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About The daily Astorian. (Astoria, Or.) 1961-current | View Entire Issue (June 28, 2016)
THE DAILY ASTORIAN • TUESDAY, JUNE 28, 2016 FEATURES Son’s wife cuts off family Dear Annie: Several years ago, our son lived with a very immature young woman. We tried to make her feel welcome, but she had no interest in getting to know us. The only thing she ever asked was how much our son would inherit. She then had an affair. Our son asked whether he should leave her. My husband said yes, but I told my son that people make mistakes and it was his decision. He stayed. A few months later, she was worried he might leave, so she lied about using the pill and got pregnant. The baby was christened and baptized with only her family present. We saw the photos on Facebook. When they got married shortly after, they never said a word to us. We decided not to hold a grudge. We bought a house where they could live for $200 a month in rent, and gave them $40,000 to furnish it. Our new daughter-in-law said we should let them live there rent- free and they stopped paying rent. They also didn’t take care of the house. So we sold it, and when we didn’t give them the proceeds, she told everyone that we were terrible people and had stolen their money. They now have two children and a third on the way. We are not allowed to see the grandchildren. Annie’s Mailbox Creators Syndicate Inc. Kathy Mitchell and Marcy Sugar Our son calls us once a month, but he’s afraid to tell his wife. We just wrote a new will and are giv- ing them nothing. We haven’t told our son this, but we’ve told our other children that they can give their brother a share if they choose. But his wife has also cut off con- tact with the siblings, as well as our son’s grandparents. It’s been ive years. We would still welcome her, but we aren’t holding our breath. Our son says he’s OK with this. He says he’s not abused. Sometimes there is no happy ending. — Resigned to Our Situation Dear Resigned: We are so sorry your son married such an unkind, immature person. Also, that he is too cowardly to take a stand, fear- ful that she might leave. But that is highly unlikely. We wonder how your daughter-in-law would react if she learned that you might recon- sider including them in your will if you were allowed to spend time with the grandchildren. She sounds mercenary enough to think about it. It’s good that you have other chil- dren to lean on. Our condolences. Dear Annie: I just returned from a bridal shower and learned that a few of us were not invited to the wedding. I am a good friend of the bride and of her mother. The other women at my table said, “See you at the wedding.” I stayed silent. Several of us are baking the cake and cookies for the wed- ding. Most of us who are doing the baking are not invited. When did it become OK to invite people to a shower and not the wedding? — Old-Fashioned Dear Old-Fashioned: It is not OK to invite friends and family to a shower and not the wedding. (Work showers fall into a different category.) It is especially rude to ask these same people to bake for the event, unless you are charging them a fee. However, there is a pos- sibility that the bride assumes you will be in attendance anyway since you are preparing the desserts. You might talk to the bride’s mother and clear it up. We’d hate for there to be a misunderstanding. 5A Tomorrow’s horoscope By Holiday Mathis, Creators Syndicate Inc. ARIES (March 21-April 19). The passive move isn’t always the best one, but in this case, today’s conflict probably doesn’t have to involve you. Retreat from that stress and you’ll be advancing to your own centered being. TAURUS (April 20-May 20). Your truth is very close to that of your friend’s. Because you can understand each other so well, the exchange you have this afternoon will be ca- thartic. It feels good to be heard. GEMINI (May 21-June 21). The question is whether you should do the job yourself or en- list someone else to do it. The answer will be quickly made obvious when the right person makes the job look easy. CANCER (June 22-July 22). It’s easy to be confident when you’re comfortable, which is why your sartorial decisions will matter so much to the outcome of today’s business. Perfectly dressed for the occasion at hand, you’ll have a distinct advantage. LEO (July 23-Aug. 22). Heart to heart exchanges with others make everyone feel more loved and more loving. The expansive and joyful energy is a contagion that will make its way through the Borromean rings of your social world. VIRGO (Aug. 23-Sept. 22). Most of the jobs today are important enough to take seriously, get right and finish before you hit the pillow to- night. But the thing that is the most important job will be the silliest one. LIBRA (Sept. 23-Oct. 23). It’s the exchange of energy, ideas and feelings, flowing back and forth — this more than anything is what makes a group of people feel like home to you. When this exchange is interrupted, seek to heal the breach immediately. SCORPIO (Oct. 24-Nov. 21). Each person FRANK AND ERNEST BLONDIE THATABABY SALLY FORTH PHOEBE AND HER UNICORN B.C. LOLA DILBERT SIX CHIX BIZARRO MUTTS NON SEQUITUR BABY BLUES WIZARD OF ID ZITS ROSE IS ROSE in the team is helping the other reach new potentials. It’s not a conscious effort; rather, it’s the very nature of the group to elevate one another in the spirit of competition and cama- raderie. SAGITTARIUS (Nov. 22-Dec. 21). You have a limited amount of time and much to do within that time today; it’s true. However, you’ll find that when you endeavor to fully inhabit the moment, it will bend and stretch to love you back. CAPRICORN (Dec. 22-Jan. 19). The in- formation you learn today will be a piece of a puzzle that will intrigue you for weeks to come. An ensnarling mystery can be a de- lightful diversion, and this one has personal implications, too. AQUARIUS (Jan. 20-Feb. 18). There are so many ways to see the truths of the day. Some are hard, others warm; then there are bright truths and stark ones. And by the way, there’s no good reason to doubt the easy truths — they, too, might exist. PISCES (Feb. 19-March 20). Being around busy, chaotic people will activate your fond- ness of peace and quiet. The serenity you long for all day will stretch before you tonight, sweetly fulfilling. WEDNESDAY’S BIRTHDAY (June 29). While there are those around you who en- deavor to get rich and gather honors, your main aim is to do good and be useful. Your modest goals will bring results both pleas- ing and astounding. Unencumbered by the warped perspective of ambition, you’ll be extremely attractive and have your choice of company all year. Taurus and Sagittarius adore you. Your lucky numbers are: 9, 2, 14, 44 and 17.