussion than a local option amend ment. Pendloton according to The East Oregonian, thinks It needs a local weather observatory, as its "stockmen and wheatgrowers are vitally affected by the sudden climatic changes that occur." Pendleton should get a bar ometer. A real live count has been Jailed in San Francisco, penniless, and charged with forgery. His countrymen in Ger many will be unable to believe this his finish In the American land of heiresses. Governor Chamberlain perhaps would favor an amendment to tha Statement One law, obliging Legisla tors to elect nly Statement members Speaker and President. Why not? Congress will assemble again today, and Roosevelt's message in reply to tho House is due. It ought to get storms of applause from tha pit. "What's all this talk about a colored man being the champion bruiser of tho world? Jim Jeffries, white man, has not been "licked" yet. If this pace keeps up very long tha Legislature will find It necessary to appropriate money for an addition to the penitentiary. This Chinook rain is bringing warmth from the south again, mak ing Midwinter Just like Springtime. French physicians, expert in ap pendicitis, say only well-to-do people have It. They need to be. "Pompadour Jim's" gorge rises to find the nigger in his class. John L. Is yet to be heard from. Jim Finch says ho won't hang fo two years yet. He Is a lawyer and ought to know. England's old-age pension law Isn't a marker to tho civil-service laws of this country. LIFE! IN THE OREGON COUNTRY I nlurky Geese. ' North Aiax Cor. Condon Globe. P. Worklnger made a lucky shot and bagged six wild geese Just in time for Christmas. Grand Free Gift Distribution, Perhaps. Rainier . Review. We hope during the coming year that we will be so prosperous that we will be able to give every one of our readers a gold watch for Christ mas. Light "Wanted. Brownsville Times. If the lazy, lousey, low-down can didate for the Penitentiary who stole a lantern from Harry Parks' buggy Sunday night will return same to this office he will be suitably rewarded. Find the Horn; You'll See the Notches. Corvallis Times. Frank Brown produced the evidence and Induced Clerk Moses to give him $2 for killing a coyote.- The notches on this coyote's horn indicated that he had slaughtered 50 lambs. Every time a coyote kills a lamb he always cuts a notch in his horn. One Busy Newspaper Man. Jefferson Review. The Review editor owns a fine Shep herd dog that we want to give to a party looking for a whole lot of trouble. We have only had him a few months, but he's cost $3 license, two suscrlbers. a scrap, and more precincts to hear from.. Apply for the beast when Mrs. Review is not at home, and thereby avoid mora trouble. Never Too Old to Learn. Plaza (Wash.) Cor. Pendleton Tribune. Kajrview public school has a pupil In attendance whose ago is 4 years. That Is Joseph Schmidt. He Is learn ing to pronounce the English alphabet and has made fair progress lor the last four weeks. Mr. Schmidt is a successful bachelor farmer ana old pioneer of this locality. "Wholesale Blatrlmony. Hood River Glacier. A triple wedding in the family of R. L. Dashlell Is to take place at Cedonla, Wash., for New Year's eve, in which two sons and a daughter of a pioneer rancher will be among the principals. Tho names of the couples are George Dashlell and Miss Wralker, of Waverly; Robert Dashlell and Miss Myrtle Myers, of Cedonia, and Clara Dashlell and Sydney Singleterry, of Kettle Falls. The ceremony will be performed by the Rev. William Carpenter- The Dashlell family crossed the plains In an early day from In diana to Oregon and later moved to the Columbia River valley, in Stevens County. Miss Walker's parents reside at Waverly. Miss Myers is a resident of Cedonia. Mr. Singleterry is a resi dent of Kettle Falls. Green Doctor Knows His Business. Rabbitville Cor. The Dalles Optimist Our new doctor had a case of ap pendicitis the yother day, the victime being a sheepherder. He cum into town and told dock his appendiclter had sum forrin substance lntwo it, he thought mebbe sum sheep dip, and wanted dock to opperate ontwo it. But when dock found out that the feller only had a dollar 75 dock told him to not bother his hed about it, but to save up his munney ontil he got ten $ and then he wood pronounce It appendicitis, but that it was not considered perfessional for to pro nounce that a man with only 1 seventy-five had the appendicitis. In such a weakened condition of a man's finances nothing worse than the belly ake cood be rong with him. Some White Champions Still Left. Portland Advocate. Why do some of the old has-been white sports and prizefighters and their sympathizers kick so hard be cause Jack Johnson, a colored man, is the heavyweight prizefighter of the world? Why begrudge the negro race that little mark of distinction when the white race have so many cham pions'' For Instance, tho champion grafter, the champion dynamiter, the champion safeblower, the champion night rider, the' champion holdup man and bank robbers. Now, with all thU army of champions, wny negruage m colored race a big champion prize fighter? But what If you do we have got It. and you will have to do soma tall fighting to take it rrom us. That s all. "Republican nnd Democrat the Same.'' Allentown, Pa., Dispatch. When applicants for naturalization were called up before Judge Trexler here, Frank Ponnl, an Austrian, was first presented. "How many political parties are there?" asked the Judge. "Two, Your Honor," replied Ponnl. "What are their names?" "Republican and Democrat." "What Is the difference between these parties?" "There Is no difference at all. Your Honor; no difference at all." "You'll pass," said the Court. And Prothonotary Plumer adminis tered the oath. Costs Cuba f.r-,000,000. Baltimore News. It cost Cuba a little more than $5,- 000,000 to be pacified by an American Army, and Uncle Sam Is going to collect every cent of the money. Poaslbly the expense of going on a Jamboree may finally persuade tne dons to get a steady Job and stick to it. Not Sportsman, "But Great for Golf." Washington, D. C, Dispatch. Count Bernstorff, the new German Ambassador to the United States, Bays he Is not a sportsman, but "is great for gojf." A FEW SQUIBS. "So your eon Is now a soldier, hey. Uncle Ben?" "Yes, san; he's done Jined de ma licious corpse, sab." Baltimore American. Clevorton (who has hired a taximeter cab to nroDOse In) "Say yes,' darling?" Mis Calumet "Give me time to think." "Heav ens! But not in here! Consider the ex pense 1" Life. An unfortunate misunderstanding "I had to leave my last situation because the mis sus said thay were going to lead the sinful life, and they wouldn't want any servants about the place." Punch. Farmer Greene "Did Josh M odder' s soa learn much at college?" Farmer Jones "Wa-al, I don't like ter say. All I know Is that he'd no sooner got back home than he was selected as a Juror on a murder trial." Judge. "In Egypt the priesthood was held re sponsible for the rise of the Nile," "Yes." answered Senator Sorghum. "We have changed all. that. Now the leaders of the people merely take credit for prosperity on general principles." Washington Star. Joakley "Yes, Samson. Don't you know Samson? That's my little Skye terrier my wire nas " Coakley "What! that tiny little purp? Isn't that rather silly?" Joakley "Oh. I don't know: you see, he'd be noth ing without bis hair." Philadelphia Press. The young housewife was engaging her first cook. "Of course." she said. "I don't want to have any trouble with you." "Thin It do be up to yersllf. ma'am," replied the Ititchen lady. "If yez make no complaints Ol'll make no trouble." Chicago Daily News. The Mother "My little boy was rude. I know. I am afraid he la awfully spoiled." The Stranger "Don't mention It, madam. It Is better th&t he should be spoiled than that his young life should be embittered by the thought that he Is different from all siUner American children." Life. Objection to One Feature of Modjeskl Brldse Plan. PORTLAND, Jan. 3. (To the Edi tor.) I have noted the numerous newspaper publications about the pro posed new bridge which many of the East Siders wish built across the river, beginning at Broadway as the east approach, with the western terminus somewhare about Seventh and Jonnson streets, near the railroad depot. All of which "looks good to me" with one exception, as follows: The report pub lished as embodying the advice of Ralph Modjeski, as well aa a sketch purporting to be made by him, advises the city to purchase the block bounded by Johnson, Irving. Sixth and Seventh streets as a stopping or starting place for the approach to the bridge, which, by the sketch, after crossing the river, runs almost due southwest four blocks before striking Seventh street, which It then follows due south about three blocks, or to Seventh and Johnson streets, where Mr. Modjeski, instead of allowing the road to continue by easy and straight grade up Seventh street, turns the approach at right angles on to the block he advises the city to buy, from whence traffic must again turn at right angles up Sixth Btreet. To the writer there appears no reason under tho sun for diversion of the traffic from a straight line up Seventh street to the proposed va cated block, unless It Is to provide a resting-place for pedestrians and teams before beginning that body-and-soul-wearylng climb of a 4 per cent grade to the bridge. It would cer tainly aid in the congestion of an al ready congested district in front of the depot, as any one may see who will take a walk down there about the ar rival or departure time of trains; whereas traffic going straight out Sev enth street may turn aside either east or west on any of the thirteen streets between Johnson and Washington streets without crowding or interfer ence with each other, as will certainly occur if they are forced to take to Sixth street, already congested by rea son of travel to and from the depot. Of course the city would have to pur chase, either with or without condem nation proceedings, the block named, together with the "shacks" which now cover it at prices which we may safely assume would well remunerate the present owners, and which prices would probably be about three times the real value. Or. perhaps the own ers of property fronting on Sixth street, imagining In their simplicity that more traffic on Sixth street would further enhance the value of their holdings, have by argument and many lmplorintrs afflicted Mr. Modjeski with astigmatism of the left or Sixth street eye. In either, case there can be no good or valid reason for the advice so free ly given that the city shall add an other half million dollars to an ever increasing burden of expense by the purchase of this block and buildings to go with the proposed bridge. We want and need this bridge, but we do not want or need any parks, drinking fountains, peanut stand or peddler lo cations furnished by the city free with it; nor do we wish the building of this bridge made prohibitive by sad dling it with , a lot of useless and tre mendously expensive real estate pur chases for approaches at either end. W. J. M ANDERSON. PRESERVING GAME FOR HUNTERS Dogs In Gettins Upland Birds, and Arti ficial Fccdlnsr of Water Fowls. PBTALUMA, Cal., Jan. 1. (To the Ed itorsHaving a deep interest in anything tending to better hunting and fishing con ditions in Oregon, It being one of Its greatest assets, I have lost no chance to keep in touch with all phases of this matter, In reading The Oregonian of late. So far. in these communications I havo noticed no complaint about artificial feed ing of water fowU in preserves, etc. Without wishing to stir up sectional strife, it must be admitted by any one at all familiar with the facts that compara tively no duck-shooting is to be had In the Willamette Valley of late years, and while it may be duo to other causes, the Valley 6portsmen, and particularly fann ers, lay it to the above cause. The farm ers, having the most to do with feeding and furnishing the grounds for upland game, think they have Just cause for com plaint, and any laws that do not seem fair to them will get as little respect as those In the past have received. While I am as fond of a dog as any one, I should be willing to dispense with that part of the pleasure of hunting up land birds, and think if the laws were to stand as they are for that class of game, and prohibit any one using a dog, that in a very few years there would be game enough for all, and tame enough for the most indolent so-called sportsman, to say nothing of the saving in lawns, as well as other economical and sanitary ad vantages to the city people, as most of that class of dogs are kept In cities and towns. If hunting contests by the sporting, as well as other clubs, were more strongly advocated during the closed season, for the enemies of protected game, a great advantage would result, and make pleas ant outings as well. This has proved very successful elsewhere. Any legislation tending to put a ban on boys fishing up to, say, the age of 16 or 18, Is going to swamp the Juvenile aa well as other courts with fruitless work, and do no good to any one but a select few. Any pleasure that is more beneficial than fishing, from any standpoint, to the grow ing youth or child, has yet to be found. W. E. GUNN. Ferero's Cleopatra. Italian professor says Cleopatra was fat and pudgy and that Antony was after her for her money. Hush! Is this historical muck-raking never to cease? Cleveland Leader. So Cleopatra was homely, after all. This Is, Indeed, a sad blow for these extensively-advertised Egyptian skin foods. Augusta Chronicle. It is to be hoped that Cleopatra and Ferero will not meet In the next world, although we mean no reflection on the lady by this remark. Phila delphia Inquirer. So Cleopatra was homely, after all! Well, at its worst, history Is only like those newspapers In which every Pollca Court heroine la young and beautiful. New York Tribune. Cleopatra having been disposed of as a fat, ugly, mannish woman, whose only attraction was her wealth. It Is now up to the historians to deal Saloma a blow by showing that her charms consisted mostly in bony shanks. De troit News. Statements are being published to the effect that there was nothing In that story about Mark Antony and fc-leo-patra. But why dig up so old a scandal as that? Washington Star. Perhaps history got its idea of Cleo patra's beauty from the society editor's report of her marriage to Mark Antony. Toledo Blade. Advent of Orange Cucumber. Boston, Mass., Dispatch. An orange cucumber, or cucumber orange. Is a combination raised by Howard S. Hill, a cucumber-grower of Gardiner, Mass. The new fruit, or veg etable, resulted from an experiment tried several weeks ago by Mr. Hill, who transferred the pollen from orange blossoms In his hothouse to several cucumber flowers. i SILHOUETTES BY ARTHUR A GP.EENE. HERE are the resolutions of es terday ? w My idea of the laziest man In tho worM is the fellow who pluys chess In tha afternoon. My one claim to l'nnio is that I've a friend in Naples, where the preta dis patches come from. n A Chicago capitalist and his brida aro to take their honeymoon trip In a bal loon. Many people find themselves "JP in the air" shortly after marriage. e Elbert Hubbard at long intervals pays something worth while. He If lis die story that recently lie was lecturing be fore 1000 attentive inmates of a state in sane asylum, when one old woman cam screaming down the alslo waving In r arms frantically. "My God! I cunt stand this nonsense any longer." "That." said the superintendent, "is the first sign she has shown of returning sanity. " New York has a hospital for sick fish, patronized presumably by suckers. Carrie Nation recently made the state ment that next to whisky, tea 1s tlit worst drink in the world. Evidently Carrie never tried putting absinthe In her beer, The dealers say that women's hosiery will be "louder" than ever next Summer. The purpose is evidently to mako It un necessary when a man reaches a street crossing, to observe tho signboard, "Stop, "Look and Listen." One divorce to six marriages was the record of Portland in IKS. The New York record is one to five. Portland will havo to do bettor if she wants to keen up with the march of progress. "Death Valley Scotty" says lie's goir to enlist in tho Marines. It's nil ri;-rht for him to tell that to thorn, but the ret of us who know Scotty, insist on being shown. It seems that Portland will have. tr worry along without Evangelist "Billy" Sunday. Still there are a number of other good shows scliwIuJed for the Winter. The dismissal of Yuan Shi Kai by the new Chinese regent indicates that tlu hand of Mo3t Honorable Friend Nippon has lost none of its cunning. In view of Judge Taffs well-known gastronomic reputation, that statesman promises to eat his way Into the hearts of his Southern countrymen at the forth coming 'possum and yam banquet which the people of Atlanta are to tender him. I am pained to observe that Calvin Heillg neglected to build his regular weekly theater last night. The heroic work of King Victor anl Queen Helena at stricken Messina proves that the designation "nobility" Is not a misnomer in Italy, at least. Pronnoriation of ,'Slllle., PORTLAND, Dec. 2.1. (To the C.litor .) A says "suite." pertaining to apartments. Is pronounced as "suit," pertaining to clothing. B says It is pronounced "sweet." A says "sweet" is a pronunciation use-i merely for effects, etc., and is not prone:-. Which Is correct? II. C J. B is correct. Best usago demands thu French pronunciation, "sweet." Does it occur to this correspondent that such disagreements as A and B had may be settled instantly by consulting Web ster or the Century Dictionary? Either of these publications is authority, in tlis office of Tha Oregonian. United States Senators. 8CIO, Or., Dec. 29. (To the Editor.) Will you please tell me through your pa per how many Senators are In tho Senate at one time, how many are elected at once, and how often, from one state? SCHOOL. GIRL. There are two Senators from each stata In the Union, making a total of 92 Sen ators, except when there are temporary vacancies. Senators are elected for a term of six years, at intervals of two or four years in each state. Information Concerning Argentina. TILLAMOOK. Or., Dec. 2S. (To the Edl ltor.) Please Inform me from what source I may obtain information regarding Ar gentina, South America, particularly the natural resources of the country. W. D. E. Write to tho Bureau of American Re publics, Washington, D. C. John Barrett is at the head of it. No. PORTLAND. Jan. 2. (To tho Edi tor.) I am trying to learn to use cor rect English and take the editorial columns of The Oregonian largely in a model. In an article Saturday, head ed "Speedy Justice," occur the worili "different purpose than." Is that ood, modern English? TYPEWRITER. The Flower and the Fruit. Now York Run. Our wise and reverend contemporary, The Oregonian of Portland, speaks thus rudely of the candidate for Postmaster of that city: Nobody In Portland thinks htm actually nr. for so Important a place. He is mt n:irr.el for his fitness. That is not for a moment considered by his promoter. Me I n;ime I because he is Bourne's particular tojuiy end factotum. Our plalesmau of l'orlland wan'.J and must have his man. Why this bitter speech? The Hon. Jonathan Bourne, Jr., is tho bright consummate flower of the Oregon gar den of whimsies. Ho has been approved by "the people;" at least, ha has man aged to get himself chosen Senator. Popular primaries have produced him. Is he not to be accepted. If not thank fully, at least contritely? And lika master, like man. Live Owl lor a Subscription. Pittsburg, Pa., Dispatch. A man inquired of the editor of Trev orton (Pa.) Times if he would accept a live owl in exchange for six months' subscription to the paper. The editor responded: "We have no precedent i";' refusing, and If we can find a man who Is out of an owl and wants one, we'll do It." Weddinff Ring In Turkey Dinner. Albany, N. Y.. Dispatch. Mrs. Lena Kreppelt, of New York, lost her weddins ring while stufllnjr the turkey for dinner. During the meal her husband struck something hard, which proved to be tho missing band. Knocking the Puritan. St. Louis Globe-Democrat. A Boston paper refers to William the Conqueror as an early filibuster. It might feel hurt if the Mayflower were called a little tub of the 17th century.