TILLAMOOK HEADLIGHT. OCTOBER 14. 1909 Dining Room of ■ Circuo. Tbe diM'ipIlne of army rvlguz au pretne lu elr< ua life, aud It is always lute rest Ing to watcb oow tbe thousand or m< n- people of such an organiza­ tion are fed. three meals a day without a blteb a off as silently as In a big hotel Tbe grass serves as a carpet, and the forty or more waiters move quickly In and out. Tbe kitchen tent is completely equipped with pastry ovens, warming tables, steam vats for stewing, steam urns for cotfee and tea. boiling ovens aud numberless other cooking utensils. Tbe force of cooks numliera sixteen, including tbe three which tend tbe campfire, at which nothing but soup is prepared. Tbe ranges fold up and are carried in wagons, and the tents are lighted with electricity at night. It la not unusual to serve as many as 5.000 pancakes for breakfast, aud U00 loaves of bread are used each day. In addition to crackers and biscuit. Tbe meat consumed each day is somewhere near 1.000 pounds. Such provisions as celery, young on­ ions. strawberries, radishes, melons, etc., are bought in eaph town, often cleaning out tbe entire market. An advance agent of tbe commissary de­ partment keeps well In advance of the show, contracting for its supplies for num and beast.—Popular Mechanics. A Craving For 8weats. Advocating the use of sweet fruits, preserves, sugar and good candy by children. Dr. Woods Hutchinson In Success says that a craving for sweets Is nature's call for the substance w hich Is "a full blown member of the great trinity of nutrient materials, sug­ ar (carbohydrate), meat (protein) and fat. Sugar is wood. coal, gasoline for tbe muscle engine. Every time the tiny engine gives one of its rhythmical explosions—that is to say, when a mus­ cle contracts—a certain amount of sug­ ar is burned up. It is fortunate for people whom a mistaken conscience deprives of sweets that tbe human body can manufacture sugar out of mau.v foods, out of meat. milk, vege­ tables and grains; otherwise the body would go Into the desperate business of manufacturing sugar out of its own tissues, which Is precisely what dia­ betics did In the days when this dis­ ease was supposed to be due to too much sugar in the food and physicians tried to cure It by cutting sweets and sweetmakers out of tbe patient’s diet. 8hak«spa«r* on Baseball. I will go root.—“Richard III.” Now you strike like the blind man.— “Much Ado About Nothing.” Out. I say!—“Macbeth." I will be short.—“Hamlet.” Thou canst not hit it. hit It. hit It!— “Love's Labour's Lost.” He knows the game.—“Henry VI.” Oh. hateful error!—“Julius Caesar.” A bit. a bit, a very palpable hit!— “Hamlet." He will steal, sir.—“All’s Well That Ends Well." Whom right and wrong have chosen as umpire.—“Love's luibour's Lost.” Let the world slide.—“The Taming of tbe Shrew.” He has killed a fly.—“Titus Andronl- cus.” Tbe play as I remember pleased not tbe million.—“Hamlet.” What an arm he baa!—"Coriolanus.” They cannot sit at ease on tbe old bench.—"Romeo and Juliet.” Upon such sacrifices tbe gods them­ selves throw Incense.—"King Lear.” — Washington Post. Old Cures. Tbe antiquary took down a little gray book. “Here Is a 'family doc­ tor.' " he said, “that was published as fur back as IDOL Talk about your quaint prescriptions!" Tbe first pre­ scription. a truly quaint one. ran; “If a man be greved wytb the failiage sicknesses, let him take a tie wolves bnrte and make It to powder and use It; but If It be a woman, let her take a she-wolves harts." A 1501 jaundice cure wus: "Take eartbwormes and cut them small, ami brays them wytb a lit­ tle wyne so that ye may swallow It; drlneke the same fasting.” For tooth­ ache: "Sesth as tuauy little frogges sitting upon trees as thou canst get. In water: take the fat flowynge from them, and when nede la, anoynt tbe teth tberwytb.” Buying the First Bond. lu tbe Ilves of most |>eople there are a few moments that are not only big with Importance, but remain long In the memory. Due of these moments may be tbe first sight of tbe ocean; auotber. when great, anow clad moun­ tains first come Into view. Still an­ other. though perhapa not quite so ro­ mantic. Is that time when tbe average mao or woman draws bls or bsr sav­ ings out of a bank and buys tbe first bond.—Moody's Magazine. Sensitive Salmon. "Spleudld color, Isu't ItF asked a fishmonger ns he cut a pound or two of salmou for a customer. “Yea." replied the latter, “looks as If It were blushing at tbe price you ask for it!*'—London Scrape. An Ancient Sky Pilot. The Modern Way. From Gai nett's "Anthology.” volume : One friend who has s|H-ut a long land useful life and looks good for an- 7, page 48. 1 copy tbe following. tak*>n i other half ceutury expects his reward from tbe “Writings of Lucian." a lu oeaven and meantime is a philos­ Greek born about 100 A. D.: "We were suddeuly caught by a opher He can talk on any subject under tbe sun. from "the Hower of whirlwind, which turned our vessel several times around in a circle witb |M>eay" to "the precession of the eqnl | mixes.” He apimrently knows the I tremendous velocity and lifted it "Iliad" and “Odyssey" by heart, so I above 3.000 stadia in tbe air. not set­ knew that when he handed me a bit tling It down again on tbe sea. but kept it suspended above the water at ; of verse it must be good. I “Here Is a hymn on the solar sys­ ' that height and carried fis ou. with tem or some other lofty theme.' swelled sails, alajve the eloijjs." lu these days of air conquest this thought 1. placing the sheet in my let­ ter case. When 1 arrived borne I read: quotation might be of utmost Interest The llxard climbed a wall. He climbed it to aeronauts and also literary men. once. i This ancient Gulliver long preceded He climbed it twice—then crawled away. ■ Swift, aud as for outdistancing Jules Verne another quotation Is added: The bee sipped a flower. He sipped It once. “Having thus continued our course He sipped It twice—then flew away. through the sky for a space of seven The man kissed a maid. He kissed her days and as many nights, ou tbe eighth once. day we desc ribed a sort of earth in tbe He kissed her twice—then walked away. air." etc. (which proved to be tbe The wall wasn't sunny; the flower had no moon i. honey; Tbe thoroughly familiar vernacular The maid had no money. Funny! i expression "going some" applies witb The problem now is whether the con­ original vigor to this early and per­ tribution Is a joke or a gem. —National haps first sky pilot.—New York Times. Magazine. An Obliging President. Pilkerton Won the Race. During a short lived revolution, says At one of the regattas of the Na­ Harper's Weekly, there came to be tional Association of American Oars the bead of tbe government in a little men during the early nineties .lames Central American republic a man who Pilkerton. for many years the cham­ was above all things courteous and pion sculler of America, was matched ! who was. moreover, very anxious to to row double against another team. gain the good will of the foreign con­ He and his mate were the champions, suls. One of tbe latter, having beard and tbe general belief was that they that a certain countryman of his had would win without effort. But the died, addressed a note to the bead of night before the regatta public opinion the new government. In which he stat­ suddenly and mysteriously changed. ed that his own government would be Mr. Pilkerton knew that this was not grateful for a certificate of death of caused by any new development of tbe individual in question. A few­ strength In his opponent or any loss of days later the consul received this skill on bls own part. After making communication: some quiet Inquiries he discovered that Esteemed Senor—I blush to say that I there was talk of bls rowing mate hav­ cannot at present comply with your ex­ cellency's request tor a death certificate ing been bought up by the other side and of an arrangement to throw the ot the man named. 1 sent my soldiers, but he got away, to my shame. 1 shall race. use every effort to catch him. however, He didn't say anything about his sus­ and hope to send your excellency the de­ picions. but when the two men were sired certificate at an early date. Needless to say. the cousul lost no seated in the shell and were well out Into the deep water he leaned over to time in communicating to tbe obliging president tbe information that the cer­ bls mate and said: "Look here, you blooming cutthroat! tificate was undesjred. in view of the You've got to swim, drown or win this fact that the individual was able to "get away.” race! You know me!” He won. Would Bequeath Her Ears. Harriet Martineau displayed orig­ inality In the provisions she made at one time for the disposal of her re­ mains. James Payn relates that, hav­ ing consulted Toynbee, the distinguish­ ed aurlst. with regard to her deafness, "she was so pleased with tbe interest be took in her case that she resolved to leave him by testamentary bequest her ears. She announced this inten­ tion in the presence of her medical man. Mr. Shepherd, who to my luti- nlte amazement observed: 'But. tuy dear madam, you can't do that. It will make your other legacy worth­ less.' The fact was. In the interest of science. Miss Martineau had already left her head to the Phrenological so­ ciety. I asked tbe doctor bow be came to know that. 'Oh,' be said, ‘she told me so herself. She has left £10 In her codicil to me for cutting It off.' ” The doctor, however, died be­ fore his patient, and tbe Phrenological society never received tbe legacy of her bead.—London Chronicle. A Cheerful Letter. The following was sent by a country­ man to bls son In college not many years ago: My Dear Son—I write to send you two pair of old breeches, that you may have a new coat made ot them: also some new socks, which your mother knit by cutting down some ot mine. Your mother sends you 110 without my knowledge, and mr tear you will not spend it wisely 1 have kept back halt and only send five. Your moth­ er and 1 are well, except your sister An­ nie has got the measles, which we think would spread among other girls It Tom had not had them before, and he Is the only one left. I hope you are well and will do honor to my teachings, it you do not you are an ass, and your mother and myselt are your affectionate parents. —Nantucket Inquirer aud Mirror. A Nice Bird. "Do you like a nice bird?" asked the host as they sat down to the table. “Ob. yes!” responded the guest im­ mediately and enthusiastically. “You ought to call on my sister," ex­ plained the other. "She's got one of the finest canaries you ever saw. Well, wbat kind of a sandwich do you think you can eat?"—London Telegraph. An Arbitrary Classification. "So you think every patriot has a more or less clearly defined nmbitiou to hold public office?" "Yes," answered Senator Sorghum. "As a rule, patriots may be divided Into two classes—the appointed and tbe disappointed."—Washington Star. Badly Expressed. "For beaveu's sake, be careful with that rifle, man!" exclaimed a musketry instructor. "You Just missed me that time." "Did I. sergeant? I’m awfully sorry!” responded tbe ludlffereut marksman.— London Fun. A Good Ear. Mrs. Dyer-Have you ever called on It Quieted Mother. the people In the next apartment? The house was all paid for. Mother Mrs. Gossip—No; the walls are so was exultant, jubilant, reiterative. thin that I know all about tbelr af­ "Say, mother," burst out six-year-old fairs.—Brooklyu Life. Paul eagerly, "print It on your cards, mother, print it on your cards!”—De­ A Pessimist. lineator. “A pessimist." said tbe philosopher of folly, “la one who. when he has The Usual Thing. the choice of two evitai chooses both "What> the proper thing at a wed­ and sticks around to watt for more"— ding?" Cleveland Leader. “Wish tbe pair happiness and tell everybody else there's no earthly Both Alike. chance for It.“—Louisville Courier- Mother (complatntnglyl—Will aoema Journal. to have forgotten us at college. Ma There Is a paradox tn pride—It makes letters are so short Father (tersely)— Ro la Will wheu he writes 'em-Balti- some men ridiculous, tat prevents others from becoming so.—Ooitou more Atnaricgn. A West Indian Wife Catcher. As is customary witb Indians tbe world over, tbe Carlbs are expert basket weavers, and many strong aud handsome baskets are to be bought in Roseau at reasonable prices if one finds the right shops, writes Harriet Quimby in Leslies Weekly. A pecul­ iar instrument, made of basket straw and woven closely together so as to form a hollow tube ending in a thong of twisted ends uud commonly dubbed a wife catcher, is also made and sold by tbe Carlbs. By slipping tbe hollow end over a mao's finger above tbe joint and pulling on the twisted end the catcher will tighten around the Unger and the captive will be unable to release his band. It is claimed that tbe Indians formerly employed this device as a handcuff for prisoners, using several for each hand aud lead­ ing tbe captives by tbe fingers. Few tourists are permitted to leave Roseau without a wife catcher, for which six­ pence Is wlljiugly exchanged. Tillamook | Lumber Manufacturing Compyl Manufacturers of 7* f FIR, SPRUCE AND < ¡H emlock LUMBER? C KILN DRY FLOORING, CEILING, RUSTIC AND % % FINISHED LUMBER. S S ALL KINDS OF MOULDINGS, We Make the Best CHEESE BOXES for Tillamook < C County’s Most Famous Cheese. C The Best Equipped Saw Mill in the County. «£ New Machinery, Experienced Workmen and % First Class Lumber of the Best Quality. on a time when tbe donkey was lost Nasr- ed-Dln went about seeking II. at the same time giving thanks as he went. "Why do you give thanks?" asked his friend. "1 see no cause for thank fulness." "Cause enough!" was the prompt re­ ply. "Why. tnau alive. If I had been along with that donkey I'd have been lost too!”—New York Tribune. Use For the Anchor. ••Captain." remarked the nuisance on shipboard who always asks foolish questions, "what is the object in throwing tbe anchor overboard?" "Young man." replied tbe old salt, "do you understand the theory of seismic disturbances? Well, we throw the anchor overboard to keep tbe [ ocean from slipping away In tbe fog.” Ohl "How did you act when be pro­ posed?" "I sank gracefully on one knee.” "How ridiculous! What In the world did you sink on your knee for?" "On bis knee, not miue."—Houston root. Quits a Difference. Customer-Can t you give anything off to a clergyman? Tradesman—Not In this Instance, sir. You see. these goods Is different from yours. These Is guaranteed goods.—Life. Love, like fortune, turns upon a wheel and Is very much givei to ris­ ing aud falling —Vanbrugh. FARMERS READ THE \ . WEEKLY OREGONIAN ( I OF PORTLAND For the general news of the / World also for information abouft how io obtain the best results in cultivating the soil, Stock I Raising Fruit Growing etc. You can secure this excellent paper by Subscribing for the Headlight* Both Papers for $2.25.