TILLAMOOK HEADLIGHT NOVEMBER 7, 1918, NO LOBSTER AT THAT MEAL Good and Distinct Reason Why Man Took His Dinner From the Hum­ ble Sardine Tin. A friend of mine is very fond of lob­ ster, but, like many men, has no Idea how such food is prepared. His wife hud occasion to be absent from home one day last week, and she told the servant girl to broil a lobster for tny friend’s dinner. She left a note, telling her bushand of the treat she had pro­ vided for him, and requesting him not to wait dinner for her. He was quite hungry when he reached home and, af­ ter regarding the note, said to the ser­ vant : “Is that lobster ready?” “No, sir, it isn’t,” said the girl. “Well, hurry up with It. I’m as hun­ gry as a bear," said he. “I can’t, sir,” said the girl. “The mistress said to broil the lobster, and I got him on the gridiron after a dale of fuss. The more I poked the fire the more he wulked off, and I thought the baste was haunted and no good would come from cooking a straddle bug like that.” “What did you do with It?” said my friend, getting mad. “Faith, the last I saw of him he was going out the back door with his tall up, like the maniac he was.” He had sardines for dinner.—London Mall. ALIBI PROVED FOR PRETZEL Going Far Back Into Ancient History, It Can Be Proved That It Was Not of German Origin. When the Engine Stalls on Dead Man’s Curve! “Wh-r-r-oom!” That one was close HEY climb aboard their loaded behind. The fragments of the shell are truck at sundown, fifteen miles rattling on the truck. behind the lines. They rumble through the winding streets, out on the Now shells are falling, further back white road that leads to Germany! along the road. And the driver feels the summit as his wheels begin to pick The man at the wheel used to be a up speed. broker in Philadelphia. Beside him sits an accountant from Chicago. A news­ Straight down a village street in paper man from the Pacific Coast is which the buildings are only skeletons the third. Now they all wear the uni­ of buildings. He wheels into the court­ form of one of these organizations. yard of a great shell-torn chateau. T The road sweeps round a village and £1 a tree is nailed a sign: “Attention! ’Ennemi Vous Voitl The Enemy Sees You!” “Well, you made it again I seel” says a smiling face under a tin hat—a face that used to look out over a congrega­ tion in Rochester. They glance far up ahead and there, suspended in the evening light, they see a Hun balloon. “Yep!” says the driver glancing at his watch. “And we came up Dead Man’s Curve in less than three minutes —including one stall I ” “Say, we can see him plain tonight!” murmurs the accountant from Chicago. “And don’t forget,” replies the Phila­ delphia broker, “that he can see us just as plain.” The packing cases creak and groan, the truck plods on—straight toward that hanging menace. “What’s those? Canned peaches? Gimme some. Package of American cigarettes— let’s see—an’ a cake of chocolate—an’ some of them cookies!” They reach a turn. They take it They face a heavy incline. For half a mile it stretches and they know the Germans have the range of every inch of it The mountain over there is where the big Boches’ guns are fired. This incline is their target “Goehl” says the other youngster when his wants are filled. “What would we do without you?” “ Wh-r-r-r-r-r-r-rooml ” The shell breaks fifty yards behind. Another digs a bole beside the road just on ahead. And then the engine comes to life. It crunches, groans and answers. Slowly, with maddening lack of haste, it rumbles on. House Oldest In America. Ò1 r t “Get any supplies tonight?” they ask. Then up they go, through the strange «Hence broken only when a great pro­ jectile inscribes its arc of sound far overhead. “Quick! Spin it!” calls the driver. The California journalist has jumped. He tugs at the big crank. I f Later that night two American boys, fresh from the trenches bordering that shattered town, stumble up the stairs uf the chateau, into a sandbagged room where the Rochester minister has his canteen. “You bet I did! ” is the answer, “What will you have?” At first the camion holds its speed. Then it slackens off. The driver grabs his gear-shift kicks out his clutch. The engine heaves—and heaves—and stalls! I ♦ * * ♦ They reach another village—where heaps of stone stand under crumpled walls. The three men on the truck bring up their gas masks to the alert, settle their steel helmets closer on their heads. I * * * * You hear that up and down the front, a dozen times a night—“What would we do without them?” Men and women in these organiza­ tions are risking their lives tonight to carry up supplies to the soldiers. Trucks and camionettes are creeping up as close as any transportation is permitted. From there these people are carrying up to the gun-nests, through woods, across open fields, into the trenches. The boys are being served wherever they go. Things to eat, things to read, things to smoke, are being carried up everywhere along the line. With new troops pouring into France, new supplies must be sent, more men and women by the hundreds must be enlisted. They are ready to give every­ thing. Will you give your dollars to help them help our men? * - I1M| I A t Z6>’T' Z< j 5S x I / Xw^T v ' Ó Tradition, Indorsed by the press and the testimony of the oldest in­ habitants, gives authority to the state­ ment that the oldest house. No. 54 North St. George street, St Augustine, Fla., is really the oldest house tn America. Built by the Dons In medie­ val times (1589) on the oldest street of what was the site of the Indian vil­ lage of Seloe, whose chief was Folo- mato, this ancient house has never been remodeled or modernized. The architecture is of Moorish de­ sign, antedating the Spanish. With Its coquina-terrace floors, round carved pillars in the patio, mahogany stair­ way, hewn red cedar timbers, all pegged together, secret closets and ' other substantiating hnllmarks, it I» unlike any other house In St. Augus­ I I tine, and is truly one of the sights of the ancient city. Pitt a Spendthrift The complaint that many of our | statesmen will not themselves set the fnshion in economical living in war , time is not a new one. Pitt, who preached economy and forced it on the people, was himself a notorious spend­ thrift. For a long time (while warden of the Cinque ports) his Income was £10,- 000 a year, and it never fell below £6,- 000. Yet he was always hard up, and when he died the nation, in the throes of a great war, hnd to find some £40,- 000 to satisfy his creditors. Examinations of Pitt’s household budgets—mnde from time to time at his own request—showed such Items as a hundredweight of butcher’s meat consumed In a single week—or, more accurately, charged to Pitt’s account —London Chronicle. HAS HISTORIC PAST ORIGIN I OF COUNTRY FAIR Ilfracombe, Popular English Summer Its Establishment Can Be Clearly Resort, Has Been Well Known Traced to an Ancient Rellgloua Through Many Centuries. Custom. Ilfracombe Is rapidly becoming popu­ The country fair owes its origin to lar as a summer resort—or, as the Eng­ an ancient religious custom. In early lish call it. a watering place. It is set | days, when Engilsmen observed saints’ on a steep hillside, surrounded by “the days, a crowd of worshipers and pil­ seven hills,” on the heuutiful Devon­ grims would assemble within the pre­ shire const. From the near town of cincts of the church or abbey during Hillsborough Ilfracombe shows a mass the festival of a popular saint. To of white cottages, clinging desperately supply the wants of the throng, tents to the hillside to keep from tumbling were pitched, and stalls for provisions into the Atlantic ocean. Bet up in the churchyard. Peddlers Many people think that Ilfracombe and traders found many customers Is a modern town, in spite of its quaint­ among the worshipers, nnd In course ness, because It has such an up-to-date of time these pious assemblies became air. But Ilfracombe is a skillfully cam­ marts at trade, and were known as ouflaged antique, having been a harbor “fairs.” of some note ’way back in the twelfth Many odd customs associated with century. This attractive townlet has fairs illustrate the social life of other been inflicted with a great variety of days. The opening of fairs In many Jaw-breaking names during the cen­ towns was announced by hoisting a turies of Its existence. Its names large glove In a conspicuous place. In range all the way from Aelfrlngcombe the event of a law forbidding the hold­ and Ilfordscomhe to Alfredscombe, ing of a fair without royal permission, and, at Inst, Ilfracombe. But-the good the king would send his glove to the folk round about Ilfracombe just call i town as a token of his consent. it ’Combe. In Liverpool, a hand was exhibited In 1344 Ilfracombe was one of the In front of the town hall ten days be­ 45 English ports that sent representa­ fore and after each fair day, to signify tives to the council of shipping, and In that no person coming to or going 1646 it was captured by Fairfax. They from the fair might be arrested for say there were some hot skirmishes at debt within the town’s precincts. that time In what is now known as At Paignton fair, Exeter, an Im­ “Bloody Meadow.” Some cannon balls mense plum pudding was drawn of that period found here corroborate through the town by four yoke of oxen this tale. nnd afterward distributed for the Tn these olden days wrecks near Il­ crowd. Its ingredients were: 400 fracombe were frequent, and pearls pounds of flour, 170 pounds of beef nnd other valuable treasures of the In­ suet, 140 pounds of raisins and 240 dies were often sold to advantage by eggs. It was boiled in a brewer’s cop­ the fisher folk to merchants In neigh­ per for three days and nights. boring towns- SEA BUFFALO “GOOD EATING” Other Thing« Beside the Beefsteak, to Which the Nation la Attached, May Be Made of Use. Sirloin of sea buffalo Is much es­ teemed in San Francisco and other Pacific coast cities, where meat of this highly valued animal is coming to mar­ ket in such quantities as to lower the coat of living by keeping down the price of beef and mutton. Sea cows and sea horses have long been familiarly known, but most folks would confess themselves unacquaint­ ed with the sea buffalo. If they saw one, they would call It a whale; and no wonder, for that Is the sea buf­ falo’s other name. Some people might be prejudiced against eating whale meat, but sea buffalo steak sounds good. It Is good —quite equal. In fact, to the best beef­ steak, and hardly distinguishable from the latter. In the market, sea buffalo tenderloin (boneless “filet”) costs only 15 cents a pound; other cuts are cheaper. The gray whale (common in Pacific waters) furnishes most of the meat. A 60-foot specimen will yield as much butcher’s material as 70 head of cattle. First Quakers. The first Quakers to land on Ameri­ can soil were Mary Fisher and Ann Austin, who reached Boston in 1656 sfter a long voyage from England by way of the West Indian Island of Bar­ bados. The two women caused great consternation to the Puritans, snd George Bishop, in an address to the magistrates, said: “Two women arriving in yonr har­ bor so shock ye, to the everlasting shame of you and of your established order, as if a formidable army had in­ vaded your borders.” The Quaker sect, or Society of Friends, was founded by Fox in 1648, about eight years before the first mem­ bers reached America on July 11, 1656. letter George Fox visited America. The part played by William Penn and other Quakers in the early history of Pennsylvania and New Jersey Is fa­ miliar to all studente of history. Can Shyness Be Cured? What is the remedy for shyness? What is the shy man to do in order < that he may be shy no longer? •. The remedy Is simple, and Is to be found by consideration of the cause. L. > The shy person Is shy in the presence '1 of strangers only. Let him have no opportunity of meeting strangers, and I let the opportunity be abolished not I I by abolition of the meetings, but by i abolition of the strangeness. In other words, shy persons are those who in I early life hnd not practice and no ex­ perience In meeting strangers, and so having the attention of strangers di­ Wouldn't Mix In That rected to them and attracted to them. “Howdy, ’Squire 1” saluted a young­ If the meeting with strangers becomes er neighbor. “Me and wife have got customary it losee Its strangeness. Into a sort of a jangle over naming our baby. It’s our first, and I s’pose As a Gentleman! we’re tnore particular about It than Little brother accompanied his folks who hsve a bunch of ’em. Wife, mamma on a visit to some friends in she is set and determined to name him Chicago, and Included in the entertain­ after her side of the house, and I’m ment of the visitor was a luncheon at sticking and hanging for him to be one of the fashionable cafes. Little named after one of my kin. Now, If brother was taken along because there you’H come over and settle it for us was no place to “check” him. we’ll—“ “Now, brother,” said mamma, “you “Now, looky here, Lucas!” Inter­ see thia beautiful place and all these rupted old man Backledaffer. “While lovely ladles—you are the only man I hate peace as much as anybody, and present, and I want you to be very more than a good many, I haln’t so polite and act Just like your father absolutely senseless and foolhardy as would If he was here.” all that!”—Kansas City Sun. “Well,” said brother, “I guess I’ll take a cigarette.” \ Knowledge Gained by Experience. A young ensign, acting as school Enterprise. teacher on the battleship Texas, says “How far can you travel on a gal­ Philadelphia Public Ledger, asked lon of gssollne?” the question: "What are the two prin­ “Not as fur as I used to,” replied cipal parts of a sentence?” He ex­ Mr. Chuggins. “But I’m hoping to re­ pected, of course, to get the answer. duce the expense by developing a by­ “Subject and predicate.” product. The gasoline Is so oily and Tho old "salt” who was called o the roads sre so rough that with a lit­ scratched his head in perplexity and tle care we ought to make every trip at last replied: "Solitary contlnemen’ yield a good churning of axle grease. ” and br< nd water." UNITED WAR WORK CAMPAIGN I"I*SX<« Now comes the lowly pretzel before the bar of public opinion in a valorous attempt to remove the stigma of Ger- man origin. It has delved deep into ancient history to prove its alibi and upon the face of the evidence pre- sented It has made out a reasonable case for Itself. Indignantly does the pretzel deny that it sprang from un­ hallowed association with German beer; that use it declares Is a dese­ cration of Its originally high birth, a degradation characteristically Teu- tonic. The pretzel insists that it Is Inherently a baked prayer, for In the early day of the Christian church the pretzel was nsed almost exclusively as a reward of merit given by a priest to children for learning their prayers. In the monasteries of the middle ages the pretzel was considered a rare del­ icacy, and during lent it was the usual alms offering. Furthermore the very crookedness of the pretzel Is a crush­ ing argument against its calumniators, tor it represents the arms folded In prayer. Thus stands the ease for tbs sanctity of the humble pretzel. TOWN SUPREME IN INSECT MIMICRY Really Wonderful Act of Caterpillar Shows Nature'« Protection Thrown Around Innocents. I witnessed a quaint little scene on a blackthorn buBb In Epping forest a day or two ago, writes “L. F.” In Manchester (Eng.) Guardian. It Is well known that many species of cat­ erpillars so closely resemble the brown, barked stems, while others, be­ ing green, fix themselves to the new green stems of the current year's growth. Among the blackthorn twigs I ob­ served one young member of the dark­ er species sticking out, rigid and mo­ tionless, at the orthodox angle of 45 degrees, from apparently a young green shoot. On closer examination I discovered that the young green shoot was itself a caterpillar sticking out at an angle of 45 degrees. What had happened was obvious. The disguise of the green caterpillar was bo perfect that even another cater­ pillar—ltBelf a master in the art of twig Imitation—had palpably been Completely deceived and mistaken the green caterpillar for a twig. Surely this is a triumph of insect mimicry. Ideal Friendship. '} Insincerity may fascinate—but it M not lovable. Only honesty and direct­ ness fit dealing can win a lasting at­ tachment. Artificial folk are desper­ ately afraid of the picturesquely un­ conventional actions that they think will make them ridiculous. They are so stiff and starched in their unman- nerllness that they ere hopelessly un­ interesting. Sticklers for etiquette and for the observances of all the mi­ nor canons of good form, they find so many petty, silly rules to follow that they have no time to give rein to large and generous Impulses. A personality that makes Itself count ardently and lastingly In other lives and for the world’s well being Is too high for spite, too noble for mean, small ways, too genuine for Intrigue and Innuendo and too faithful to sacrifice a friend. History of a 8tar. The hlatory of a star begins with dust and ends with dust. It takes Its form out of chaotic nebulae, passes through a period of life, grows cool, then dark and dead, and ultimately dashes into another dark cloud of star dust, and is thus turned back into nebula. We on earth live our lives In auch a short moment that evolution among the stars In not at once apparent. It would require a great many centuries to actually see a blue sun become white, then yellow, then finally red. While it is not possible to watch any one star living its life, yet by noting the characteristics of a great many, a complete and logical chain of evi­ dence may be fonnd, which includes representative stars of every type In the sky. Society of the Cincinnati. The historic Society of the Cincin­ nati, oldest of the American patriotic organizations, was founded by officers of the Continental forces and of the French army and fleet which aided us in gaining our Independence at the close of the Revolutionary war, 135 years ago, Washington was Its first president general, Hamilton the sec­ ond, and on Its original rolls appear the names of many others who gained fame for their services In the cause of liberty. Its membership, composed of the eldest male descendants of these otilcers, now numbers about 1,000. That Evened Things Up. One day niy two little nieces were discussing which had been with her mother the longer. "I’ve been with mother longer than you have,” said the elder. After thinking a few moments her yonnger sister answered, “Yes, but I’ve been with God longer.” — Chicago Tribune.