AMOOK HEADLIGHT, APRIL 8. 1920 ‘-ii What the Editors Say Coaxing You to Smile. Political Band Wagon. Isn't the Portland Journal having a time with politics these days? Re­ publican politics have so convulsed the editorial staff that the news staff aided by its Washington bureau has come to the rescue in making it ap­ pear that the G. O. P. is to have a repetition of the split of 1912, Good night:—News Reporter. o The Roseburg papers could no long­ er stand the increasing cost of pro­ ducing newspapers and the two have cons >lidated under the name of the Roseburg News-Review. Both publishers remain in the business and we wonder how they are going to harmonize their conflicting politi­ cal news.— The Sentinel. ------- o A New York Medico, who probably has tried them all ways, is authority for the statement that kisses in the morning are more unsanitary than at night, after the sunshine has had an opportunity to sweeten the lips. Only the brave deserve the fair, and the man who refuses a morning kiss for fear of the danger may be put down as a cov.aid unworthy the love of any girl worth having. We'll take ours stewed, fried, boiled, uncooked, sterilized or unsterilized. —The Sen- ■ tinel. Newspaper men are getting more sense as the years go by. A news­ paper used to be published for spite purposes or politics. Nowadays a newspaper is regarded as a business proposition, and two daily newspap­ ers in a town the size of Roseburg is >ne too many. They are an im­ position on the merchants. We con­ gratulate Messrs. Bates and Wliim- berly on their good sense in consoli­ dating their enterprises.—Gazette Times. Truth is, that we have as many radicals in Oregon, in proportion to our population as has Washington, but we have been able to hold them in check through the efforts of a comparatively level headed men, aided by the conservative newspapers of the state that have frowned upon men and measures that have appear­ ed inimical to our grow ing prosperity The .-title newspaper 13 by far the greatest factor we have in keeping irresponsible citizens from getting far with dangerous propaganda, and is so recognized by thinking people. —Oregon City Enterprise. "Pa, what is an idealist?” "Usually I he is a man, my boy, who has high notions of what the other fellows ought to do.” ------ o------ The Colonel’s Lady's Maid. I want the Republican nomination for sheriff at the primary election A young flying officer met a pretty next May. To get it I have to have girl—er—informally at Coney Island enough Republican votes. All who one afternoon. She was dressed aw­ have fuith in me, and vote for me,, I fully swell, and when they separated thank in advance. she gave him a very fashionable New Frank Hannenkrat. York address; so the next time lie was in town he wired her to meet Announcement. him at the Ritz for dinner. She turned up, looking smarter Owing to the fact that a large than ever, and after dinner they did number of tax payers in different a theatre. A brother officer sat in a parts of the county have asked me to box and the young airman waived to make the race for County Judge, and him, but got a rather quizzical re­ believing that with my previous ex­ sponse. perience in County business, I am “What ails Topper?” he thought, qualified for the office, I hereby an- and at the end of the act the ques­ nounce myself as a candidate for tho tion was answered. office of County Judge, subject to the "Hellow there!” Topper said, com­ approval of the Republican voters at ing up to him in the lobby. "I don't the coming Primary Election. mind your taking out my wife’s maid Homer Mason, old num, but I wish to goodness you’d ask her to wear her own frocks. When this country succumbs to | the principle that ‘might is right” may the good Lord have compassion i upon the people, yet that is the doc­ trine preached by the I. W. W. or­ ganization, and this is an extract, from their bible: "We are not fogged by illusions of right or wrong. We My Ford. do not bow at the shrine of tender The Ford is my chariot. phrases. Might is right. Let us learn I .tali not want. the lesson and organize until we are It maketh me lie down in wet plac- the mightiest. Where sits the gener- es. al executive board of the I. W. W. It destroyeth my soul, there will sit the government of the It leadeth me into the deep waters. United States.” There it is in a nut- It leadeth me into the pathes of shell, and those believing in such ridicule for its name's sake. teachings should lose no time in join­ It prepareth a breakdown for me in ing tbe Haywood ranks in their ef­ the presence of mine enemies. fort to overthrow the government.— I will fear more evil when it’s with Sheridan Sun. me. Its rods and its shafts discomfort Typical of the hypocrisy of the me. Portland Journal Is its present at­ It anolnteth my face with oil. tempt to curry favors with the coun­ Its water boileth over. try press that it has injured so vital­ Surely to goodness, if Lizzie follow ly in the past. The Journal joins in me all the days of my life, with complaints made by the country I shall dwell in the house of Nuts papers that some of the city dailies forever.—Exchange. are printing issues altogether too large in size while there Is a scarcity To th« Members of the Republican of r.ews print paper, thus working a The Good Old Days. hardship in price on the country Party. ------ o------ - press. While the complaint of the Today it is a poor egg that doesn’t state press has merit, the sanctimon­ I am a candidate for the office of bring a nickel, and butter is worth I ious attitude of the Journal is not as i District Attorney for Tillamook 70 cents the pound. The old-timer disinterested as its preachy editorials | County and will be glad to have your looks back over the years. He sighs would indicate. The reason the Jour­ support at the coming primary elec- for the good old times. Eggs were 10 nal is holding down its size is not 1 tlon. cents a dozen and butter 20 cents a out of any philanthropic desire to al­ If I am nominated and elected I pound says the Miami News. leviate the news print shortage. It is will perform the duties of the office But does he really want the "good because the Journal has a paper con­ to the best of my ability, and en­ old times?” Let’s see. tract which limits it to a certain deavor to serve all of the people by In those days people had parlors definite supply at the low contract an efficient, just and equal enforce­ and didn't use them. Now they have price, while the competitors about ment of the law. living rooms and wear ’em almost whom it complains have contracts T. H. Goyne. for much larger quantities of paper They lighted their homes with and hence can print larger Issues. It When one reads of Trotzky, the kerosene hanging lamps. is a case of sour grapes with the people's friend, riding about in luxu­ Fellows took their girls out buggy Journal.—Oregon Voter. * rious trains and automobiles the riding and knew nothing of the joy thought occurs that demagagues, of a fleet motor car. given power, act alike in every lan­ No Shield for Slackers. Men were paid a dollar a day on guage. When a politician who pro­ ------- o------- the section, and the other day labor­ fesses to be lying awake nights wor­ General Wood objects to our 4,800- er just a little above him, was paid I 000 men who have had military rying about the people gets a chance ten dollars a week. to hand the people something, he cer­ As some other man has said, when ! training being made a sheltering tainly takes advantage of all his op­ a person had weak lungs they began shield for slackers. He does not ac- portunities. to select a nice green spot in the i cept the contention that so long as -— o------- "marble orchard" for hint, and if | we have these trained men to call Democratic National Chairman your appendix got tangled up, they | upon in a war emergency there Is no said you had inflammation of the necessity of training any more men. Cummings is much peeved over the i In a recent speech in South Dakota appointment of a committee to con­ bowels and they buried you deep. sider planks for a Republican plat­ And women wore bustles and long he said. “I am inclined to think that the form «Unfortunately the Republican gertny skirts and had limbs instead American Legion and ex-service men party hasn't a committee of one to of legs. Houses were heated by stoves of generally feel that they have done resume all the responsibility in mat­ I one kind or another. And—bath tuba their part in the war and they ters of this kind. ------ o and other toilet facilities there were do not propose to be the perpetual, none. Remember those cold winter everlasting fighting force, with the At his recent birthday banquet Col. nights with the ordinary lot 220 feet slackers behind them, who do not Bryan felicitated himself upon tho want to train.” - fact that all the great reforms he has long? Beyond a doubt General Wood here advocated have been adopted. There, Yes, those were not the good old days. Let ’em keep their 10 cent speaks the ex-service men’s minds, for instance, is the free and unlimit­ eggs and their 20-cent butter. Living They surely have done their part, ed coinage of sliver at the ratio of in 1920 is worth more than it costs, I They are still in the vigor of their sixteen to one without awaiting the young manhood, most of them. If advice or consent of any other nation even if it costs more than it did. I we were again plunged into war whatsoever. i ------ o------- Wouldn’t Woodrow like to wake up I while that vigor remains with them, beyond a peradventure they would The Turks act as If they had never some morning and find out that he be the first over the top. They have read the fourteen points which were had been dreaming all tlris stuff about having brought back a treaty acquired the habit of following thb told by the administration press of peace with a league of nations American flag wherever it may lead. agents had changed their sinful na- But, as General Wood says, they do lures. covinant? Oh, Boy, that Would be a not intend that their training and grand and glorious feelln . ! their staunch patriotism shall be a The Democratic politicians and or- perennial shield for slackers. Our on­ gaiis are now busy cursing the Re- Sam Blythe says politics is rotten. coming generation of young men are publican Congiess because it can’t If Sam Is speaking of the politics of not to be left to degenerate into a stop the extravagance of the admin­ the administration he and the other lined of mollycoddles behind a ram­ istration or pay Its big bill» without Wilson press ag nts helped above part of neatly five million young levying taxes. over on I he country he Is right, but, veterans. ........ o ..... ■ curiously enough, the statement is General Wood is right. They have Attorney General Palmer’s scheme made as part of a campaign to per- done their part, these ex-service nten. nt stopping th«- high cost of living by petuate some of the loud smells Now let the country and the on-com- • ■.Iking It to death seems to be work­ which these very press agents ad- i I.-g youth of the country do their». - ing about like all the administration vertised as political attar of roses. I Harvey's Wf < kIj. remedies for what ails us. STAR GARAGE TIRES, TUBES AND ASSESORIES. We Give Goodyear Service C. F. PANKOW, Proprietor run mills, feed mills, feed cutters, pumps, etc. IFaSr *«w b rveSa« Windiw Aw lAae y OMI om4."—T 1. 4 miles. No bid will be considered unless accompanied by cash, bidders bond, or certified check for an amount equal to at least 5 per cent of the total amount of the bid. Specifications may be seen at the office of the county clerk of Tilla­ mook County, Oregon. The right is reserved to reject any and all proposals, or to accept the proposal deemed best for Tillamook county. First publication April 1, 1920. Last publication April 9, 1920. Homer Mason, County Clerk. One of the things that ia the mat­ ter with the country is that the peo­ ple took the magazine muck rakers, uplifters and reformers too seriously, and have been experiencing the re­ sults. Yet this outfit is still buisly engaged in telling the people what to do. «ar ------- o------- I hereby announce myself as a candidate for re-election of County Surveyor, on the Republican ticket, Obscure. "How did Jones come out with that at the primary election, May 21st, scheme of his to learn three new 1920. If successful will conduct the office in an efficient, economical and words every day?” courteous matter. "It didn’t work. He ] learned the W. S. Coates. -A words all right, but when he used them nobody knew what they '♦t Announcement. meant.” i ------o— ■ ------- o------- Upon the advice of a > .rge number Looking Forward. of leading citizens of Tillamook They had just become engaged. County. I have decided to announce "I shall love,” she cooed, "to share myself as a candidate for the office all your griefs and troubles.” of County Clerk, subject tc the ap­ "But, darling”, he replied, " I voters at I proval of the Republican have none.” the primaries to be held in May. "No,\’ she agreed; ‘but I mean If nominated and elected I will when we are married." perform the duties of said office to ------ o----- - the best of my ability, and will de­ A Little More Than Kin. vote my exclusive time in looking Last year I asked my best girl to after the Interests of said office and become my wife, and she said "No!” the taxpayers of Tillamook County But I got even with the girl. I mar­ affected thereby. ried her mother. Then my father Dated this 14th day of January, married the girl, Now I don’t know 1920. what I am. J. C. McClure. When I married the girl’s mother the girl became iny daughter, and when father married my daughter To The Republican Voters of Tilla­ mook County. she was my mother. Who in the dick­ ens am I? My mother’s mother I am a candidate for Eheriff in the (which is tny wife) must be my grandmother, and I being my grand­ Republican Primaries. I am a deputy in this office at mother’s husband, I am my own present, have had several years ex- grandfather. perience there, and I submit my ----- o------ record as an officer for your consid­ Resigned. eration. "When you are going to have your Should I be nominated and electedj vacation?” I will endeavor to serve you effi­ "Not going to have any.” ciently, honestly and impartially. "But I thought that you were go­ John Aschim. ing to spend a month with your wife and the children at the seashore. To the Voters of Tillamook County. “I am.” Goodyear ServicejjStation for Tillamook City is at the A money-maker and hard work saver for land elearers and wood-cuttine contractors. One man can move it from cut to cut. Simple and reliable Hundreds U._S. When not in me for wood cutting, the 4 H. P. motor wiU nuuutuua in IM use U0W all overthe »—-r — ---------- Announcement. I Announcement. To the Republican voters of Tilla­ mook county. I hereby offer my services to thy people of Tillamook Co. as County Commissioner and respectfully ask your support at the coming primaries I stand tor permanent roads properly located and fair treatment to all sec­ tions of our county. H. V. Alley. L » Announcement. I hereby announce myself as a can­ didate for the Republican nomina­ tion for representative in the legis­ lature from the 14th Legislative Dis­ trict embracing Yamhill and Tilla­ mook Counties. Frank A. Rowe. Announcement. '4 I hereby announce myself as a candidate for County Judge at the next primary election. My motto. "100 per cent efficiency for every taxpayer’s dollar.” W. L. Campbell. To The Voters of Tillamook County. ------ o------ I hereby announce myself as a can­ didate for County Clerk, on the Re­ publican ticket, subject to the ap- provalof the voters at the primaries next May. H. S. Brimhall, Announcement. ■ ■ ■ o------ I hereby announce myself a can­ didate for the office of County Treas­ urer of Tillamook County, on the Republican ticket. Alexandria Rock. Announcement. I hereby announce myself as a can­ didate for the office of County Treas­ urer of Tillamook County, for re­ election, on the Republican ticket. Kathleen Mills. To the Voten of Tillamook County. I hereby announce myself a can­ didate for the office of County School Superintendent of Tillamook County, subject to the approval of the voters at the coming primary election. G. B. Lamb. Announcement. ------- o------ I am a candidate for re-election on the Republican ticket, at the primary election. May 21, for the office of County Assessor. Economy, effeclency , and a busi­ ness system in handling the work of the office, combined with careful courteous treatment to all, has been my policy in the past, and will by my policy in the future. C. A. Johnson. Announcement. ------- o- — I hereby announce myself as a can­ didate on the Republican ticket for the office of County Commissioner of Tillamook County subject to the will of the voters at the primary election May 21. Frank C. Reed. ‘ if- ' ~~