TILLAMOOK HEADLIGHT MARCH 6,
what the Editors Say
A Contrast.
COAXING YOU TO SMILE.
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Cj
Job was a patient cuss. But then
they didn't have strikes and bone­
dryness and influenza and stock-
jobbers in his day. —Itemizer.
0
K
K
Canada is paying its discharged
While the Going Wai Good.
'soldiers a “war service gratuity”
which amounts to $100 a month for I A darky was ushered into an em-
married men and $70 a month for ployment bureau of the Du Pont
single men, for six months after leav­ Powder Works and plied with the
ing the service. This is in.the form of usual questions put to all new bands
The Polk Co. Itemizer states the continuation pay, field allowance taken on at the works.
The old darky stood the examina­
bad fix as follows:
"Wager, can’t ! and all other allowances, and is in
come down because prices ace so addition to provisions made for those tion pretty well, but was beginning
high, and prices can’t come down be­ who come under the jurisdiction of to feel just a little bit uneasy when
-the department of soldiers' civil re­ one of the men suddenly asksd:
cause labor costs so much.”
establishment. Soldiers who require
"And who would you like to be
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Good roads will end many of the 1 vocational rehabilitation receive this, notified in case of a serious accident?
farmer’s troubles, but it may bring and the war service gratuity is paid
The darky paused and scratched
new ones. His wife isn’t going to to them after this has been com- his bead a bit at this unexpected
find time to Btay in the kitchen pleted.
, blow at his morale, but after a little
The United States meanwhile is while he thought of two persons who
nearly as much as she is doing at
discharging men without bonus pay might like to know of his misfortune.
present.—Telephone Register.
! or allowance. It tells them in sub­ ¡Their names were written down.
Don’t it beat all how the world stance, that it is through with them.
“And now”, said one of the exami­
does move; one out of every eight­ They have done the work expected ners, “where would like to have your
een people in the United States is an of them. Now they may go out and remains shipped?”
automobile owner. The coming sea­ hustle jobs.
I “Where would I like my remains
son will show a decrease In the ratio I The example ot Canada is a com­ shipped?” repeated the darky in a
for it is predicted that 1919 will be plete answer to those who always groggy sort of voice, ‘‘Boss, I’se
one of the biggest years In the his­ find obstacles to accomplishment. It gwine to take ’em away from here
tory of the Industry. Someday nearly shows conclusively that the thing right now!"
everybody will own a car.—News can be done. Peace came to Canada
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and to the United States simultane­
Reporter.
I
Hopper Recognized.
ously.
Canada
has
acted
and
the
f
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“Even animals show their feeling,”
The demand of employers for fe­ United States has not.
remarked De Wolf Hopper, the come­
The moral of the contrast ought
male help is said to have decreased
dian, to a friend the other day.
one-half since the war’s end. What not to be lost upon the American “Only yesterday an animal showed
people.
—
Oregonian.
suggestion does this bring to your
me gratitude, 1 was going along a
mind? Here is ours; When the sol­
stream in the country when I met a
Colossal Cost of the War.
diers get home and get settled into
cow in great distress. Her calf was
jobs there wil| be the biggest spurt
drowning. I plunged in the water
Secretary
Baker
estimates
the
total
in the matrimonial market ever
and rescued the calf and the grateful
direct
cost
of
the
war
to
all
belliger
­
known to the memory of the oldest
cow licked my band.”
ents
at
$193,000,000,000.
These
stag
­
inhabitant.—Telephone Register.
“That wasn’t gratitude,” replied
gering figures tally pretty closely
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with the recent estimate of Joseph the friend. “The cow thought she
The United States is not morally
Kitchin, a British statistical author­ had twins.”
bound to a league of nations plan.
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ity, of 40,000,000,000 pounds sterl­
Because the president assumes to en­
ing, which on the present basis, is
Mire'n
Full
and Mournful.
dorse a scheme of that kind, does not equivalent to $190,400,000,000.
Little Willie, together with his pa­
make it obligatory. In fact, the pres­
i Mr. Kitchin calculates that the na-
ident being the servant of the people, I tional debt of the billigerents have rents, was invited to a Sunday dinner
should first seek to know the public ' increased seven fold from 6,800,000- at the home of his uncle. Chicken
was the piece de desistance of the
mind and conform to it, rather than I 000 pounds to 40.000,000,000
pounds gladsome layout, and, being a great
attempt to compel the public to come | and their annual interest
burden lover of the dainty morsal, Willie ex­
to his way of thinking. The latter
i nine fold, from 225,000,000 pounds panded his appetite to fit the occa­
course savors too much of autocracy | to 2,050,000,000 pounds.
sion.
to set well in this country. The
Mr. Kitchin estimates the British
When the dessert was served the
Senate is yet to be consulted.—Ump­
Empire's war costs at 8,325,000,000 youngster had to balk, Manfully he
qua Valley News.
pounds, France’s at 6,000,000,000 made two or three stabs at the dish,
pounds, the United States’ at 4.000- and then gazed at it with a dejected
Ninety-six kinds of the common, 000,000 pounds, nearly $20,000,000- expression.
ordinary, everyday food, clothing 000, Russia’s
at
3,600,000,000
"What’s the matter, Willie?” ask­
and supplies used extensively by pounds, excluding the external strife
ed his uncle, with a smiling glance
Americans, taken as a whole have I since the ignominious peace with
at the youngster. “You look mourn­
risen in price from $8.65 on July 1, 'Germany, and Italy's at 2,400,000,-
ful.”
1914 to $19.03, December 1, 1918. 000 pounds.
“That’s just what'tne matter Is.”
These figures are compiled from
Turning to the central powers the pathetically answered Willie "I am
Bradstreet’s latest index numbers by same authority puts Germany’s war
more’n full.”
advanced students of economics, who costs at 8,750,000,000 pounds, Aus­
also see a slight ray of sunshine for tria-Hungary’s
at
4,800,000,000
The Bad Egg.
the consumer in the fact that prices pounds, Turkey’s
at 370,000,000
apparently reached the highest point pounds and Bulgaria’s at 150,000,-
William Howard Tait said, apro­
on July 1, 1918. In the last 52 000 pounds.
pos of Germany's invitation to Presi­
months the wholesale prices have
These stupendous figgures cover dent Wilson to visit Berlin:
risen 120 per cent.—Telephone Reg­ only the direct cost of the war, tak­
"Germany doesn’t know it, but for
ister.
ing no account of the colossal indi­ the next generation the rest ot the
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rect losses resulting from the ruin or world is going to find her as un­
palatable and hard to stomach as—
Parents whose sons went to France depression of industries.
may not be making much noise over
They are a staggering indictment well, it reminds me of a story.
"Little Willie, his ma thought one
the order of Secretary Baker setting of the German
militarists who
conscientious objectors free with a plunged the world Into the frightful morning, must be ill, for he was at
payment of $400, but they can be conflict, But there remains a far breakfast, stalled on his first boiled
expected to be heard from when talk­ more terrific indictment in millions egg, when he usually got through
ing will count. These men not only of soldier graves, millions of non­ two eggs, a piece of steak and nine
refused to fight but they refused to combatants dead from privation, ex­ hot cukes in regular lightening fash­
no non-combatant service such as be- posure and anguish, and millions of ion.
"Eat your egg, Willie.’
coming stretcher bearers as many mutiliated and wounded soldiers,
“The urchin sighed and went
genuine objectors whose conscience Outraged civilization i will find it
forbade fighting gladly performed. hard to forgive these i monstrous the egg obediently but languidly.
"Willie, eat your egg.’
Putting a premium on plain shirking crimes. They never will be forgiven
"Another sigh and another languid
does not sit well on Americans who until the world shall have indubita­
have made every possible sacrifice ble proofs of German repentance.— attack.
"Thus five minutes passed. Then
during the past year and a half, and Spokesman Review.
it will not be the least of many
Willie looked pathetically at his
mother and said.
counts In the indictment which they
will return one of these days.—Inde­ Foolish Threats are Heard Against
"Oh ma; have I got to eat the
pendent.
beak?”
Prohibition.
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Sporadic threats
of resistance to
The attempt at the present session
of the legislature to amend the Jaw constitutional prohibition are Justly
requiring the holding of all elections condemned by Senator Wesley L.
simultaneously
direct*
attention Jones, who properly excoriates those
aguin to the folly of adopting by New York newspapers that are incit­
the initiative hulf-baked laws which ing rebellion against the prohibition
are found defective when tried out. amendment. Speaking to the senate
.but which unfortunately must re­ Saturday regarding the attitude of
main laws until the people them- one New York newspaper, Senator
selves repeal them, This la rarely Jones said: "Its columns are used not
done for while the author of a law to uphold, but to discredit the con­
will spend time and money to get stitution and to bring the laws of
it on the ballot there Is no one to the land Into contempt. This Is un­
take the same course when Its pre­ patriotic, dangerous to the republic,
tended claims are exploded. The law un-American and the worst kind of
bolshevism.’ ’
tn question was found as full of holes
Opinions may differ
on what
as a ntoaquelto net when flrBt tried
Washington, If now alive, would
out last fall, but there Is little chance
think of the proposed league of na­
of repealing It and It appears that
tions, but there is not room for two
the relief granted by the proposed
opinions on what he would Hay and
amendment is slight. Complaint now
do If called on to deal with these op­
will do little good and about all there
en threats to defy the constitutional
is to do is to grin and bear it and
law on prohibition. He would, if
hope tho experience will teach the
driven to it, send the armed forces of
people not to be In a hurry to vote
the government against the misled
for laws until they are very certain
Insurgents and rebels, just as in 1794
they are what they purport to be..
he sent 15,000 militiamen against
There would, therefore. ,be no excuse
the insurgents In the whisky Insur­
to refer to this law did not the pro­
rection, when Ignorant, misled and
moters of the amendment make the
disloyal men defied the laws of con­
old claim that it will result in econ­ gress regulating and taxing the
omy, for it does not. It may effect a
liquor traffic.
saving in a few of the larger towns
These present-hour threats to stir
and cities, but Oregon is a state of up rebellion against enforcement of
small towns and only one large city. the prohibition amendment strike at
In an overwhelming majority of the foundations of our government.
cases holding a city election meun* The prohibition amendment was not
an election board at an expense of passed in haste or on impulse. No is­
about 110 and printing ballots which sue was ever more deliberately and
were the size of handbills and which more extensively debated by the
cost but a few dollars. Contrast this American people. The procedure has
with the making of new precincts been lawful, constitutional and en-
each with two election bourds and tirely regular, and it is the clear du-
then figure out the saving. Au we 1 ty of every man who calls himself an
said above, it is too late to kick now, American to accept In good spirit
but those who would patch up the 'and ungrudging respect the will of
law should not fool themselves with I the majority of the nation as it has
the same argument used by the been written in orderly manner into
original framer. A way out would be , the Coetltution.
to have It apply to cities of 100..000
The liquor Insurgents have not a
or more Inhabitants and let it go at peg on which to hang their threaten-
that. Independent.
ed insurrection, We hope they will
think better of their mad outburst*
President Wilson's motto for the and not make themselves outlaws
Senate: ”1 came, 1 saw, I conquered;” and rebels.— Spokesman Review.
1919,
in
K
K
in
K
Ci
Z have made arrangements with DR. W. E. LEBO W to practice
Dentistry with me, and have no hesitancy in recommending him to tny
friends. He is a clean man in person and habits and knows how to do
reliable dental work. One or both of us will be at my office across tho
street, South of the Court House, on MON DA YS, TUESDAYS and
WEDNESDAYS ; at CLOVERDALE on THURSDAYS ; at N£.
HALEM on FRIDAYS; at WHEELER on SATURDAYS and
S UNDA YS until noon.
The most important teeth are the 6-year Molars.
b
B
i
PYORRHOEA
B
B
B
&
B
B
B
B
B
B
B
B
B
B
B
tí
B
Successfully
Treated
Particular
Bring your children to us for
free examination. Be sure
you are right about their
Attention
teeth.
Paid To
When
Plates
Taken in
and
Time,
Crown
Work Done
and
Evenings
Bridge Work.
4
Painless
Extracting,
Appointment.
These are the first permanent teeth the child errupts. Are most
sure to decay early and should be filled before its too late.
Most parents mistake these teeth for temporary ones and let them
go until too badly gone to save. THERE ARE FOUR SIX YEAR
MOLARS. We will gladly tell you what should be done, also the cost.
No charge for consultation
W. A. WISE, Tillamook County Dentist,
....
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Rhine Wine*.
Apropos ot the whines for mercy
that keep coming out of Germany—
Rhine whines, as they are called—
Dr. Nicholas Murray Butler of Co­
lumbia said the other day:
"Germany reminds me of a woman
who, entering her little boy in a
new school, said to the teacher:
“Leedle Fritzy he is delecate und
bo if he is badt—und he vill be badt
sometimes—joost lick the boy next
to him und dat vill frighten him. I» 1
out for what ails your smokeappetitet
For, with Prines Albert, you've got a new listen on the pipe question
that cuts you loose from old stung tongue and dry throat worries I
Made by our exclusive patented process, Prince Albert is scotfree
from bite and parch and hands you about the biggest lot of smokefun
that ever was scheduled in your direction I
Prince Albert is a pippin of a pipe-pal; rolled into a cigarette it
beats the band! Get the slant that P. A. is simply everything any
man ever longed for in tobacco! You never will be willing to
figure up the sport you’ve slipped-on once you get that Prince
Albert quality flavor and quality satiafaction into your smokesystem I
You’ll talk kind words every time you get on the firing line!
The Truthful Hunter,
A sportsman of great Imaginative
gift was telling how at one shot he
bad bagged two partridges and a
rabbit. Ills explanation was that
though he had hit only one partridge
the bird in falling had clutched at
another partridge and brought that
to earth entangled In its claws.
"But how about the rabbit?” he
was asked?”
"Oh" was the calm leply, “my
gun kicked and knocked me back­
wards and I fell on the rabbit as it
run past.”
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A Sudden Change.
"Some marriages turn out bally,"
the late Mrs. Russell Sage once re­
marked. "because after the ceremany
the husbana switches too quickly
from the romantic to the practical.
"I kuow a young wife who said,
pathetically, an evening or two after
the return of the honeymoon:
“You used to love to hold my hand
George.’
“I love to now” George answered
calmly, without looking up from his
newspaper, 'but it would keep you
from your house work dear.”
For Sale.
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Registered Guernsey Bull coming
3 years March 4th. Very gentle, Rich
in the Yeksa and Glenwood breeding.
Price, freight prepaid $200. Photo­
graph furnished on request. R. R.
Meyer, R. 2. Cornelius, Oregon.
R. J. Reynold» Tobacco Company, Winaton-Salem, N. Q
The Kansas League.
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A few years ago a candidate for
office in Kansas suffered what he
and his supporters looked upon as an
inexplicable defeat. A wise politician
of the Sunflower state, being asked
to explain the mystery, replied:
"He doesn't speak the Kansas
language.' '
To Kansas no elucidation of that
cryptic sentence was necessary, but
outside students of etymology found
the explanation almost as puzzling
as the candidate's defeat was to his
supporters. To such students light
may be vouchsafed by this extract
from an Associated Pres« story from
London containing an American sol­
dier’s answer to the question wheth­
er he could tell from his conversation
what part of the United States a
man was from:
"Sure, take a man from the South.
He speaks slow, with a drawl Air-
you- going- down- tawn tonighgt?’
—see?—like that, like a bunch of
farmers talking. A man from Chica­
go talks like a man from New York,
quick and sharp-like, with a lot of
Forgot What He Needed.
profanity.”
"But could you tell the difference
From the Republican, Mt. Giliad,
between a Chicago man and a New
York man?”
Ohio: The editor had an interesting
“Sure, a Chicago man use
__ __ more experience some time ago, when a
profanity, and he moves his hand
like this—see?—a* if he was doing young gentleman came to this office
a card trick. A New' York man’s j and asked for a copy of the Morrow
quick and soft.”
County Republican. He scrutinized
“What about the middle West?”
it carefuly when a copy was handed
“Ah, a Kansas man doesn't speak him, and then said: “Now I know!”
slow, like a southerner, or too quick, "What is it you are looking for, we
like a Chicago man, but just plain
inquired. “My wife sent me after a
and distinct, .so anyone can under­ ¡bottle of Chamberlain's Cough Reme-
stand him. Just like I speak. I came dy, and I forgot the name. I went to
front Kansas.”
several stores and the clerks named
That’s the “Kansas language” that
over everything in the line on the
any candidate for office has to talk, shelf except ’Chamberlain's. I'll try
“so anyone can understand him.—
again and I'll not go home without
New York Tribune.
Chamberlain’s Cough Remedy.” The
—-—.--------- -
Republican would suggest to the
What do you supposed would have proprleto'rs of the stores, that they
happened in this country of the Re- < post their clerks, and never let them
publican party had about doubled the substitute. Customers loose faith in
freight and passenger rates and then stores where substituting is permit-
asked for a billion dollars a year to j ted. to say nothing of the injustice
meet the deficit in operating the rail-
— -•
makers of good goods and the disap­
roads?
pointment of customers.—Paid Adv.